misery

produced by https://soundcloud.com/fkwt27 

lyrics:
I saw it coming 
was already running 
anticipated the heartbreak
that's why I make my legs shake 
I'm too afraid to take 
that blade to my wrists 
I don't want scars 
don't wanna remember this
starving myself cuz I can't eat 
anxiety it makes me weak 
I feel nausea I feel weak 
I don't wanna live like this 
why can't I just call it quits 
you and me are not the same 
I'll always just take the blame
fuck you for the words you say 
you make me feel guilty 
for living every day 
I'm sorry that I let you down 
I see it in your frown 
And I know you're never proud
I would leave this earth 
If I knew it wouldn't
hurt the ones around me 
suicide cross my mind 
but I downplay my issues 
and tell you i'm fine 

I'm fine really you don't have to worry about me, it okay I’ll be okay it’s fine

The saddest part is that I saw it coming 
this isn't new, this is nothing new to me 
I knew you'd tell me you love me 
and I knew you'd leave 
and I knew I would be here feeling empty 
still wondering why I'm not good enough 
to make anyone stick around long enough 
to get to know me
but it's okay I'm fine everything will be okay
I just need a little time

saw it coming (prod.fkwt)

i been thinking about my ex 2 much

Nostalgia (noun) - a sentimental longing or wistful affection for the past, typically for a period or place with happy personal associations.

Nostalgia is something that has always troubled me, as I found that it's difficult to properly put my emotions towards it into words. It's not necessarily, or at least in my opinion, a happy or sad emotion, it's just something that we feel. Remembering a possibly warped perception of the past to focus on because the present seems so grim. Looking back upon my childhood and early teenage years does invoke a sense of melancholy and nostalgia, and I tend to think that things were much more simple back then. Maybe it's because the problems of that time are over now that I am able to look at them so clearly, as the problems of the present are shrouded in fear and uncertainty.

I remember stomping through the woods with my friends, then going home to play my gamecube or gameboy, not really caring or thinking about the world around me. Maybe I get stressed out when thinking about nostalgia because I can't properly explain how it makes me feel, whether it's positive or negative, I'm not sure.

It's like a purple mist that surrounds distant memories, just slightly altering my perception of that time. It's interesting.

Thanks for listening <3

Retro Fantasia [prod. xmichaelwarren]

this song did not want to be uploaded...

Lyrics:
sometimes i feel lonely too

february...

All this liquor in my fucking veins
You said your better 
But you havent changed
Watch my blood flow into the drain
Got these pills to medicate my brain
Im not happy but they keep me sane
And i dont talk because they think im strange
If u dont like me better switch your lane
February is my new name
And im sorry that i let go
I let the cold seep into my bones
I only come alive when it fucking snows
Im sorry but i have to go

YOU WALKED OFF
AND I LOST HOPE
IF YOU LEFT ME
WHERE WOULD I GO

Spotify

sometimes i feel lonely too (fantom)

It’s empty inside my heart 
I’ve got Nothing to give I feel so torn apart 
300 miles away from you, it’s too far 
Wish up on a star 
to heal up all of my scars 
I had to go 
I feel so emotionally unavailable 
you’d never know 
cause I’ll always stay so unstable 
I feel so emotionally unavailable 

so lonely it’s inescapable 
I know that you’re so irreplaceable 
your love was gravitational 
my damage unforgettable 
every time I lied 
you became more observational 

Now I sit in silence 
fuck all of the violence 
sick of all this fighting 
broke my heart I’m crying 
I just need some guidance 
Cant you see I’m trying 
to change my ways, your highness 
I present you with this diamond 

Remember 
every winter comes with this weather 
The same breeze that we felt in December 
reminds me of all the times 
I drove for miles just to see your face 
I wish that I could do this right but it’s too late 
left alone with scars on my heart 
you didn’t want to move far 
and now I’m broken so I try to live through my art

emotionally unavailable (prod. Afterlife x Xxajii)

tell me that it's all a lie, that u loved me for life

prod @thersx

tell me that it's all a lie

prod by meeeee

lyrics: 
staring at my ceiling 
idrk if im livin 
i cant feel shit
baby if you love me then tell me i cant feel it
i dont wanna do this alone
im still healing


hate me or love me
u do what u please
im makin money
i do it with ease
real bad bitch
and she all on her knees
real bad bitch
and she ridin wit me

got no friends 
ya they all switched up
in the back all alone
ya im all fucked up x2


ion got time for lies and bullshit
petty mfs always pulling some hoe shit
if u dont know my name
youll know it
i feel pain but i dont show it


its a lonely road im walking
skeletons up in my closet
life goes fast and i cant pause it

im still healing

cover art by @faetihx
ily <3
prod @emptychest
shout out @imkt

Lyrics:

Heart beat going fast
And im sad now
Everynight everyweek i just black out
She always text never never go out
got a text from my plug holdup gotta go now
Same drugs 
Same weed
I dont really give a fuck
Ghost me
No hugs no kisses
I left that boy in stitches
If he want to fight again
He gonna turn into a digit
Then im gunna kiss his mistress
Gotta stay on track ghost recon 
With the mission
Kt packed the new bowl 
Losing count of the spinich
Im counting up the fucking minutes 
Till i fucking break
Can you stay
I dont want to lose ur face

Heart beat going fast
And im sad now
Everynight everyweek i just black out
She always text never never go out
got a text from my plug holdup gotta go now
Im tired of this shit
And im tired of the pain
All these words in brain
I just posted a new tweet
Why she all up on my page
Why she gotta call 
When she not even my main
im too fucked up

ghost me (prod. emptychest)

imsomarcus - Pipe Down [prod. yungzay]

wrong from right <laayz>

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alt acc: @february14th
mgmt: deadboymikemgmt@gmail.com