So self-empathy in compassionate connection, compassionate communication, is a radical, life serving and transformative evolutionary, deeply healing process we can learn, rather than judging and blaming, anger, criticism, blame and despair and the spiral down into despair, hopeless, or worked up into fury, frenzied anger and rage – all these are hallmarks of reactive elements withing us.  Self-empathy, empathy in presence.  Here we are learning to say hello and welcome reactive and habitual responses in ourselves, parts in ourselves which gives them a healing space, space to release, a space to breathe, not to be determined by them or hostage to them  We are back  to the pause as the first step, in a transaction with someone, in events, in our daily lives, in overwhelm for example. Just take time out, pause, drop down to where the feet meet the ground let things find their natural place in the universe, an organic natural settling, body in the body, hearing in the hearing, quite quickly we can come to our senses.  Then we can begin to notice, yes there is something down in my tummy, a clenching, settle, to allow an organic natural unfolding. Grounding will bring some degree of safety and containment. You can place your hand on your chest or tummy, sensing into what is there, something vague, intense, nebulous, we invite an intention and sense of gentleness, of softness, of compassion. We invite this warm awareness to flood around the parts, to offer support and care. And perhaps the part in you is ready for you to say hello, letting that part be the way it wants to be, we are very interested in full expression.  Coming alongside and sitting with in a gentle and warm accompaniment from the sensing body and saying hello in a gentle kindly and soft way. 

Compassionate communication invitation to entertain presence.  Presence being the foundation and centre and heart of compassionate communication – connection. Compassionate communication main premise is heart connection, not head connection, i.e. the one that judges analyses, compares and blames, criticises, abstractises. Coming from thinking directly, in general is disconnecting, it’s conceptual, it’s the narrative – its talking about experience that has been, probably and whilst useful at times, it’s not the heart of connection.  The heart of connection can be in silence, a silent empathic presence which we can offer to our inner worlds with compassion, care.  So, we just pause, resting in this moment, suspending as we invite a more sensory based experience to emerge, of course its already here in its fullness, but something may not be so available to this whole experience.  It can begin to emerge into its fullness by settling, and beginning to notice by softly noticing, softly including, like the sun rising on the horizon warming and illuminating with equality, nothing is left out.  Sensing the feet on the ground, sensing touching and contact, the settee or bed, or earth. Sensing softly and gently, warmly if you like as the body begins to sense itself more fully, radiating out and awareness into and beyond the room, out into the sky, into the milky ways, into the swirling infinite starry night with all the starlight beaming down touching our hearts. Making room for what is inside here, the inner Universe, this complexity, this mystery within. Approaching with compassion, softness, sensing what would like empathy or to be held to be supported and connected with. We approach with love and respect giving plenty of space, and closeness if appropriate.

The Heart of Connection and Sun Rising NVC Attunement

Presence Deep Rest Meditations and Reflections inspired by Focusing, Mindfulness and Nonviolent communication Embodied Relational Presence training and personal coaching.  https://www.living-presence.co.uk/

The Heart of Connection and Sun Rising NVC Attunement

Simon McKibbin Presence Meditations & Reflections