a weird memory of mine with this song: i slept to this song once and i had a weird dream with it. i was watching some show my mind made up in my dream and towards the end of it, two guys came up on the screen to sing this song in the exact voice luna has. there was a view of forest on the screen and until i woke up, those two guys sang this song over and over. i was very fascinated with the dream once i woke up and realized what happened.

they said it feels just like catharsis
but more short-lived and less concise
i guess it could have been my ego
i couldn’t trust that they were right

my youth walked a fine line: she would etch it afternoons
plan a path around the casket she imagined as her doom 
walked so many fine lines, they wove a web—then a cocoon,
then a sheet set so cozy i could never leave my room

i was ebenezer scrooge in the bad mood phase
skipping class just to bask in the bathroom breaks
the panache everlast like tuck, but the tattoo's fake
all's well that turns bad moods great

i don't believe much in actual fate
it's fun to pretend that there's some magical weight
but i don't put much into actual fate
maybe in the back of my brain... sometimes

they said it feels just like catharsis
but more short-lived and less concise
they said it feels just like catharsis
i couldn’t trust that they were right

they said it feels just like catharsis
they said it feels just like catharsis

5.B 205 • Merci pour Ta Parole

awake

"mirage" is a song by my new band contact high five.

we'll record/release it eventually!

mirage (demo)

"effigy" (demo/preview)

sample: it looks sad - creature

i saw you in the window of my room
i saw you in the window of my room last night again
i screamed, "please don't go" at you
but those fragile bones still seemed to move so fast
and i know it hurts to hear
but i'm just no god damn good, my dear
i promise you i would not lie
i die to live and live to die

no one ever told me what the words feel like
no one ever told me what the words felt like
when you're asleep in empathy
and i'm awake in entropy

i met you in the parking lot outside of the high school
breathing in the fumes from cigarettes and trying to act cool
you asked me "do you hate yourself? i can tell you fit the part"
i said "self loathing? listen, just don't even start"
can't put into words the way that you intimidated me
was fighting with a mirror over which side was the fakery
we shared our stories, showed our scars
made that promise, crashed your car

no one ever told me what the words feel like
no one ever told me what the words felt like
when you're asleep inside a ditch
passenger seat, i lie and twich 'cause
no one ever told me what the words feel like
no one ever told me what the words felt like
i watched you die and spoke your name
but neither of us felt the same

NO ONE EVER TOLD ME

abracadabra

olive jacket, magenta hair
pale skin with a piercing stare
you see through my eyes to my brain
swallowed whole by an empty void
wondered if i'd be destroyed
but somehow you saved me from it

speak in tongues through a speakerphone
never see what i need to know
i always just do at the end
question morals and need support
swapping spit in a pillow fort
i'm drunk on a sunday again

i'm fading out
but i'll open up
at least i would
but i'm frozen shut
god damn

white lies on the telephone
might cry if i make it home
but something tells me that i won't
water bottle of alcohol
on my teacher's desk in a middle school
we all must find our escapes

broken clasp on a cookie jar
empty cabinets, looking hard
for something to eat in this place
going hungry or maybe starving
myself because i hate who i am
oh, i do, oh yes, i do

i'm fading out
but i'll open up
at least i would
but i'm frozen shut
god damn

i'm fading out
but i'll open up
at least i would
but i'm frozen shut
god damn

frozen shut

a song that functions as a coping mechanism

maybe i'll leave home today and drive or walk around
i could meet some friends for dinner at a restaurant downtown
but something tells me it's a bad idea to outside
that little voice inside my head that whispers "you might die"

maybe i'll get out of bed and go down to the store
i could buy a couple candy bars or bleed out on the floor
i'm so prone to accidents and awkward little habits
i don't wanna leave my room, i wanna hide out in my attic

i am afraid of everything
i run away from everything

i think i'll go out tonight, and maybe see a movie
'cause there's so much to fear in life, but also so much beauty
i know that my condition is difficult, alright
but i'm sick of letting all my friends believe that they're disliked

so i'm gonna leave my house today
i'm gonna say all that i need to say
and i'll talk to strangers and compliment them
to prove to myself that i'm strengthened again

i am okay with everything
i'll be okay through anything

anxiety; self-reliance

artwork was shot by mae <3 tysm

we keep drifting through these weekends
i keep wondering what's keeping
me away from ever speaking
properly in conversations

i can't swallow medication
you keep forgetting to take it
wonder how my name keeps ending
up in stranger's mouths

in all these conversations

nothing like anonymous comments
to make you feel like everything's fading out
i'm not waiting, i'm not waiting
for the sadness to go
too much time on my hands, yes
it's obvious that i am blessed
but something tells me i can't rest
until i find something good to do

i can't keep staying up all night
i can't keep waiting for daylight
i can't keep watching the sunrise
i can't keep hoping that something will rescue me

i can't keep staying up all night
i can't keep waiting for daylight
i can't keep watching the sunrise
i've gotta fix this shit now

been losing my friends and severing ties
we walked to the ending and said our goodbyes
but somehow, no matter the passage of time
they always fucking talk about me

conversations

split betwixt patrick and i !

download: 
https://themostbeautifulimages.bandcamp.com/album/split-with-tea

https://teatea.bandcamp.com/album/split-with-the-most-beautiful-images-created-to-be-destroyed

abracadabra

tea

Recent comments

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