realise that the blocks don't stop
want u to keep jumping and thinking
at this very moment i push it all away
need things to go in my head
these hills are silent
it's so easy to stay inside
like the few square feet around me
are the essence of this life of mine

why even talk about happy things
when it always just loops back to black
why bother with friendships
when it all just ends and we're all gonna go mad
of loneliness
i see all around me noones without it
these screens do help
dive in and now we're knowing and righteous

but i know this is all just me
im awful
i wish upon others what i have
misfortune

u keep saying its not my fault but ik ive done something im sorry its happened like this

sing this once and never again

just gave our orders, and resumed our silence
reverted to my default of hiding behind my shyness
tried to catch her eye but it was no use
felt like the last straw and i think we both knew

turns out it was about the new person i am
different gleam in my eyes, ever since i moved back
that i seem more indifferent to life's simple pleasures
even though i know what works for me, now i couldn't be safer?

oh no oh no
world is shifting in my eyes
oh no oh no
see shit in a different light
oh no oh no
i had so much more to say
oh well oh well
it's her word i have to take

we were sitting in a restaurant and she (different she)just ignored me all day and i was torn idk if it was overdramatic or if i genuinely did something like wtf is going on

perplexing discussion about my worldviews, morals and values

masteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadowsmasteroftheshadows

masteroftheshadows

(prod uguwap x yqinnny)
(janes)
I'll slam my feet through the concrete
These voices alarm me
I try my best, I swear my soul is dissolving
Better luck again
Thought we were more than friends
I guess that this was alll just pretend
x2

(union)
Backed out for a second, now I can't breathe
I swear I lose my mind when you're not next to me
You make it hard to cope when you're
Ten thousand miles away from home
I cannot sleep, man, I just cannot think
That there was someone else better than me
My eyes are blurry, I can barely see
I'll say it now this is how I feel
I don't feel at home
I hate being alone
(Oh-ooh)

(cigs)
I don’t wanna be alone
 I wanna feel at home (at home) well maybe I’m alone in my life
 I wanna make it right but she told better luck next 
time oh whoa whoa oh

Better Luck Again w/ union + cigs

timewespent / hearthebirdsing

sample is gummy by jane remover

goodbye my dear friend

goodbye

with some new friends thank you @riensu @1toge
follow them:
www.instagram.com/ri3nsu/
www.instagram.com/notmanni/
all plats march 31st: https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/andrelv/want-your-attention-feat-manni---riensu

prod me once again

lyrics:
always feeling nervous yeah i never can relax
you know there's always trepidation just a feeling in my chest
and im running from my problems cos i never know whats next
really hope its not too late
i need a second to react

chorus:
i dont have any more reasons just to see you around
i just wanna hear the words that you wanna tell me
i lost my mind but u found it
why am i always so selfish
i dont need your attention
but i want it
every thought that i have always circles back to you
im so scared of you so i can never tell the truth
my heart is beating so fast i don't know what to do
im falling again and its so hard to find you

manni ✰ @1toge:
its so hard to let go
when i really wanted more now
but you wanna slow down
is this all a game to you
cause i dont really have a clue
fuck do you want me to do
did you want me to relapse
i just want my keys back
did you really mean that
theres no point if you dont feel love
so i wonder if i cross your mind
cause i dont really want to be left behind

riensu @riensu:
i've been waiting for you to come save me
cause after all we've been through you're still my safety
would you catch me again and again
dont want to pretend
but i'll be fine without you

r: she got me running back
m: she got me wanting more
r: tell me what its all for
m: tell me and ill love you more
r: lets get right to the chase
m: run around my mind like a maze
r: no text back like im not phased, at all

(chorus again)

my verse:
im way too tired to converse
guess i'll see you again
i try my best but it never works
cos you fuck up my plans
i swear im stuck in a curse
i'll never understand
im falling again
and its so hard to find you
if i had another chance i swear i'll never lose
you grazed right pass me
didnt even know its you
they told me everything is fine i really hope its true
you know its never easy but im weathering with you

want your attention w/ manni ✰ & riensu

honesty demo

produced by ivy cloak

mixed by me

written by osoarin @osoarin

i can see everything happening at once (ivy cloak)

prod squirlbeats & kinsage second half prod me
goin thru a lot but everyone still my bruh

bruh (emotional) (squirlbeats & kinsage & joebruh)

song by [@conren]
produced by [@conren]
click SHOW MORE for lyrics

------------------------------------------------------------

you always laughed at me when i was at my worst
i should've told you but i was all out of words
i sit in silence and remember all this hurt
yeah and it hurts me
and if you think that i didn't care at all 
its cause i'm thinking i might just go end it after all 
shoot out all my brains all on the ceiling, paint the wall
listen to my screams of help cause i wont be here long
I'm gon' shoot my brains out
Let my body rot, just let it fall down
Leave behind the things I used to care about
Cause I don't really have nobody helping out
I'm selfish now

perplexing discussion about my worldviews, morals and values

diary