LYRICS

D.B. Cooper:
I’ve got a verse here, so for my opening
I request a cigarette, as I’m about to smoke this kid
You’ve got windows making your crew all head to depression
I’ve got Bond-style escape plans; 00-727
D.B. Cooper, I drop bombs a plenty 
against T.V. bloopers, average emcees
This washup would fit with the rest of my bundles of dollars
Know that I go for the throat, remind you of your father?

Dead Bart:
Were you trying to impress me? You should know I’m good at breakthroughs
I’m jumpin’ on this beat like it was your escape route
This dude couldn’t even see the better choice for a main ‘chute
So I’ll be eating up this track like “what’s the deal with airplane food?”
I left Matt Groening crying when he read up on my story
You left the plane when the flight got a little too boring
And I thought I was the sitcom, but when I look at this loser
He looks less like Dan and more like Sheldon Cooper
Facin’ off with Dead Bart, now your heartbeat might stop
This sketch’s sketchy headshot went up for a high cost
But your body’s most likely outlined with white chalk
Now FOX’s best son’s stealing Zodiac Earhart’s time slot
You hit the runway and still, no one knows what your name is
I hit the runway and my face instantly became famous
Even with a rainstorm, I still got colder bars in this fight
So take your leave and take a leap into the dark of the night

D.B. Cooper:
I thought the Simpsons’ could drop bars, but it’s clear you can’t battle me
When your rapping’s more barebones than your family
And you wrote down all the tropes you decided to ride on
Then turned the creepypasta genre to the Squidward Suicide Squad
Keep this bank noted as I’m crushing this duel
Even my blank motive has more substance than you
Leave the tank loaded and get the show on the road
And when I’m flowing, know that I’m holding a grudge in this feud
The Nightmare at 20,000 Feet, towering over your treehouse
Thinking this D.B. beef is gonna leave me beat? How?
I’m hijacking this win, as you’re left shaking and crying 
Leaving you like my legacy - radio silent

Dead Bart:
Traveling on Northwest, yet your plan still went south
Go eat my shorts, man, open the stairwell and step out
And make like your exit and drop this fight
Chalk your loss up as another prediction we’ve gotten right

CREDITS 

Swizkii as D.B. Cooper
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCs4l43CoLWyUMdaWq9S_SKA
Shimario as Dead Bart
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsFyrvAhPhiEvJ1yL_Ux8MQ

Written by Rabi
Mixed and mastered by Freshy Kanal
https://soundcloud.com/freshy-kanal
Beat by Insanebeatz
Dead Bart art by 01Tyler10
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrIDPJLlnUFILYuS72fIc1g
Thumbnail by Rabi

D.B. Cooper vs. Dead Bart - Rap Battle

Ready for Round Two?
Spidey Fam as Sonic.exe
Mancha as Squidward's Suicide
Beat produced by Tantu
Beat mixed by GlitchDude
Written by Trakked
Additional help by M!CAH, Nooby, Candyman, M&Mattie, Worms, Snakebite126 and QuickDissa
Mixed by Jort
Thumbnail by Jort
Art by Trakked

Battle:

Sonic.exe:
ACT ONE: I’m the guy that drives readers to madness
YOU CAN’T RUN, hell, you can’t even get off your mattress
How do you expect to win if you act like you live
Under the BLACK SUN, stop acting like your life's been so tragic
Yeah, you should begin to bow, on the ‘net I’m infamous
Get a soul and rip it out, they know fun is infinite 
You think that you’re different, now? You know death is imminent.
Suicide, I won’t allow. You don’t get that privilege.
And I will say, it’s brave that you went to perform on stage
But they’d much rather cave their faces in than hear you for a day
But I’ll help you before you crack under pressure again
Your episode and soul are lost; come and play with me, friend..

Squidward’s Suicide:
I’d like to play you a song. Sit down and listen.
I’m disappointed with all the shots that you’re missing.
And you’re attempting to escape from the cartridge that bottles you?
Note to evade the Minors while you’re suffering in Solitude
Your Hopes and Dreams have been buried since your beginning
You cheat at every game you play, yet there is emptiness in winning.
And like me, you’ve degraded to a shell of yourself
Sonic can't handle ocean flow, so I'll drench you as well

Sonic.exe:
Oh, what's wrong, Squidward? Am I getting in your head?
You know that your neighbors hate you and would rather have you dead
Wouldn't you agree that you've been soft with your lines, friend?
You may have some more disses, but you've so little time left…
Let’s play Hide and Seek, you’re behind that ego and tryna be something quite unique
But your lines are weak and your life is bleaker; don’t cry to me, now it’s time to see 
You are merely a toy on my shelf to play with, I’ll shred you and tear you and rip your face, then
Blast your head to Red Mist, like the dead kids, what do you expect when you play with Satan?
DO IT. Now that you’ve seen the terror I have wrought,
A hopeless soul will burn forever knowing I Am God.

Squidward’s Suicide:
Why do you keep trying? I can’t take any more of this…
You take your only friends and leave them like the tortured kids
We’re both failures, yet you have no excuse.
Grab the strings you pull to hang yourself and prove yourself some use.
You try and try to hide them yet your flaws aren’t so hard to see
Since you and Sally couldn’t make a perfect harmony
You hunted Amy down to stop her from breaking your heart
But try to take apart my frames, and you’ll end up taken apart.
No more games. No more tricks, and I will never be your friend.
Your files are executable, so now you face the end.
You think you’re some eldritch deity inside a franchise
You're not a god, all 8-bits of your frames have died
Your reality exists within a cell
I'll pull the plug on your computer, then see you in Hell.

Sonic.exe vs Squidward's Suicide - Rap Cypher #40

Mimikyu vs. Nosk - Royal Rap Battle!

Egomanic As Nosk

 As Mimikyu

Thumbnail by Tompuffs

Mixed by Jort

Art by Tompuffs

Written by King Ducky & King Wallace

Nosk:
Enter Deepnest and you'll meet with a horror unseen
Next to me, this freakish creature just borders obscene
Jessie supports her dull creep for her dumb schemes
Even compared to The Knight, you’re a shorter numb freak (hehehe)

This goth is caught in balls, rags as soft as cotton balls
All who see you’s lost their pulse even goddamn shopping malls
The loser’s always lonely, keeps on tangling up his feelings
But don’t get too hung up on that or you're dangling from the ceiling!

This guy brings quite demise to disguises
Its guise implies it hides it's violence 
The cries big size discoloured it's eyes and
Boohoo, it’s true Pikachu’s who he despises

Mimikyu:
Ughhhhh, you're sure talking a lot
For a hobbled up bug (yeah) that's an optional boss
See, I leave any who dares sneak a peek in defeated
Hahaha… your biggest attacks erupting cheese wiz

Ya and your cheese strat’s meaning you’re easily beaten
Like jesus, seems this bleak itch has ledges as a weakness
I’ll creep into Deepnest, leave a diseased bug in pieces
Stealing from Vengefly King so much, even the screech is repeated

Oh his wits and thoughts are gone, all you think is dot dot dots
Your shit is off the walls, like you shitting off the walls
You’re uglier than a Wailmer, no way you can fail more
Shaked to your core, turn you ghostly like your pale ore

Nosk:
This fairy’s feelings are bottled up, wanting to snuggle forever
But now I’ll bottle up this fairy, like the troubled Collector
Torment till your not more but morbid corpse is battered weak
All you're important for is sword dance and shadow sneak!

Mimikyu:
So this is what the spider spat as his dumb rap retort?
All the build up for what? Just to run back and forth?
You will stay gimmicky no matter who this idiot’s mimicking
I’ll twist and rip your stringy ligaments like I'm nitpicking

Mimikyu vs. Nosk - Royale Rap Battle! [ft. Egomanic]

Recorded August 2024

6/12

Prod by Boston MG
Special Thanks to ToonyLoony

wow this battle is too long! heres the doc link to the lyrics!

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1G9yhn2qEhK__y4y2DDNPo0oHrEyz2DKYRFUJ-HOZRK4/edit

sorry for the same series matchup its like deadpool vs wolverine but with characters i care about.

soooo yeah the whole idea with this battle was that id advertise this as x23 VS ladypool as a nod towards the whole wolverine vs deadpool thing, but then gwenpool would take ladypools place as a fun fourth wall break because ive been a huge fan of gwenpool and i would literally kill someone to write a gwenpool battle, but obviously doing something that relies on a trend puts a timer on the battle and welp, the best before date has passed by a while ago.

also! shoutout to toonyloony, who was cast as x23, for chiselling and feedback. they were really pleasant to speak to and super eager to contribute, which was a massive relief for someone like me who gets very very anxious always all the time. unfortunately just being busy sorta delayed this project and i wanted to let this demo out into the wild because im sorta just incapable of finishing it haha. they rewrote a couple things to make the performance flow a lot better but since i never rerecorded those changes into he demo, none of them are in here 😶

one thing that i try to do with all my battles is have a special little gimmick that gives me a reason to listen to it again and this battles gimmick is that gwenpool does the fourth wall breaks and x23 does the fight section of the battle. i really like using gwenpool fourth wall breaks to like, tell the listener to loop the battle or to call out random meta shit, and im proud with how i organized the fight section which hopefully made sense. 

if i were to change anything itd prolly just be writing laura better. especially w better punchlines, i was attached to a couple of ideas that, in execution, didn’t really work out the way i thought. but oh well! hindsight is 20/20.

Gwenpool VS X-23 - 12 Bars of Dissmas #6

garbageGothic as Vena (Psychopomp)

Near as Eleanor (Subway Midnight)

Beat: U-Boat by Ihaksi
Mixed by: SIR Rap Battles
Written by: TaigaTonic
Thumbnails by: M!CAH
Art by: Nooby and Syroquise 
Special Thanks: Shimario, Duckky, bubbydarkstar, Karbonic, Sketchy

Psychopomp:
I’m sick of the fucking noise so now I gotta scream at the fucking void
Stalking victims and playing with them like they were just a toy
I’m nailing those who cross me, while I go fulfill my vision
Leave you broken like the connections and body’s of your siblings! 
Cause you couldn't save them so you were driven mad. Now
stuck to the shadows cause you’re blending in the background 
They tried hiding the truth from me, and thought that I wouldn't mind it
Lying behind their fucking masks but now I leave them open minded

So stay quiet, I know your schtick, same cliche every story did
Lost someone close to them and now thinks murder as revenge is warranted
To fix their broken, lonely heart but can’t realize it doesn't work. Your
running from all of your fucking problems like it was fucking Subway Surfers

Fallen as a victim to the system now your riding 
off the back of all the cultists your creator put in hiding
I crushed The Head of Production and left The Queen dismembered too 
Treat you like the other sinners without a SINGLE SOUL TO REMEMBER YOU

Subway Midnight:
Easy with the tongue, Miss…. I don't really like your tone
You should know it’s not safe being on a track alone
Cause sunken souls can manage to paint more than dreams haunted
…and I made them all scream just because I wanted

You were daunted by voices but you wasn’t really hearing much
Just like Benny, craving praise but it was more than his dreams that was being crushed
They pumped you up with dopamine so you can reach the top unrivaled
But as each of the vessels break she just repeats another cycle

Search for your child, cause you were cursed with denial
And blew up your Biggest Fan and now it hurts just to smile
But as each day passes you are slowly forgotten
As a new Queen spreads her wings and you are what you tried stopping

The Dragonfly said to be a savior once birthed
But is more a mosquito sucking the life outta Blood Earth
So you can waste your days and continue to wander around
But if you wanna topple more catacombs I can help you underground

Psychopomp:
Sure that’d Be Nice to insight your torturous wreck
But I don't wanna take a ride on the Bi-Polar Express
Made more go missing cause when you were it wasn't brought to attention
Took a crack for a midnight snack cause you were starved for affection

But hadn’t managed to be fed, I’ll bash a hammer ‘gainst your head
And leave you swimming with the sharks until the fish finally rest
While I’m walking to Earth's center through the Mariana Trench
You ripped the souls out of their bodies ‘til they tore your own to shreds

Subway Midnight:
Starved… Like the Thraits at the bottom left rotting
Cause now it seems The Caldmen Four are the only ones watching 
So as you blossom know I left Rose to decay
Cause I kill Vermin Dogs that lead you astray

And you were let off your leash but you could barely manage
Cause you were down in the basement and couldn't do any damage
So don’t panic Vishneri, it's time we got off
Smile for the camera, this will be your final stop


[SCRAPPED] Subway Midnight vs Psychopomp - Rap Battle! (ft. Near & garbageGothic)

Puss in Boots

Fear me if you dare I’m Puss in Boots! 

I'm a versatile cat, you're a loosey goose!

I'm a living legend, I faced down death!

You're a fat house pet, who puts John in debt.


If you've come for a bounty, you won’t leave alive 

Like your ratings when movie reviews took a dive

I see no need to continue, let me drink my leche

Antes de que me convierta en tu muerte


Garfield 

Zzzzzz(snoring) oh is it my turn to rap?

Against a cat, who doesn’t even have the claws to scratch(Puss in Boots-Prrrrr)

Your a Has-been legend time to hang up those boots 

You got 9 lives? More like 9 bad reboots


You got ditched like your marriage when you got softpaws

Then scratched up an ogre ordered by his father in law

You scrambled your friendships now, who's the bad egg?

Now If you think I’m all ears than I’m straight up death 


Puss in Boots

Me sorprende que tu hambre de victoria es poca 

La historia del gato con diabetes contra el gato con botas 

Yo soy peligroso, tus ataques no me dañan , 

me robé el escenario, tu te atragantas con lasaña 


Garfield

Zzzzz OH! We’re still going?

Let me switch my flow just how switched with a donkey

Joined three diablos that was a no no

And this why…..why um zzzzzzzzz (Puss in boots

!Ay, Díos mío!)

https://youtu.be/GXZBEKUHQiI?si=faUz8EWxXcLaKwSf


Puss in Boots-Cyancoat

Garfield-Thanosquack

Writing-Aj,We think

Mixing-Jort

Demo-Captain Jorge

Beat-Andrey Rossi



Puss In Boots vs. Garfield- Quick Rap Battles (Ft.CyanCoat, ThanosQuack)

prod by SAINT-DROP

than

I’ve conquered galaxies
Stars and planets kneel before my massive fleets
All is grasped between my palms so Ganon’s region is not worth vanquishing
You’re called calamity incarnate? That’s the name they oughta had for me
Cause if you reincarnate, then this body’s guaranteed

Your power’s so finite
Only spanning three timelines
You’ve been a bore in my eyes
And I don’t mean the swine kind
You’d die twice when you and a child fight
But I’ll help rewind time
You then got a fresh start when you met your demise like

You hide in fortresses til a half-pint warrior kills ya
Just a sitting duck when you have no Courage and Wisdom
You’ve only ever had Power, cause when it’s in my hands
You’ll end up just as empty and barren as your own desert land

gan

Pity… for an Eternal, you’ve no eternal youth
I get purple too, but only when I look at you
Horrid creature, being born a leader is what I’m suited to
It’s my birthright, something that you couldn’t do

Girlfriend’s a skull head, I’d say he’s just as dense
Cause this weak man can’t see that he’s slave to all her whims
So much cowardice that now his own face has gotten split
Cause you’re an ace at being able to take it on the chin

You can’t conquer - any star that you find
When Nebula’s your daughter - and you’d toss her aside
And you nearly ruled the cosmos - but you thought your - artifact died
So go on and have mine, for YOU just seem to LOSE power all of the time

than

(*thanos gets the power triforce and uses it to complete the infinity gauntlet*)

You just made a mistake. A grave one.
The Cosmic Cube then or your Triforce now won’t shape up
So cough up your armies and squadrons
Ironic, I slaughter your gauntlet of bosses with a gauntlet

(*thanos starts fuckin, bashing shit round hyrule with the gauntlet*)

With how you store your currency
You can’t afford my mercy
When your rainbow shards are scattered far and they get lost in random pots until a boy goes burgling
In the homes he lurks in
So I’ll show him what a REAL home invasion’s got

All of your goblins and Lizalfos’ get chopped to death 
And it’s obvious to me that any sort of Guardians aren’t a threat
You’re a lunatic, your planned purge was flooding the damn Earth?
I’ll do Hyrule a favour and snap - before you snap first

(*thanos snaps*)

gan

I applaud and laugh! You left my army halved!
But they’re only there to ensure I get a proper match
You really dare to split me in two? You’ll see me halved then…
Cause now you’re talking to GANON

(*ganondorf kinda just doesnt care and turns ganon*)

Some rodent left your MASSIVE ASS FLAT
So if you’ve mastered betrayal, you’re better AS A DAMN RAT 
I’m the only person that you CANNOT BACKSTAB
Cause you’re no rival, I’ve a dark side THAT YOU CAN’T MATCH

But Thanos, know I’m thankful for the crafts and forces that you’ve brought
For after your defeat, your men will fall under my grand control
To have the stars and beyond is a chance I hold
But first I now command you all to bow before Ganondorf, your brand new lord

(*ganon takes control of thanos’ fleet and goes on a big space adventure :3*)


hi! welcome back to a new different version of rosenthal battles where i sort of just dont give a shit about anything past the demo stage because i cba!

this specific battle was inspired by this one battle rapper named jey the nitewing, who is like the definition of aura, so i wanted to write a battle that sorta encapsulates the mad king energy. some other battlers that inspired this writing were dizaster and real sikh on ganon’s side, but this is mainly inspired by jey in general.

for this battle i wanted to focus on setting a tone of like “you dont fuck around w these guys” and the substance of the disses sorta suffered from that, but ermm i kinda uhh dont care lole. hopefully i was able to deliver what i wanted thru the writing and performance, but im just glad knowing that i was able to pay good tribute to the mad fucking king 👑

Thanos VS Ganondorf - Scrapped Battles of Whatever

Leo Barqui as Slither Wing
Chaotic Rap Battles as Liver King
Written by TheNauticalClaydol, Jacobrl99, Nugget
Beat by VANNN.
Mixed by SIR Rap Battles

Slither Wing:
It looks like I’ll be the one to make a First Impression
I'm bringing this fight to the Stone Age you’re obsessed with
Like your veins popping out, you’ll feel surface tension
When I bury this neanderthal, strengthen his Earth connection!
But given your diet, I’m sure you’ve met with my kind
Since you’re prone to catching stomach Bugs with every Bite (Hiss!)
But if you think this moth's dinner, you picked the wrong critter
I’ll cut a King down to size, now that’s a Chopped Liver!
Bulking Up on steroid dependence?
This phony King would only earn a crown if he went to the dentist!
Kept up the Facade, still filling yourself with toxins
Now you’re only influencing lawsuits with those Concoctions!

Liver King:
Wow, I thought I was the one who didn’t cook!
Now the King will bring the Strength to your Struggle, so listen good!
I’m chiseled by the gods, while this bug is punching soft!
My raps are like the way I eat my meat: BLOODY RAW!
You look like a beta design, I’m on my sigma shit! (LIFT!)
When we duel on a beat, you're just Wingin’ it!
Think I’ll take those disses, bitch? You’ll Quiver when I’m bringin’ it!
Eat you like a Chicken Wing and spit you in my kitchen sink!
Wanna talk about supplements? There’s no remedy
For how worthless you are if you don’t carry Booster Energy!
I’m the Fitness guru that you shouldn’t have Crossed!
I take life by the horns, and bite the bull by the BALLS! (CREATINE!)

Slither Wing:
Pumping iron to show mettle, but you’ve drawn my ire
With those lines from a time before man discovered fire
It’s clear from your ‘apology’ that you speak hollow words
Whenever you step up to the plate, you nauseate your followers!
This bald fraud should make like his channel and wash up!
Dirty-bearded spearfisher: Jason Chemo-moa!
And we know your Tempers Flare from all the ‘roids in your putrid blood
So when I put you on ice, perhaps you’ll keep your cool for once

Liver King:
Put me on ice? Buddy, I think you forget:
Between the two of us, who survived an extinction event?! (GAINS!)
But maybe I’ll take notes on your world, you've got some strong guys
Like the Koraidon that showed Sada some real Assault Bikes!
You’re pudgy as fuck! Could you be any frickin’ lazier?!
Walk a day in my shoes, and you’d be the Liver Failure!
This battle ends with moth being served, right off the cutting board!
But if you ever want a piece of me, I’m always hungry for MOOOOOAR!!

Slither Wing vs Liver King - RAP BATTLE

hi

Beat produced by Surce
Mixed by Dr. Dee
Written by Worms

ColeTheCole as Bigfoot
Dr. Dee as Luigi

Lyrics:

Bigfoot:
You'll find, in my countryside, nothing that you were coached for
So run and hide from this fucking icon of gaming folklore 
Crept ‘round the code since 04, they cut you out day zero
Couldn't even take second place when your brother's still the hero?
Leaving hunters screaming crazy when stepped up to seek and maim me
I'll prove stereotypes right when I eat up this weakling baby
But maybe you'd fit my diet, this fruit just shoots and blows up?
Eternal star’s fried, gassed up then died, supernova
Don't throw a clue in the direction of a load of stupid youths that are all betting 
That you'll show up, new; so duped then get all petty when they do it all over again for Waluigi
And I'm feeling greedy, take that bounty on your head and
You don't gotta haul your vacuum to come suck on this legend 
When ya step into my damn den, you better hit up all your pen pals
To write a reply letter on how Luigi's fucking dead now

Luigi:
It's pareidolic, kid, if you see plays where you're winning this
When my plaques text is clearer than your countless glitching clips
Perhaps you should get CJ to relay ya some steep pay 
Just to rank up enough gold to summon this king (aye!)
I get introversion, but it likely got in the way
When your whole species decayed cuz you couldn't quickly get laid
I'm not entertained, and while I'm used to savin’ strays in paintings 
Can't say if jpegs in Photoshop equate to the same thing 
So call up Leatherface to mask the shame of coming second place
To a better gaming fable on the net and it's
Quite insane the only footprint you left in your game
Was a runaway furry fetishist 
You're tripping Peyotes if you think that you're beating me, Beast 
Dropping bombs like I was removed from GTA 3
But I don't need to blast a bus of your believers ,
To see in your debug you're completely a cheat!
So id stay back in your cabin if we wanna talk leaks; you're delisted while they breached to spot me
No chance on a plan on restarting his populace, devs tossed this freak long before his Hot Coffee 
Ain't got me feeling shaken by the edges of your polygons
I've been left more quaking by hulking apes from even Donkey Kong

Bigfoot:
Hang yourself in my shadow cuz everybody's forgetting ya
No wonder you were cut out because they ran out of memory
It's a goose chase of racing endless laps around your statue
A coin flip in your fountain ain't a wish big enough to add you
Like with Wario, they begged for; now you're obscured by his apparitions
Wide and far they stretched truths for a glimpse of hope you weren't omitted 
This shit isn't Double Dash, your L ain't capped on backwards 
Smoking your ass like Backwoods in the depths of my back woods

Luigi:
Nobody's impressed by those lines or your tears 
You weren't even the focus when you finally appeared 
Call me Dr. Luigi, how I'm curing this mass hysteria
Keep you hiding on Chiliad, no more sightings are flaring up (hahahaha)

Bigfoot In San Andreas vs. L Is Real 2401 - Rap Battle #1

Written by King Ducky
Mixed By Jort
Art by Grasman & Tompuffs
Chiselled by Raisu
Cover by SPM
Writing help by Futurefilmmaker, Forgottenson & Supergamerbro
Prod. Epistra & Glitchdude

Spinel (Langlelee):
Well Well Well…
High time I slice a runner up when like a gate I shut her up 
Leave a bummer crunched till theres nothing but Charlotte's guts
Ya just a Bendy clone that can bend who decides to side with violence 
Only stuck with kids on the web by swiping my schtick! 

Wooh!…It’s quite the stretch to think violence can
Solve your fights as when you tried and ran at a guy when manic 
You died in a panic and winded up diced because you got tied in the end
Got caught right in a grind machine like a Fly In A Web! 

The fight got in-tense, her upper half snapped like a rubber band!
Much like her stubborn head when the only ones that loved her left
This mother lives below their land and still can't understaaaaand!
That kids can have Other Friends…

Only finds a match in a mindless transcript or the fine dust gathers of grime attached to
This spider's massive vibrant plastic albeit doll she is tightly yanked up by a hand! And
I can't stand tantrums bout being abandoned. I sat in a garden for years unattended! 
The Garten your fans have all cheered for is Banban, Windows you stick to aren't smeared up like that rep!

Mommy Long Legs (TheLoneSporano):
Your laughable tramp design's as scratched as a stone you're shackled to 
I rap as well as the vines lapped scant around your ankles do! 
A broken rubber hose, no one wants blobs of pouts you've slobbered out
The teardrops you've bawled out would toss me down the water spout!

Bonzo Bunny(GreenOwl)
Tried to right the wrongs when your fight had stopped (augh!)

Mommy Long Legs
Still, you’re reliant on Diamond palms
And now…

Mini Wuggies(GnomeYT, Elizikin, Fulmon)
Diamonds have good laughs at the pain you had felt
Why that track would have had them drifting away too, Spindel…

Pug-A-Pillar (Danii):
I’m troublesome but tons of fun, you do what master asks while
Like trusted pugs, you sat dormant- a doormat you’re stamped down!
Who feuded to become used anew to be lost once the movie dropped?

Mommy Long Legs:
Why bubble gum! You blew up then were spat out!

Spinel:
Would ya really like knowing the blunt truth?
No youth in their right mind would touch you!
Life was an on loop broadcast of this abuse
Even one, two of your death scenes were unused!

My injector launched on Roses homeland,  
Dropping with less flaws than project playtime 
God its toxins can’t cross with 
When heads called the shots in Paynes life!
The same kids ya trained, played with, loved
Stay caged because you, obeyed Greybers law
Then wail blaming them?! Paynes taking the Game Stations top Played Plaything!

But… you’re no deadbeat mom
I don’t want to grind your gears but that’s an mcs job
Although we both had our backstories render past hurts
At least I got my happily ever after

TV:
Mommy Long Legs!/ BrAnd NEw /with/ tunes n' beats
Unlike/ BOnZo!/ And!/ Spinel…/who?/ are TwO!/Clingy!
(*ooooh)/ YOU!/ were in/ quite the/ sticky situation 
Even those/ sHOeS/ we're in a!/ sticky situation 
Don’t whine/ over Stevens/ speech of peace
InSTEAD…/ repeat this scene on the tv!
Say did she lie/ Did SHe?

Mommy Long Legs:
Playing HIDE… AND… SEEK?

TEN!
I'll thrash you through dust, the best you could do is mood-swinging!
NINE!
I'll drag you through the mud so let's view the slew which you bring in

EIGHT!
Quite an uptight gal, want to talk unused when you might have been cut right out?
SEVEN!
Then subside down on a dime when it got cried out almost like the gems upside down

SIX!
Thousand years clinging onto a dead memory singing songs: an obsessed melody!
FIVE! 
Pity Pot had the best weaponry which she lost!

FOUR
Ment for staging mentors plaything yet your temper stained it 
THREE
 You’re never making ever-fated entertainment!

TWO! Pedals withers, love is forced, oh how you lose
She has come up short, no wonder Rose outgrew you…

Spinel vs. Mommy Long Legs - Royal Rap Battle! [ft. Langlelee & TheLoneSporano]

Stofferex as Nostalgia Critic
??? as Anthony Fantano / Cal Chuchesta

Nooby as Tyler, the Creator
Pixel Chris as Eminem
Danii as Drake

Beat Produced by: 2Deep
Written by: Danii
Mixed and Mastered by: Danii

Lyrics:

Nostalgia:
Hello
I’m the Nostalgia Critic, I touch myself so you don’t have to
If you’re the world’s greatest critic, I might just have to slap you
Known for shitty takes that make me wanna cut your access
Your fans lost approval so you get it from your black ex
You’d rather suck off Death Grips longer ‘fore you battle me at all
‘Cause I could also get big from screaming and throwing glass at walls

Get get get get
Got got got got
Blood rush to my
Head lit hot lock
Poppin' off the
Fuckin' block knot
Clockin' wrist slit
Watch bent thought bot
AHHHHHHHH!!!!

No wonder you’re Melonhead! No one eats your seed
Arguing with kids ‘bout politics sounds pretty uncool to me
Anthony, you’re not foolin’ me! Climbing up to me is one more boulder
‘Cause your career already died when you put away VULTURES

Anthony:
Hi everyone, nostalgthany critictano, the busiest music nerd
I just had to listen to Doug spew a verse
It’s pretty clear that with his lack of humor comes with a lack of bars too
I’d be glad to front, let’s argue
Doug has this thing where he makes false accusations in references
For..humor? Superiority? I’m not getting this
With lines like “your takes want me to cut off your access
Your fans lost approval so you get it from your black ex”
He bit off more than he can chew, I guess, I just think he’s lame
He’s rocking teeth that look like my flannels, while I’ve the best teeth in the game
If you make CinemaSins 40 minutes and unfunny
Then you’re basically getting slightly a better experience than his-

Nostalgia:
Is he gonna refer to me like I’m not even fucking here the whole time?

Alright, nerd, I think I see the issues
‘Cause I don’t know what made you cry harder; Mac Miller or your sound being used?
I’m not who you argue with on stream, but your points, I won’t listen
Fuck you, rap battle, I wish I could be big in music if I study..
Journalism? This man’s a fucking fake
He should make like when he does grow hair and run away
You’re a fearmongering, topster-glazing, nazi loving asshole!
And now I’ll bring my friends in so they run the fade

Tyler, the Creator:
Your disses are trash, regardless of listens

Nostalgia:
Well, I meant my friends back at-

*Tyler gets shot*

Eminem:
Tell me how you’re gonna give us bad ratings when you gave all the shitty albums a 10 and I can’t stand you Anthony

Nostalgia:
Alright, this is-

*Eminem gets shot*

Drake:
Anthony, your disses are a light zero…..

Nostalgia:
What, the pedophile doesn’t shot?-

*Drake gets shot*

Nostalgia:
Who the fuck has my gun?

Cal:
Yeah!

Anthony:
Hey, put that back

Cal:
No!

Anthony:
Uh, okay
It appears even after Wall, you have nothing to say
With the same flows, same jokes, same lines that suck chodes
And never been on fire since “I was frozen today!”
The inconsistency in this one is abysmal
Since his verses was so cancer, he got main character syndrome
Maybe he should’ve retired back in 2012 for better
And I’m giving this a light to strong 3 on this record, tran
sition


{SCRAPPED DEMO} Nostalgia Critic vs. Anthony Fantano

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