how have I not heard this until now what the hell

(i dont know what im trying to get at anymore)

would you visit my house on the harbor?

you are you are
my fading scar

would you visit a house on the harbor?

i want to believe
you would visit me

i want to believe
i want to believe
i want to believe
i-

a small house on the harbor

Census Designated but it's just my voice

https://www.pcrf.net/

https://bdsmovement.net/

Stagnant on morbid curiosity

To crystallize the feeling

Aglow, we flash to grey

And watch the soul deviate
 
Lately you’ve been staring at the corpse

Like there’s nothing left to see

Transfixed by the writing on the wall

Apathy is the disease

If you leave it alone, then somebody gets hurt

If you topple a tree, well the crash will get heard

The system's kinetic, the signal dispersed

I tried to hold the whole weight of the world

anti apathy song

cover art by @9nasu
piano by @alexanderpanos
violin by jessie morgan @ https://www.fiverr.com/jessiem279
additional vocals by @oyeme-thomas
additional texture by @tevinmichaelr
spoken word performed by @tevinmichaelr
spoken word written by @50landing

big thanks to everyone that helped me on this one

lyrics:

whether you’re here or not, i’d still be dancing

whether you’re here or not, i’d still be dancing

you don’t be the judge of my post when i go post on my volition
don’t have to tell me what’s broke cuz i’m the one who broke it to fit my vision 

i don’t care to fix it
seems like a waste of time to me
i don’t mind if you don’t listen
your attention isn’t guaranteed

that’s the thief, thief of joy
who you running from
we deleted masterpieces when you've killed the fun
with comparisons
i wanna go have fun, i want to, i want to
so i’ve decided that

whether you’re here or not, i’d still be dancing
whether you're here or not, oh whether you're

it seeps into my room, cus i wanna be strong
but i wait for you at the door, locked from the inside
distance grows the delay of time, 
a warning sign to my world and all i have

so we stand around these wood framed walls
a forest where i stood tall
from here you can almost see it,
the stars upon the ceiling illuminate me
the scars that are still healing, you can never catch me
after all, your eyes try to paint a picture that you've waited for this whole time
you said i need help but you won't help me help myself
you didn't feel what i felt

dancing

art by @kitefield
from the hidden contact server <3

i am spending every day
sad that you’re so far away
far away from me and all your people

i hate spending every day
i hate that you're so far away
far away from me and all your people

i have been here 
counting the days
since i've last seen your face

how i wish you were around...
to notice it's all changing now

how i wish you were around...
to notice it's all changing now

can you pick me up?
i needed some time, 
some time to be alone
far away from you and other people

you have been there for me, every time i need
now you won't even answer to my crying

how i wish you were around...
to notice it's all changing now

how i wish you were around...
to notice it's all changing now

wish u around

i watch you wander the country with a fist full of stars
building your towers of honey and breaking them apart
and darling you won't regret it if you give me a piece of your heart
cause i know you won't admit it but you're painting me over your scars

sitting in the light as it dawns, you're blossoming all the flowers
lay and watch the night as it falls, i lost count of all the hours
oh the world is a tape player, write me a song
and i'll sing it to you

we watch the planes disappear and the planets embark
making a wish on a chemtrail, on saturn or mars
and darling they're crossed again, but i'm the man who made everything hard
our magnetic confluence is nothing more than a wish on a star

i could be a spark in your eyes, the space where i fly is endless
there i'm just an old satellite, searching for my repentance
oh i've been flying forever and ain't found no god
but he's speaking through you

don't look down

https://ffm.to/alwayswere

cover art by noah geene https://temberl.in/ 

i think i see it in the distance 
___________________________________
always were, like you always were
its the rote screen door on your front porch 
where you fell asleep on the tile floor
but you've unstrung all your britching now

bite my tongue 'till it falls right off
its the tailgate on that fane barbwire 
trace the windshield as we drove for miles 
spurn the sauder on the backing line
and i swear i saw you standing at the edge 

and it was beautiful 
and it was beautiful 
and it was beautiful 
and it was beautiful 

forget it, forget it, the day is done
forget it, forget it, you saved it once
i get it, i get it, you've frayed and rubbed the velvet off your antlers

and it was beautiful 
and it was beautiful 

forget it, forget it, the day is done
forget it, forget it, you saved it once
i get it, i get it, you've frayed and rubbed the velvet off your antlers

always were

I ran home cuz I thought I was fired
And man all these joints are tired
And I said “wait” I was waiting for a serenade
Tell me everything about your damn day
Lay me out front if you threw a grenade
So why?
Do I seem distracted to you?
It’s beautiful to lay awake in my eyes

So watch it all be enough for you to take in
Watch it all be enough for you to let in
I tried to face the great divide
It only tired me out

11.6.23

The Great Divide

thank you for listening, as always

dedicated to sol, my great grandmother and martin

I’ve been thinking about the autochrome
Kids huddled on the stair by the second story window
Watching people float
Peering through the banister in my great grandmother’s

(Home)
(Home)
(Home)
(Home)

I’ve lost all self control
What compels someone to fuse their naive tongue with a metal pole
So I pray that I will moult
And this flawless flesh will free itself from skin and from

(Bone)
(Bone)
(Bone)
(Bone)

Autochrome

made in 8 hours after thinking hard to myself for a while.
this project is in 7/4 (mb gang)

-lyrics-
**n33t and hidden contact talking**
**me recording myself in my room**

went far to see the sun rise
i saw her climb into the sky
if things go wrong its alright
i know it gets better with time

do you know what its like
to be cast aside (i know)
wanted to say so much more
im out to give the warmth

what can i do if its me
if things go wrong its alright
i know it gets better with time

what if its me

https://ffm.to/basalt 

cover art by noah greene https://temberl.in/

everything is different now
_________________________________

blood it crusts the mantle, sequence in stairs

tephra crests the marrow, applique if she cared

but you don't know me, you don't know me, you don't know me i won't open wide
but you don't know me, you don't know me, you don't know me and i'm terrified

and i told you that day, and the rust fell that may,
and the ash coned and the steel groaned saw your visage through the smoke one last time
now it's unrequited, wasn't your onus, thank god you were honest
I'll hull to the harbor i won't surrender what i had promised, won't embed it against you
but nothing can change the fact that i trust you
and nothing can change the fact that i love you

stare at the asphalt, refuse to bloom

won't cherish the basalt, a pyrrhic sige there 
backstitch the petiole, oblique she's the heir 

wading through traft bullaces solely reverie

can't rathe to rue it's ellipsis, who are we?

but you don't know me, you don't know me, you don't know me magma hit my eyes
but you don't know me, you don't know me, you don't know me and i'm terrified

faltered all at once the walls i'd woven pylons corrallings,

the fumaroles atoned it billowed oxidized recoiled on hem, i'm still terrified

but you don't know me, you don't know me, you don't know me whither watch it writhe
but you don't know me, you don't know me, you don't know me whither watch it writhe
but you don't know me, you don't know me, you don't know me and i'm terrified

vain to scrape the tungsten, abjured alloy, but I'm just like them, no I'm just like them




contains vocal samples by https://www.youtube.com/@SouliaSora

basalt

world designer, storyboarder, instrumentalist

don't look down

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