wash my eyes and scrub my dirty skin and decontaminate
hyperventilate, my words ventilate 
this texas sun will char your skin until it wears away 
push the hand away  
push the hand away 

to those going through it right now i know it hurts
dont let that distract you from the fact that you have worth 
fairytales are darker when you peek behind the curtain 
the world out here will hurt you just be careful with your words 

we were never welcome in this world its arms were closed 
 we were never welcome in this world so whats the use
trapped in flesh and bone only leave home in mask and cloak  
and anyone ive told the story has apologized for you 

break me down to my last molecule and make me new
i never had that much connection with this stranger in my room
drag this empty bag of flesh and blood into its tomb 
feed me to the maggots till my carcass is consumed 

wash my eyes and scrub my dirty skin and decontaminate
hyperventilate, my words ventilate 
this texas sun will char your skin until it wears away 
push the hand away  
push the hand away 
(repeat)

decontaminate

GiveUp.demo (prod. sorrow bringer)

Letdown

dont you think its passionate the sounds of the crashing from the will of gravity 
the buildings down and in ruble among ashes and the long deceased
the smashed together metal beams all torn to shreds like pedals of a flower   

when ur in my bed
and its not right
cause its not me
and this love brings dread 
on this tripwire
in this lust finds
something in myself 
you said you saved me but i dont think i agree
i couldnt tell who my friends were cause i wasnt me 
i kept that dress in my backpack for years and years
i think theres something about that but idk

dont you think its passionate the sounds of the crashing from the will of gravity 
the buildings down and in ruble among ashes and the long deceased
the smashed together metal beams all torn to shreds like pages on the ground 
with bolts and wires  
dress floats by
white silk and laced chiffon 
spotless and dry

the sounds of the crashing from the will of gravity the buildings down and in rubble

love song 4 the ghost i see in my room sometimes 

original beat by killedmyself (chopped and pitched)
additional violin by my good friend Mohini 

its not somethin else
its exactly whats the most obvious
its so easy to tell
and im no good at hiding it
its rly not that hard to figure out
the obsessions not mutual 
i know u like me but not as much
i wanna be what you think about
i cant help but fall in one sided love 

and im stuck in it  
i get so dumb in it 
there might be something
to make me feel more whole 
somehow 
your touch that feels like home 
but then u cast me off and i end up more alone
strung up
im just a puppet
u can make me dance 
im happy to perform 
in ur bed
im nestled up and warm
hoping 
the night can last more long 

ive been numbed up i dont feel it 
i dont feel the touch im too hollow
can u help me get more human 
maybe some emotions to borrow 
i think im the worlds best escapist 
back then i just didnt wanna exist
so i buried my head in the sand
look at all the time i wasted

. . . . .

when im in your arms it felt so warm like home

[Intro]
Nothing new I do is really new to me (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)
See shit fucking coming so preemptively (Pussy, now I ride)
Marijuana got me thinking heavily (You fucked just for, ayy)
I'm the only one a step ahead of me

[Verse]
Pussy, now I ride (Ride, ride)
We get fucked up just for fun (Just for fun)
I forget the feeling of the sun (Of the sun)
Excess dopamine is on my veins, feeling pain
If I think it in reality, I'm numb (I'm numb)
I know you got bare mans, but I'm the one (I'm the one)
You know I hate the childish shit, it's never fun (Shit is not)
I'm the boy, I'm the kid, I'm the one (I'm the one)
Try to take the throne and you get shunned (You get shunned)
Double-stuffed blunt, get me buzzed
Keep feeling the feeling of my limbs all being fuzz (Fuzz)
Holding something potent, I can't take it on the bus (Bus)
You think we McDonald's, how we carrying the nugs
Brain splat, face black, tell me where my place at
Someone else was driving, though he doesn't know the way back
Drop top, Maybach
Girly throw her waist back
Whole zip, face that, I'm not one to waste that

[Chorus]
Nothing new I do is really new to me (New to me)
See shit fucking coming so preemptively
Marijuana got me thinking heavily (Heavily)
I'm the only one a step ahead of me (Skrrt)

[Open Verse]

[Outro]
Nothing new I do is really new to me
See shit fucking coming so preemptively
Marijuana got me thinking heavily
I'm the only one a step ahead of me

9TAILS - one (prod. pilgrim)

[Intro]
I'm not doing as good, as I really wanted to at the start
(Beam me up Scotty)
I'll probably fucking die in the next few months or something with my luck

[Chorus]
Hopeless nights tend to forget about the sickness till it's time
When I'm rid of all the fucking pharmaceuticals or prescriptions
Sliding through the real world on vomit from my system
What the fuck is wrong with my life
I'm weaning off of everything that kept me sane at night
Every scrape or cut or bruise or sore is cancer in my mind
Preemptive sick days you never know when you might die (RIP)

[Verse 1]
When you might die about a thousand fucking ways to do it everyday of life
Not a fucking lie there's shows about it on spike
Danger's real and it exists inside your mind (Fucking mind)
I don't give a fuck if you pay me, no royalties make it easy
Put every purchase on my Visa my food money could buy a Mercedes
Miles don't give a fuck and they praise me (Oh), minor fevers might phase me
Haven't ate in a couple days, so even shit could look tasty (Yuh)
Puking in a Starbucks bathroom, then I order from the menu
Organize loose plans, so they fall through
I'm really good at cancelling when I want to
At this point I don't know if I want you
Really good at fucking up when I got you
Really good at dodging everything about truth
If the book of lies exist I'll make a part two (Okay, okay)

[Chorus]
Hopeless nights tend to forget about the sickness till it's time
When I'm rid of all the fucking pharmaceuticals or prescriptions
Sliding through the real world on vomit from my system
What the fuck is wrong with my life
I'm weaning off of everything that kept me sane at night
Every scrape or cut or bruise or sore is cancer in my mind
Preemptive sick days you never know when you might die

[Verse 2]
What is this scene, I don't wanna fucking die
I'll make music about awaking to the smell of apple pie (Shit is yummy)
There's no clout in here if you're enjoying life
I don't fuck with anyone who uses sadness as a high
All emotions are my vice, firm relationships I like
I got molten lava touch if you want talk about something fire
Put piano in rewind and I can spit verses all night
I can tell you life is shit in songs it doesn't make it right
I've had friends I like a lot, but I drop them out of spite
If I block out all the guilt bet I could ghost them over night (I'll fucking ghost)
I'll fucking ghost, I'll fucking ghost (Overnight)
Okay, okay, okay

[Chorus]
Hopeless nights tend to forget about the sickness till it's time
When I'm rid of all the fucking pharmaceuticals or prescriptions
Sliding through the real world on vomit from my system
What the fuck is wrong with my life
I'm weaning off of everything that kept me sane at night
Every scrape or cut or bruise or sore is cancer in my mind
Preemptive sick days you never know when you might die (Fucking die)

9TAILS - liar (prod. scottysplash)

[Intro: 9TAILS]
Yo (Yo)

[Chorus: 9TAILS]
Shit way too real
Overloaded, I forgot how to feel (Feel)
Mental forcefield of high grade steel
Show me how you work, baby, looking like a meal snack
Girl whatchu wield, weapon defection, you kill me with feels
Cracked (Cracked), open exposed
How you look hot when you fill me with cold (Burr)

[Verse 1: 9TAILS]
Touchin' the toes
Locking the door when I'm packing a bowl
Don't let me go, I'll tell you the facts
When I say I love you, I love you to death (Death)
Look at your breath
Why are we freezing outside in the back
Get in the bed and she biting my ears
Take control of my head and just play with the fear (Fear)
Got her singin', phone ringin', no time for the loved ones
Stone cold like shogun, like Austin
Bad bitch head of Princeton, got a clout hit list
Miss this, I don't really do long distance
Washed up rappers lookin' like dishes
Witness, the birth of a wave
Come with the ammo or you get erased (Erased)

[Chorus: 9TAILS]
Shit way too real
Overloaded, I forgot how to feel
Mental forcefield of high grade steel
Show me how you work, baby, looking like a meal snack (Meal)
Girl whatchu wield, weapon defection, you kill me with feels
Cracked, open exposed
How you look hot when you fill me with cold (Fill me with cold)

[Verse 2: shattered]
She's always chasin' weed
Yeah, she be a fiend
Hope on any dude that says he's got some speed
She gives neck for free after she had told me
I broke her heart in two, I'm bugged and I get through
When I blow up, will I see you again? (See you again)
I knew you bitch, I'd drop that dude giving head (Giving head)
I know that you wish that I would be dead (I would be dead)
But I hope you know that I already bled
Level my brain, I'm so numb
I can't feel a thing, my eyes start to bleed
My heart turns to black, I can't even attack
I can't even believe what you've done to me
Heart palpitations, my room of carnations
The breaking foundation of this creation
Feeling like Goku, now I'm Super Saiyan
Get out my way, I don't care what you're sayin'

[Chorus: 9TAILS]
Shit way too real
Overloaded, I forgot how to feel (Feel)
Mental forcefield of high grade steel
Show me how you work, baby, looking like a meal snack (Meal)
Girl whatchu wield, weapon defection, you kill me with feels
Cracked (Cracked), open exposed
How you look hot when you fill me with cold (Fill me with cold)

9TAILS - vision (ft. shattered)

Suicide

I Hate Highways

Or At Least Thats What I Tell Myself

nothing much
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just happy to be here

GiveUp.demo (prod. sorrow bringer)

Softheart

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