soundcloud.com/heroz2299 + soundcloud.com/dethconi

look me dead in the eyes

Jaded w/ Coni [heroz]

soundcloud.com/xternalz / soundcloud.com/staywithmenow

i'm reaching out to you, the furthest star in our sky

Again [xternalz]

soundcloud.com/muieternal
soundcloud.com/m2monroe x soundcloud.com/kyoakyo
i live for moments like these

[soundcloud.com/clay0127:]
i know this thoughts just a scums wish
i dont expect you to arrange it
its more your MO to play tricks and
you dont fuck with the complaining

[soundcloud.com/muieternal:]
eternal lie,
i bleed too dryy
you hear my cry
feel - i wont try

it's what's best
i deserve
that u take the light
my thoughts get
even worse
it's like all my life

when you'd fall
i would catch
to make up for the timee
to reverse my life,
to make up for time

[soundcloud.com/clay0127:]
a pack of reds on the desk
i know if you saw who i became
that youd hate it
and all the feelings id erased
id regain them
at night i lie awake
wishing that id never made them
decisions i forget
yet theyre still messin w my head
and i run back in
even knowing its amourette
cuz even though its so ephemeral
at times i feel blessed
i know it couldnt last
but i dont want it to end
give me another sec

give me another event
any reason i could find
just so ill see you again
my self destructive tendencies
and complete lack of self respect
will let me open up the door for you
to run in and wreck
everything that ive kept-

-sacred, my sanity girl you can have it
you can take it
i promise i can keep a smile and ill fake it
next up on the podium ill be your new replacement

Amourette w/ Mui [monroe x kyoa]

i swear to god i will come back for you. the right way, this time

[part one]
ill be missing u
when its all gone
the time we spent before i depart
that love was true
even if i
gotta run

[part two]
rebuild the pattern
what does it matter
run out of time
i watch the hourglass
it shatters
i should be happy but 
im scared of next chapters
i dont wanna let you go
and leave my heart in tatters

DEPARTURE [joalisho]

soundcloud.com/xternalz x soundcloud.com/kyoakyo

i really couldn't be any happier than i am right now

[soundcloud.com/clay0127]
I don't ever wanna let go
But I knew: This love was never gonna hold
Still though, I'm always wishing for the most
Still holding on to a little bit of hope

There's just a little left
Fight to my last breath
In the kitchen, singing
Making food at 2am
The memories I make with you, they're my favorite
Babygirl, I can't believe I'm bouta waste this
Talk on nothing, take my hand; This my last dance
Falling in with you is something that I really couldn't have planned
I'll never understand the way the world works
I'll never understand why I keep getting hurt

It shouldn't feel like this, I should be excited 
Left home all alone got reminded
Of the beauty of the place I resided
Of all the people, all the love that I might miss
Of having someone that I really can confide in
Of why I shouldn't walk away, you're my light, and-
No, I don't ever wanna let go

(It's all wrong, when did I lose the plot)
(Everything falls apart)
(I don't know how to stop)

[hook]

Every day I see you, it feels like I'm waking up for the first time
You're the only thing that wanders all around my mind; I can't get enough
Feel the tears in my eyes welling up cause I know
We've only got a few months 'fore I go
But I think I'm in love, I wish I never got close (not true btw i dont regret a thing)
You hold my heart but my souls headed home
Still holding on to a little bit of hope

[soundcloud.com/xternalz]
I’m holding on
I can’t let go
Cause you’re all I want
You’re all I want

I wanted us to last for good
I did all I could
I wish you understood

(I’m still holding on)

Facing down at the floor
I’m chasing the steps now retracing
Don’t want anything replacing
What we had before
Why can’t you just stay?
I’m tired of walking away
This world is turning to grey
I don’t ever want to let go

[hook 2x]

{sidenote : this song is like 7 months old}

Holding Onto Hope w/ Xternalz [kyoa]

soundcloud.com/xternalz x soundcloud.com/mental

cover art also by me

[soundcloud.com/clay0127]
i dont want it taking over
lately its been getting hard to stay sober
got nobody who can hold me any closer
i fear youll see me ending up on a poster

ive been running after shadows of a dream i had
the silhouette fading doesnt make me feel less bad
i put my faith in somebody who aint had my back
bleeding in the rain, wont even face the past

waited on this for ages and it wasnt that
the future i was so patient for, it didnt last
ive spent some time away from you and im regretting that
it hurts when i open my eyes see you aint at my pad

three thousand miles away from my only one

my words cant do it justice
these pictures aint enough
i really think youll love it
if you stay here a month

[soundcloud.com/mental]
life keeps changing but my feelings never did
i've tripped over shit
i've cried like a bitch
i've dreamt of meeting with a kiss
i keep making these mistakes im just a kid
you know how to twist
my heart into bits
and pieces of love that i still miss
things have changed a lot
last year i was afraid of us
not quite your touch but the state of love
nothing like touching and making up
nothing like running away from stuff
nothing like holding your hand and face til
we saw the sun and the moon switch their places
holes in my heart and you're the explanation
i lost my mind trying to fill up the spaces

Three Thousand Miles w/ Mental [xternalz]

soundcloud.com/akasukii
soundcloud.com/hartfxlt x soundcloud.com/1akura x soundcloud.com/decago

cover art also by me

[soundcloud.com/akasukii]
how am i supposed to heal when ur still in my veins 
every breath i take, im calling out ur name 
tell me how to forget, how to let u go 
when the love we had is all i've ever known

[soundcloud.com/clay0127]
i see the shapes
the signs that sealed our fate
no it aint right but what am i to say
its my light so im taking it away

no i cant believe it
im lost in the feeling

of love so strong
it hurts whenever im reminded
that im gone
no i cant shake the feeling
of you in my arms
and so im stuck singing the same old song

[soundcloud.com/akasukii]
how am i supposed to heal when ur still in my veins 
every breath i take, im calling out ur name 
tell me how to forget, how to let u go 
when the love we had is all i've ever known

Believe w/ Akasuki [hartfxlt x akura x decago]

soundcloud.com/hartfxlt
soundcloud.com/tores x soundcloud.com/prodarisu

special thanks to cam for helping me out w the master

[soundcloud.com/clay0127]

im barely keeping afloat
so why dont you let me go?
break it off, leave me alone
cause im lost and you already know
youre wasting time on me
im stuck in place i freeze
every winter i try to find peace
and always end up incomplete

still running to the top
cause with you im feeling starbound
baby take my hand 
ima lead us out the mud somehow
all dust, all love
shit is ours now
way my dreams come alive in your eyes
i feel so found out
i feel so proud
cause you not giving up now
fall apart in your arms
more times than i can count
and everytime you lift me up
keep me unbound
ill give you the world
because you gave me all of mine oh

[soundcloud.com/hartfxlt]

cut at my soul until we're compatible 
its as old as time the story being told 
I try to get away but I'm in your pull 
you live inside my brain I need you out my skull
so seek me out when it cold 
I'm bleeding out and you don't know
tell me was it all for show ?

Freeze w/ Hartfxlt [tores x arisu]

You showed me a life I never thought possible

- with soundcloud.com/xternalz


soundcloud.com/tores 

[soundcloud.com/clay0127]
The space in my locket
Baby thats where youre wanted
The face that I saw
In that new bar off Belmont
It stole my heart and I lost it
I couldnt even call it
I know where it started
But now I keep falling apart for your love
All the covers I weaved come undone
Its getting colder but the cold hasnt stung
Im getting older but Im not scared as much
As I Was

You know what Im wishing for and Im not gonna run
Time I spent without you stay reflected in the rum
Cant be codependent yet addicted to your touch
Tramadol Im wishing for another hit of us honey
Im after the money give you everything you want
Started off as nothing more than just a little crush
Baby now you got me begging you to make it to the sun
I know its a fantasy but Ima make it more than one for us

[soundcloud.com/xternalz]
never thought i'd be here
but i think its alright
i just wanna be near to you
ill make this real
this is not make believe
when i saw that glitter in your eye
i couldnt fight it anymore
every time i still think of you
what are we waiting for?

Tramadol w/ Xternalz [tores]

soundcloud.com/xternalz

cover art by me :>
x.com/clay0127

[words]
its time 2 find a new perspective
rearrange what ive neglected
take life in another direction
the feelings strange that ive reflected
on

im seeing all this mirror imaging of myself
and im afraid i dont know how to ask for help
i wanna give you a chance to develop yourselves
but ive been selfish and im sorry for the hand that i dealt
for so long
ive been running from the damage i felt
would go on
and the mental toll itd take on my health
its so wrong
and the only one to blame is myself
im not strong
but that doesnt mean you should have to

[drown with me]
[drown with me]

too frail
feeling helpless
it doesnt matter what you say im never selfless
rewriting history wont tell you what ive dealt with
i dont wanna scare you away with all my health shit
no nightstand, the pills are in the dresser
im always fucking tucking away what makes me lesser
cant stand it, its too much pressure
my peers they got me doin all the things i said id never
now i

Drown With Me [xternalz]

@kess0kuband
@graveem1nd 
@lovecrysis

- earendel

New tracks tagged #✶✶