Benedixhion

Hamilton - Major Leagues (Prod. 4am)

my brains full of anxiety
i popped 5 xans but i still can’t sleep
there’s nothing left of me 
so let me rest in peace
i jus dropped a grand on a fit
i’ve spent way more on all this xanax
it sucks
life hurts i’ve had enough
i can’t cope without drugs

all i need is you and thats true
fuck a squad and fuck a crew
 ima do what ima do
and bitch i’m making moves
i don’t know 
where the fuck i’m sposed to go
i been lost and on my own
cuz this whole live’s a lonely road

anxious666 [prod. sciptix]

skele’s cover of soft by YoungJZA, slowed and reverbed

skele - soft (slowed + reverb)

you were only tryna hurt me 
so i had to cut you off
cause i don’t give a fuck about a thing
no not at all
i be off tha percies everyday
i needa stop
but i don’t give a fuck about a thing
no not at all
i don’t give a fuck about a thing
so please don’t call
you were only tryna hurt me 
so i had to cut you off
cause i don’t give a fuck about a thing
no not at all
i don’t give a fuck about a thing
no not at all

dreaming of tha money
i was dreaming of tha bands
i was sitting in tha dark
until i finally made plan
i mix benzos with my fent
you ain’t my friend
n i know that
can’t take no more you’re a vex
my life is hell filled with regret
i’m jus wondering what’s next
but i keep on grindin
i never can ever stop 
this life is jus a pain
i fuckin hate it
thas why im always so sedated
i don’t know if i can take this
they tell me they love me
but i know they jus fuckin faking
oh well
thas life

idgafukk [prod quel]

sleep w a semi aint pinching a penny
wont let her post pics of the car we in
u play that petty shit like the olympics
ill bury a bitch where the garden is
hollowbody branded opulence
try it but u couldnt copy it
ride thru the city the girl im w pretty
she give me a lil more confidence

sleep w a semi aint pinching a-
aye, aye 
sleep w a semi aint pinching a penny wont-
aye, aye 
sleep w a semi aint pinching a penny
wont let her post pics of the car we in
ride thru the city the girl im w pretty
she give me a lil more confidence

wait, i got roses in the back
way im sliding in this porsche they think im frozen to the track
ill find a u, u fumbled tho
not too high till im comatose
gen 5 on me, always close
hollow like a flock of crows

im wearing bape but my bitch in celine
if u wanna talk better get a subpoena
i got a hundred rounds next to a beam
state of emergency better call FEMA

i know i got a limit, ill just make the most of it
she block my number but she still watch when im posting shit

sleep w a semi aint pinching a penny
wont let her post pics of the car we in
u play that petty shit like the olympics
ill bury a bitch where the garden is
hollowbody branded opulence
try it but u couldnt copy it
ride thru the city the girl im w pretty
she give me a lil more confidence

sleep w a semi aint pinching a-
aye, aye 
sleep w a semi aint pinching a penny wont-
aye, aye 
sleep w a semi aint pinching a penny
wont let her post pics of the car we in
ride thru the city the girl im w pretty
she give me a lil more confidence

uber black (bloodcryy)

Featuring: @bleakboi
Produced by: DZO DIGTIAL and @nickp3tro
Art by: DZO DIGITAL
Mixed by: DZO DIGITAL
Mastered by: DZO DIGITAL 

Lyrics:
You don't have the guts to be who you want to be (I won’t go down without a fight, tried to tell them 'bout my thesis)
You need people like me so you can point you're fuckin' fingers (I cant go down without a fight, DZO)
And say "that's the bad guy" (I won’t go down without a fight)
What does that make you? Good? (I cant go down without a, Huh)

I’m trying to find out where the light is (Where's the light?)
Come to find out got the touch like Midas, ha
I got depression, that’s a minus
Up in the night I don’t want it to get silent

Up in the night can’t sleep I got tinnitus 
Don’t wanna be leaving her, I’m sick of trying 
Would this be easier if I was lying?
It always comes to light
You see another side
 
Don’t know what you see in me (Huh)
I swear I'm being me (Yeah)
So many sides to see of me so please excuse my BPD (Hahaha)
It’s just a PSA, this my thesis
Wish you could see the pain, diaphoresis

How my heart begins to pick up rate
Me and p3tro on the beat, make it syncopate
i was caught like a dear in headlights
No fear, finally made it out the red light (I miss you, I miss you so much)
What's the point in even looking for a light?
No point, I didn’t see an end in sight
Even if the things you said ‘bout me were right
You still think I'm fly
Don’t wanna see you if you’re basic
No I can’t see you, need LAS, ha (LASIK)

I’m trying to find out where the light is
Come to find out got the touch like Midas, ha
I got depression, that’s a minus
Up in the night I don’t want it to get silent

Don’t know what you see in me (I don't know)
I swear I'm being me (Yeah)
So many sides to see of me please excuse my BPD (So many sides, Ha)
It’s just a PSA, this my thesis (PSA, Thesis)
Wish you could see the pain, diaphoresis

I won’t go down without a fight (I need this)
I cant go down without a fight (Tried to tell them 'bout my thesis)
I won’t go down without a fight (Suffer from diaphoresis)
I cant go down without a, Huh (I need it)
 
I'm down an alley
fighting anxiety (Anxiety)
This shit exciting
struck by bolt lightning 
I'm never tired
Gas fills my lungs (Mh)
It's a curse its mayhem, fuck (Fuck)
DZO and me we never stop we be grinding (We be grinding)
Can't hear us, walk in silence (Shh)
Where's the light at the end of the tunnel? (Where's the light)
fuck fame, swag is eternal (Hahaha)

Looking for a light
No point, I didn’t see an end in sight
Even if the things you said ‘bout me were right
You still think I'm fly (Wait)
Don’t wanna see you if you’re basic
No I can’t see you, need LASIK (Haha)

I’m trying to find out where the light is (Where's the light?)
Touch, got the touch like Midas, ha
I got depression, that’s a minus (Well that's a minus)
Up in the night I don’t want it to get silent

Don’t know what you see in me (I don't know)
I swear I'm being me
So many sides to see of me please excuse my BPD (Ha)
It’s just a PSA, this my thesis (thesis)
Wish you could see the pain, diaphoresis 

I’m trying to find out where the light is (I need it)
Come to find out got the touch like Midas, ha (Midas)
I got depression, that’s a minus (Minus)
Up in the night I don’t want it to get silent

Touch like Midas (well that's a minus)
Can't sleep I got tinnitus (No I don't want it)
Suffer from diaphoresis, yeah
Up in the night I don't want it to get silent

Stream

Where's the Light?

shawty said she love me but she hate me
I'm like fuck you bitch 
like whyd you even wanna date me
oh duh
you jus want tha fucking clout
im like fuck off
i keep going like im running on a race track
lil shawty if u love me then jus call my phone
i dont wanna go thru all this shit alone


relapse

Yung Van: https://soundcloud.com/itsyungvan
Deadsoon: https://soundcloud.com/deadsoon
___________________________
Lyrics: 
Lonely, I'm feeling lonely
You say you know me
If you really know me
Then tell me why I'm not enough
Tell me why I can't get up
Stuck beneath my sheets
I can feel the reaper running
I just want to sleep tonight
Insomnia has got me lost in my mind
I always try my best
Yeah, you know I try
But it's not enough
And I want to die

I want to die
I don't know why I try
I need you by my side
My side

Metaphorically
I know I'm not the one you need
But I wish that I was one
I'm like the moon without a sun
Pictures in my head
Keep me ridden in my bed
I'm a lonely, empty soul
Without you I'm all alone

Metaphorically
I know I'm not the one you need
I'm like the moon without a sun

I've been up
I've been down
I've been looking around
For a purpose
I'm lying right here on the ground
As I frown
'Cause there's nothing around to be found
So I'm down
Yeah, I'm down
All alone in this town

Tears sparkle like they're diamonds
I'm alone but you remind me
Of when I used to fake it
Now I feel like life's so basic

I don't want to wake up like this
Always feeling pissed
About my existence
And I wish I had friends
But I guess it's the end
Put my life in your hands
And I watch as it slips

Metaphorically
I know I'm not the one you need
But I wish that I was one
I'm like the moon without a sun
Pictures in my head
Keep me ridden in my bed
I'm a lonely, empty soul
Without you I'm all alone

Metaphorically
I know I'm not the one you need
I'm like the moon without a sun

Lonely feat. Yung Van & Dawson

Spotify <3

lonely feat. Yung Van & deadsoon [prod. heylog]

soundcloud.com/joel-villagran
soundcloud.com/iofmusic

& it was dark outside lastnight
i can’t remember were you there or had i closed my eyes?
a constant wreck i think i lost my mind
was that a recollection i made out of what i’d like?
& it’s so hard to get inside so tight
it’s not apparent to you number of the times i tried
& now i guess it finally comes to light 
i couldn’t see it even if it's only just a mile

i remember how it felt the way that you left 
it wasn't shit to me compared to what you'd do next
how you'd pretend you never cared & tried to prove it 
so why'd you do it?

make believe i wasn't there to keep from losing
run away you know you're scared to face the music
so what’s here left of me just take it you can use it
i won’t get through it 
i cut the loose end

xxajii:

every night it’s been keeping me up
every day got me losing my touch
you shoot me down & you sit there fine with it
i wasn’t sure if we would make it to the end
i’m barely needing you tonight 
don’t think we’ll make it out alive
cut by mistakes, hung out to dry
if you don’t mean it, don’t apologize
i won’t make you choose what you have to do
if i don’t have you, what is left to prove

Lastnight w/ Xxajii (prod. IOF)

capoxxo: https://soundcloud.com/capoxxo

lyrics:
who am i to judge
baby, yeah i know
i was freaking out
when you called my phone
i have nowhere to go
i smoke lots of dope
fucked up everything
it's so hard to take it slow
i cannot take your lies
i'm so damn hypnotized
and you're so beautiful
but i spark blunts to the skies
baby you know
we can do drugs in the skylights

i don't know
lil shawty, could you tell me where to go
i don't know if i can make it without you
if you love me then just tell me that you do
sick of feeling blue

there's nothing left of me
i think of it frequently
baby, if you don't hate me
why couldn't you just believe in me
you just came out of nowhere
and stole my heart, that shit's thievery
and you stayed for a while
i wonder what you could see in me

i wonder what you could see in me
i still wonder why you're leaving me
and i just wish we were meant to be
but i'll just fade in your memories
i just wanted something real
instead you gave me a fantasy
and there's nothing in that pill
i'll smoke my way back to sanity
not someone you want
i just fed into your vanity
just something to flaunt
guess it's a tragic reality

spotify <3

deaded w/ capoxxo [prod. 5v & odece]

i don’t think that i can change 
lately i been feeling stuck inside my ways
pretty sure my life is just a fucking waste
yeah
maybe i should go ahead and throw it all away

sick of life 
i wonder what’s after
i’m a fuck up
i’m a disaster
i wish that i would die faster
restless nights, could use dreamcatcher oh
‘cause you left me all alone
never even met you, only saw you on my phone
yeah
i still miss you on the low
i cannot stop thinking bout the day that you went ghost
yeah

so i’ll make it on my own
i don’t need you anymore, it’s time for me to go
yeah
all these girls are tryna hit this
they don’t really want me, but my name is on they hit lists
damn
so i think it’s time to dip bitch
i been chasing after my dreams
and yes i’ll risk it
you best get up out my way
i’m on a mission
you always got sum to say
but never listen

would you hold me close
i can’t let you go
you already know
how i feel bout you

spotify

dreamcatcher [prod. ahnboi]

popped off
yeah i did it
i been making smoking weed and making music for a living
goddamn
i split designer on my fit bitch
i been tryna cope by spending thousands on my wrist it’s
lit
and lately i been on my mischief shit
cuz i been really tryna make it big
i wish i wasn’t such a misfit kid
i’m always bleeding so my wrist stay slit

these drugs may have cost my soul but it’s worth it to me boo 
so i’m over it
cocaine in the bathroom stall like it’s 1982 took two lines n dipped

she hates what i have become
and i hate that i am so damn numb 
i pack my bong and fill up my lungs 
lately i been feelin so gone
i wish that i would just die
‘cause i’m already dying inside
i hate this world i hate my damn life
might just end it all tonight
don’t waste your time on me 
i wish that you could see
we just aren’t meant to be
i guess that you should leave

listen on spotify <3

nineteen82 [prod. number48]

feels like love but i know it isn’t
i’m so damn numb who’m i kidding
i hate life i wish that i didn’t
i’m poppin percs just to fix it
but i know that i’ll never fit in
an outlier to the human race
i’m a lost soul and i’m drifting
i wish that i could just be erased
i hate the me that i have become
i’m just a fiend and i need more drugs
off a thirty i’m so fucked up
i’m running out i best hit the plug
i took a journey with no way back ay
i got money i’m chasing so ima make that ay
she jus pass me a swisher so ima face that ay
if you ain’t talkin benjis then just get outta my face
please let me lie here
i wanna die here
i’m so sick of this life
i wanna give into my fears

pain in my head guess i’m broken
i’m already dead they don’t notice

its2much [prod. zach sutton]

let me die
i don’t really know what the point in life is
everybody knows that we won’t survive
i jus wanna go shawty i can’t fight this
always on my page but you never like
it’s fake
you ain’t really love me
that’s great
i been counting up my bankroll 
all day
i been drowning in my problems
let’s escape

i been in my bag
and i ain’t stoppin bitch
i love poppin tags
so i been shopping
i don’t understand
girl what’s your problem now
you make me feel dead
cuz you’re a toxin bitch
i already know your love is counterfeit
pretty sure she hates me but she loves my fits 
strung out on the daily but these drugs are bliss
i don’t wanna live i’m fucking done with this
i don’t know what i should do
i’m lost and missing you
i wish it wasn’t true
what the fuck am i gun do
oh whoa
i’m just dying in my room
oh no
i keep falling for you boo

why’s my mind feel like it’s a prison
i don’t understand
i just wanna life that’s worth living
won’t you hold my hand

toxin [prod. thatboineco]

thanks for 10k <3
prod. @prodjody

tired and tied down
i need you like right now
stuck in my own head
i can’t find the way out

too far gone
can’t save me
these drugs keep me steady
my heart gets so heavy
a ghost i’m nobody at all

feel like i don’t exist
and you’re my only fix
i got a thing for you
i want you in my room

feel like i’m made of glass
watch me break in half
weight up on my back
is slowly crushing me

fight for my sanity
everyday suffer silently
devil inside of me
but your touch feeling heavenly
it feels like ecstasy
bringing my feelings back to me
but ice cold in my heart
is all i’ll ever be

and your face in my dreams
is all i ever see
when i’m awake
my brains filled with anxiety

tired and tied down
i need you like right now
stuck in my own head
i can’t find the way out

too far gone
can’t save me
these drugs keep me steady
my heart gets so heavy
a ghost i’m nobody at all

deaded w/ capoxxo [prod. 5v & odece]

benedixhion

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