Recoil!

from this past semester
dont rly feel attached to this anymore but its too good to scrap
prod. @deadyami <3
hope u enjoy

lyrics:
part of the problem’s always guessing where you went
i’m always back to that evening
i’ve tried to focus on the present since you left 
you know damn well it aint easy

so try as i may
im falling to pieces
when you’re not here

another step in the wrong direction
im losing grip on whats real 
if we’d just focus on communication
then i probably wouldn’t be here

so try as i may
im falling to pieces
when you’re not here
the sky’s far too grey
for me to get
over you this year

another case of what if
i know its face value but
theres still something there 
got my attention with a
post, not a mention and i
wish i didn’t care, i
will never get away
i’ll always be the same
i’m trapped in my room
i’m thinking of you again
i’ll never get away
i’ll always be the same
i’m trapped in my room
i’m thinking of you again

i’ll never get away
i’ll always be the same

so try as i may
im falling to pieces
when you’re not here
the sky’s far too grey
for me to get
over you this year
i’ll never get away
i’ll always be the same
i’m trapped in my room
i’m thinking of you again

telegraph, a motion picture [dead yami]

Written by Owen Jacobsen
Mix and Mastered by Owen Jacobsen 
Produced by Owxn

lyrics: 

Because you don’t even matter to me
There’s a part that you don’t see 
Behind the withering of everything in my life
Now I’m so tired and sick of situations I’m in
And I’m needing space 
Cause I’ve been losing patience 
Over things you say and I don’t know if I can take it
Thinking that I’m needing a break

Because things don’t work out as you want them to
And I learned that from myself no no not from you
You thought that you could help but you just intrude 
On things in my life that I don’t want you to
Know about but it’s not that it’s a secret 
But if it was, I know that you couldn’t keep it
And I don’t got a problem with trust
But you just don’t stop speaking 
Don’t stop speaking (oh oh oh)

Because you don’t even matter to me
There’s a part that you don’t see 
Behind the withering of everything in my life
Now I’m so tired and sick of situations I’m in
And I’m needing space 
Cause I’ve been losing patience 
Over things you say and I don’t know if I can take it
Thinking that I’m needing a break

Because you don’t even matter to me
There’s a part that you don’t see 
Behind the withering 
Of everything in my life
Now I’m so

Don’t Even Matter

@kennedysucks
prod. fakegod
-
Ice so cold it could heal my wrists
With a blade so big it could cut my lips
Got a van with an AK
If you wanna live better vacate
Heyday
Mayday
Aahh
You wanna talk
You better walk
Spoke with your bitch, and she sucked on my cock
Been through a lot
Still fuck the cops
Rotting away but I'm never gon' stop
How could I stop
Everyone drops dead
Why would I waste it in my bed
Voices residing in my head (head)
One more click and then I'm dead

My time
Has come for high tides
My life
Rots away as I die

I hate the blood, I need some gas
He said I think that I can help
He said how much you wanna cop
I said as much as you can sell
I got a Glock with 30 rounds
and if I take it out my belt
I'll marry 29, out to save the last one for myself
I'm not a killer, but don't push me
I'll try anything once
I'll have your momma wonder why you ain't been calling as much
And you'll be six feet underground, and she gon' look for her son
I give it four to five months before she's digging you up
You a bitch, I never feared another man on this earth
I got an AR
I'm about to show yo ass how it work
'Cuz talking shit will leave yo ass stuck with a mouth full of dirt
Buried alive, bitch, cuz I wanna make sure that it hurts (Kennedy!)

Ice so cold it could heal my wrists
With a band so big it could cut my lips
Got a van with an AK
If you wanna live better vacate
Heyday
Mayday
Aahh
You wanna talk
You better walk
Spoke with your bitch, and she sucked on my cock
Been through a lot
Still fuck the cops
Rotting away but I'm never gon' stop
How could I stop
Everyone drops dead
Why would I waste it in my bed
Voices residing in my head (head)
One more click and then I'm dead

My time
Has come for high tides
My life
Rots away as I die

SPOTIFY

BURIED ALIVE (w/ kennedyxoxo)

a lil different from normal, hope you still like it. 

Lyrics:
it hurts falling away
wishing for better days with you

mirror on my wall 
tell me its all my fault

getting you hurt
by my insecurities

in my head falling to 
pieces dead
knowing you know
he takes better care of you
better care of *you*

-----------------------------------------

flower petals ✾

Produced by Carlby
Guitar by @irby134
Vocals mixed by @decksmusic
Mastered by Michael Venia @veniamastering

LYRICS
It’s hard for me to make peace with this
Can’t shake this sense of abandonment
You left me feeling misplaced
Like I don’t really fit in
You were a friend to me back then
But now we’re broken irrevocably
It can’t be mended
Who knows what went on in your head
The path you chose was selfish

But I stuck out my neck anyway
And I believed you every time you swore to me that you’d change
The path you chose could only lead one way
Towards your self destruction and an early grave

But what about all those you left behind
At only twenty-five
That’s too young to die
To put your vice above your life
That’s suicide

Listen on Spotify!

Misplaced (Prod. w/ irby)

Mixed/Mastered By Me 
-
Produced By https://soundcloud.com/jolst & https://soundcloud.com/pekarot_161
-
Lyrics

don't tell me how to be i don't wanna see
we fight, then more we talk  2 o'clock and i can't fucking sleep 
lining up that coke every night ya i won't fucking breathe 
saw u with some guy but that's a price to pay so 
i don't wanna move on way too fast no 
tell me u don't care 
just know i'm not surprised 
and i'm not sleeping tonight

hold me close to my head 
ima go mia u won't notice
ima leave u out every night 
leave u cause it's time
notice in my eyes i'll despise u till i die
u don't need me nah nah that's okay
cause ima vanish she want stay but i don't care hoe 
nah and don't u ever tell me how to be 

don't tell me how to be i don't wanna see
we fight, then more we talk  2 o'clock and i can't fucking sleep 
lining up that coke every night ya i won't fucking breathe 
saw u with some guy but that's a price to pay so 
i don't wanna move on way too fast no 
tell me u don't care 
just know i'm not surprised 
and i'm not sleeping tonight

we fight, then more we talk (jolst x pekarot)

Lyrics:

Stuck on a path I wish I wasn't
Life's such a blur but it doesn't
Lead me in the right direction
That's what I get for getting no affection

I can't seem to see straight lines
Impulsive thoughts through my mind
Lead me in the right direction
Heart beat racing, resurrection

You weren't there for me and it's obvious why
I needed comfort and you weren't by my side
I let you sink all your teeth in my innocent skin
Impressions deeply engraved solely within my mind

Sink these teeth into your mind
marks will fade just give it time
Things will fade, storms brew together
Rolling low fly stormy weather

No matter where you run, no matter where youll hide
Youll run back in due time
You may not think so now, but you'll always be mine

Can I, ever, really let go?
Will I, ever, find myself solo?

Stuck on a path I wish I wasn't
Life's such a blur but it doesn't
Lead me in the right direction
That's what i get for getting no affection

You weren't there for me and it's obvious why
I needed comfort and you weren't by my side
I let you sink all your teeth in my innocent skin
Impressions deeply engraved solely within my mind

And you're not gonna be there
For my last breath dear
used to make me feel helpless
But I don't feel the same fear
And you're not gonna be there
For my last breath dear
used to make me feel helpless
But I don't feel the same fear

TEETH ft. Blospar (p.maniksprod)

produced by mix
sorry for the wait, i kinda rushed this song
enjoy <3

lyrics~

i get chased in the end
i lost friends so ill defend
i fight here while you pretend
ill die here could you lend a hand

i wont ask for help
ill just stay this way
hope it ends this way
oh i pray to stay
i try to stop them

make me wipe your memory, from everything you saw
you didn't see coming, uppercut right to your jaw
i ain't no bitch ye, i put that shit on my ma
now i see your strugglin, i guess thats your only flaw

now stop and start again, you can reach me in the end
now fall and fall again, you make me sick all through my skin
im strugglin to fight, but i know that i must win
i need to make it outta here, and let my new life begin

i wish i could say, i wish you would know
i wish i could stay, i wish you would go
throw another punch, then you slit my throat
i will die here, thats the final blow

i gotta go now man i need run
you gotta stay close hide me from the sun
im bleedin out now man this was no fun
im gonna die soon but i know ive won

you better run

picking up the ashes. i see myself in the glass
how am i alive? i should be dead in the grass
oh im still here, oh please don't fear
my arms around you, we lie there in the field.

thank you <3

the field

prod the goat @unaake

hope it aint obvious cuz its unbearable
i wear it on my fucking sleeve im fucking terrible
im breathing deep cuz i can feel u run the variables
i got a month before u leave this time's invaluable

im sick of holding back thoughts
everyone i know is sick its hard to care if im not
i keep hoping itll stick, bear the waters ill cross
what if its not worth the risk? heaven knows if im lost

this is who i am i'll fight the fire
(this is who i am, fight the fire)
wonder where all my desire's gone
(this is who i am, a fuckin liar ugh)
i try to stay inspired
(this is who i am, fight the fire)
maybe thats why i cant love for long
(this is who i am, a fuckin liar, oh)

who i am [bugboi]

The album "Ashes Bloom: Dark vs Light" is a double story told through sound.
The first half — Darkness — carries the weight of broken hearts, shadows, and fading echoes.
The second half — Light — reflects the same emotions in a brighter, more intimate way, like flowers rising from ashes.

Each track exists in duality: one dramatic, one alive. Together, they create a journey through loss, transformation, and rebirth — a mirror of a soul rediscovering itself.

This is not just music. It’s a confession, a haunting dream, and a gentle resurrection.

the field

mix≬