otuka your my inspiration I love you 😭…I made a track and I hope some people might like it ill take criticism guys haha dw

how does one make such a…like what do I even call this 😭

produced by guda & JibaoRockin

lyrics: 
open your eyes
open your eyes
open your eyes
open your eyes, eyes

i know you see me
you cant deceive me
you act like it's easy
to throw me away to rot

i know you see me
i know that
just open your eyes
just open up your eyes

you're not blind you're not deaf
i know you see and hear me well
you choose not to hear me
i feel i need to yell
and you say that it's love
but i'm not sure if you mean well
til death do us part
i guess i'll see your ass in hell
i'll see you then
i don't know when
just open your eyes
and you'll see me again
i'm neither foe or a friend
it's only us in the end
wish you could see through my lens
won't you just

open your eyes (just open up)
open your eyes (can you see me?)
open your eyes(just open up)
open your eyes, eyes (can you see me?)

ah

open your eyes

sorry for being gone so long im gonna try to be more 
active.

i cant see a way to stop this

moving out the ways an option

i cant seem to brace the nonsense

im not here im barely conscious 

make me feel alive im honest-

ly just terrified of losses 

i cant feel the way i wanted

im just building blue up on it

bleedin out

i cant see for now

its all going down but then u come around

gonna drown feel like im gonna drown

but then you pull me out u pull me out

im not going alone

id rather smash up my phone

the only contact i know

is just sitting at home

if you’re not feeling to go

baby then we just wont go

the real feeling of home

its us together alone

blue (mila moon)

tell me how it feels to fade away

produced by malcriado 

lyrics:

oh to feel your hands run through my hair again 
to hear you call my name id do it all again
to feel your warmth and body on my skin
to have someone around to call a friend
is that too much to ask for? shall I beg?


I can’t forget 
you know that it’s killing me inside
cuz it should’ve been me instead that night
wonder if they’ll remember me when I die
but we’ll never know 

to hear you call my name id do it all again
to feel your warmth and body on my skin
to have someone around to call a friend
is that too much to ask for? shall I beg?

skin

lyrics:

I don’t really like to say what’s on mind
feel like my hands and tongue are tied when I’m with you
when I’m with you
(x2)


you said “talk to me when you need it”
what’s the point if you don’t mean it?
too many missed calls
give me a reason
you don’t listen when I’m grieving 

I’ve been looking left and right for a reason
get excited when you’re leaving for the weekend
ima make a couple bands off the feeling
I just need a pen and paper, I don’t need them

tell me where you at when I’m hurting?
I can’t say a word without feeling like a burden

(yeah yeah yeah)

always feeling uncertain
gotta cut em off, close the blinds and the curtains

you don’t know what you do to me
fuck round with my head like you can’t believe 
I’m fine, I’ll be better when you fucking leave

(yeah yeah yeah)

I don’t really like to say what’s on mind
feel like my hands and tongue are tied when I’m with you
when I’m with you
(x2)

tongue tied

produced by redmosk

lyrics:

It’s been so long since I woke up not feeling like this
I try my best just to ignore it but I can’t hold it in
I try my best just to be honest, don’t know where to begin
I’d put my pride down for me not to feel this again
(x2)

I’d put my pride down
Set it aside now
And fantasize bout 
how it would be better if I said the way I felt
Instead of something else
I’ll tell you everything until I’m nothing but a shell of myself
Cuz I’m nothing without my thoughts
All the things that cause my brain to rot
I can’t help it
I feel helpless
I hate that I felt this way and there’s me to blame

It’s been so long since I woke up not feeling like this
I try my best just to ignore it but I can’t hold it in
I try my best just to be honest, don’t know where to begin
I’d put my pride down for me not to feel this again
(x2)

pride

produced by grayskies

lyrics:

it takes time to materialize your fantasies
in due time i'll find myself a remedy
or write songs, obsessing bout the melody
i'm headstrong but it's bout time that it gets to me

i shut down and shut my mouth
tryna save some face
a clenched jaw and a sweat drop

bout a second fore i break
if it all falls down
just know i gave it my all
til there was not more i could take
i don't call
and now they're saying that i changed up
it fucks my brain up
(x2)

they don't even try to see where i'm coming from
cuz when i needed it more, i had no one
but i don't even blame em for it
yeah, i would never shame em for it
i'd hate but i can't afford it

i'm way too focused on me
i'm giving into my hopes and greed
but they try to paint like it's much worse than it seems
and they wonder why i'm tearing at the seams
i try to bear it til i

shut down and shut my mouth
tryna save some face
a clenched jaw and a sweat drop

bout a second fore i break
if it all falls down
just know i gave it my all
til there was not more i could take
i don't call
and now they're saying that i changed up
it fucks my brain up
(x2)

break

jades - word vomit

cuz not available in my country
https://youtu.be/Ld0Vv7VDwZU?si=QnrumwbddjZLbRQE

otuka - listen

throwaway

I’ve turned through every page in the book
still don’t know if I shouldn’t or I should
cuz you taste so bittersweet 
it’s like it shouldn’t have been me
but I can’t lie to you, it feels so good

feel like I should’ve known better
is this everything I wanted?
cuz I got it but I wish that i could-

take a u-turn, let it crumble
watch it burn down into rubble 
hoping that you go and find another one of me 

bitch I wish you would
but you prolly could
(oh why?)

wish u would

Bleed

prod. grayskies

[LYRICS]
I remember what you did
You told me that you’d stay
I gave you my whole heart
And you just threw it all away
What we had it wasn’t perfect
But I still think that I’d say
I really really loved you
Even if it was all fake

And somehow I still wish you stayed

I knew we weren’t perfect
But I still tried to wait
I thought it would get better
Could you tell me if I’m late
I’m trying to find the feeling in my heart
That your love gave
This love I can’t forget
And now I realize it was fake

Oh what do I do?
I still think about you
Oh what do I do, I do, I do
Oh what do i do?
I still think about you
Oh what do I do?

I remember what you did
You told me that you’d stay
I gave you my whole heart
And you just threw it all away
What we had it wasn’t perfect
But I still think that I’d say
I really really loved you
Even if it was all fake

And somehow I still wish you stayed

I knew we weren’t perfect
But I still tried to wait
I thought it would get better
Could you tell me if I’m late
I’m trying to find the feeling in my heart
That your love gave
This love I can’t forget
And now I realize it was fake

I remember what you did
You told me that you’d stay
I gave you my whole heart
And you just threw it all away

fake

otuka - alive (scrapped extended demo)

[LYRICS]

You pierced my heart right through my chest
I didn’t want this thing to end
Now I’m bleeding out my body
Would you hold me till I’m dead
Hold me till I’m dead
The blood you’ve spilled my darling
Both your hands are stained with red
So hold me till I’m dead
Hold me till I’m dead
Please just hold me till I'm-
It hurts my heart to say your name
The cadence of you brings me pain
Act innocent but you’ve got stains
Like falling glass I feel the rain like my tears
Got cuts that you might fear
We're not the same my dear
So save yourself
And get away from here
You pierced my heart right through my chest
I didn’t want this thing to end
Now I’m bleeding out my body
Would you hold me till I’m dead
Hold me till I’m dead
The blood you’ve spilled my darling
Both your hands are stained with red
So hold me till I’m dead
Hold me till I’m dead
Please just hold me till I'm dead
So hold me till I’m dead
Hold me till I’m dead
Please just hold me till I'm dead

till I'm dead

I saw your eyes looking past the sign
Felt like you were gone but your hand was holding mine
You breath slow, I'm in a place I'd never be
Said you liked the way I talked, but you never even looked at me

Yeah your eyes said more than your lips ever did
Not a lesson I needed back then
And mine still searched crowded
For the way it was back when

I saw your eyes looking past the sign
Felt like you were gone but your hand was holding mine
You breath slow, I'm in a place I'd never be
Said you liked the way I talked, but you never even looked at me
Gunmetal eyes, you stare through mine
Said it was love, but I hope that's what you find
Gunmetal eyes

I kissed the air where you used to stand
You always hated the snow, the way it made things slow
You always made things slow
You always made things slow

I saw your eyes looking past the sign
Felt like you were gone but your hand was holding mine
You breath slow, I'm in a place I'd never be
Said you liked the way I talked, but you never even looked at me
Gunmetal eyes, you stare through mine
Said it was love, but I hope that's what you find
Gunmetal eyes

Gunmetal eyes
Gunmetal eyes

open your eyes

otuka

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