Too Much Information
©2021 Wakko

DISCLAIMER:
My 6-year-old was supposed to sing the second verse but decided to play Lego instead. I have not done either of those things. He did. Honest.

Ever done a fart that made your cat gag?
I have. I have.
Ever sat down hard on your ball-bag?
I have. I have.

Things you should keep to yourself

Ever got poo-poo on your iPad?
I have. I have.
Ever beaten up your Grandad?
I have. I have.

Things you should keep to yourself
Never tell anyone
Things you should keep to yourself

Too Much Information

EVERYTHING COMES CLEAR
WHEN YOU'RE HOLDING BACK THE FEAR
AND THEN YOU KICK IT BACK IN GEAR AGAIN

Found a pretty rough old demo of this song from 2009, fell in love with it all over again and decided it deserved a re-recording, Wakko style.
Another top notch bit of Mike Brooks song writing from my XPD days.

For my mate and serial bandmate Dan (1984-2022), who out of all the songs we played together, despised this one the least.

Play it loud.

Pulse

Your Mum Shops at Hyper
From the upcoming album "Taste This Poo"
©2023 Paul "Wakko" Jackson

Got something to announce to the schoolyard
Gonna burn you down in the schoolyard
I saw a wild infraction, something happened,
dodgy at the end of Derby Road

Perk up your ears hark the playground
Hostility become the playground
Your life is over, at it's end,
no one will want to be your friend anymore

You can try to deny but you're never gonna win
I've got the evidence, I saw her go in

Your Mum shops at Hyper
Their prices I can't decipher
Their cheese is much more riper
because it's out of date

You must be living on the breadline
"Because you're mine, I walk the breadline"
A can of warm Lipton ice tea for only
twelve and a half p, quite the deal

Though it kills me inside, I will confess to you
Their deals are scandalous, My Mum shops there too!

Your Mum shops at Hyper
My Mum shops at Hyper
Our Mums shop at Hyper
Do you wanna be my mate?

Your Mum Shops at Hyper

The new Beatles single inspired to me to pull Dan's vocals from a track he had written and recorded with his band "Anyhigh", some 15-20ish years ago, and give it a new lease of life. We did our own version of this song in our bands XPD and The Warm Guns, but never got round to recording a version with either. Some of the original lyrics I couldn't figure out (sorry!) so just made up my own for the parts Dan didn't sing.

This is my cover of an old Anyhigh track.
This is Dan Selvey's Fear.

When everything you cheer is everything you fear
It's you that tries so hard
You think you feel, you fear it's real

Some days my heart is a landfill
Crushed into gravel like roadkill
Should I break in to rainfall?
And get defensive 'cause I still...

When everything we try is everything that makes you cry
It's you that tries so hard
You think you feel, you fear it's real

It's more an art than a science
To simply suffer in silence
Should I break in to rainfall?
And get defensive 'cause I still...


Dan "Pastasauce" Selvey (1984-2022)

Taste This Poo

Dan Selvey's Fear (ft. Dan Selvey)

A song about tits. Specifically, ones that some old bloke we met in a pub may or may not have had in his lifetime.

Keith!
We see you moving through the city
Keith!
You bump in to the cool committee
Keith!
Sit in the corner of the Bell Inn
Keith!
Listen to stories that you're telling

How many boobies have you had in your lifetime?
How many boobies have you had?

Keith!
You're singing songs we've never heard before
Keith!
By people stone-cold dead since 1934
Keith!
You could not see through the piss-take
Keith!
When Tegra told you that his name was actually Craig

But how many boobies have you had in your lifetime?
I want to run and tell my Dad
(The tally of those mammary glands)
How many boobies have you had in your lifetime?
How many boobies have you had?
Keith!

Keef (ft. Grett)

HE'S ONLY GONE AND DONE IT AGAIN! Use this one to blow out your speakers and deafen yourselves.

BIGGER BOYS

Can you hear the rumbling
of a 50cc petrol chopper
on the patch of no-mans-land
outside the corner Happy Shopper

Who could make such rousing noise?
Can only be the local bigger boys

Can you see the hulking mess
armoured in his "Spliffy" jacket
scoffing a bag of Scampi Fries
He did not pay, just stole the packet

Another one nicked the steak McCoys
Can only be the local bigger boys

The bigger boys are coming, oh my God!
They're smoking cigarettes that smell oh so odd
The bigger boys are coming, run and hide!
Cower under woodchip 'neath the slide
I cried
Could today be the day that I die?

Can you smell the sweet perfume
of a six can pack of Shandy Bass
Not big enough for alcopops
but big enough to kick my ass

One dismantles, one destroys
Can only be the local bigger boys

(solo)

The bigger boys are coming, oh my lord
They're smashing windows 'cuz they're oh so bored
The bigger boys are coming, my oh my!
I wanna run home and play some Goldeneye
I cry
Could today be the day that I die?

Can you feel the smouldering
from the burnt-out yellow Renault Clio
Torched it with deodorant
they stole to cover up their B.O.

Who makes all the rousing noise?
Who nicks all the steak McCoys?
Who made me mess my corduroys?
Can only be the local bigger boys

Classic Hymns for Funerals

BIGGER BOYS

Had this song in my head for a couple of days, so decided to take a break from writing songs about poo and boobs and destroy a classic Beatles track.

Golden Slumbers (Lennon/McCartney)

Golden Slumbers (The Beatles)

The first in a series of acoustic covers we are doing for the hell of it. We probably won't ever play these live. Kicking things off with "He Was My Brother", written by the incredible Paul Simon and originally performed by Simon and Garfunkel.

We will take requests, if we think we can do it justice.

He Was My Brother (Simon & Garfunkel)

The Warm Guns are a rock band from the borders of Nottinghamshire and Derbyshire, in the UK.

We can get very loud.

He Was My Brother (Simon & Garfunkel)

The Warm Guns

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