We’re back with the music video about a game studio that brought us a variety of classics, but never released any game with number 3 in its name — VALVE. The company behind Half-Life, Portal, Counter-Strike, Team Fortress, Left 4 Dead, DOTA 2 and much more. 

ELLEN MCLAIN, the original voice of GLaDOS from “Portal” and “Portal 2”, agreed to sing the part of everyone's favourite mad robot. 

THE STUPENDIUM, the amazing nerdcore artist who you know and love, performed the Gabe Newell’s part! 

And finally, we got Valve’s CEO, GABE NEWELL himself, to record a couple of lines for the beginning and the end of the song!

released March 29, 2021 
“Count to Three” by 
THE CHALKEATERS 

Executive producer / songwriter: 
Alios

Sound producer / lead arranger / engineer: 
Masel

Arranger / guitars / choir production: 
Ergy

Lead artist / art director: 
Pondis

Lead animator / video composer: 
Lenich

Character animator: 
Yumi the Cat 

Gabe Newell vocals: The Stupendium
GLaDOS vocals: Ellen McLain (original voice of GLaDOS) 
Alyx vocals: Holly Turton 

Supporting arranger / piano: Dmitry Kovzel 
Drums: Matias Menarguez 
Trumpet: Bruno Brito 
Saxophones: Weber Marely 
Trombone: Felipe Coelho 
Supporting artists: Hunternif, Koldan Grey, Freskovich, QuietVictories 

Choir: Hineko, Vasya, Martie, Chaos Angel, tooi_cat, Venix, Walter, Dmitry Litvinov, Tsumikashi, Lenich, Ergy, Dmitry Kovzel, Nikdoge, Felya, Jerico, Choki, Finch under cover, BertyDahlia, Victor Bird 

Mastered by Stuart Hawkes at Metropolis Studios 

Special thanks to: 
Gabe Newell and Michael ‘Lewi’ Lewington for recording Gabe’s awesome cameo! 
Erik Wolpaw for allowing us to use Valve’s characters for the song! 
Jamie Lopez, Wendi Wills, Tom McGurk for helping us to get Ellen on board 
Bill Van Buren for helping us with the GLaDOS voice 
ZhenyaHacker, Kizuru and Martie for being our favourite test subjects 
Vasya, Nikita Dobrinskiy, Chaos Angel for great ideas and overall support

Count To Three (feat. The Stupendium and Ellen McLain)

PepsiMan With Lyrics. [ By Man on The Internet ]

The Most Fashionable Faction - TF2 Rap by Stupendium

ALL CREDIT GOES TO SINGING TINY DESK ENGINEER ON YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@singingtinydeskengineer
Check out his channel, he deserves recognition for this!

I just wanted to upload it because I think it sounds better than the original lmao.

Engineer Sings About Valve Not Making A Major TF2 Update — Singing Tiny Desk Engineer

A song about a big, big man, and the city inside of him.

Mastered by Angel Marcloid at Angel Hair Audio: https://www.angelhairaudio.com/
Guest vocals by:
- The Stupendium: https://www.youtube.com/@TheStupendium
- Chi-Chi: https://www.youtube.com/@ChichiAi
- GatoPaint: https://www.youtube.com/@GatoPaint
Artwork currently the main album art by DeadlyComics, will be replaced once song-specific artwork is finalized.

Lyrics:
City inside of a big, big man
Travelling the world in a short timespan
He drinks Alaskan water
To save the crops in Florida
Since it goes through the city in the big, big man
Dubai can't compete with the height that he stands
His kidneys ain't much cleaner
But the real estate is cheaper
So I'm moving to the city in the big, big man
(Moving to the city in the big, big man)
But why is there a city in a big, big man?
(Why is there a city in a big, big man?)

It all began in ancient times like any other day
Then suddenly the nearby mountains all melted away
At first they thought the end was nigh
That it marked their last goodbyes
Until they saw the big, big baby's hand reach for the skies

They were a little bit concerned
How'll he avoid getting sunburned?

So they got to work a-testin'
Figure out how he came to be
The results were inconclusive
An eternal mystery
So they did what they thought was best
And built little homes inside
And as he grew and learned to walk
The town came for the ride

You ask me "Why the hell did they build a town?"
I don't know, nobody ever wrote it down
Honestly, where do you get off asking me these stupid questions?
It's not that hard to wrap your head around
Around

Everybody with us? Good! With me, ladies and gentlemen, thank you!

Welcome to the tour
We're here to see the sights
Please take a brochure
And waivers for your rights (Uh, yeah, just sign there? Perfect)

The airport's in the lungs
(As I'm sure you knew)
Emergency's the heart
(But not the fire crew)
There's nothing on the tongue (But I have got a lot of buds over there)
(Not since '82)
And that's all just to start

We're using the nervous system today
To facilitate the tour
But when you need the subway, that's the bloodstream
(No prison, but we do have lots of cells)
The government's working hard in the brain
Yeah, of that, you can be sure
But we don't know what's going on in the spleen
(Absolutely no idea)

Excuse me, please
You need to sit down

Alright everybody, you know what to do! Money in the bag, let's go!
Hey!

No alarms, no alarms
Stay calm, stay calm
We're here for your money
No need for harm
Stay calm, stay calm
We just want your money

We've been counting all the days since the appendicitis took out all the condos
It's gotten harder and harder to see a future when the present that we got blows
Gentrification ain't helping
This city just ain't the melting pot that you wish it was
So that's why we're here today
To show you things aren't okay and that we have a cause

So stay calm, stay calm
Note that we're all armed
And here for your money
(Stay calm, stay calm)
(No need for harm)
(We're here for your money)
All the bills seem there
We'll get out of your hair
And thanks for the money
(Hope you have a nice day)
(We'll get out of your way)
(And thanks for the money)

I'm a rebellious teen
Who broke away from the group
What don't they want to be seen?
I think it's time for a snoop
I thought I'd check in the gills
But they're not part of the genus
Looks like I'll need all my skills
To sneak into the pancreas

Security within the duct is slack
Despite the hidden door found in the back
A sign upon it reads "Here lies the soul"
I kick the whole door in; that's how I roll

(lol there are too many lyrics to fit in the description beyond this point sorry)

City Inside of a Big, Big Man (feat. The Stupendium, Chi-Chi, & GatoPaint)

Song was made by The Stupendium. Show them some love on YouYube!

The House Always Wins by The Stupendium  (2023 Remaster) [Fallout New Vegas]

Dickens cider - Matt storer

The Balatro Song by The Stupendium, now without an intro or outro

NUMBER GO UP ｜ Balatro Song! - The Stupendium (no intro or outro)

Featured Artist Dandre Washington performs a searing verse that hits the soul!

BLACK MESSIAH

Have your mind blown by the fantastic original song of 'I Expect You To Die,' a VR escape-the-room puzzle game where you are a super spy.

Amazon
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01N10WWV8

Google Play
https://play.google.com/store/music/album/Schell_Games_I_Expect_You_to_Die?id=By7ieduwer6wzx7suyrcu35yywm

iTunes
https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/i-expect-you-to-die-single/id1195181982?app=itunes&ign-mpt=uo%3D4

Spotify
https://play.spotify.com/album/0s7eoBfsWDNsFLnPJ40t5F?play=true&utm_source=open.spotify.com&utm_medium=open


Composers: Tim Rosko, Bonnie Bogovich, & Connor Fallon
Lyrics: Connor Fallon & Jared Mason
Lead Singer: Bonnie Bogovich
The Yinzer Singers (choir): Emily Swora, Anna Ciaccio, George Milosh, Tim Rosko
Violin: Garrett Overcash
Trumpet: John Robert Matz
Percussion: Doug Perry
Orchestration: Tim Rosko
Recording, Mixing, & Mastering: Jesse Naus & Red Caiman Media, Pittsburgh, PA

I Expect You To Die Original Song Dec 2016

The Official christmas carol of 2014 ripped from youtube cause no one uploaded it here...(or atleast not ear rapped) enjoy heisters

Dickens cider - Matt storer

Sol’grum