I dn’t wanna ᏰᏒᏋᏗᏖᏂ lik tht

man this is fkn GORGEOUS  🥲🥲🥲🥹🥹🥹‼️

7/28/22
prod. @everythingmackk

i've sent too many sorries
and my phone is gonna die soon
i should've learned something
at least more than a thing or two
like what is worth to a person
who cherishes the dirt on their shoes
do i turn a blind eye to my own cries?
or fear the rest of my youth

cause i don't wanna force who i am
as i pour another cup, with trembling hands
over half of my life's being made without plans
i get it; if i made a choice, 
i'd surely regret it
but most of all my worries,
i can't fit them in the pensmanship
you simply wouldn't get it
even if you really listening
the center of my soul don't only glow
it's also glistening
my demons start to part as i'm
pouring the nitroglycerin

it only feels like i'm here when i'm
stun-locked in third gear, and a 
dozen million miles away from reality
i hope forever ain't forever
unless it has to be
cause i don't wanna go out in misery
let go, of whatever this meant to me
fuck that
imma go on a killing spree

emma, i'm sorry for everything.

it's my fault you let me go
met in the seventh grade
we went separate roads
cause of some stupid shit i'd say
i just tore up all my clothes
courtesy of missing your face
if i finally break this mold
i'll thank you some day

i've sent too many sorries
and my phone is gonna die soon
i should've learned something
at least more than a thing or two
like what is worth to a person
who cherishes the dirt on their shoes
do i turn a blind eye to my own cries?
or fear the rest of my youth

this ain't just a knack
it's a passion
double shame on you 
for thinking all i do is actin'
part of me is straight
the rest is being held captive
living in a cavern where arachnids and bats been
constantly refracting

yeah, but i'm not worried about it
i'm entangled in this string
tryna gnaw my way out it
you had liked a post of mine 
a while back when i doubted
if i was truly good for nothing
based on how low the clouds been...

clouds to crows

clouds to crows [prod. mackk]

cover of jude's (sleepwater) "nervous"
guitar by caves
reprod by me


miss you bro :(

sleepwater - nervous (cover)

featuring safeatlast -https://soundcloud.com/safeatlast
produced by Ciche&Jarn - https://www.youtube.com/@cichejarn


there's blood on my hands oh christ
can't deal with myself all the time
won't open my eyes

fucked it up now i don't even wanna go home
i got problems with myself 
don't leave me alone
wanna melt my brain 
thoughts lead to overload
i cant see a future without overdose

without overdose
baby I might go comatose
xannies in my coat
put another paycheck in my nose

not addicted but I don't know how I could recover
if I was would you still be there for me not another

teenage suicide another stat another number
for the masses

back in school I almost o-d'd on a fuckin Xanax

I would show up off the wall like vans to all my classes

I can't see the future maybe I just need my glasses

fucked it up now i don't even wanna go home
i got problems with myself 
don't leave me alone
wanna melt my brain 
thoughts lead to overload
i cant see a future without overdose
x2

overdose (ft. safeatlast) [Ciche&Jarn]

Huge thanks to notahero for killing this. Like, Repost, and Comment if yall rocking with this one <3
Produced by The Sound Clown (a haze collective producer btw) and tiedforsilver!

**lyrics**

(You only hit my phone when you don’t feel alright, 
I’m at your beck & call, but I’m still some other guy)

I think it’s time I packed a bag and ran away 
In case you even cared, I still feel the same 
You tell me that you’re here and it’ll be okay
I’m breaking like the leaves in this winter rain 

You tell me those three words, I can’t trust that
Brand new silver Benz, feelings on the dash yeah
I might just hit 100, never going back
I’m feeling presidential when I count my stacks 

You just wanna break my bones and that’s fine, 
Were those tears even real I saw when you cried?
It was already hard to trust now it’s worse by 10 times 
You left me with no choice, I’m leaving tonight

I’ve been in this race and it’s making me exhausted
shawty filled with hate, and we losing all our progress
Ain’t got the time to waste but you’ll bury me in August, yuh, in August, yuh, in August

Saw it in her eyes, she like messing with my conscience
Wishing I could change, I don’t know if I can solve it
Moving to the day that I’ll be inside a coffin
A coffin, yuh, a coffin

I think it’s time I packed a bag and ran away 
In case you even cared, I still feel the same 
You tell me that you’re here and it’ll be okay
I’m breaking like the leaves in this winter rain 

You tell me those three words, I can’t trust that
Brand new silver Benz, feelings on the dash yeah
I might just hit 100, never going back
I’m feeling presidential when I count my stacks

(notahero)
i’m starting to feel like i’m a junkie but i’m not ready to be done yet
i fear i’m falling into the void come grab my outstretched hand
so high i’m seeing into the future, but i don’t know where imma land

we got the whole weekend, baby what’s the point in getting mad?
tommy jacket on me, cuz it’s way too cold for july
got something special in my cup i think my brain might get fried

and would u cry baby if tonight’s the night that i died?
but i could never let u go baby ur way too special
a new shirt after i smoke to be respectful
a new number i’ve never seen on top the dashboard

i might just pack my things and go, i don’t want to stop when i’m home
cuz this winter rain outside so wet and cold

and i’m too fucking drunk to see straight, baby i feel nauseous
a different type of dumb in your head to say i ain’t popping
it’s blue it’s not a green thumb cuz i’m counting hundreds
i shake it into a tornado like a fucking mosh pit

Girl I’m loving you cuz everything you do is flawless,
You could stop it but i don’t wanna stop it
(No I don’t wanna)

bury me in august w/ notahero (Prod. The Sound Clown & tiedforsilver)

lyrics⬇️
crushing the thoughts that been breaking me down
how could i write so much and you never liked my sound
voluntarily always around
but now ur making me feel a way so i gotta get out

lie on the cold ground
duplicate that feeling that you thought you found
maybe this my chance maybe right now
yea or I’ll suffocate in advance if i dont fight it out
even lookin at these plants i i feel like i dont amount 
to all the beauty that they hold cuz i cant even count all the times that i would fold at the fault of my mouth
even when i promised everyone it wouldn’t go south

late gigs knowing that you wont be there

paint a pictire for me knowing that i will not fear

yea cuz i wont breathe ur judgy person air
for once it might be nice to be all the way out your hair

ill push back i dont like it when it feel like that

no crash pad when im falling i fall down hard flat
i dont even have the energy to feel bad
i dont see anyone who wanted a rematch
i been pushin in my memories like way back
Yea u dont want anything like this you want a price tag
money dont mean anything if you cant even buy that 
promise youd be runnin from me if you knew what i had

i live i laugh
but i dont wanna use the stuff that hurts the people most
wait until the night pass
then ill stay low
cuz thats the way that itll last

(Weepings)

We've been on and off like every other week I fucking swear
Girl you got me crashing out; You got me growing out my hair
I'm doing all these drugs to pretend like I don't care ...
But I do too much
Girl I know you fucked him I feel nauseous but I still miss your touch 
Smoking on some potent pop some oxy till my brain turn dust
I'm bleeding out my back I'm just your toy and my heart soft like plush
A puppet on your string an I will wait for you to treat me such
~
Cuz if the pain I feel is cause by your hands I don't mind
I showed you my darkest parts and you left me behind
Who knew that my love for you would leave me feeling blind
Girl no matter where I go you're still stuck in my mind
~
And flashback to the moment that I met you
Even then I knew I cannot forget you
I remember how you looked at me the night I loved you
But now I fear I'm falling short
Back and forth, every time we speak it feels like we in court
God it hurts, Knowing that the girl I love left me in dirt
What am I holding onto still, like bro ... that hoe left me first
I could never trust another soul, like I trusted you
I still got love for you
I wish you loved me too
Girl honestly I can't see my future with another fucking person in this life

voluntarily w/ Weepings (cxrter x yunnygoldz)

Lyrics: 

(hero)

she said
"if you gave me time, i could listen"
"i can't read your mind, you've been distant"
i been steady pouring drink in the kitchen
i know we just talk, but i don't really like you kissed him
couldn't find it in the text that you sent me
maybe i could find it wadded in the bedsheets
you said 
"we could work it out"
"you won't let me"
you just worked it out when you decided you could drop me

(ekeon)

I don't wanna tell em what you did then
You think its funny when you splurge my name
You dissin
You call me addict 
Call me fake 
Call me villain
But I know it 
When you all alone
You listen

If you leave me what am I now
I could find my way but really 
I don't know how
I could love you more but really that's a false vow
Is that how you really feel 
I don't know now

It's getting hard to stay focused 
You know that I'm trying you're my antidote its
Something that I can notice
These words to the lost
Are all from a lotus

Hold my arm
I promise 
You'll be strong
Don't take it close to heart 
I will not fall apart

(hero)

(BUT IM LYING)

huh
she said
"if you gave me time, i could listen"
"i can't read your mind, you've been distant"
i been steady pouring drink in the kitchen
i know we just talk, but i don't really like you kissed him
couldn't find it in the text that you sent me
maybe i could find it wadded in the bedsheets
you said 
"we could work it out"
"you won't let me"
you just worked it out when you decided you could drop me

Hold my arm
I promise 
You'll be strong
Don't take it close to heart 
I will not fall apart
but I'm lying

Chicken Gordita

Chicken Gordita w/ Hero (uforia)

prod by me and jacob vallen

wont eat for a while
my stomaches been aching
and im not myself 
not as of lately
few months ill heal right? im hardly inpatient
its not feeling real, counting cracks in the pavement
takes all i have to pull my anchor out
i dont know who i am, know everything about u
takes all i have, to make the words come out
im making nothing last, im pretty anxious now
 
dont tell me "people change" like you look down on me
you always said "its nothing" its alot to me
started turning heads, wont look back at me 
was just more of the same a little differently
giving nothing back 
its not important now
things u take for granted 
let my anger out 
i just cant grasp it
nah, its not important now

takes all i have to pull my anchor out
i dont know who i am, know everything about u
takes all i have, to make the words come out
im making nothing last, im pretty anxious now

for a while

lyrics ⬇️


we dont talk abt it enough
lately when i wake up
im tremblin no luck
turn my emotions to dust
it’s sickening down in my gut
life isnt all about love
its about all that you got

right
right to leave me there when i was wrong
nothing you could do to make strong
(cuz i was lost)
i cant be the one to lead you on
see me one more time and next time ill be gone

i dont wanna think like that
i dont wanna breathe like that no more
and i dont mean scream my bad
and i been really feeling real bad
it goes down to my core
maybe ill be better off alone
secluded outside away from my home

(notahero)

lyrics

i don’t really ask for much
and i won’t be here for too long
the only cool thing is the songs
you tell me a hits on the tip of my tongue
but i bite my tongue
i say all the things that i shouldn’t have
i try not to care bout the should’ve had
as long as u still love me in the end
oh but baby i been struggling since last halloween
and youre the only reason im sleeping
got your smell on my sheets
if only i could’ve turned out the way i wanted to be

i know that you hate the way that i feel
i know all that you wanted was just something real
but i don’t even feel real
oh but i don’t want to feel like that
and she wonder why my songs so sad
baby there’s not an emotion that i wish i don’t have
it’s like i try to spark my feelings but it just turn to ash
it just turn to ash

better off alone w/ notahero (under the maple tree)

lyrics 

as the sleet pours on me
i
seen
in a whole nother
light
can u stay with me
r u feeling me
im not feeling me
why
ive 
spent plenty nights alone
but you feel a little bit like home
do you love me how
im loving you
is it even true
or not

ready or not they take me quick to my hell
and if this is my life i wont take it well
flooded concrete 
dying cells
bleed my dry
for my cards are dealt

break my back
crack my head open
and drink from the hollowed out bit of my skull 
days turn nights
like 50 times
still it continues to take a hold

burning circles into the wall
i been here a week n already i been mauled
havent ate in 3 days but i still hold on
i still hold on
promise i still hold on

nighttime
isnt so fun
with a wooden bed
chained to the wall
with daggers pointed in my head
i must admit 
im sorry for being mia
just be glad rn that im not kia

as the sleet pours on me
i
seen
in a whole nother
light
can u stay with me
r u feeling me
im not feeling me
why
ive 
spent plenty nights alone
but you feel a little bit like home
do you love me how
im loving you
is it even true
or not

better off alone w/ notahero (under the maple tree)

brecken

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