prod me
thanks to @emotegi
drawings: @ gardeniaa_a_a on IG

Sasaeng (+ emotegi)

@with3rx
@1yugenn
@misoo74



見つめないで
im sitting in ur room and tryna think of what to say
my mind is going blank
i tried to treat this life just like a game
now i dont wanna play
tryna figure out wtf happened to me
離れないで
dont act like u dont know i see it in ur face
i get so high i wonder if i'll sober in a day
i used to be  the 1 u tripped me up i fell in 2nd place
wtf happened to me?

another day its nothing new im a NEET
it feels like everybody's picking u over me
i get too high and i cant stand on my feet
is it really how u want this to be?
im just trying not to stumble or fall
im ignoring every text every call
i try to figure if its worth it at all
i try to figure if its worth it
bc i failed before i started
it didn't work out, at least i didn't try my hardest
walk up in the store swipe my card and tell em charge it
dirty drugs and shoes and my Miharas on the carpet
bc i failed before i started
it didn't work out, at least i didn't try my hardest
fucked it up again and now im begging for your pardont
fuck me up again i didn't think it would be harmless

wtf (@with3rx + @misoo74 + @1yugenn)

all audio by me / coverart also by me

🠟 lyrics 🠟

In each attempt...

Your symbol laid in the view of my path

And with every step that I took, with deft

If you weren’t beside me, I knew it wouldn’t be the last

Where do you believe were from?
And where do you think we’ll go, from here?

I wanna hear it all from you,
So tell me how you feel...

Don’t act like you know how this will go,

Will you leave me alone, when I need you close?

I knew
You see
Through me

I knew you could see through me...

You see some things that i cant see
Ohhh

Although sometimes,
You tire my mind

Im worried sick
Will she survive?

Just one more night
Just one more try

To grab this rope
Attempt to climb

Its yours to take
Your choice, not mine

Its not the end
You still have time

I see you’re trying for yourself this time,
And thats a better start

Trust me, no matter where we are
I'll hold your voice inside my heart.

Well, do you care if I bring it up?

Your presence weighs on me and its tough to look away

And when I sing of something else...

You keep on coming up,
No matter what i say...

Ohhh,
Well maybe thats okay

Where do you believe were from?
And where do you think we’ll go, from here?

I wanna hear it all from you,
So tell me how you feel...

Don’t act like you know how this will go,

Will you leave me alone, when I need you close?

I knew you could see through me

"caring hurts, but i cant turn it off..."

in grey

u could never, yeah i know

prod @stellathepixie & @sprigtek
feat @sprigtek

(pixie)
otherworldly 
politics 4 kids of foreign bodies 
smash me 2 the ground 
u stop my heartbeat
fucked my perception of things around me 
blush and ill bleed

razors, ivs
i am sick and god i know what’s waiting 
flowers underneath but my ribs r breaking
sleep n keep repeating in the backseat 
live while starving 

i won’t stay young and i haven’t been happy 
coz im trying so hard 2 want what u gave me
strawberry veins run w sugar n sweet tea
ill spit the blood back and savor the green sea

kiss my body, forcibly become relieved by me
u could never, yeah i know, but at least im not on my knees 
maybe i will burn forever but my love she tastes like peace
n when divinity comes for us i know they’ll burn with me

look on the lake by the sixth circle x2
blasphemous girl your blood’s in the water x2

(patient)
losing words so slowly that u cant tell
i say something but u don’t give a fuck
oh well

nothing heard from me slow crawling
towards ur heart before i fall
the chambers cold n white walled 
not jaded yet im so appalled

i get concerned when you say nothing
and i’m waiting for your calls
my heart is burning when we speak
but u don’t seem to care at all

i knew that this would happen
now i think of back then
cover me in gas and
throw the fucking match in

but i cant go yet
don’t know why but something keeps me here
part of me is wishing i spoke less of love and left unclear 
but i cant go yet
i don’t how u keep me here

      part of me is wishing

                        part of me is wishing

sixth circle w/ sprigtek (val & sprig)

@benjithemachine

[Lyrics]
Just another hopeless night
Hoping that I'll be alright
Talking till we see the light of morning
Baby I don’t wanna fight
I know that now is super tight
But it will all be fine when it’s morning
Baby I just wanna hide
Thinking thoughts of suicide
But I know that it will be fine in the morning
My actions in night are what make me terrified
I know what I said ain’t right, that’s why I’ll see u in the morning

Baby I’m calling mayday, everything’s gone sideways
180 on the Byway, my life flashing be for me
Do you still adore me? Or are you just horny?
Just want you to hold me, I’m feeling pretty lonely.

Just another hopeless night
Hoping that I'll be alright
Talking till we see the light of morning
Baby I don’t wanna fight
I know that now is super tight
But it will all be fine when it’s morning
Baby I just wanna hide
Thinking thoughts of suicide
But I know that it will be fine in the morning
My actions in night are what make me terrified
I know what I said ain’t right, that’s why I’ll see u in the morning

Morning [Prod. Benjithemachine]

Wrong turn (prod. recyclebin & garasu)

produced by me

-
wait for it
20 deep in the forest
gotta smoke a gram before recording
we gon leave if ur boring
true story
bought a gram for like 40
chill w bricks like a quarry
they gon scream my name they adore me

need a doctor
i been stuck in pain cant recover
feelings go away when i call her
please, i cant wait any longer

i dont act the same around people
cash american, bag illegal
i be chasing bread like a seagull
stuck in 2012 smoking diesel

can u teach me how cuz i cant get it down
hope its laced so i just feel my face on the ground
ud think that nobody would stay by now
move quiet, careful, don't make a sound

ill be gone
ill make sure u wont wait for long
huh, i'm ur dog
i hope u dont hate this song

i wudnt put it past me
look what u did are u happy
smoke gas down in cali
fuck fashion dress tacky

spent 50
taking lines till im dizzy
another pill could fix me
tell me i look pretty

i cant stay another day it'll break me
guess no one cares for my safety
if i tried to go, would you even chase me
take a pill, it's all i do lately

sour diesel

disc of sorrow

charlottes web (mental emphasis)

@5vexe

lyrics:

fall zurück auf die erde 
ich geb alles aber das war nie genug
hast mein herz in deiner hand war nie genug 
bin gefangen in deiner welt ist wie ein fluch 
es ist wie ein fluch 
ja ich geb alles aber das war nie genug 

ja ich greif nach den sternen 
hab noch so viel zu lernen 
fall zurück auf die erde 
weiß nicht was ich mal werde 

doch du lässt mich zurück 
nein ich hab kein glück 
doch du lässt mich zurück

ja ich greif nach den sternen 
werde niemals jemand werden 
hab noch so viel zu lernen 

ich geb alles aber das war nie genug
hast mein herz in deiner hand war nie genug 
bin gefangen in deiner welt ist wie ein fluch 
es ist wie ein fluch 
ja ich geb alles aber das war nie genug 

wa-was wenn du heut nach nicht gehst 
wa-was wenn du heut da stehst 
was wenn du heut bei mir schläfst 

denn wir greifen nach den sternen
kann noch so viel aus uns werden 
sind so fern von der erde 
sind so fern von der erde 


ich geb alles aber das war nie genug
hast mein herz in deiner hand war nie genug 
bin gefangen in deiner welt ist wie ein fluch 
es ist wie ein fluch 
ja ich geb alles aber das war nie genug 

ja ich geb alles aber das war nie genug 

ich geb alles aber das war nie genug
hast mein herz in deiner hand war nie genug 
bin gefangen in deiner welt ist wie ein fluch 
es ist wie ein fluch 
ja ich geb alles aber das war nie genug

sixth circle w/ sprigtek (val & sprig)

valentinesday