construct

feat. @sewerperson & @riverstreaming
produced by riverrrr

backbone w/ sewerperson & riverrrr

Stay Quiet (maxim, thirtysins)

feat @cam_b22
prod cxrter x tahtx 

lyrics;

its hard to think when ur sinking in this tar
i hate myself so much but i 
swear this music shit gonna make me a star
i should of picked up my guitar more
should of been better from the start
but its not to late to get there
play this music from my heart
i built this, i played my part
i write until i fall apart
each song i write is about the same girl that never gave me her heart
it was all in my head from the start

but-but-but

why do u hit me up when ur lonely
play with my head, i'm already in your hand
i'm not rich, im not smart, and most of all im not him
I'm the exact opposite
but i think you like that
im just like one of your opiates

i try my hardest to not trip over this bitch
but that mood ended quick
wake up sad and sink into my bed
than i finally crawl out
we all end up lonely in the end
i can count the people i call my friends on one hand
always told me i was better than i am 
girl ill never be that man
so stay away

caramel;
it ain't hard to tell i was never rlly needed here
blacked out curtains so i never see the sun in here
so fuck it dear i guess i'll my breathing here
i love here the spirits made a home in me

at least they fucking notice me
and they don't take offense to the broken me
the way u do is way too fucking openly
oh its choking me

i know our time is wearing thin
we both know ur lies are breaking down
i can see it now oh it's sinking in
its rlly sinking in

it ain't hard to tell i was never rlly needed here
the more i fucking fell in that river i been bleeding in
exerting fear i hate it here
i really fucking hate it here

better than i am w/ Caramel

shout out kay for the artwork <3 
will add lyrics later...
 
Wonder bout my past lives

Wonder what I slept like 

Wonder if I loved right 

Must've been good just to earn your light

You're everything I needed, everything I pleaded for You've given me and more. 
I'm that again, I'm back again. Feeling like myself, I'm not sad again.
I'm not mad again. 
Moving on from some shit that had me twisted. 
So please don't rock the boat, you might make me seasick. 
Last one I was on went down with a weird wind. I don't feel the same now, this is not a fair wind. 
I was forewarned of a sea that was covered in wars, like you. 
You were covered in thorns and I felt like the warning wasn't needed before. 
And I still feel like I don't need it. 
Cause I don't want my love to be a secret. 
Cause I couldn't keep it, our love a secret. 
I know you really mean it, I know you really mean it. 
When you say you love me, I can fucking feel it. 
I really hope your love can't be depleted.

I wonder about my past lives.

I wonder if I slept right.

I wonder if I loved just right. 

I must've been good to deserve your light.

In the end this ship was just the fodder.
I still have time before it sinks underwater. 
I still have time to raise a son or daughter. 
That's a lie, I don't have that time left. Like a good captain I'll go down with my ship. 
Even in the end I don't wanna leave you with this.
This guilt, this trip. 
You pulled me in and I thought I could win but I guess not. 
and these thorns I've been pulling on my chest a lot. 
In these memories I've been trying to guess a lot. 
In these words I wonder if they were mine or not. 
Your life I wonder if it was mine or not. 

I wonder about my past lives.

wonder if I slept right.

wonder if I loved right.

 must've been good to get this light.

wonder about my past lives.
wonder about my past lives.

seasick (prod. secre x jolst)

pampelmuse

@cam_b22

i just planned a meet up with a razor blade
since it's the only thing that seems to take the pain away
i don't feel a thing no more
i had made a home on the floor
nothing fucking matters anymore
lemme die
for way too fucking long i had tried
and i got nowhere
im a fuck up

i can see the stars take form
i can feel the spirit world
i can feel the dark in my core
i can't feel my face anymore
i can feel my breathing getting hoarse

i just threw back my third shot
115 grains of that lead rock
turn my fucking brain off

now i'm sinking deeper in this fourth shot
i don't really matter i'm a dead god
look into my eyes they bloodshot
holy fucking shit i'm so fucked up
i don't feel pain since i'm too tough
i just blocked it out wit the 5th shot
really i don't care if i get got

i just planned my death with the 12 gauge
turn my face to sludge like cobain
make it disappear like it's slenderman
bitch you gotta find the 12th page
i don't think i'll ever be okay
i just can't seem to catch a real break
so i'm ending this in my own way
finna blow this up like propane

i just planned a meet up with a razor blade
since it's the only thing that seems to take the pain away
i don't feel a thing no more
i had made a home on the floor
nothing fucking matters anymore
lemme die
for way too fucking long i had tried
and i got nowhere
im a fuck up

oh god im such a failure (Caramel)

@cam_b22

there's something in my mind telling me to kill u too
so when i see ur face in hell i'll know it's rlly u
i hear demons in the walls and i can sometimes see them too
they're guiding all i do and they keep me on the move
keep me tethered here in trances feeding off of you
shadow men define the proper place to bury you
your life will be forgotten since i know just what to do
they're calling off the searches in the forest, guess you lose

i decay internally i never really matter here
fuck what they had heard of me since im a changed man
i love to practice surgery in the comfort of my home
it don't matter what they heard of me they'll never find the bones
there's something in my mind telling me to kill u 2
so when i burn in hell forever u can feel it too
there's voices in my head, taught me how to tie a noose
and how to hide the evidence from ppl just like u

killu2 (Caramel)

i don't know why u lovin me
all this shit just too tough to me
oh this world don't mean much to me
but at least with ur company
i'm at peace for tonight at least
(as much as i can, at least)

as much as i try to be
something better to comfort you
oh the demons inside me
say its better to hide from you
or you'll try to decide for me
try to force my autonomy
into something not meant to be
it's better to die than lose

rainbow of substances
blue mixed with red tonight
bottle in both hands
save the pills for another time
voices in my head say that im gonna die
i'm hearing sirens and calls of the other side
i hear the spirits plot on my soul tonight
i really don't fear it, i'm used to this all the time 

i dont know why u trusting me
my own head is the enemy
i need oceans of love at least
to be happy internally
for a moment of fucking peace
fighting demons inside of me


idk why u love me still (secre)

That Flavor

witchcraft, how your words control me

New music out whenever I feel like it

idk why u love me still (secre)

Caramel

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