Nova - DUMB (Rest In Paradise)

aftertheparty ~ 7.1 (Unreleased, Throwaway)

and im too gone to know if im okay

so close my eyes and keep my mind opaque 
you like my smile, i love to look away
and some will come, all will go away
and the sun will come, i'll just go away

what i don't
is all i want

opaque

all my time
all my time, you won't stay up?

one more time
sounded good on paper

i still want all of your faults
i'll give you all of my days
i still want all of your faults
you know it's on your face
you know i know by now

all your little

ig post

things

7UP

go ahead do it pussy, know you fucking wont
i've been off this purple, off this fucking dope
yeah i'm back off 30's i just fucking float
this a 42 pushing through the coat

pill feels like a hug 
like im in this 60's
i can feel the love 
this shit pure no cuts
i'm just having fun now

20/20 vision
seeing through this shit like its 7up
like i got a barcode on my head cause i might kill them all
i thought that i told you, i guess not, you are not involved
i thought that i told you pour that in, make that shit revolve
i thought that i told you i can't split that up no à la carte
i know that i ghosted honestly i just don't have the heart
keyless shit i hop in push the brake the only way it start
keyed up shit OB just got me chalked up like im fucking bart
money shit i pass my phone and tell her scroll and add to cart
you not shit we know that's some DH that's not no audemars
acting up we know you're bitch now shut up and go play your part
bitch im on my time i pop that back thats why im going hard

you can't be for real dog, you can't be for real
we got beef for real dog, we've gotta be for real
we eat what we kill dog, eyes thats in the hills

go ahead do it pussy, know you fucking wont
i've been off this purple, off this fucking dope
yeah i'm back off 30's i just fucking float
this a 42 pushing through the coat

BREATHE

only getting worse, i just can't let this shit breathe
only getting worse, i just can't let this shit breathe
only getting worse, i just can't let this fucker breathe
and i tried to let it go but i can't leave it be
wish i was a better man but i can't find no peace
i just gotta iron out whatever got me creased
even if i'm fucking dead you're gonna need a priest
and i read that shit so clear is that why you booked?
you've just been so idle with it so i'mma come and look
and you got me all worked up so now im fucking hooked
and i feel like gordon keep this heat up 'til its cooked

Aftertheparty Snippet 20240411.mp3

i want that all your nights
when you say "hold on close"
so i hold on
i'm wanting all your time
when you say "don't let go"
so i don't

i want you at your worst now
i want it like the others say

i want you at your worst now
i want it like the others say
you told me that i'm out of time
you wanna do it anyway?
i want you at your worst now
i want it like the others say
you told me that i'm out of time
you wanna

3:45 when we got back
365 we can get to it
clothes are the stairs, are you into it?
this a lot of talk i could put you through it
you can tell the difference when im runnin through it
any man in your phone go ahead and fucking lose it
trying to make me beg, way your body moving
trying to make me, huh

yeah
if you want to
if you need it
i don't want to talk about nothing no more
if you want to 
and you need it
just say what i want to hear
if you want to 
and you need it
i don't want to talk about nothing no more
if you want to
and you need it

want

oh i wanna hurt you bad even if it means no winning
who took you out your cloth, who put your ass on linen
oh i wanna say i meant it just so i can say i didn’t
i don’t wanna pull you back, i just wanna push you in it
and you cut me so damn deep, muscle fibres in it
oh i wanna hurt you bad even if it means no winning
oh i wanna say i meant it just so i can say i didn’t
i don’t wanna pull you back, i just wanna push you in it

and you know where this goes

took a long time to find out i was bleeding
in bed the light on your face from your phone
took a long time for my eyes to see it
somehow i was the last to know
color drain from your face when i read it
funny how fast you can learn how to mourn
better men would just move on and leave it
but better men i am not, i need to

know

was the gold not bright enough? diamonds never were clear enough?
did i hold you too close? guess you never adhered much
i couldn’t get a word, you said that i didn't hear much
too much baggage on me, i guess that i didn’t heal enough

was the gold not bright enough?
diamonds not clear enough?
do you care about anything? are you sure that you feel enough?
don’t look at the wall, are you sure that you’re here enough?
is that fair enough? guess we’ll see huh?

oh i wanna hurt you bad even if it means no winning
who took you out your cloth, who put your ass on linen
oh i wanna say i meant it just so i can say i didn’t
i don’t wanna pull you back, i just wanna push you in it
and you cut me so damn deep, muscle fibres in it
oh i wanna hurt you bad even if it means no winning
oh i wanna say i meant it just so i can say i didn’t
i don’t wanna pull you back, i just wanna push you in it

-

oh please, oh please, oh please
don’t go begging me
like what's the value on my time, but you can’t answer me?
i got a deadline to meet
how you so hurt at that?
maybe i’m looking too deep
maybe you sow what you reap
maybe you reap what you sow
maybe it’s worse if you know
you could just tell me to leave, but you know it’s harder alone
i know you’re used to the co
i learned dependence is weak
i wish i could let that one go, i can’t, but it’s like the leaves at my feet
in enough time it’ll grow
go on and look through the trees
go on and look through the smoke
maybe i’m looking too deep, but it go forever and more
go on and look through the trees
go on and look through the smoke
maybe i’m looking too deep, but it go forever and more
it go forever and more
it go forever and more
it go forever and more
it go forever and more

no winning

and i met you at a place that's gone now
can't believe never seen your face
when i heard you were held in the past
all that i could do was just wait
so i'd wait

look at all the years we've been
i say it's luck, you fate
look at all the time we've had
still hasn't even taken shape
hundred thousand years from now
still gonna feel the same

pick me up, blue luna
warm air hitting my face
watching as the sun goes down
no words by the lake
nosebleed seats i sit
walking across the stage
sign on the dotted line
place to place to place

and i met you at a place that's gone now
but it doesn't matter anyway
when i watched you as you walked through the trees
all that i could do was just wait
hands shake

look at all the years we've been
maybe it really was fate
look at the times we've had
still hasn't even taken shape
hundred thousand years from now
i'll still feel the same
still gonna feel the same
i'll still feel the same

and when i see her smile, i see you in her face
just wait

just wait

back to me, come back to me
you can cut that up but after me
it just hit my throat like guillotine
you pop that, but after me
come back to me, bring it to me
you can cut that up but after me
it just hit my throat like gasoline
back to me, back to

i'll get back to that another day
i can't think about another day
there's no time so i'm never late
same color but a different shade
never deal always walk away
i can't even look you in the face
and you wait on what i'm gonna say
i'll get back to that another day

you can't pick it up, play it where it lay
you can't pick it up, i can't cut a break
i got mouths to feed, i got bills to pay
maybe i'm too old and don't got shit to say no more
maybe you can tell me it's gonna be okay
do you think that it's gonna be okay?
now i've seen some shit so now i'm not the same
i can fix it all another day

back to me, come to me
you can cut that up but after me
it just hit my throat like gasoline
you can pop that shit but after me
come back to me, bring it to me
wonder if you'll think about it after me
maybe change is too big of an ask from me
maybe i just need another day

woods

back to me
back to me
back to me
wonder if you'll think about it after me
maybe change is too big of an ask from me
day after day after day i repeat

hold on, wrist automatic with the motion
you'll see it all your life but i know you'll never hold one
father figure type, put the phone down and go get it son
we can't take it light, lines hittin' with propulsion
put 'em in the pit, basket meet the lotion
we just pour the shit we do not care about proportion
we just throw the shit we do not care about where it's going
it don't even matter if i'm sinking or i'm floating

day after day after day i repeat
bet this shit look good but it ain't all what it seem
it just hit my throat like gasoline
bet this shit look good until it's right at your feet
day after day after day i repeat
day after day after day i repeat
maybe i just need another day

another day

"You should get a desk job
You should take some courses then you'll learn
Everything you didn't know
Then you can slow down what you burn
So fast
Too warm
Too fast
My God
So fast
You'll burn so fast"

Aftertheparty Snippet 20240411.mp3

IAmAyato