Spent 19yrs Underneath The Surface Of The Ocean N Now Im Growing Coral (tiedforsilver)

it's hard

lyrics:
i scribbled symphonies of peace to cope with finding out the truth
worked as needed reaching what middle school me would think was cool
fiddling pens and pencils pensive wasn’t picky with the tool
i’d use for some naive translation of my angst and fragile mood

i can’t afford it now

growing pains replaced with what the bills are like in winter now
since the cold ascended i can’t shake the taste of poetry
phonetically imperfect pretty speech protruding out of me
im cramming syllables to cry of colder temps and picture books
reliving twisted memories romanticizing what it took
to be alive surviving prerip jeans and social trends
extending my insistence on reliving those remember when’s

it’s a fucked up toxic endeavor

middle child needs attention to feel valid who’da guessed it?
choose an evening to feel hollow with my grief i’ve been selective
been a lot of things over the years but never been objective
i’m a passive dude

some would call it sitting fence and when i’m honest i probably would too
at my expense i picked the easiest escape when i could
now im desperate to do something i should

cause there’s something bout finality that scares me
wavered care perpetuated the impression that i’m distant and aware
of ticking hours minutes seconds sticking strictly to my regiment
rejected any message i was yet to learn my lesson
started strong and i accepted that’s enough to use the leverage
and projected progress farther now it’s a little more than hard
to understand i’m on a limit always finish weaker than i started
know how to begin but stutter further in the tempo how ironic

looking in the mirror a song by melmige thank you for listening [prod. eeryskies]

i was sad now i’m up i was paid right
started messing w the right ones now i’m alright
got to paving my own way 
went from darkness to the light
went from staying up late
to sleeping at night 

had my heart strings to having them break
fuck that
is it too late?
i think i need a break
so i got one today
i’m on my way
got my money up
so i say what i say 
had people hate on me for anything
for being me but i still sing
i stopped caring bout what u think
i’m doing me fuck what you think 

i’m better than your average chart singer
got bored of holding in the truth so i had to switch up
the whole scene is gonna take over
we out casts to the normies
but that makes us better than you all
we gotta stand tall
making hits in my bedroom
while your in the studio
do this by myself making my own beats
using some producers 
showing love to the scene

alrightalright (bended)

guitar by me

monsters
inside my walls
they like break me
down
until i crawl
save me
i think i lost
the war between
myself and i
leave me here to rot
i’ll take u back any day
with no second thought 
do u ever feel the same
would u kill for just a day
for us
to meet
once again

walls

prod. kill breanna x caves x safeatlast

dont try me
im not me 
i dont eat 
i dont sleep
oh
and im still 
looking at the sky
wondering why
and wasting my time
the ninja dude never hit the lightpoles
i always find out where you go
youre enough, i promise baby
no one else could ever save me
i take every step too, and it fucking pains me
and im focused on you, all the time maybe...
i did it all for you and no i dont regret it
i prance over the flowers and it kills them! . .
im sorry that i dont stand up for me, but,
im really not the same as i ever was,
now ill always say what i (truly) want
who are you, and who am i?
dont try me
im not me 
i dont eat 
i dont sleep
oh
and im still 
looking at the sky
wondering why
and wasting my time
the ninja dude never hit the lightpoles
i always find out where you go
youre enough, i promise baby
no one else could ever save me
i take every step too, and it fucking pains me
and im focused on you, all the time maybe...
i did it all for you and no i dont re.. gret.. it
i prance over the flowers and it kills them..
i prance over the flowers and it kills them.. :')
i wish i wasnt him, and such a victim
(i know im not!!)
(i know im not!!!!)
who are you and who am i?
who are you and who am i?
who are you and who am i?
who are you and who am i?
who are you and who am i!!!
who are you and who am i?
who are you and who am i?
who are you and who am i?
who are you and who am i-

every step too

@xobroken @jolst


and i can tell when you're lying
you can see it in your eyes
you can see it in your smile
fucking hate when you're vile

its like you get a fucking knife
and you stab me in the vital

ur only nice on your birthday
get your cards and open them up
the writing on the inside are lies open it up

and i dont wanna feed your ego
if i could get out of here
id be heathrow

guess i pay the price now
fuck it its a time out
i just turn the light out
tell me whats important
6 in the morning
i left in the morning
i just want a foreign

"take a seat"
i dont wanna sit down
ive been all up on my mind
n idk where im going

dont act like you know
dont act like you know whats going on
cause you fkn dont

It’s a cycle
She hit my vitals
No survival 
Expect apologies when I’m dying, ya so entitled
Feelin like I lost myself since your arrival
Saw this Shit coming but I was in denial

I been deceased 
She not missing me
Turned into fiend
Full of grief
Xanax make me lean
Weak up in the knees
Puffin trees
Just to get some sleep
Unable to dream
White tee
Blood drippin on me

Didn’t see you leaving, what should I expect? Im so dead,  there’s no way to resurrect me
Said you loved me 
Then you left
What’s is that?
Everything’s a mess

smile w/ xobroken (jolst x radkoun)

cedar street w/ evergarden

from my soul
featuring: @greenwood2000
produced by: @trplgmni
art by: @tamagotchu

lyrics:
can you blame me for the reply?
couple months had to get by
now instead of waiting outside
i found a way to live a new life
another lens, check the replay
look at all the shit thats been changed
always tough in the deep grey
but i made it out unscathed
if i don’t even remember
its because i’m doing better
wooden necklace & a keen eye
gotta feeling that i’m

blinded by the downpour outside your house
i’m getting out more, saving for a shred of my doubt
i’ll stick around, tour the places that you care about
i find it funny we’re broken, with just how well that we’re spoken
it took time for me
to get a grasp on what’s real
could you tether to me?
i think i can finally see
a wound so tender it healed
now you can tether to me, baby

greenwood: 
killing time before the door
more than life, more than you know
thought it's different, i was told

lost touch the way it is
further from the places that we've been
despite the mess i'm in
over and over
the state i'm waking in
the bed's been feeling colder
i'm ashamed to say it doesn't fit anyone without you
never did

i'd wait for you in Spring
i'm changing in the worst way
i'm holding out again this time

(gotta feeling that i’m blinded by the)
downpour outside your house
i’m getting out more, saving for a shred of my doubt
i’ll stick around, tour the places that you care about
i find it funny we’re broken, with just how well that we’re spoken
it took time for me
to get a grasp on what’s real
could you tether to me?
i think i can finally see
a wound so tender it healed
now you can tether to me, baby

tether (ft. greenwood) [triple gemini]

spotify & apple <3

lyrics ⬇️

it’s been cold out
and I been here alone
yea
i been here alone
and you don’t check ur phone now

i just hear the tone but I don’t wanna hear it no

you got me by the throat
knowing what I’ve done with you its so hard to go
i know it’ll show when I walk up in the room
implode and choke
cuz you cant stand the view 
I know I know

I’ve often been the rude one in ur life
but I’m offering solutions to make it right

your life is full of gratitude is that a lie
only if they knew a thing or two of what we do at night

it’s not so nice it’s not a crime but I know that I shouldn’t do it y
they say I should go to therapy but I already do it
i know what it’s like to bury everything cuz I been thru it
multiple the opportunities I lose I can’t control it
honestly I think it’s pride that’s over doing my influence 
everyday I’m getting by but how idk i have been clueless

let me close my eyes then I’ll prove it
my whole life a lie 
make me feel stupid




I know theyll be laughing in the background
came close but never really got attached how
i really meant to and i wish that i got it right
maybe this the problem why i cant sleep at night

I know, I know. w/ NAVYXOWER (yunny x cxrter)

long nights of the figting and its been getting old 
so you packed up boxes and you said hit the road
jack all in my system you try to play yhe victim 
but
the writings on the ceiling,
the walls were just depleting 

i try to be my best and im doing all i can 
but im falling the thru the floor 
and im sinking where i stand 
its hard to cope with less and i hope you understand that im nothing more than flesh if i couodnt be your man

winter cold tells me something thay i dont know
wind chill on my heart sub zero word to homie nick i tried but not a hero 
tried to make a list but i left it up in reno
i don’t know whats gotten into you but i cant help but wonder why you lost our love 
i know im not enough x2

yeah i know its hard x2


long nights of the figting and its been getting old 
so you packed up boxes and you said hit the road
jack all in my system you try to play the victim 
but
the writings on the ceiling,
the walls were just depleting 

i try to be my best and im doing all i can 
but im falling the thru the floor 
and im sinking where i stand 
its hard to cope with less and i hope you understand that im nothing more than flesh if i couodnt be your man

guess i couldn’t be your man
3 years gone now i dont know who i am
but i know its hard
but i know its hard

flesh [sorrow bringer]

this is probably my favorite song I've ever made, and it means a lot to me.

if you've made it here, please like & repost as it helps other people who might relate to my music find it

ty to all who listen <3
prod. michael harrison

**lyrics**
I miss when
We would talk
And we'd sit on that curb till it
Got too dark
For us
My hand in yours, I still feel numb
Why'd you say those words to me?
When everything was better off unsaid

I cant take this breath
If it means i could still be alive

I dont really wanna die I just want a warm embrace
Looking at ya' from the sky but i cant see your face
Babe It's just another ride, you know Ima be okay
But man i hope they hear my cry when i finally break
(x2)

If I turned around, would you call your friend?
I hate who I was but I'm better again
I cant stand the silence, you're my medicine
It's starting to rain, would you just take my hand
(x2)

I miss when
We would talk
And we'd sit on that curb till it
Got too dark
For us
My hand in yours, I still feel numb
Why'd you say those words to me?
When everything was better off unsaid

I cant take this breath
If it means i could still be alive

limerence (michael harrison)

literal vampire.

@4EVER-Collective / the Hallway / FTB / @everlasting-collective

business inquiries: avxidmgmt@gmail.com

enj0y

Spent 19yrs Underneath The Surface Of The Ocean N Now Im Growing Coral (tiedforsilver)

AVXiD

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