The best of TMH

another song for that children's album that I am very slowly making.
chords, E7 - A7

lyrics:
the bugs are back! (the bugs are back baby!) x 3
yeah they're back, back
and they're on the attack!
the bugs are back! (the bugs are back baby!) x 3
yeah they're back, back
and they're on the attack!

it's springtime now all the bugs came to life
they crawled outta the earth
and into my night-MARES
I tell you i'm so SCARED
I know they're itty bitty and I know that I don't! care!
what's goin' on in a bug's brain?
why they actin' so strange?
can they even feel pain?
I don't know I only know

the bugs are back! (the bugs are back baby!) x 3
yeah they're back, back
and they're on the attack!
the bugs are back! (the bugs are back baby!) x 3
yeah they're back
and they want you for a snack!

mosquitoes! bitin' my leg!
beetles! makin' me sick!
centipedes! I neva seen one
but if I did
you know you KNOW I'd be screamin'!
ants! now they're not so scary...
but spiders! when their legs get hairy...
I swear if I saw a fairy
I'd think it was a bug and smush it like a berry!

the bugs are back x4
they're livin' in the trees
they're flyin' so free
get away from me
oh bug is a verb and it means you bother me

the war has begun
they outnumber us a million to one
an ant can lift a hundred thousand tons
25 of them and we'll be done

RUN!

the bugs are back x8

The Bugs Are Back!

the minute hour
music is I'll Follow Tomorrow / Phantom Thread II & III
by Jonny Greenwood, from the Phantom Thread OST

The Strangerman

This is your problem now, Kevin.
Season 3 - Trials

Music:
You're My Dream - Proud

Sweet Little Kevin

the life of the party.
Season 3 - Trials

Image by Nivekin. (full: https://imgur.com/CD7yGIb.jpg)

Music:
Blood Oath - Philip Glass (Kronos Quartet)
Warm Funk Groove Drumless Backing Track - Drumless Backing Tracks (Drum! Drum! Drum!)

Trials

My 30th Birthday

cruisin on my bike tryna pick up chicks
cruisin on my bike gonna see what sticks
cruisin on my bike and i feel alright
cruisin on my bike in the middle of the night
and im CRUISIN
CRUISIN ON MY BIKE
im CRUISIN
i’ll fuckin kill you if you dont look at my bike

cruisin on my bike and everyone’s watching
they wanna see a trick but i aint stoppin
cruisin on my bike til the end of my days
cruisin on my bike til they take it away

cruisin on my bike go head first into traffic
cruisin on my bike now im dead but im laughin
cause im CRUISIN

look at this motherfuckin bike
this bike

i cry for this bike
i die for this bike

Now i’m up in heaven, not a bike in sight
god comes up to me says “are you quite alright?”
i say god i need a bike, bikin’s my whole life
he says well now you aint living, so i guess thats life?
i say FUCK YOU god if i had my bike,
i’d tire up your face and 720 your spine
"hey! whoa what the fuck? chill out, bitch
your bike’s over there, i even had it fixed"
i walk right past him and spit on his robe
“THAT BIKE WASN’T BROKEN YOU MOTHER FUCKING DOPE”

i pick up my bike, it’s as light as a feather,
a thousand times faster and better than ever
i bike up a mountain in ten seconds flat
i bike into space, dont need a fucking map
but it doesnt feel right, this aint my fucking bike
its what someone thinks my bike might be like
i don’t care about speed i dont care about space
i just wanna fucking bike so get the FUCK OUT MY FACE

yeah im on a fuckin bike
and i need a fuckin bike
and if you ever wanna fight
just touch my motherfuckin bike

image by Nivekin

Drums:
Commusic

Cruisin On My Bike

Giant floating clock tower of doom coming to a city near you.
Season 3 - Trials

I live in a big clock tower,
it floats round from town to town,
with automat-ic 
turrets that
shoot you down
if you get too near.

And its got these rocket boosters,
that burn all the children dead -
yes I know,
that's fucked up,
the truth is 
I don't give a fuck.

Fuck everything that you think.
Fuck your lives and your lies they all stink.
I don't even understand the question,
and I don't
want to hear
you explain.

Oh I forgot something, that's right,
my Big Robot Grabbing Arms
they'll pick you
twist you round and
bring you to
the face of my clock.

Oh my god! I've been chosen!
The Clock God has picked another mate!

And I'll fire up my rocket boosters,
And I'll boost both our asses to space.

Music:
Sam Spence - Tune

I Live In A Big Clock Tower

You actually went and did it.
Season 3 - Trials
donate at theminutehour.com

You did it.
You didn't think that you could do it
but you did.

You
You did it
Yes you did it
You did!

You!
Are committed
cause you did it
didn't you?

On one hand
gotta hand it to you
cause others will say but you will do it
and we're gonna miss you so much
and we hope you don't regret it
because you already did it

you
gotta do
what you wanna do

You
you did it
yeah you finished livin,

it's true
there's no limit or decisions
ahead of you

now there's nothing left to do
nothing to say and nothing new and
maybe now you'll get acquainted with the nothing that's around you and the darkness that surrounds you

you'll
be with me
for all eternity!

Music:
Ending - Metal Gear

You Did It

The news has gotten NASTY!!
Season 3 - Trials
donate at theminutehour.com
become a patron: patreon.com/theminutehour

those two little fuckers
those two little fucking fuckers
my life is ruined
they fuck up what I'm doin

fuck all the kids we
must fuck all the kids I tell ya
I cannot stand them
I don't give a single goddamn

those little fuckers
their days are numbered
I would kill them myself
if I thought I could get away with it

fuck fuck the kids and
fuck them for good cause
we don't need them
we're leaving
leaving them behind with nothing

fuck kids
fuck kids
nothing matters
all this time we just wanted to say --
fuck em.

Fuck The Kids

There's a new sheriff in town.
Season 3 - Trials
donate at theminutehour.com
become a patron: patreon.com/theminutehour

Music:
Danger - Sam Spence

New Sheriff

What a beautiful thing.
Season 4 - Relay

become a patron: patreon.com/theminutehour
donate at theminutehour.com
logo by Arthur Hickman

Music:
Welcome Back / Perturbator's Theme - Perturbator

Relay

That's A Nice Grill

say his name everyday
Season 4 - Relay
support @ patreon.com/theminutehour

Music:
Flight to Freedom - Sam Spence

Vote BimStar!

I got me a plaaaaaan
Season 4 - Relay
theminutehour.com
become a patron: patreon.com/theminutehour

Music:
Sam Spence - It's Over There

Lyrics:
do you think i'm happy when i lay in bed at night
do you think i'm happy with the way i live my life
everything i said to you turns out it wasnt true
every night in bed is when i pay for what i do

go ahead tell everybody
all the things you hate about me
i dont care what they think
not with where im goin

soon yes very soon i'll travel far away from here
to a place where all my problems up and disappear

go ahead tell everybody
theres nothing you cant say honey
i dont care what they think
not with where im goin

soon yes very soon im gonna buy myself a gun
press it to my temple test the trigger just for fun
when you hear a boom a splat all followed by a crunch
then youll know how bad i feel for the things ive done

do you think im happy when i lay in bed at night
do you think im happy with the way i live my life
soon you'll get a front row seat to my bloody demise
would that make you happy would it make you feel alive
would it make you happy if i killed myself tonight
Hey!

Do You Think I'm Happy

the many mini mysterious misadventures of jack bb
the minute hour.

music:
Jerry & Phil - Jerry Cotton soundtrack
French Girl in Manhattan (w/ Marie France) - Jerry Cotton soundtrack
Cristallo Cristallo - Jerry Cotton soundtrack

Mini Mysteries! with Detective Jack BB

the minute hour.

music:
Goodbye, Jerry - Peter Thomas Sound Orchestra
Halzar - IT

The Hero of the Diner

what does a fuckin' bitch have to do around here to get firebombed??

the minute hour

What This Fuckin' Bitch Doesn't Understand

can't get in my head!
the minute hour.

music:
Peter Thomas Sound Orchestra - Eternal Song
Peter Thomas Sound Orchestra - Dream
Peter Thomas Sound Orchestra - Kopenhagen
Peter Thomas Sound Orchestra - Cielanzo

My Prize Terrarium

tmh now available on spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/08bd6htRyX5zNsoGKzmOhk

music by Kevin Macleod
"Western Streets"
"Leaving Home"
"Witch Hunt"

the rest are sounds from rollercoaster tycoon

The RCT Killer

the minute hour

lyrics:
big yellow schoolbus
all the kiddies get on
that freakin thing's taking them to school, as they do

I cant help but thinkin
theres no way there's not a single stinkin kid
on that bus ain't got the flu
which means

soon, I'll be livin in coronaville
yes I will be livin in a coronaville
and I'm not thrilled,
but there's nothin I can do
there's nothin I can say to you
I need my mail forwarded to
corona HQ

I'm gonna get it

there's somethin I should mention
somethin not far from my thoughts
I think about it a lot
as a man of 27
coronavirus is not
gonna make me drop

the rate of mortality only really goes up when you're 70 or older
and that's already pretty old
now everyone's warnin me
they're tellin me I should quarantine
maybe I will, maybe I won't

yo gonna geddit

Coronaville (Yogonnageddit)

This song may cause frank and uncomfortable discussions with your friends and family members.

B - A - E (chords)

lyrics:
this song sounds terrible to pedophiles
only pedophiles
this song sounds terrible to pedophiles
only pedophiles
yes this song will sound terrible to you
if you identify, as a pedophile
and if you say "hey that's not my style,
I just don't like this song"
that's a pedophile in denial!

this song sounds terrible to pedophiles,
only pedophiles
this song sounds terrible to pedophiles
only pedophiles
if you dream of catchin a plane to 
pedophile island
then you won't like it
that's a 100% guarantee from me
I did the research, I got a bibliography

I took a survey
of my closest friends
and the ones who don't like this song
they like fuckin' kids
they fuck kids
they fuck kids
I stopped being their friend
cause of what they did!

I took a head count
of all my work buddies
and the ones who told me my
SINGIN WAS SHITTAYY, THEYY
fuck kids
they fuck kids
I have evidence
I release it, when it's appropriate

this song sounds terrible to pedophiles
only pedophiles
this song sounds terrible to pedophiles
only pedophiles
if you dream of catchin' a plane to 
pedophile island, then you won't like it
and if you say "hey, it's not my style,
I just don't like your song"
WRONG!

you're a pedophile
I think you're a dirty pedophile
if you don't like song, it's cause wanna bone a child
and for you that may be cool but for me it's not

if you can't groove to this, it's cause you're groomin' kids
if you can't groove to this, it's cause you're groomin'
you're groomin a kid! (oo!)
(that's not cool)
(that's not cool)

This Song Sounds Terrible

another tune for this damn pandemic - originally premiered on CronaCast 2.
vocals/lyrics by TMH, music by Spaghetti Squash. We've got a few songs in the works, we'll release them all as an album at some point.

lyrics
2 pm at the grocery store
I'm in the aisle lookin' at some corn
I turn to my right
and what do I spy?
but a beautiful half of a face
I'm stuck here standing in place
imaginin' the beautiful bottom half of your face
with those eyebrows so plucked and refined now 
and guess what?
I love the size of the gap between your eyes
it's not too wide
and I imagine that the bottom half of your face is probably fine

whoa, I hope
you're givin me so much hope
whoa, whoa

The best of TMH

t0x1c M3M3l0rD