haunting from the inside

ＹＯＵ　ＫＮＯＷ　ＴＨＡＴ　ＹＯＵ　ＭＥＡＮ　ＴＨＥ　
ＤＡＭＮ　ＷＯＲＬＤ　ＴＯ　ＭＥ

//私たちは奇妙です//

thank you guys so fucking much for the endless amount of support
we're reachin' milestones i never thought were possible
it's only uphill from here
i love you ♡

https://genius.com/guardin-guardin-x-yung-van-lets-just-keep-walking-lyrics

cover art by chunniboy
be sure to give him lots of love
https://goo.gl/asxd7w

ＦＯＬＬＯＷ　ＹＵＮＧ　ＶＡＮ

guardin x yung van - let's just keep walking

Ｉ　ＤＯＮ＇Ｔ　ＴＨＩＮＫ　Ｉ＇Ｍ　ＲＥＡＬ

//私の軌道の悪魔//

i can't thank you guys enough for the endless amount of love & support you've given me since the start. i never thought in a million years we'd be where we're at right now & it's crazy to me that we still continue to grow. it's always been a release for me to let loose on a track & hear what you guys think of it. it's always been for the people & for myself. i love waking up every morning & reading every single comment, every single message, etc. you guys put the biggest fucking smiles on my face & i hope you all know i'm here for you as much as you're here for me. i've struggled with my anxiety & depression for years & to know a lot of you are going through the same things is somewhat comforting. we're in this together. i couldn't do any of this without you guys. we're gonna strive & do great things, i promise. don't let your demons get the best of you. i hope you enjoy this one. i love you

check out the music video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtv87HVgnpo&t=1s

art by chunniboy
be sure to give him lots of love
goo.gl/asxd7w

music video

demons in my orbit

ＡＬＩＥＮＡＴＥＤ　ＦＲＯＭ　
ＡＬＬ　ＴＨＡＴ　ＩＳ　ＲＥＡＬ

//お祝い//

i just wanted to thank you guys so much for helping me reach 3k on here as well as 1k on youtube. i never thought anything would get to this level. i've got big things planned for the remainder of this year, so stay tuned. i love you guys.

also, genius won't lemme post the lyrics to this one for some reason, so here they are

ＬＹＲＩＣＳ

i don't wanna fade away
pour that liquor for my bae
we just wanna celebrate
gettin' faded fly away
stackin' plays all day 
stackin' plays all
i don't wanna lose faith
in everything I'm doing great
cause all i do is hate
on myself, what i create 
got the man in the mirror lookin, blank
got the man lookin' blank

lost in my head 
counter intuitive 
making a mess 
you know how i'm doing it
i'm caught in a web
twistin' the thread till my thoughts are all dead 
all of my friends live inside of my head  
some of them under my bed
fuck what they said
imma make my dreams come true
fuck the anxiety, depression too 
20 already & feelin so blue
imma just fight till I cop me a coupe
whippin' my wrists like i know what it do
sparkin' that spliff watchin' halloween 2
baby you makin' me feel so brand new
constantly shifting my hue
i just want you in my life for a life time
baby girl you are my enzyme
breakin' my walls, yeah i rise & i fall
& i'm blowin' these clouds as a pastime 
run with the feelings i feel
my mind is not so ideal 
shaking his hand to reveal
i'm grippin' the steel
alienated from all that is real 
i do not feel
anything that you fulfill
runnin' the game with my skill 
you think you know me, yeah you never will
i am the canvas & you are the frill
you oughta chill
destroy you bitches i will 
fuck with the set cause it's trill 
you've just been sleeping on me cause i'm ill
sweepin' on me like a spill
i'm whatchu feel


yeah you're wasting my time 
with your pretty little lies
i can see it in your eyes
& we all wanna die
but the devil's too shy
i don't wanna testify
you're the perfect lullaby 
tuck me in when i cry
fall asleep, you & i
got me feelin' so high 
like a spirit in the sky
never good with goodbye 
i don't want that
pretty baby maybe you could come solve that
run away, gone astray, i don't know man
in my veins, numb the pain when you come back

ＦＯＬＬＯＷ　ＦＵＳＩＯＮ

lovesick lullaby (prod. by neverday)

Ｉ＇Ｍ　Ａ　ＰＲＯＤＵＣＴ　ＯＦ　ＴＨＥ　ＳＥＡＳＯＮＳ
ＷＨＥＮ　ＴＨＥ　ＷＥＡＴＨＥＲ　ＤＯＥＳＮ＇Ｔ　ＣＨＡＮＧＥ

//私に戻って来てください//

follow young taylor

fate (prod. by young taylor)

Ｉ　ＷＡＳ　ＳＯ　ＬＯＳＴ　ＩＮ　ＹＯＵ
ＴＨＡＴ　Ｉ　ＬＯＳＴ　ＭＹＳＥＬＦ

//私がいなくなったら後悔するよ//

i wanted to release a lil' something for you guys as a thank you for everything you've done for me. a year ago, i was just a kid in my bedroom trying to figure out himself. fucking around with beats all day, smoking weed all night. i was depressed. hell, i'm still depressed & sometimes it feels like i don't know myself anymore, but this music has been the only thing that has made complete sense to me since the start & to know i'm helping you guys all whilst you help me is beyond beautiful. i'm so lucky to be where i'm at today. to be alive with all of you in my life. don't ever tell yourself that you won't amount to anything cause you're worth much more than you'll tell yourself & i promise once you find something you're truly passionate about and you dive deep into it, you'll feel a sense of purpose. there you'll find happiness. don't ever give up on yourself. i won't give up on you.

i love you

follow hateful

trafalgar (prod. by hateful)

follow kodoku

elephants (prod. by kodoku)

Ｉ＇ＬＬ　ＲＵＮ　ＳＯ　ＦＡＲ　ＦＲＯＭ　
ＴＨＥＳＥ　ＳＨＡＤＯＷＳ

//私の心の断片//

lyrics
-------
i think i'd be better off alone 
without you 
i don't mind when i sleep all alone
without you 

i think i found the antidote
i think i found another road
i think i found some fucking hope
nope
i think i'm tryna find a way
to rid of all these darker days
but my minds trapped inside a maze 

so i'll run so far from these shadows
makeshift but my hearts still fragile
i'd drown but the waters too shallow
my heads still caught in the gallows
your kiss is my remedy
i fall to the ground so desperately
baby i know that you're mad at me
filling all the voids like cavities 

i think i'd be better off alone 
without you 
i don't mind when i sleep all alone
without you 
i think i'd be better off alone 
without you 
i don't mind when i sleep all alone
without you 

i guess this feeling lasts forever
i guess we'll never be together
you're colder than i can remember
but the ice is melting quickly 
i'm still wishing that you'd miss me

but you're gone and i never could replace you
mistraced new face but it ain't you
rebuilding the forts that i made you
no love but my hearts tryna break thru
my chest cause its caving in
i dwell in a cell in a realm of sin
six shots to the face of rum & gin
i'm dead in the head so i guess you win 

i think i'd be better off alone 
without you 
i don't mind when i sleep all alone
without you

solitary

Ｉ＇Ｍ　ＡＦＲＡＩＤ　ＯＦ　ＤＩＡＬ　ＴＯＮＥＳ

//私たちは病気です//

three weeks till outsider. i hope this holds you guys over till then & i hope you all are having a great week. i love you <3

show some luv to the homie @mewsyc

check out the music video <3
https://youtu.be/viPhOnb73jk

lyrics
-------
summer's dead 
the winter fed my ignorance & left me cold
in my head you toss and turn 
my jacket pockets full of gold

all i know is i was comfortable 
but comfort only stays as long as you are home 

as long as you are home (x4)

always said i wish my head
would stop pretending i'm alone 
i could call but i don't want to
i'm afraid of dial tones 

all i know is i was comfortable
but comfort only stays as long as you are home 

as long as you are home (x4)

follow mewsyc

home (prod. by mewsyc)

prod. by @guardinmusic

lyrics
--------
i see them looking at me
from right outside of my window
i see the monsters that creep
they lurk when i'm sparking my indo
holding the smoke till i choke i won't breathe till they exit my airways
coping by hoping tomorrow is better i dwell in the stairway 

fuck it i just wanna drive
i love the feeling of feeling alive
do you ever contemplate suicide?
falling asleep on his shoulder while i
cry in my pillow alone in my bed
smother the sounds of the voice in my head
losing my voice so i speak with a pen
writing agendas so i can pay rent

this is my life
this is not shit you could cut with a knife
no tension here but the stress is as thick as the buds
i've been breaking & smoking all night
why do i write all about me?
why can't you see all the things that i see?
am i alive? is my brain just pullin' tricks on me?
get out alive or just live in a dream

sorry i suck
i'm full of shit i do not give a fuck
i've got disorders in folders inside of me tucked
undiagnosed but i know i am fucked
up in my head
writing about it again & again
it's getting hard to write songs about flowers 
when showers are cold & my phone's always dead

i think that i'm fine
when i'm alone in my
bed with my bong packed tight
my throat's been sore all night
sip that water quick
before you might get sick
tacks and thorns will prick
my words will never stick

shadow

prod. by @partysmartie

lyrics
--------
lie to me 
i think i finally 
struck a chord violently
ripped it right out the seams
hide and seek
they found another body by the creek 
the killers out on a spree
i'm afraid of everything i see

there's a ghost inside my bedroom 
at least i'm not alone but i can just pretend to
be awake with everything that i attend to
or sleep the day away & probably offend you 
i don't wanna waste another minute 
i can see the voices in your head don't wanna listen
the light reflects the glass you turn to dust & start to glisten 
kissin' you inside your bed is something i've been fuckin' missing
 
at night I turn my fears into my art 
crept inside my chest & ripped my beating heart apart 
i'll be wheezing coughing up their blood my demons will depart
imma add em up & drag em to the basement where i start
fix myself with bandages and roaches from last week
i've been searching for a purpose in some sugar coated sweets 
take a swisher & i crack it in the middle of the street
i could spark another thirty i'm not leavin' till i peak

lie to me 
i think i finally 
struck a chord violently
ripped it right out the seams
hide and seek
they found another body by the creek 
the killers out on a spree
i'm afraid of everything i see

follow partysmartie

by the creek (prod. by partysmartie)

spotify

im good at being lonely cant u tell

ＴＨＥ　ＶＯＩＣＥＳ　ＩＮ　ＭＹ　ＨＥＡＤ　ＣＯＬＬＩＤＥ

//私は私の心を失った//

i recently purchased a new ukulele after i gave mine away back in november, so i thought it'd only make sense to whip up a fresh uke track for you guys. i hope you enjoy it. 

i love you <3

lyrics
--------
this song brings on the weather
tear drops upon my sweater
i cry in bed whenever
i see you guys together
fuck love it's all a lie
i can't sleep i rather die
than see that look in your eye
it sucks that i'm not your guy

i think you're really cool like
i think you're really cool like
i think you're really cool like
i think you're really cool like

i packed my bags last week
sunrise and i'm on my feet
let's skip town and chase our dreams
cause this place ain't what it seems
come home let's synchronize
my soft lips caress your thighs
you get me so fucking high
the voices in my head collide 

i think you're really cool like
i think you're really cool like
i think you're really cool like
i think you're really cool like

keep your voice down
she don't care no
i can't breathe i've got no air 
no sympathy for my despair
i cut my wrists and grow my hair 
i'm outta my mind

i think you're really cool

ＴＨＥ　ＷＡＹ　ＴＨＡＴ　ＳＨＥ　ＴＡＬＫＳ　
ＭＡＫＥＳ　ＴＨＥ　ＮＩＧＨＴ　ＤＡＮＣＥ

//落ちるのを恐れる//

i've been feeling some type of way recently. i don't know what to call it.

s/o young taylor
click that link up there & check him out 

thanks for 13k <3

lyrics
--------
how you gonna say that you like that
just to walk away when the tide casts
just to disappear well the forecast 
is cloudy today but the way that she talks makes the night dance 
girl you're an angel from hell
bad to the bone baby i couldn't tell
ooo mamasita she sweet to the cell
she on my dick cause i look like drake bell
whisper my name 
grippin' your neck & i'm slappin' your face
pull on your hair as i slide your panties off your waist
sit on my lips cause i love how you taste 
baby girl just take off on my rocket 
when you pop it back you better lock it 
we could spark the jay inside my pocket
fuck all night & we ain't ever stoppin'

got a feelin this is it 
got me feelin like a kid
spark another in a bit too high i'll admit 
rollie rollie rollie rollie rollie rollie on my wrist
jk maybe ravioli in my dish

i'm never hungry 
only for pussy and money 
i thought that bar was so funny 
i'm still laughin' like a dummy 
nothing makes sense to me lately 
stuck in my room someone save me 
i'm a fiend cause this weed got me shaky 
smoking it daily 
cause i cop big bands 
and i got big plans
and i can not stand you
being this far away
from the shit that you say 
that you think that you can't do 
just try a little harder and you'll see
turn your dreams into reality 
fuck the hate and negativity 
i believe in creativity

so when the sun comes up will you be here in the morning
love
x2

i can't sleep without you in my bed
and lately you've been wandering inside of my head 
so maybe i'm falling all over again
and i fear you'll leave me for one of your friends

lately (prod. by young taylor)

Ｉ　ＤＯＮ＇Ｔ　ＴＨＩＮＫ　Ｉ＇ＬＬ　ＥＶＥＲ
ＧＥＴ　Ａ　ＣＡＬＬ　ＢＡＣＫ

//誰も長く滞在しない//

i keep looking for love in all the wrong places. maybe one day things will be different.

lyrics
--------
and i know that you want me to leave
but it's cool cause we're through and i'm high in the trees
i escape with a vape cause the smoke stains my teeth
yes i know that i probably talk in my sleep
probably talk in my sleep when we kiss i awake
but i'm dreaming again it was all fuckin' fake
and i'm thinkin' too much of the way that you taste
cause the flavor of you isn't one to replace
and i think imma waste

more time scrollin' down my timeline
wish that i could hop up in my whip and go to five guys
somethings gotta give when i'm sky high
i'm not something super in the uber playin' i spy
disappear from everybody for a while
cause the air is getting thick within the radius of miles
suicide is on my mind & i can't bare to even smile
i can only get a taste cause happiness is versatile

and i know that you want me to leave
but it's cool cause we're through and i'm high in the trees
i escape with a vape cause the smoke stains my teeth
yes i know that i probably talk in my sleep
probably talk in my sleep when we kiss i awake
but i'm dreaming again it was all fuckin' fake
and i'm thinkin' too much of the way that you taste
cause the flavor of you isn't one to replace
and i think that i

probably could've tried harder
i tend to fall in love too quick with everybody's daughter
take my heart and they begin to slaughter
i'm a fuckin' wreck and my neck is lookin' like every other
boy that they've been bruisin' for a bit
i've been smooth cruisin' catalytic tendencies are in
love is just a four letter word that don't mean shit
cause i open up a bit too much & they just wanna dip

they just always fall back
i don't think i'll ever get a call back
why the fuck i go through all that
just for what we had to fuckin' fall flat

in my sleep

Ｉ　ＴＨＩＮＫ　Ｉ　ＮＥＥＤ　ＡＮＯＴＨＥＲ　ＬＩＧＨＴ

//それを明るくする//

follow the homie taylor morgan 
@taylor

lyrics
--------
addicted
yeah i'm fucked up
sick of loving someone new
i'll fix it
no i won't but
at least i try and try until
you drop me back off at my house
and i call up my friends and they all gotta bounce
all alone with an ounce
imma smoke till i cry
with my eyes to the sky
i got you on my mind girl

i got you on my mind girl
& this time i'll rewind till you're my girl
life sucks waking up let my mind whirl
scroll down on your page & i might hurl
i hate when i do this to myself
write about a girl that's detrimental to my health
lost inside a state of mind where talkings only hell
and the closer that we get i lose my grip and start to yell 
i lose my shit quite often off in august on my cell
when i hit you up and told you that i'm outside of my shell
i hate the way you say you're fine
and i can tell it's just a lie
i'd wipe the tears right out your eyes
but we've already met our demise
so

addicted
yeah i'm fucked up
sick of loving someone new
i'll fix it
no i won't but
at least i try and try until
you drop me back off at my house
and i call up my friends and they all gotta bounce
all alone with an ounce
imma smoke till i cry
with my eyes to the sky
i got you on my mind girl

i'm not your enemy
i'm just a boy
you've got your friends
you say you're doing fine
but i can tell you're wrong despite
the way he kisses you at night
your smile shines so fucking bright
i think i need another light

addicted
yeah i'm fucked up
sick of loving someone new
i'll fix it
no i won't but
at least i try and try until
you drop me back off at my house
and i call up my friends and they all gotta bounce
all alone with an ounce
imma smoke till i cry
with my eyes to the sky
i got you on my mind girl

follow taylor morgan

addicted (prod. by taylor morgan)

ＴＵＲＮ　ＡＲＯＵＮＤ　＆　ＷＡＬＫ　ＡＬＯＮＥ

//私は十分に話していない//

lyrics
--------
when she goes i kiss her on the nose
tell her i love her so
turn around and walk alone
when she goes i smoke till i implode
coughing till i'm a ghost
i'm swimming to the coast 
where am i going
full of disgrace and self loathing
i cannot sleep without you in my sheets
so i stay up all night just hoping
that you come back but there's nothing
i guess i'm wishing for something
lost in a love with a girl whose a dove
and a crow of a boy that's been bluffing

i am just nothing
i am just nothing

when she goes i pick another rose
rip petals till i don't
that's just the way it goes 
when she cries i write another note
put it inside her coat
start clearin' out my throat

i never talk enough baby
trip over words like i'm crazy

follow taurusmoon

when she goes (prod. by taurusmoon)

room to breathe

ＨＯＷ　ＤＩＤ　ＷＥ　
ＤＥＳＴＲＯＹ　ＥＡＣＨ　ＯＴＨＥＲ？

//私たちは病気です//

tysm to @jvbeats666 for creating this beauty with me
go show him some luv 

lyrics
--------
whiskey pour another cup
nothing like the feeling of getting so fucked up
off the last lost breath of a lover that you once
had but she ran with a man much better than yourself
i think i need help
i think i can touch the sky & grip orion's belt
taking off my vans full of sand and some shells
heaven ain't the place for me but i can hear the bells

they say that an angel is self defined 
so when i describe
the girl that lost her mind
the sky will probably cry
but the rain won't mind
if you cry too
feel alive when the sky makes the clouds move
raindrops fall but i fall harder 
light reflects off the water in the harbor
i don't care to compare what i'm told
to what i believe cause i'm still all alone


i've been tryna get back home
but i don't know which road
to take before i can awake from this nightmare
i'm cold
all alone
got the wind straight blowin' in my face i can feel it in my bones
if i smoke
will the clouds lift my body from this place cause i don't feel at home

what's a home without a lover
what's a road without another
how did we destroy each other
how did we destroy each other

follow jay vee

all alone (prod. jay vee)

ＹＯＵ　ＣＯＵＬＤ　ＮＯＴ　ＴＡＫＥ　
ＴＨＩＳ　ＡＷＡＹ　ＦＲＯＭ　ＭＥ

//安定したあなたの呼吸//

i can't begin to thank you guys enough for everything we've accomplished, even just this year alone. i never imagined i would reach this point, but i am incredibly grateful of it & i promise it's only up from here. i'm sorry for a lack of releases lately, but i've kept busy with touring & meeting all of you beautiful people & i can't wait to do it again with these tours comin' up next year. i love you guys.

merry christmas <3

lyrics
--------
now that i'm back on the road
you're in your bed all alone
it's alright i'm doing okay
and in my mind you're in the doorway
now that i'm back in my zone
i smoke till my seams come unsewn
you could not take this away from me
you could not take this away from me
work so damn hard on my own
sit in my bedroom alone
i did this shit all in one take
you could not touch what i'm on mate
steady your breathing it's cold
and your eyes are made out of coal
crying but your tears are snowflakes
and this car that's comin' got no breaks

i've been livin' my life to the fullest
anxiety comes but it won't sit 
got tossed in the bag but it won't zip
cause i killed my mind all in one hit
blast to the past & i feel it
the days we put stars on our ceilings
the tape on my hearts always peeling
and i do not find that appealing
so maybe i
contemplate strategize ways to ease my mind
sit awake and i bake all through the night
touch base with your face being close to mine
and maybe you
can't sleep cause your dreams never seem to soothe
so you spark in the dark tryna make your move
touch me & i fall but i play it cool

(lost in your embrace and i'm longing for your taste love
said we'd runaway but you hardly ever say much)

now that i'm back on the road
you're in your bed all alone
it's alright i'm doing okay
and in my mind you're in the doorway
now that i'm back in my zone
i smoke till my seams come unsewn
you could not take this away from me
you could not take this away from me
work so damn hard on my own
sit in my bedroom alone
i did this shit all in one take
you could not touch what i'm on mate
steady your breathing it's cold
and your eyes are made out of coal
crying but your tears are snowflakes
and this car that's comin' got no breaks

snowflakes

ＹＯＵ＇ＲＥ　ＴＯＯ　ＦＵＣＫＩＮＧ
ＧＯＯＤ　ＦＯＲ　ＭＥ

//あなたのために欲望//

lyrics
--------
lust always a problem
you could never solve it
i can never get the fuck away from what i think 
if she tryna come though
i could make her cum so
baby is it him you really want or is it me? 
this ain't ever work nah
this'll never work out
don't you know that you are way too fucking good for me?
if she ever calls back
i hope that she knows that
i could never see all of the good she sees in me (x2)
you're too fuckin' good for me (x3)

let's kiss up on eachother 
biting on your neck while you're thinking about another
love is lost in lust and girl you know we crave eachother
when the time we have is gone the memories will cluster 

lust always a problem
you could never solve it
i can never get the fuck away from what i think 
if she tryna come though
i could make her cum so
baby is it him you really want or is it me? 
this ain't ever work nah
this'll never work out
don't you know that you are way too fucking good for me?
if she ever calls back
i hope that she knows that
i could never see all of the good she sees in me (x2)
you're too fuckin' good for me (x3)

haunting from the inside

THRAXWYDHERE