DOZE GOD

lyrics:
need to get better, but i know i won’t
so i trap myself here all alone
in some place where all i see is thoughts
i can’t even recall the moment i got lost

i say that i’ll get, i say i’ll get better and

say i’ll get better, i don’t think i can
i can’t be who i want when i hate who i am
need to get better, but i know i won’t
i trap myself in silence where i’m all alone
as i watch the time go, it’s just me and my thoughts
i can’t even recall the moment i got lost

say i’ll get better, i don’t think i can
i can’t be who i want when i hate who i am

diffidence | prod. neverforever

patience patience
i dont got no patience
i dont got no friends i just work out in my basement
waitin waitin
all this time im wastin
chug another bottle
chug another just to chase it
fuck another model
fuck another cuz im wasted
drownin in my sorrow 
i dont think im gonna make it
stackin up my problems
knock em down cuz i cant take it
i dont wanna solve em 
i just really wanna lay back down

im upset
im upset cuz i dont got no one around
shawty say she down for me
yeah she said baby keep the noise down for me
turn that frown upside down for me
me and my lil baby we got history

first you love me now fuck me
you could say im lucky
but frankly id say that you hate me
i need me some
 
patience patience
i dont got no patience
i dont got no friends i just work out in my basement
i dated this girl and i swear that she was satan
i lost all my brothers now im lonely in my 
wraith yeah
not a lot of money goin in my piggy bank yeah
not a lot of joy feelin in my fuckin brain yeah
not a lot of love not a lot of love

i need patience patience
i dont got no patience
i dont got no friends i just work out in my basement
waitin waitin
all this time im wastin
chug another bottle
chug another just to chase it

patience patience
not a lot of patience
patience patience
not a lot of patience

wait (branwen)

Im stuck in a pit I cant get out Theres no escaping it
My mind filled with doubts I scream and shout To try and cope with this
Noone hears me out Skys filled with clouds Theyre all grey and shit
sun wont show itself I need the help Or im not making it

Nobody cared for me when I needed something
So why should i give you my presence ill leave you rotting x2

Im stuck in a pit I cant get out Theres no escaping it
My mind filled with doubts I scream and shout To try and cope with this
Noone hears me out Skys filled with clouds Theyre all grey and shit
sun wont show itself I need the help Or im not making it
At this rate ill rot in hell Dont need your help Im chasing it
Did it by myself And im so proud No im not faking this
Much blood spilled It casts a spell Motivation i cant quit
Im sorry the truths hard to tell When im not complacent with
My place on this earth im too complaisant in

Nobody cared for me when I needed something
So why should i give you my presence ill leave you rotting 
prod. bowsa

eternal fog

Produced by jeweler

Lyrics

I wanna paint all my white walls red
I know you love me, I don't care what you said
I'll always love you, I don't care what you did

You went away, I can't get you back
Fuck moving on, I miss what we had
Out of my mind but you're in my head

I got some evil inside my soul
Don't even ask, I won't let you know
I don't know why I can't let you go

I can't get out, I been stuck in a loop
I need some help, I don't know what to do
You don't see me but I'm noticing you

I wanna cry but my tears all gone
I'm alone, I ain't got no one
Don't say that you cared when I'm dead and long gone
I give in man, this shit ain't fun

I give in man, this shit ain't it
Know I don't need it but I want a sip
I seen it coming, I ain't even gone trip
I just wanna go back but I can't even flip

I wanna paint all my white walls red
I know you love me, I don't care what you said
I'll always love you, I don't care what you did

You went away, I can't get you back
Fuck moving on, I miss what we had
Out of my mind but you're in my head

I got some evil inside my soul
Don't even ask, I won't let you know
I don't know why I can't let you go

I can't get out, I been stuck in a loop
I need some help, I don't know what to do
You don't see me but I'm noticing you

white walls.

Produced by kinderyessir & viannoo

Lyrics

*auditory agony*

Please come back, can you hold my hand?
I don't know where I'm at, I don't know where I am
I'm on a plane that's all out of gas and I'm over an ocean, don't know where to land
I wanna change, I don't know if I can
I ain't got nothing left, you were all that I had
I'm out of breath, gave it all I had
Wish I could care but I know I can't

Don't say you care when you can't tell me
Know I'm fucked but you can't help me
Don't waste yo time, you might as well leave
I ain't been fine since you ain't been with me

Already know how this go
So you just might as well go
You ain't gotta waste my time
And I don't really need to waste yours

Say that I don't but I need her
She say she love me but I don't believe her
I'm not a man, I'm a creature
I wear your skin but you shouldn't look deeper

You might see something you shouldn't
Gave it my all and I'm done
I don't make music for fun
And I don't make music for funds 

Please come back, can you hold my hand?
I don't really know where I am
I'm on a plane that's all out of gas
I don't really even know where to land
I wanna change, I don't know if I can
Nothing left, you were all that I had
I'm out of breath, gave it all I had
Wish I could care but I know I can't

I'm in a body but I'm not alive, I'm just tryna survive, I don't even know how to breathe
She don't care about me so don't even try
Even if you did, it wouldn't mean shit to me
Don't try to bring me back, I don't wanna
I'm fine where I'm at, I don't wanna go farther
I don't wanna get better, don't bother
I be telling myself don't call her

When I open my eyes, no color
You were supposed to be mine, no other
I got stuck in a loop, can’t recover
Heart full of scars that I never can cover

*auditory agony*

i stopped pretending this was music.

Lyrics

I been walking this earth for 25 years and I still feel lost
I'm fucking pitiful, I still don't know how to open up, sit here and talk to my thoughts
I kind of thought by now I would figure it out and I still ain't figured it
I know something that you don't know, I know something that I can not tell you about

All I can say is watch what I say, protect all of your ear and eye gates
Heard what I said, you can do what you will, it ain't my fault if you don't escape
And just know the farther you go, the farther it is to get back to your home
It still hurts inside my chest even if I don't let you know

I say inside of my chest cause I don't have a heart, that girl took it apart
Won't ever be put together again, won't be better again, to be hurt is my part
Space I'm wasting, I can't take this, fuck this life, I wake up and I hate it
Say I don't care but you know that I'm faking, know it's been years but your love I'm still chasing

If your love was a liquor, wouldn't chase it, your love is bitter, I still wanna taste it
Keeping these thoughts in the basement so I don't have to go down there and face it
If I face it I'd have to go end it and I just wanna keep on pretending
Cause that's all I have and that's all I will if you never come back

I been walking this earth for 25 years and I still feel lost
I'm fucking pitiful, I still don't know how to open up, sit here and talk to my thoughts
I kind of thought by now I would figure it out and I still ain't figured it
I know something that you don't know, I know something that I can not tell you about

All I can say is watch what I say, protect all of your ear and eye gates
Heard what I said, you can do what you will, it ain't my fault if you don't escape
And just know the farther you go, the farther it is to get back to your home
It still hurts inside my chest even if I don't let you know

Even if I don't let you know
Even if I don't let you go
Even if I don't let you see
Everything that you did to me
Even if I don't let you know
Even if I don't let you go

XXV. adorer.

my heart used to be beautiful now theres mold inside.

this song is completely non profit

Lyrics

I put myself on display out of pain
But it won't change the fact you don't know me at all
Said that I would but I still haven't changed
I'ma say that I will but I won't not at all

The person I was and the person I am and person I will be all understand
Nothing we do will have any effect, I was meant to be broken, it's part of the plan

I'm still a sad kid inside of an adult
Say that you care but you show that you don't
Say you'll be there but I know that you won't
Always knew that I'd somehow just end up alone

It's okay though, I've learned to accept it
I'm just a person that can't be accepted
I'm just a person that won't learn the lesson
Soon I won't see it when you send me a message

This isn't a song, it's the only thing right when I feel like I'm wrong
This mic is the only one that I can talk to when I'm out of place and I feel so alone
I don't really care if nobody hears, it never was for any ears
The shit that I'm saying is not what I'm saying
Most of you won't understand what I'm saying

I still kinda wish you were here
Part of me doesn't believe that you're gone
Part of me partially loves you whole heartedly
Pardon me if I don't make sense at all

Never made sense to begin with
Only right, won't make sense when I end it
I keep typing out texts and don't send it
I just wanted someone to be friends with

diffidence | prod. neverforever

sendetic