i dont wanna be myself 
i wanna be someone else 
right now, i know 

i changed my mind, ill go to hell
just feed me and keep me in a cell
spend everyday needing so much fucking help
ill tell you the secret and see if you tell 

im not afraid of falling anymore 
i stare at the face 
i ignore features that look the same
theres a hook in my face
pull it out another one forms behind it
instantly cut off circulation
i feel my eyelids flutter as i struggle to sit
i just collapse to my knees in a fit
coughing, laughing, dry heave
punch my fist against the seat and the lid 

theres a message in here somewhere !
changing lanes
ill stay in mine
you stay insane
i love this crowd
dog bites man 
man drops a hydrogen bomb on the ground 
i got a sweet tooth 
i like it when i find hidden objects
i see you
underneath the grass
rubbing against me 
touch it, whats the difference?
ask me if its empty
over turn the glass and get every single last drop out 

oh god its fit right in the palm of my hand now 
rejected blessing i see the angel it shines down
im happy to have the plaque scrapped from my teeth
i added gems to my canines
im playing with them as we speak 

i lie and i steal things
try to be revealing 
off putting !!!
show me where i lost footing
lip service
cock sucking dick circus 
ill be at auction but all of this shits worthless

couldnt begin to imagine how that happened
hey, look over there! 
spit in a napkin!
are you kidding? im asking
are you shitting in my hand or wishing on black magic?
you didnt understand
sometimes its okay to match the energy of your worst man
im the dead spy, i got two red eyes
ill let you guess why i stare out my blinds paranoid
people around me notice and im afraid that theyre annoyed
or think im crazy, and maybe theyre right
backdrop: illusion of contact
age it until it tastes like a safe ride
take you home in the back of a sports car
godly intention so pure as im sure that yours are

i dont wanna be myself
i wanna be someone else

Numbing Agent

slimy oozing bubbling stuff erupting

touching all my clean white t shirts

dont ask me where ive been or ill have to lie

floating

in reference to my weekend

asleep behind the wheel 

havent eaten

feels good

try to keep it real

my body armor is so camoflaughed, bitch!

its got invisible rocket launchers right on it

holding on to way too much

watching my hair grow 

fucked up    

broken bones 

i notice those hurt the most when you wake up and remember how they happened



time for altered vision 

betrayed

i know you feel that way 

while im indifferent

betrayed 



who do i need to hurt?

to make shame a motivator that will work 

and after that sustain an outlook 

without constantly reminding me of how long it took

i know it wont be like before



i never believed that 

i know we both see that i need to do more 

i said i agree that 

this shit wont stop driving a wedge in the floor     



exceptions 

satisfaction is guaranteed

except when i dont land on my feet 

exceptions

i love them

just please love me  



and im a beast when 

my anger reaches my dome 

its just a circle

but it is all ive ever known

Bad Boy Cat Toy

Seventh track on Bad Happy.

A bit of an "anthem" for those of you who have a propensity to compromise yourself and overlook unfair mistreatment by your friends and other loved ones for the sake of keeping the relationships intact... I'm quite prone to this.

Even after years of being hurt by people I know who have cheated on me, belittled my accomplishments and talent, ditched me, ignored my calls and emails, forgot to do important things they said they would for, broken promises, violated my trust, and whatever else, for the sake of nothing but themselves, I've still generally stayed un-confrontational about betrayal, essentially making it okay to betray me.
I wanted to approach this topic in a constructive manner, as often I do, but not be too subtle about the message.

If you're in a position where you are compromising your own happiness to keep your life less dramatic and your friends groups without schism; relationships without quarrel: don't keep doing it. Try to find common ground.
If they remain obstinate, they aren't worth your time.

/Life lesson

Betrayal is okay.

There are US tour dates coming in August and November which you can see more abt on my instagram as the story develops. Special thanks to nora who suggested adding some piano
https://www.instagram.com/dei_genetrix/


"It's perfectly alright to step outside the law, because the law itself is aberrated" 
-L. Ron Hubbard

Darkness, We live in some
Darling, please give me up
Sometimes, it seemed like hope
Promise, you didn't-
Don't
Assume there's something here for you
I thought it thru.
Every single chance we ever got we only fucked it up
I think its wrong to lead me on
Don't assume 
It's just us two
Me and you
We're having fun
But I cannot live with myself and 
I'm still so scared of touch

Really
Don't fuck with me nowhere
But then, it's just not what I need
Say that we're put here for something, that's something that I can't believe
Think that I'm living my life, I think I'm a mistake 
Thought that we're reaching for something did worse than just get in your way
It's not a test
We play for keeps
We make a mess  
Who'll clean up me?

Clean up me?

Please don't hate me.
Also, this is just a 'basic song' from POS.




SHITTUNE - PASSENGER OF SHIT #9

CHARLlE KlRK WAS A GUY THAT DROPPED OUT OF COLLEGE TO JOIN A GANG. THAT WAS HIS FIRST CHOICE OF WHAT HE WANTED TO DO, CAREER-WISE. NO CRAP HE GOT POPPED BY SOMEONE IN HIS OWN CLIQUE. USUALLY WE DON'T MOURN THIS TYPE OF GUY UNLESS WE'RE RELATED TO THEM. I THINK IT'S ACTUALLY SO SAD THAT THIS HAD TO HAPPEN... IN THE SAME 24 HOURS THAT THE US SENATE VOTED TO CONCEAL THE E-------N FILES...

I bent my head
I bend my spine forever
You hold my hand
I know I hold your hand too hard
Curl up in a circle
So broken-skin, so raw
There was a girl who was ugly forever and ever, amen
I swear it never gets easier
I swear it never gets better
I know if I admit to pain, we'll live the pain together
Too bad
So much gets said
But what gets it done?
What gets it done?

I know I look dumb
The type of dumb you would want
I want a lot to be blunt
It’s like you’re right all along

I wanted to be in love
I wanted to feel love but I'm just not like that
I wanted to be in love
I wanted to feel love but I’m just not like that

I 
I wanted something more than you could give
I
I
I wanted something more than you could give me

I hope you get to stay the way you are
I start to lose my posture
My spine sticks out the back of my neck
My hand, hitched up on angles
So broken-skin, still so raw to the touch
A finger in the wound is never enough for me
I swear it only gets easier
I swear it only gets better
I know if i admit to pain, we’ll live the pain together
If the road becomes the goal
We’ll ride it out to blackness
I try so hard
All fxcking day
All my efforts work backwards

My Neck

The 2nd last single leading up to the release of "I'm It!'
Art source Color_LES's Mage & Demon Queen
www.webtoons.com/en/comedy/mage-and-demon-queen/list?title_no=1438

"When I was a kid that was a soccer field, and it's already a recycling center"

I live thru wrong decisions
I built my world around them
Lets play the cards we're given
Let’s break the rules around how it goes
How it goes
If you watch you can kinda still see how it goes

Lets try harder in the future maybe we could do better
Put in a little effort, are we only living if they let us?
Lets break the spell around it, lets spell it out in shining letters
Theres living fountains spouting
Theres resounding laughter when they see us

Let me get inside it I can prove that this is worth the price-uh--
I tried to make it right and all my options s*******l
I tried to speak my mind but it came out so all one-sided
If I only stayed behind there might be things to keep an eye on
Let it get inside me I can prove I'm worth the price-uh-
You're why so serious and acting like it's do or dire
I feel a bit stressed out but then I think that I really like it
I can't stand anything bout my life but then I'm really lying

What I had to in the moment
I did what I had to in the moment
Guess our lives are made up of little moments
You could make the wrong choice on every single one of them

Lets try harder in the future maybe we could do better
Put in a little effort, are we only living if they let us?
Lets break the spell around it, lets spell it out in shining letters
Theres crimson fountains spouting, just resounding laughter when they see it

They're looking at me and I'm looking their way
I know you're hungry, look you're licking your plate
NAZ✓ng nothing so I step off the stage
Not saying nothing kinda crazy these days
They're looking at me like I'm pulling a face
I'm not authentic yea we all make mistakes
We're sending signals like we're playing charades
I'm looking at you and you're looking my way

I guess I’ll let it happen
I think I’d keep my head down
Think I’ll let it happen

They're Looking At Me

Allgear submission for iomods The End Of An Era. Got 7th over all.
I believe if you play the game associated with this comp, this song will play every so often but I'm not certain about that.

The Snake Hole

@rooksfeather & @neotenomie
the most 🔥🔥🔥 album about gay trash, chronic pain & dissociation you've heard all year 

help me do what i like if you like what i do: https://www.patreon.com/ESPer99

SUPEREGO ROYAL JELLY

👉👉👉 OWN IT

rook&nomie - SUPEREGO ROYAL JELLY - 04 YEARWOUNDS

In 2011 I played an event in Detroit called Ultra Mega Awesome Extreme. At the show a fan, rather overwhelmed by my presence, asked me if I'd be playing You're A Bad Cat Man. Due to the nature of the show, I had already made the setlist and couldn't deviate from it, but I said I'd try to work it in.
In the midst of playing the set, I completely forgot about trying to play the song.

The following year, I was asked to participate again, so I made sure to put it in the setlist and play it. However, the song is so old that it says nothing of where I am musically, so I reworked the entire song. This is what I did for that show... and then I recorded new vocals for some reason.

You're A Bad Cat Man (You're A Bad 2012 Man mix)

ACROBAT OVER A VAT OF ACID CRAP

REJECT IRONY
EMBRACE DISCOMFORT
LOVING BLISS AT LIGHTSPEED

SPAZZPOP FOREVER
(2005 - FOREVER)

MESSAGE ME FOR COMMISSIONS

Icon by fudo_monsuta on twitter

The Snake Hole

Bubblegum Octopus