what i feel for you is ethereal

remember your place

vocals by: hostile & @creepiess
mixed by: hostile
produced by: candy

@beenhostile
I can't bring myself to say I love you
Cuz I don't know how to love myself
Girl, how am I supposed to trust you
If I've been hurt by everyone else
This pain is rooted deep and deeper
If you relate, it's nice to meet ya
No, you don't see your every feature
Stare at me like some worldly creature

Oh, I can't get their eyes off me
Yeah, I tried to comfort and do as she pleased
Oh, I can't get their eyes off me
Give me an audience, watch me bleed

@creepiess
I'm such a lovely monster in your closet
Baby, why are you asking me to stop it?
Bringing up that sh*t, just drop it
Heart snatching thief, made me run my pockets
You know that I know that you're wasting my time
Delusions, I'm in the clouds, still think our love is sublime
Just started walking together, how'd we run out of time?
So now I gaslight myself I wont admit you're not mine

So I learn to live with myself baby
All these eyes glued to me daily
So I just can't call you baby
Cuz I

@beenhostile
I can't bring myself to say I love you
Cuz I don't know how to love myself
Girl, how am I supposed to trust you
If I've been hurt by everyone else
This pain is rooted deep and deeper
If you relate, it's nice to meet ya
No, you don't see your every feature
Stare at me like some worldly creature

Oh, I can't get their eyes off me
Yeah, I tried to comfort and do as she pleased
Oh, I can't get their eyes off me
Give me an audience, watch me bleed

go stream!

creature

vocals by: hostile & @creepiess
mixed by: hostile & @creepiess
produced by: @1sickboi

@beenhostile
October 31st
Go door to door till lights out
Some say this night is cursed
Or that it's  lost its touch now
But pumpkin carving, apple bobbing, fall festivities
All these things I look forward to, on this Hallow's Eve

Sugar rush, we'd look for candy, get our buckets full
The jack-o-lanterns smiling at us, with burning candles

Scary movies tonight
Haunted houses call our name
Hope our costumes gives you a fright
Still wish Halloween felt the same

October 31st
Go door to door till lights out
Some say this night is cursed
Or that it's  lost its touch now
But pumpkin carving, apple bobbing, fall festivities
All these things I look forward to, on this Hallow's Eve

@creepiess
Finally get to dress up how I've always wanted to be
And I'm gon' kill my teeth by eating copious amounts of candy
The pumpkin spice smell fills the hair
Fake blood all up in my air
No judgement, nobody cares
That your skin is green

Are you ready for Halloween?
It's so exciting, you'll see what I mean
The monsters come out when the sun goes down
Down

@beenhostile
October 31st
Go door to door till lights out
Some say this night is cursed
Or that it's  lost its touch now
But pumpkin carving, apple bobbing, fall festivities
All these things I look forward to, on this Hallow's Eve

(buddha's realm)

31st

inspired by: https://soundcloud.com/liamaparsons/hard-to-love?si=94bb3eeda63646c9954ca3292fd0171a&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

vocals by: hostile
mixed by: hostile
guitar by: @liamaparsons

(I'm just a boybug)
(shoutout Liam)

(oh, I know it's futile)

see, I know it's futile
inevitable, one of us goes
do you notice my fake smile?
you've been hurtful
my heart's still broke
you put me through countless trials
can't react
I need to man up
berate and have me defiled
can you please be gentle?
I'm your boybug

(your boybug) x2

my shell and dreams are shattered
you're bludgeoning my hopes and heart
both my wings are tattered
the stitches in them came apart
did any of this matter?
I'm only getting sadder
did any of this matter?

I guess not

I'm your boybug
I want back my lady
it's more than a crush
she blatantly saved me
I'm your boybug
I need back my lady
it's more than a crush
it's driving me crazy

another comes along to promise loving
you said that I have your word
but I'm not trusting
I'm just your plaything, you have fun with
and then you toss me like I'm worth nothing
wish I could tell if you were worth cuffing
I had to get to know you, no assumptions
I turned a blind eye to your presumptions
why did I fail to see you weren't bluffing

(pin the blame on me)
(it's my fault)
(losing sanity)
(it's almost gone)

(did any of this matter?)
(I guess not)

I'm your boybug
I want back my lady
it's more than a crush
she blatantly saved me
I'm your boybug
I need back my lady
it's more than a crush
it's driving me crazy

(moth)

boybug

i know

[Intro]
I got time to lose on you
But I don’t wanna feel this pain
What more can I do
But I’m just tryna be okay
A single butterfly that made me fall far away
I’m trapped inside my room
I don’t know where to escape
And your gonna sing me lullaby’s that say
All my name
And say that I’m insane

[Chorus]
I don’t wanna break up
Feels likes it’s a shitty way to say that you won’t
Make up
Tell me what you want but I just know you gon
Change up
Why can’t you just say the things I say for you
It’s hurtful
I try my best for you
Why can’t you see it through
Baby don’t you feel the same
Right now I’ve caused you pain

[Verse]
Walk out in shame, close the door
It’s a shame that we have love now you don’t anymore
And you got my heart beating
Falling to the floor
And I feel like I’m defeated do you just want more
Oh god, you ain never got to see the rain it pours
You ain never got to see the ugliness
Just tell me what you want
And I’ll be there for you
Cause you know my love has been always
See upcoming pop shows
Get tickets for your favorite artists

[Chorus]
I don’t wanna break up
Feels likes it’s a shitty way to say that you won’t
Make up
Tell me what you want but I just know you gon
Change up
Why can’t you just say the things I say for you
It’s hurtful
I try my best for you
Why can’t you see it through
Baby don’t you feel the same
Right now I’ve caused you pain

makeup

[Chorus]
I’m a wreck a whore a self abuser
You don’t wanna love me lose her
Bite my neck and grap the ruger 
I don’t wanna end this sooner 
Why do you just runaway 
When I don’t wanna play your games 
It’s driving me so fucking insane 
I think I’m losing my brain 

[Verse]
Can you tell me once again 
Was I enough to be more then a friend 
Cause I ain want it to end 
I’m starting to think that we can
Do again fuck be friends 
I was with you to the end 
Girl let’s pretend we’re okay 
Cause I don’t want you to go away 

[Chorus]
I’m a wreck a whore a self abuser
You don’t wanna love me lose her
Bite my neck and grap the ruger 
I don’t wanna end this sooner 
Why do you just runaway 
When I don’t wanna play your games 
It’s driving me so fucking insane 
I think I’m losing my brain

insane

love letter lullaby (prod.sleeplessboy)

разбей все зеркала в моей квартире чтоб не видел себя
сломай остатки личности чтоб вылить накопившийся пар
оставь меня с тревогой что может случиться
внуши что я сошел с ума но не делай это быстро

от меня останется лишь маленькая копия
вам надо запомнить посещать мое надгробие

он копирует жесты но дышит иначе
это не человек для кого ты был важен
пустые глаза он тяжело ранен
он забыл кто он есть в погоне за вами

я ненавидел весь мир
и в этом нет вашей вины
в аду откроют двери
где меня будут ценить

разбей все зеркала в моей квартире чтоб не видел себя
сломай остатки личности чтоб вылить накопившийся пар
оставь меня с тревогой что может случиться
внуши что я сошел с ума но не делай это быстро


mixtape about my feelings
cover by www.youtube.com/@zasypaaayedits