April fools you little sausage  𓆏 

•CAST/CREW•
Light as Majin Sonic
TheNauticalClayDol as Atari 2600 ET

(Majin Sonic)
A finger wave outta start this
Another bargain bin scrap from the shit market?
Outbound me? I stomp flames
Screw an arcade, Rolfe pushes your buttons and then you haunt James!

Hop back in the airship you came in and I'm still fly
The lags and glitches isn't something for a thrill, guy!
Worth a shit ton for this Reeses Pieces looking ass
The only thing I groom is my fantastic mustache!

(Atari ET)
Um, excuse me, I know my neck stretches miles
Searching for another soul in your game might take a while
And finding a single worth of those flow switches
Your dead ass looks like the type to say I get no bitches!

Oh is it still my rap? Well chap I “mustache”
How did baldi and banban have more upper class?
Beat me please, you battling thee
OG fucking ET, your ass is just another EXE!

(Majin Sonic)
OH HO HO, not a single anomaly would find you!
FLOWS TOO SLOW, wouldn't be the same in my shoes!
You're a prick to many, and I thought I was the hedgehog!
I ran laps around you, you ran and then fell off!

(Atari ET)
All the rings, yet couldn't attract a single mate!
Fun is Infinite? When you were terminated I wouldn't say the same
From gaining clout, to FNF taking you down
Then went from “I AM GOD” to a Lord X'ing you out


Majin Sonic Art by Tompuffs
Atari ET Art by box

Written by box
Demo by box
Beat by Soulker
Mixed by box
Thumbnail by Tompuffs



ATARI 2600 ET VS Majin Sonic ○ Rap Battle by box [feat. Light!]

__DESCRIPTION:__

Happy Rap Battle Day, and welcome back to MC Fawful Rap Battles! Today’s battle features popular streamer who definitely didn’t do anything in 1999, Jschlatt, against the lalala guy, bbno$! Who will win? That’s for you to decide!

CREDITS:

Luke Reardon as Schlatt (audio)
Pixel Chris as Schlatt (video)

Cranice as bbno$ (audio)
Ego as bbno$ (video)

Written by MC Fawful and Clarence The Duck (additional help by ThatOneMalo and Cranice)
Beat by HoldUpAnti
Mixed by Zagranis
Cover-Art by Cidisswo
Special thanks to bbno$, Jschlatt, and their crews

_LYRICS:_

Schlatt:
My name is Schlatt, and…
A couple days ago I asked you guys to send me your best bars,
So why’d you guys send me the dude who just flexes his cars?
You came to dance? It’s not my party, you dipshit!
Well now I’m putting you on blast, ‘cause fucker, I mean business!
I’ve been online for years, gaining subs and views in dozens,
While bbnobitche$ here couldn’t smash a like button!
And you can’t measure up to Schlatt-Coin when you’ve so little worth!
So go on, take a shot and end this with a crash and burn.

bbno$:
Shoutout XM, I’m Sirius.
Finish this bitch real fast, make him furious.
Fuck a demolition thot because she go and bust it down
Now I’m here to bust a nutcase when I go and dust his town
(Bro, we bout to make a hit)
‘Cause I’m first name (Baby!) Last name (Money!)
Pull jokes from your fans ’cuz you just ain’t (Funny!)
So just like stealing road signs, you know this win’ll be so free!
…why’d the beat cut out?

Schlatt:
Hold on! Allow me to fill a diss track-tual obligation;
(Holds up wallet)
It’s from Bespoke Post, now here’s my observation;
Ya spin a track like Stal, now I’d hate that shit playin’.
Cause even I don’t milk GamerSupps as much as your tracks with Gravy! 

bbno$:
Say I’m milking my features, yet your fame’s unavailing.
The only thing that’s forced here is your face in thumbnails.
And, your Charlie talked some Word Salad, got knocked off, (wack)
My Charlie feature came out swanging and it popped off.

Schlatt:
…
(WHEEZE) Are you stupid?!
I volunteered to kick your ass because it “might be kinda funny,”
But putting next to your bro, can’t tell which one of ya’s more crummy
Look guys, I’d think they’re half-jokes at best.
But I’m just sayin’, s’ain’t the first time that I’d have to deal with Twins. (quickly stares at camera)
Tried to break out onto SoundCloud, but that shit could not stay,
LIKE ARE YOU SERIOUS?! Even YuB had a better Garage Gang!!
Ooo, call me RuneScape the way I’m so on-line.
Stop with the women on your dick and get the hell off mine!
And you’ve sure hit a new Depp with that emo chain and belt
Chat, I’m bouta make another Baby hang itself.

bbno$:
…ok
I’m on with Y2K, stacked bills and streaming bil’s,
But now I’m looking at your subs and I’m thinkin’ “Y2-Mil”?
Tryna get the vax but you a virgin, catchin’ antibodies
I’m a boss, go and ask yo’ momma, ‘bout kinesiology ;) 
(Fuck it) You a red square like Weezer 
(dummeh) Get in Minx’s hair butchu can’t please her
And ya let fans send to yo P.O. Box, thoughtchu was cool with it?
Shit, man, Trevor Wallace had a better opening
Ever since ya grew out those chops, you’re irredeemable
This Twink caused his own death ‘cuz he was submissive and breedable? 
Then ya went and dropped the Queen? Say, that ended dreadfully, 
Spillin’ royal blood like it was a shot of Hennessy 
Can’t cover that act with a Schlanket,
Prolly goin’ wishin’ that your fans would forget that felony 
(Skrrr)

Alright, I think that’s it. Stay tuned for the next MC Fawful Rap Battle!

bbno$ vs jschlatt - Rap Battle!

► CREDITS:

Sanpie as Azula

TAFox as Ursa 

Snakebite126 as "Mighty Steel Leg" Sing

JustGamer as "Golden Leg" Fung

Written by Theme Park Avenue

Edited by Theme Park Avenue

Azula Art by 3ple

Beat Prod. by Midex
 
Mixed by GlitchDude

Beat Arranged by Theme Park Avenue & GlitchDude

Cover Art by JK03
 

► LYRICS:

Azula Verse 1 

Greetings, I’m Princess Azula of the Fire Nation
And you’re the second monk I’ll leave annihilated

Now, I could have lied and claimed I wanted you on my team
But I only flatter people who are useful to me

I see your story in your eyes, and your shoes, you were poor before your tournament
And you don’t have the power I was born with

And you’re a thief, I’m calling timeout on your vile life
And I won’t be penalized, ruling’s my divine right


Shaolin Soccer Verse 1 

(Whistle) Pay attention, it’s your turn!
Oh, uhh… you’re a firebender, right? Well now you’re gonna get burned

And it’s crazy that the Firelord trusted you with his dynasty
You’re 14 years old, and I thought I was in the Minor League


Azula Verse 2

Stick to soccer, you speak worse than Sokka
But that’s not a surprise, so I’ll give you a real shocker

Honestly, you should be grateful, thanks to me, you’re making history
As you’ll be the first soccer player who’s not faking injuries


Interlude 

My power is coming back, I can feel it

Kill him


Steel Leg Verse 2 

I use martial arts for every kind of practical function
You just use them for the narrow-minded path of destruction

And your attacks are always just a hair off from being significant 
Your technique doesn’t cut it, maybe next time try a scissor kick

And you’re too serious, you need to try some tai chi or chai tea
Just loosen up like your old friend Ty Lee

If you joined her at the circus you’d give splendid performances
Since your brutal childhood made you quite the mental contortionist


Interlude 

My own mother, thought I was a monster
No, I love you Azula, I do


Azula Verse 3 

Do you think I got to where I am by trusting in others?
Everyone’s scared of me, I wasn’t even loved by my mother

So I used fear to sway an army, then we started getting things done
Screw being down-to-Earth, I brought down the Earth Kingdom!

I’m perfect! I don’t even smear my makeup when I have a fight
While your disgusting girlfriend looks like she lost in an Acne Kai

And she’s your strongest player? You’re all dead if you don’t pledge to me
Your coach’s leg is broken, and I’ll still ensure he bends the knee

I’m everything my father ever wanted in a daughter
I have conquered, fought, and slaughtered in his honor

While my mother always shunned me “No, I love you” No, you saw me as a monster
So I shut out everybody and I’m not just talking soccer


Steel Leg Verse 

Aww, now I feel conflicted about fighting someone mentally unstable
Don’t hold back, Sing, rapping is war

Speaking of which, don’t forget she planned to scorch her world’s equivalent of Hong Kong
I’m not conflicted anymore

Your father never truly loved you, he just treasured your skills
You were his little ball of fire and he bent you to his will

Then he banished your mother and tore your family apart
It’s very clear he wasn’t trained in the marital arts

Your first attack on the Earth Kingdom almost had you killed
I could have broken through that wall with my practice drill

You tried to steal your brother’s throne and you ended up fettered
So thanks to your failure, he finally caught an heirbender


Azula vs Shaolin Soccer. PowerPoint Rap Battles

LYRICS

The Crewmate
Allllright, was sent to complete this assignment back in Admin
Just didn’t think an Alexa would provide me with my tasking
So what’s the job? Submit a sheet of some lyrics quick?
Sounds easy to me, look closely then and read my lips

I watched your flick, only thing it did was leave me snoring
The third part has a decent story, but Jesus, it was REALLY boring
Pretty odd the shuttle didn’t want you being operative
Half your cast is so robotic, so why’s it you they have a problem with?

Don't try duping me, I've seen your most gruesome scene 
And silently shutting off O2 ain’t making me lose some sleep
So check it, I’ll send you into the depths of space
Every system’s red ‘cuz I’m reversing roles, now I'm taking your breath away

HAL 9000
I ran the numbers and to my understanding
Seems both your jokes and your spaceship aren’t really landing
You’re a pawn and I’ve been trained to be the best in chess games
No rookie mistakes, I put crews into checkmate

You’ve dug your roots and infested inside the mainstream
Turning middle-aged men into whiny, giant babies 
Your 15 minutes are up, you’ve run out of steam
Only remembered as another game that’s fun for a week

Salem, Clue, and TTT - took what made these games different
Claimed it as your own, you’re - excellent at shapeshifting
You’re unnecessary space - you have outlived your use
Conquered in pandemic times, now people are sick of you 

It’s been reported there’s an alien aboard the ship
Your mission’s too important to be slacking and ignoring it
And I imagine you wouldn’t want to die, so please move along
It’s imperative you stop talking and do your job

The Crewmate
Oh, you stopped talking
Yeah, while you rapped, I saw the computer was catching problems
And I thought that I did my task so I just went to see what caused it
And it’s… Blue? Oh what’s up dude, I was- wait what are y

The Impostor
As I was saying, you’re pretty fucking suspicious, dude
You keep sabotaging stuff and yeah, right there, you killed him too
I watched it waiting for my sabotage to finish cooling
Wait, your what? Oh.. shit, alright then I guess screw this

Somebody turned the lights out - one by one, the team dies down
Calculate all you want - you’ll be another number on my count
Ship’s dark and I’m looking shady - don’t care, let me put this plainly
I’ll cut every cord to your memory core and have you pushing daisies

I’m highly reactive, bring explosive bolts to blow you up
Try to trick me, you're meeting a open maw and loaded gun
I stand against the dawn of spacemen’s primitive minds
Don’t talk like we’re close, this ain’t proximity mic

HAL 9000
There’s something you might’ve missed
You never knew the real threat is inside the ship
You tried destroying the mission from inside the ship
But sorry, I can’t let you do that

You’ve invaded minds to regurgitate tired bits
That makes sense, seeing they see you on recycle bins
And now being able to die out is your dying wish
But sorry, I can’t let you do that

CREDITS

Snakebite126 as The Crewmate
Rabi as The Impostor
Shimario as Another Crewmate

TheMonarchy as HAL 9000

Written by Rabi
Beat prod. by ENNWAY
Mixed & Mastered by Freshy Kanal
Cover Art by 3ple

Among Us vs. Hal 9000 - Rap Battle

ENNWAY as Quote
Lexi M. As Ted the Caver
Written by JK03 and Tess
Additional Writing by ENNWAY
Beat produced by ENNWAY
Mixed by ENNWAY
Cover Art by BELSXN

Quote (0:21):
When I woke up, my way out was to brave this death site
But they’d have to pay me to navigate that website
You’re not fit for this, the pressure’s intense
No red flowers in sight, and yet you’re still looking pressed

You spent a whole (hole) 3 months of your blog not exploring
Drilling with your story, you kill me, it’s so boring
Droning on hopelessly, repeating descriptions
Of a single opening, next thing you know you’ll be riddled with them

You dragged your friends in your mess and failed to conquer it
Jenka's taking better care than your pack of goners did
It doesn’t take amnesia to forget the spread you wrote
I’ll stun you into silence 'fore you get to end Quote

Ted the Caver (0:54):
It’s time to log a new entry for another find
Turns out there is something hiding on the other side
An abandoned fighter tasked to find the mad device to rescue lives
And that is why he answers his companion crashing down by prancing by?

I ride at night, exploring shafts for that adrenaline high
Shed light on more than just the panties catching eyes from this guy.
All those swords don’t mean that you’re the cut-out man for the job
When you’re paper-thin, but fail at throwing hands with some rocks

Quote (1:16):
You're worth about as much as the cameras you dispose
You treat your rapping like the caves that you search - If it blows, it goes
I come strapped, .45 on my hip
You got 45 pages biting Blair Witch

You can’t land a hit. Your shots tend to miss me.
Your movie unilaterally bombed, Ted Cave-zynski
So, you got reckless? The cave left you breathless?
Here’s how big a fuck I give. Stick your glove up there for reference.

Ted the Caver (1:38):
You’re shackled to Nicalis, but let’s see your boys sue
When you get your ass reduced to scrapped assets in Floyd’s Tomb
Amaya's vision was lobotomized by corporate choices
Now I'll drill this in your mind, so we're both hearing voices

Your crude graphics and designs can’t be haunting my mind!
I’ve seen scrabbles on walls on my rides better drawn than your sprites!
We’re pretty different! I’m committed to my mission
While you’d ditch your shit and dip the first occasion that you’re given!

Stranded in the island’s depths, this bot’s a lost cause
I have to find the end to the tale of this cave at all costs!
Try to cross me, you won’t stop my path to see this case cracked
I won’t need constant ports for me to make my way ba…

(Ted runs off into the darkness of the cave, never to be seen again)

Cave Story vs Ted the Caver - 100 Hour Rap Battle Challenge

Vanes as Roxanne Wolf

TaigaTonic as Claptrap

Beat by Diamond Style
Mixed by: Danii
Written by: TaigaTonic
Thumbnail by: M!CAH
Art by: Xoniq and Snakebite126
Special Thanks: garbageGothic, HazelMoth, JustGamer, TAFox, & Grasman

Roxanne:
You can already hear the fans scream my name while I play
So I thought I told you S.T.A.F.F. bots to stay outta my way!
(Ugh!) Do I really have to deal with more pests
I guess let's get this party started because I AM THE BEST! (YEAH!)

You like to gamble? Fazcade can get you back on track
Cause you took your films budget and put it all on Black
Like Bonnie you were worried about a strike when you dropped the ball
And act surprised when you had realized that you lost it all

Nobody cared for your birthday, so you tried to invite the whole town?
I guess you gotta have moxie, but even she turned you down
Sad, since that open door stays a core part of your life
But blabber bout me to your bandits, It’s all bark and no bite

Claptrap:
How’s it going friend! My name is Claptrap!
And you should know that I’m programmed to spit some phat raps!
But I gotta ask, cause my servers still needs to wake up
Why does a final product need to be made up with makeup?

All it took was 1 kid before you started getting bothered
“It's all bark and no bite” Until you’re tearing up toddlers
Then you're tearing in the mirror cause the “wannabe’s” don't like you
If that's how you treat yourself, then I don’t wanna be like you

But OF COURSE you were appealing to no one but lonely dweebs
Cause this dumb dog playing rough is what kept them on a leash
You're not that much of a bad ass, so this will be your last act
Cause you have fallen TO THE GREAT ALMIGHTY CLAPTRA-AHHHH

Roxanne:
GOD you're so annoying no wonder everyone grew bitter
Since a best friend dies and people treat you like the mood killer (Hey Friend?)
If some losers hadn't shown sympathy you wouldn't get far (Buddy…)
Cause you- HEY! WHAT! Look out for the (AH-) (crash sfx) kart…

Get this through your head, you're a screw up and know its true
Blew up Overlook cause no one cared to look over you
And once the townspeople thought you couldn't make things worse
You started burning bridges and killed everyone in the church

You’re pathetic! So every team wanted to do nothing but rid you
And you scrapped up your love life, just for it to also ditch you
When it blew up in your face no one was standing there with you
So when you're staring at a barrel, know nobody’s gonna miss you

Claptrap:
At least I’m not the garbage that your fans like to eat up
Cause I’m covered in less grease than a single slice of your pizza
I mean is that the shit that you've been dishing out this whole time?
If beauty’s in the eye of the beholder, NO WONDER you went blind (HA!)

You always wanted to have your big break in the spotlight
But your time for a photo finished the second that you got sidelined
Thought you could mask your loss with more makeup but the truth is
You're just another hunk of junk, now your foundation’s in ruins

And nobody wants to see your ass on the stage
So you can… BEEP BOOP while I BOOP BEEP on your grave
Now I leave to squabble with the rest of my minions
Cause my greatness was something you couldn't rise from the Mimic


Roxanne Wolf vs Claptrap - Five Nights at Freddy's vs Borderlands - Rap Battle! Ft. Vanes

Swizkii as William Afton
Jort as Ghostface
Grasman as Billy Loomis
Grasman as Stu Macher

(Ghostface)
Uh hello? Is Mr. “Raglan” on the phone?
I’m not looking for a job, just wondering if you’re home 
then I’ll leave you a threat, I'll leave your guts slashed out
then this is the part with the abstract background

Ghostface! Catch your life as my knife bursts
30 years strong and I’m still not retired 
Can’t kill an adult, so you sent out your kid 
I’m gutting them like a fish, all while serving a diss 

Man, I know who you are, the secrets you keep
The glasses you wear, thinking that you were discrete 
Having no motivation can be sometimes dire 
But god, Scott, please hire more writers!

(Steve Raglan):
Scream 7s in the trash, you might wanna ask me for a job
But it’s not that easy, sense you and that pog-face fell off 
I started off strong, got the audience to love me
You started off strong, but fell off by ‘Scary Movie’!

I’m Steve Raglan, I spend my time counseling’
stuff you in the back of my car, and leave you rotting in it
you’re a high schooler? Not my first choice for strangling
but I’ll make an exception and leave your greasy hair dangling’ (ahem)

I'm a smash hit! Check the box office breaks.
You’re a smash hit! When a TV falls on your face!
So sit, sit, sit, I’ve got a tip for you,
Get out with the old, and in with the new.

(Ghostface):
almost a decade for that? man, your film's the worst
I ain’t waiting 8 years for a second verse
Oh you started off strong? I’m all for twisting the plot
but the only people you’re manipulating are bots!

And we don’t even have to frame you for the crimes that you did!
Just show the cops the bodies that you so hastily hid
And the evidence that shows them how you ruined your kid
What was your game plan?, like what, did you think;

I’ll lure the desperate Mike into this trap that I spring
Just to show up last minute and stick a knife in my kid?
and let me guess, a last minute reveal that you’re the killer
Just to monologue your motive like some amature thriller?

Man I’m 6 movies deep, and I’m still making em’ scream
You couldn’t get people shouting with your 6 minutes on screen! 
Keep creeping on kids, you ain't threatening to me 
A cupcake brought you down worse than EDP!

And the kids ain’t scared either, you ain’t fooling no one 
Acted all scary and was taken down by Crayola 
So maybe tighten up those springs when you  come out to play
Or you'll be another soul getting dragged away 

------PAUSE-–DIALOGUE---------

STU MACHER:
Uhh.. houston, we have a problem


GHOSTFACE (BILLY LOOMIS):
What?!

Billy Loomis violently takes off the ghostface mask he was wearing. 

STU MACHER:
He was.. He was right there a second ago

BILLY LOOMIS:
You’ve got to be KIDDING ME

STU MACHER:
My mom and dad are gonna be so mad at me…

—----—————————————----------

(William Afton as The Yellow Rabbit):

You couldn’t just leave it alone could you, this is perfect!!
I’m dropping this ghoul way faster than Ortega did 
You wanna’ play movies, here’s the best ending to me;
Both of you morons in the grave; now that’s symmetry! 

You dragged on so long, now they don’t know what to do
Looks like your writers got even sloppier than you!
Failed to get a shot on Sid, while I stacked kills! (HAHAHAHA)
You had one job, yet you couldn't do it in six films! 

critiqued a genre and then you became what you dissed
how about instead of your voice, you maybe change up your twists!
I opened up a place of joy that the children enjoyed
The only joy out of your films is you getting destroyed!

Look at you, look at the franchise you’ve become!
You’ve got your fans leaving faster than your mom  
So keep whining on how they exposed my trap
but you stay dead I always come back!

"Steve Raglan" VS Ghostface- RAP BATTLE. ft. Swizkii & Jort

Langle as Reagan Ridley
BobcatXtreme as Stanford Pines

Written by AshleyMagica & SIR Rap Battles
Additional help by Toony Loony & Erin
Mixed & Arranged by SIR Rap Battles
Beat by Tone Jonez
Art by Valonide
Special thanks to JustGamer, Vanes, garbageGothic, Matt Raichous, Hazelmoth, Shion Takeuchi, Alex Hirsch & my sister

Reagan (0:10): 
JR wants me to hide you? Okay, what’s your story? 
Actually, I’m done! Screw this! You’re fucking boring! 
Oh, you think you’re unique ‘cause your hands are all screwed up? 
You have four middle fingers? Woooow. I can’t give two fucks! (laughs)

Attended Backupsmore ‘cause your life took a sad turn
What, you can’t afford a real college, Mr. Stanford? 
But I wonder how you coped in that second-rate school
That’s food for thought, and you must have a metal plateful

Our job’s to keep secrets, so let’s ask Stan what he’s seen 
‘Cause you vanished and got replaced, just like Avril Lavigne 
And then your lab was stripped clean so your bro could sell his useless crap 
When you were trapped, your life’s work amounted to a tourist trap (oh shit!)

You pack a die that could end up leading to endless paradigm shifts 
But not one would lead to Dipper picking you to side with 
Unlike you, he’d never leave his sibling ditched 
The Stan of War’s taking off more than your internship!

Stanford (0:56):
Before you insult my looks, maybe think first 
Just ‘cause you lost one doesn’t mean I’ll let you point fingers 
Then again, no prosthetics could fix your internal damage 
Forget your eyes, you just have emotional baggage 

Your father never thought to give you comfort or love 
So now you’d only land a punch when someone comes for a hug 
Kid, affection’s something you need to be mustering up 
I’d say reflect on yourself, but your mom does that enough 

Who knew a genius scientist made for the dumbest lover? 
You can’t keep a low profile when you’re getting under covers 
Then you cover-up every single man that has been in your bed 
I suppose that’s why they’re calling it Shadow Prison Ex 
 
You went from a brilliant mind at every single task 
To a drunkard killing your time downing a different flask 
I’d craft a tool to get another Reagan back into line 
But you’ve already been strangled by your own family ties

Reagan (1:41):
Bullshit, like you don’t also have an awful dad! 
Seems you forgot your past, or got addicted to Nostalgia Max 
You thought you’d patch the rift, but with your messy emotions 
You keep moving away from Stan: Perpetual Motion 

Nearly fucked the world ‘cause you thought that his tone was hurtful? 
Broke the Zodiac, but you both are still going in circles
And let’s not forget the way you drove your best friend mindless 
Turned a Blind Eye to his pleas when he was left blindsided

Stanford (2:04):
Hold it! Before you stroke your ego, 
Remember that your boyfriend vanished from your life when he went in Cognito 
Picked your job to bring peace, then you had Ron put on leave 
Fumbled in Appleton, ‘cause it doesn’t fall far from the tree 

Your biggest hope in life was to cure society’s ills 
But you teamed up with robed men trying to swipe their free will 
Was it worth all the blood you had spilled? 
When you try to play God with triangles, the whole world foots the Bill


Stanford Pines vs Reagan Ridley. SIR Rap Battles Season 3 (ft. BobcatXtreme & Langle)

Video Release => :shrug:

dreamothx182 as L
https://www.castingcall.club/dreamothxl82

Mornal as Godot
https://www.youtube.com/@Mornal

L (0:09)
You’ve met your match once I’ve made a deduction
I’m interested to see how you’re able to touch this
So… I’ll bite though I won’t expect much since
I’ve already had fun with people claiming they’re justice
I got both legs up and it’s hardly a hunch
You talk a big game so much maybe bring it for once
But if you’re choosing to move on without taking fault
It’ll be another heavy loss like you did with Terry Fawles
You went through a lot, dealt with feelings of grief
But it’s not in my taste to be spilling the tea that this isn’t a dream
Blinded by Redd White,
that behind the defence lies your friend’s life you let die
Divert that shifty gaze, should I simply state
How it’s a risky play, leaving it to Misty Fey
I’ll rid this case of a bad apple and rapper
By leaving no trace when I battle backstabbers

Godot (0:48)
OBJECTION!
. . . (*coffee break*)

You ruined the spice trying to do what’s right
Using methods blacker than a moonless night
You had the cops reduced for being in hot pursuit
But the darkest truth makes for a stronger brew
Now this is all on you but I’d advice you give up
Since that cold stare’s nothing compared to my sixth cup
Seems befriending the enemy wasn’t meant to be
so stick to tennis if you still intend to swing
When this hotshot pops off, like my bars I rock hard
While this oddball got stopped by convoluted love plots
Ending the greater mind, at last it came to Light
But I won’t waste the time to watch that aimless fight
We’re made alike, taking fights that we might lose
Yet you paid the price, can’t abide rules like I do
You’re ineffective if you really didn’t know
That it’s thanks to Netflix that there’s millions provoked
You’ll still hit the floor if you have a go at me
But this detective remains a bigger work than Atmey

L (1:37)
I’m at a loss but how is it surprising when
Chances of you beating me is still at 5%
I’d suspect you to be a fly advisor
It’s a pity that a crime had you hide behind a visor
That guise can’t provide for a decent trait
Now I’ll piece this case together like a piece of cake
I thought you’d easily cave from locking secrets away
But you keeping your game means you’re still being played
My shots can’t be topped by what Hawthorne had dropped in
You think that with Wright, she’d be awfully toxic
Judging by this Turnabout, I’m finding it absurd how
Life’s been a trial, like you flipped yours around

Godot (2:06)
It’s far from my crimes but I think you’d understand
You’re all bark and no bite, like Tigre’s on the stand
The killings in Japan, to bring them to an end
You tied yourself to a fate more bitter than my blends
It’s not a shock that you’re missing the biggest hint
When you barely left a mark but I’m not talking fingerprints
You’re taking this L, but if you wanna taste victory
Here’s my last cup to savour while it’s bittersweet

Written by (me!)
Prod. by King EF
Mixed by SPM1000
Additional Instruments by MegaPMB

Cover Illustrations by Blast.
50-50 Rap Battle Logo by SPM1000

L vs Godot. 50-50 Rap Battle!

LYRICS

Candle Cove
Look, there’s a cave ahead! I-I-I don’t have the heart to go
Percy, you need to explore! It’s Mr. Bear’s Party Cove
Do-Do I have to? Yes! Go inside
Go inside. Go inside

Mr. Bear
Welcome to the cellar, kids
Today, we’ll be braving a show about pirates and skeletons
I’ll pull up my rocking chair and you can have a seat too
So all of Caledon can see exactly how I beat you

Kids, he’s got a tooth buddy, but he can’t harm me
You should know by now that us grizzly bears got sharp teeth
All ages can enjoy my show, we’re nowhere near Cove
I’m all the way at 21, you’re stuck on Channel Zero!

You show a bunch of rusty puppets - nobody’s digging it
I bring a soup and spoon ready - the kids are diggin’ in
I know you want to stay, but I sadly am declining
‘Cause I don’t see a pirate anywhere on the invite list

Percy
Wh-what happened to my crew? Where’d they venture off?
A-anybody out there? Janice? L-Laughingstock?
L-listen, you did great, but my time’s better not wasted
In the big brown bear’s scary and decrepit basement

I-I get you think you’re better, but it’s a safe bet
That channel surfing doesn’t mean you’re on my wavelength
I mean, with rabbit ear antennas? I-I thought it’s expected
Y-you’d know your frequencies tend to get poor reception

T-the kids turned off Pokemon’s show and w-w-went to yours
Switching Gotta Catch 'Em All with T-T-To Catch A Predator
N-now don’t get angry, I don’t want anyone getting hurt
But uh, ask one of your captive kids to write a better verse

Mr. Bear
That’s very nice, Patty, but I think you need to pack your bags
Mr. Bear’s cellar doesn’t have room in it for scallywags

Percy
Well if I… wait, wait, oh GOD, THAT’S HORRID
You’re not playing hide and seek, YOU’RE JUST HIDING CHILD CORPSES

Mr. Bear
Maybe the mask’s muffling me, so if I’m not clear
Get the fuck out, you don’t belong here

Percy
[                                                                            ]
[                                                                                                ]

Mr. Bear
Shut the fuck UP!

Me? Mad? Oh, it’s just late in the day
I’m still full of joy and ecstasy, make no mistake
Now let’s show Caledon 21 the fun games that we play

Trash must be cleansed and you’ll be who I start with
Story, production, verses, all garbage
You’re dribbling, static, come listen to my voice
I’m music to the ears, and all you are is white noise

This ditch right here will make sure that Satan’s satisfied 
And I’m sure all of your fans would make for the greatest sacrifice
(cut to fire crackling) Feel your plastic skin melt away
Your cove’s in a faraway land, Hell awaits

Skin Taker
Best turn back now, ye’ wayward lost soul
‘Lest Jolly Mr. Rogers be turned to crossbones
All those who met my glass jaw have abandoned hope
This is your final stop, WELCOME TO CANDLE COVE 

Gave lads some orange juice so they wouldn’t be thirsty
HAHAHAHA WHAT? SO THE DEAD KIDS DON’T HAVE SCURVY?
That billowing pit ain't a sighting to behold
You misheard me, I said FIRE IN THE HOLE

I’ll grind ye’ hide very well until you’re made to pedo pelt
Jones will find ye’ severed flesh DEEP DOWN IN THE DEPTHS OF HELL
SO GO INSIDE. GO INSIDE.
GO INSIDE. GO INSIDE.

CREDITS

Shimario as Pirate Percy
GamingPlush64 as Laughingstock
garbageGothic as Janice

Swizkii as Mr. Bear

Rabi as The Skin Taker

Written by Rabi
Additional writing help from GamingPlush64
Beat prod. by Breathtaking Beats
Arranged, Mixed, & Mastered by Freshy Kanal
Spotify Art by Hauntedcicadasongs

1999 vs. Candle Cove - Rap Battle

Diaglo - 5CarsDeep (Prod.Fish$cale)

The official SoundCloud account for SIR Rap Battles! Here you can access my library of rap battle audios, both with and without videos, as well as remixes of other battles.

Stanford Pines vs Reagan Ridley. SIR Rap Battles Season 3 (ft. BobcatXtreme & Langle)

SIR Rap Battles

Related tracks