its loud in my head •_•

https://linktr.ee/Rivilin

you said no yeah I don’t want to see you
well that’s fair yeah I get that I am being used
cut-up fucked up on the inside
im scared to death cus I thought you’d be right by my side

black eyes staring straight through my skin
I can see the transparency within
it’s like I wasn’t even there no no no
sometimes the pictures that you took showed me I could disappear

I fucked up wading down the hospital isle
you said forget about me, I begged to stay for a while
so wrap your arms, wrap your arms just around me
turn to stone, lose control push away and be alone

I know you hoped i suffered I know your with another
cus hating me was your favorite past time
I know you break and stutter your minds fucked take another
another pill just to help you forget my name

my bones are now disordered kick down the glass now cornered
crawling out on my stomach just to feel more pain
dialed up you never answered, you left me here abandoned
could it be that this isn’t love

you said no yeah I don’t want to see you
well that’s fair yeah I get that I am being used
cut-up fucked up on the inside
im scared to death cus I thought you’d be right by my side

hospital beds, I see my mother give a smile
she'll hold my hand as I push myself into denial
you could have been there even as a fucking friend
I hate myself cus I couldn’t hate you when you left

broken knuckles hit the wall pain it shudders through my core
it’s not the type of pain that relates to my hand being broke
drive me to the hospital screaming at me all along
sorry im not perfect, im not worth it, I just really try my best

not to be too much, to fucked up
it’s hard to cope when you say it’s just all  in my head
cus our loves a messy masterpiece were both fucked up and on our knees
begging for a drug just to take away the fucking pain

Weathercast

https://linktr.ee/Rivilin

it’s not fair that I see your smile, your right there
unconditional love always giving always care
you were right beside me you never left you always stayed
with your two big brown eyes yeah you gave a grin and

layed your head down on my sheets yeah
push the pain down yeah I weep
you didn’t know what was happening or what was going on
if I could just sacrifice myself for you, you’d know id do it all along

demons climbing up on you, no you can cope yeah you just falter
wading through the dark abyss, i see your eyes and now their broken
you don’t got no strength left in your legs so ill just pick you up and
drag you out until we reach a god who can explain this situation

see the bones start to stick out of your flesh, medicated, losing weight but
always have a smile on your mind you know that is hard to face this
watch my brothers fill with concern as your losing balance changing
into something that we don’t recognize anymore, its not fair

tell them it gets better, it won’t
perspective of this change is a joke
foggy grey blank mind is my world
the change wont come if I stay here alone

lacerations in my head hurt
dependency on drugs make me lurk
losing a best friend feels like shit
I lay my soul in the dirt

im sick of watching our loved ones fucking leave
what does god want id give up fucking everything
just to make the one I love stay 
before it’s my time to leave

you better make sure they’re all their afterlife
I don’t care if it’s in hell i’ll make sure im there in time
Just to see a smile on their face,
to make sure we are alright

Luminous

@rivilin

Lyrics

Were sick of being just used by the ones that we love
Wont you say a quick pray and give our souls to the wind
So light a match in the dark and reach a hand out to me
Losing grip over time this god gave up easily

A drug fucked mess at the alter, no your prays no they don't, don't deceive me
I'm feeling sick from all this pressure, from the ones who say they care
I watched my family be abandoned by the church who said they'd be their
Even my family that my mother used to love, abandoned her when she was in need

I'm sick of being betrayed by a lover, so disgusted am I
I've became resilient to the affection that they deny through their eyes
Where were you when my mother needed help and my brother was so suicidal back then
I was just a kid trying to keep this family together but it wasn't enough

Tainted my blood with some DNA chains
Addiction runs in me genetical fate

My blood is so tainted
I can't help to crave it
I'm drowning in vomit when I be awakened

Abusing myself and I keep coming back
Sophia I'm sorry I left in a flash
I promise I miss you but shit I got issues
I'm trapped in this cycle of booze with a screw loose

I feel like everyday's the same
I say it every song cuz I mean what I say, aye
Like I'm tryna the face pain
But when its coming in the same wave, everyday
I feel just crushed by weight
Its hard to fucking stand up let alone feel okay
I know I feel disdain
At my own life so I fight it every day

I miss your face
The excited gaze
These autumn leaves, ain't feel the same

I lost it all
I gave it up
For a dream, no regrets, but fuck it sucks

I make mistakes
I feel the pain
Associated with me to blame

My life is fucked
Deep rooted mud
God gave it up, and I had enough

Were sick of being just used by the ones that we love
Wont you say a quick pray and give our souls to the wind
So light a match in the dark and reach a hand out to me
Losing grip over time this god gave up easily

Sophia

⸸ spotify ⸸

$LOTHBOI x Rivilin - Sophia

**https://open.spotify.com/artist/6TCjV733jXn7lpc01TkIbV

**https://twitter.com/vyok_v

**https://www.instagram.com/vyok_/


Lyrics:


I, pick myself up

Lose myself cause

I live in irony

Talk too much but...

I feel anxiety

I feel fucked up


What is it you're telling me?

I am not a fan of it

Spoke to the devil and he told me he's not having it

Insanity.

Did it all again and I'm not getting it.



Solopsism slipping in my conscience

Can't feel the endorphins

Get sidetracked into the boredom



I was in the elevator

stare at my reflection

glass broke into shards

began to say my confessions

the lights went dim

I felt the evil in his presence

distorted frequencies

I see him peak in through the crevice.



He asked me for my name and I just stood still

elevator purgatory

I was never fulfilled

Touching my blade, thinking If I'm a person who could kill

It's an option on my list only used for good will


He told me we're not going anywhere without request

my eyes rolled back I had to puff my chest

I could hear them saying my name but I couldn't respond

this elevator trip was lasting way too long.


Now I'm talking to myself

when I'm fucking my health.

and I'm not getting the help

can I really call this wealth?




I say it's not affecting me,

when I got no one next to me

am I being honest

If the devils who's protecting me? 



Puts his hands on my shoulders,

As the elevator goes up,

Make no stops on any floors from 01

The door opens, I never saw the sight of no one.

How can I create and live a life with no love?

VyOk - Elevator (Prod.DISBL1ND x INFELIX)

ART BY SUICIDALGALLERY
https://www.instagram.com/suicidalgallery/

LYRICS:

the way you stare it burns
what's left of me I never learn
hells jaws below consume
the way you smile makes me return

yeah call me a waste of space
Yeah say im not worth your time
yeah hiding behind a lie
watch my mental state decline

yeah watch as I withdraw
tell me how do I repair a broken core
I try to explain but you ignore
I fall further than before

yeah crumbling on myself
thought I could trust someone again
no, it's a lie yeah you were right
suicide will fix my head

no im not fine take some more drugs
didnt think id be alone
inside are breaking everything is shaking
everyone I loved is gone

saying you care, but you just share all your moments yeah with him
breaking apart, wish on a star didnt think I’d lose a friend
you want to go behind my back and break my trust again and again
didnt think I’d lose my hope in  being alive but now I wish for death

isn't it crazy how you can put everything into someone you love
but you know that you're never enough, numbing the pain out with the drugs
watch the skin start to peel and flake, the person I love is the one I hate
I should of crossed off I shouldn't let you in, I know that was just a mistake

Tired

ART BY SUICIDALGALLERY
https://www.instagram.com/suicidalgallery/

LYRICS:

I see you crawling up to me on your knees
I see the rage building up in your eyes as I leave
it's like when I open my mouth reality stops and I can't control what I see
my body isn't mine now another person takes control when my mind breaks down

bursts of anger seem to cloud up my vision then my mind snaps back, hands covered in blisters 
now every day repeats in the same cycle, just stuck in a fog and I can let go of
who I was who I am who I could been, I can't live with the way that you just look at me
self-disgust builds a tiny little home right next to the place that I used to call my soul

what was I meant to say, how was I meant to react that way
a best friend confined, I wished he was dead I wish he never survived
the night I broke his face all the anger consumed and replaced 
I never came back alive the person I was, was the one who lost sight
 
yeah, emotions are boiling under my flesh, 
feel the stress rising up through my gut until nothing’s left
cus it's eating out the best of me, I tried to make you never see what's wrong with me
And even when I needed you, yeah you said that you gotta leave

Yeah so isn't that perfect I get it now, 
I search for something in places that won't be found
and then you find someone who builds a little cage inside your chest
where they change you and tear you down, find you gasping for your breath

and it doesn't help that best friends wanna, fuck with you
thought they had my fucking back guess im just easily used
I wanna fuck em with the gat blood splatters soak into shoes
Damn I guess it's what I lack, the courage to speak my truth

so I say it in these songs, yeah I fucking hate you
if I saw you in public I think id have to break a tooth or two
but self disgusts builds a tiny little home
where I find myself embracing the guilt all alone

Burn Notice

Darth Rose:
Insta - www.instagram.com/real.darth.rose/
YouTube - www.youtube.com/channel/UCiyDQmFkkDKy...
Twitter - twitter.com/DarthRose3
My Discord - darthrose
linktree - linktr.ee/DarthRose

Producer :
youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@lilportal
Insta - https://www.instagram.com/prod.lilportal/

cover art:
Insta - https://www.instagram.com/venusminui/

Lyrics :
I feel like I'm falling apart
my homie mixing codeine with sprite now
is this another night of getting fucked up 
please save me now
 
yeah

but my friend keep on hittin your dm
like he next in line
wish you gave me more time yeah
its not worth it in the end 
I will save myself 
you're not worth the pain
 
was it worth all the time 
and all the money I spent  
all the feelings inside I kept deep within
I just don't know If I could relive this shit over again  
but I guess Its better this way
 
I hope that he will buy you what I couldn't affoard 
and I hope he treats better then I could I guess
but my mind is a dark place I thought I could escape
with you by my side everything felt okay

It's bold of me to think you could change 
putting poison in my veins I hope it all goes away
I hope It goes down the drain 
like all the feelings I ever had for you
oh yeah yeah yeah

inside my mind, it's like I'm frozen in time 
and I can't seem to feel a thing 
(bitch I can't feel a thing)
I guess I'm fine doing line after line
will my mind be alright
guess Ill sleep on this shit again

but my friend keep on hittin your dm
like he next in line
wish you gave me more time yeah
its not worth it in the end 
I will save myself 
you're not worth the pain

I hope that he will buy you what I couldn't affoard 
and I hope he treats better then I could I guess
but my mind is a dark place I thought I could escape
with you by my side everything felt okay

It's bold of me to think you could change 
putting poison in my veins I hope it all goes away
I hope It goes down the drain 
like all the feelings I ever had for you
oh yeah yeah yeah

Save Me [prod.lilportal]

Running

Prod, ARQ
🖤pyrrhic🖤
@dearpyrrhic
☠️www.instagram.com/dearpyrrhic/
lyrics:
Runnin' into your forest fire
Walkin' onto your razor wire
I swear I'm fine but I'm alive

I'mma kill myself leave a pretty body up inside the grave
Now, it might be in a year or it might be here today
Tell my momma not to cry, put my body on display
'Cause the roses look pretty when they die and wilt away
Light me at both ends and watch me disappear into the smoke
Why you kickin' at my chair when I'm not finished tyin' rope
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs

If I spilled my heart, and it landed up on the carpet
Come on tell me baby girl would you pick it up, would you stomp it
'Cause I'm really not the one to ever go and get nauseous
But all these feelin's in my stomach make me wanna vomit, vomit
Say you hit rock bottom and you drownin' in your stress
I'm throwin' you a shovel I'll show you how deep it gets
When yo life is on the line and yo body no longer listens to you
To you

Don't tell me you ain't done enough
Don't tell me you ain't man enough
I feel like we don't talk enough
I feel like we don't "fuck it, fuck it"
Cry enough
I feel like we don't laugh enough
I feel like we don't matter much
I feel like we don't "Fuck it"

Runnin' into your forest fire
Walkin' onto your razor wire
I swear I'm fine but I'm alive

I'mma kill myself leave a pretty body up inside the grave
Now, it might be in a year or it might be here today
Tell my momma not to cry, put my body on display
'Cause the roses look pretty when they die and wilt away

Hold steady don't waste your time
There's nothin' between these lines
If ever I'm feelin' short
I know that my dealer's blind
How many levels of gray
Does it take to shade the pain?

The crack of my skin
Pale of your bones
All that I lack
Is nothin' you hold
Hide your keepsakes
It's all that you'll have
When you meet...

Old medicine inside my desk that don't remember me
Workin' for a life that is best, I fill your every need
Cherish the knife inside my back that you have given me
Stop cryin' baby boy

I'mma kill myself leave a pretty body up inside the grave
Now, it might be in a year or it might be here today
Tell my momma not to cry, put my body on display
'Cause the roses look pretty when they die and wilt away
Light me at both ends and watch me disappear into the smoke
Why you kickin' at my chair when I'm not finished tyin' rope
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs
I'mma tell you when it's time, I'mma show you all the signs

I'm Still Alive

All Bark No Bite(Prod. _Rayday)

Mirrors

Metrics of Motive: The Architecture of Narrative Truth 4.0, is a lyric that — stripped to its strategic essence outlines the following:
🧠 Narrative Summary
The lyric exposes how numbers, models, and historical accounts are never neutral. It maps a journey through:
Statistical deception: Every figure is shaped by motive — from measurement error to model bias, but more critically by the intent of the architect behind it.
Curated memory: Historians don’t just report; they select, omit, and frame. The past is reconstructed to serve present agendas.
Scientific scaffolding: Truth is provisional. Popper and Feyerabend echo through the suite, reminding us that science is built on assumptions, not absolutes.
Policy distortion: Metrics are deployed to justify decisions, mask injustice, and silence dissent — especially in economic and humanitarian contexts.
Epistemic audit: The lyric becomes a ciphered manifesto, urging listeners to interrogate every graph, every stat, every “objective” claim.
It’s not a song — it’s a strategic dissection of how truth is architected, weaponized, and sold.

Metrics of Motive - The Architecture 4.0 #Hip Hop Cipher Rap

Gustav Ahr's Album

giving girls cocaine w/ lil tracy (prod. horsehead)

Smells Like Teen Spirit | Bass Boosted Remix

Lil Peep - R.O.O.T (Peep only)

heavy self-loathing fuckboy vibes ☠️😭🔥

Listen on Spotify

Daydream

Self produced / Sad  

CONTACT: RIVILINAU@GMAIL.COM

Luminous

Rivilin

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IDLEGLANCE

AMV brother

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