hiraeth. eight months in the making.
featuring: @onlyfriendyeah
produced by: @lindenblossom
cover art by: @ejcarrmusic
i hope you enjoy <3
thank you for everything.

lyrics:
it feels like im missing something
a portrait unfinished
my life has been next to nothing
a chord thats diminished

cuz i’ll wait for change
and better days
just to come home with nothin
or maybe i’ll
just stay the same
cuz im too good at suffering
and i could always
take the blame
for all of my shortcomings 

hiraeth
i'm feeling the silence now
i can’t return, i'm fallen
my fragile body’s calling
i'm violent
feel like i'm dying now
i'm breaking down, i'm fallen
maybe it’s all for nothin

(onlyfriend)
maybe it's all for nothing
all the choices i make lead me closer to the coffin
no i can't take the weight of the changes
and i don't rly know what i'm doing
just pretend that you can't see me fading
and shy away raising no alarms
like i'm safe from harm
when i'm too far gone
and i can't hear a word from you

hiraeth
i'm feeling the silence now
i can’t return, i'm fallen
my fragile body’s calling
i'm violent
feel like i'm dying now
i'm breaking down, i'm fallen
maybe it’s all for nothin

(both)
hiraeth
i'm feeling the silence now
i can’t return, i'm fallen
my fragile body’s calling
i'm violent
feel like i'm dying now
i'm breaking down, i'm fallen
maybe it’s all for nothin

hiraeth (feat. onlyfriend) [linden]

spotify!

love u all <3
vocals by harvest & @hammy
production by @memoryroseishere @gonetoofar @morgnbates & harvest
art/mix/master by harvest

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/6ivVlTzoSvE6xLDtLdHp6g?si=bcafbe00735c440c

lyrics:
(hamilton)
i watched our love die fast
i never knew bout that
i saw it all turn bad
now i don’t want you back

woke up and my mind is spinning
woke up and the whole world’s ending
still searching to feel something
still feeling like i’m nothing

got a spark in my heart
i got smoke in my lungs
should’ve known from the start
you were never the one

im not the one that you want
why you put up a front
playing me like im dumb
make me feel like a dub

baby im done
yeah im movin on
you can call my phone
but i’m already gone

yeah im already ghost
i can’t let you close
no i don’t know
so my heart stay closed
no i don’t know
i just can’t tell
fucked up in the head
i can’t trust
one minute im cool
then the next im manic
crushing scripts up
under plastic

rolling spliffs up
i can’t feel shit
when i can’t think
that’s my favorite
when you kissed me
i just lost it
wishing i could’ve told
what it costed

(harvest & hamilton)
i watched our love die fast
i never knew bout that
i saw it all turn bad
now i don’t want you back

woke up and my mind is spinning
woke up and the whole world’s ending
still searching to feel something
still feeling like i’m nothing

(harvest)
you don’t even know what happened
I don’t want to fix it all
seeing through our glass it’s cracking 
hourglass, not filled at all

ill never know your passions
cause we’re in a late stage, we’re in a late stage 
i’m breaking down i’m crashing
not on the same page, not on the same page

i want you to be here, a main stay 
one day I wanna play on the main stage 
it’s just the same shit, said a different way
I’ll cough it up, I’m feeling grey 

i want to be in the nosebleed, know me, everything is better when you hold me
or scold me
im slowly 
finding somewhere to hide like brody

knowing that you’ll never know me gives me piece of mind 
i hope you know im lonely like all of the time

i start to realise that I won’t come to my senses
I hope when I leave this place I go on to the next thing

never knew feat. hamilton (prod. memoryrose, toofargone, homesick & harvest)

produced by sleepwater and leftquiet

we're all trapped in hell
cant contain it no more
im up in decibals
explaining alot, shut up u act like fool
i hate you i really i do
i go up in decibals
oh wait heres a pause i know
study my flaws you whore
i guess im sad bitch
that doesent mean im emo
i fell in love with you
thats not a thing anymore
you catch me chilling
i go up in decibels

GUESS IM PUTTING ALL INTO MY SONGS SO U LISTEN
TANKING BULLET HOLES EVERYDAY INSIDE MY PRISON
WHEN SHE LEFT SHE SAID AM I GONNA KMS 
THINK THAT I MIGHT END IT

baby dont go
happy at home
she thinks im happy she dont know
i would kill you gladly she turn ghost
i fucking need you badly you dont know
berry in my medly with bloodflow
try your best forget me i wont go
im someone who you envy, i switch flows
im fresher than some dead, ill grab a rose
im sitting in the backseat, when she awoke

I DONT WANNA USE YOU JUST DO IT YOURSELF
YOU CAN DRAG ME DOWN TOO BUT ILL FIND MY WAY OUT
i pump inside her mouth
travels down her throat
BABY DONT MAKE A SOUND
bitch she like grope
i bend her snap her spine
ill put you in a choke
ILL FUCK YOU IN THE PINE

everystep i take
doesent seem to stop my aches
twist it round and pull her face
do it now remove all grace
turn it down your ears might break
IVE GONE UP IN DECIBELS

decibel

single off of my debut album "home away from home" (track 5)
shoutout to @xona for featuring on the track :)
produced by: azure & aidanhan
special shoutouts to @bitekivibes for being the goat too

LYRICS:
murph:

i walk out in the forest
but quickly i lose the light 
and my skin turns to mould
and the birds start to fly
i thought that i was safe, in my home away from home
but as i saw the creatures running i simply do not know

s.o.s, please save our souls
i might not make it back, barricade the door
s.o.s, please save our souls
frostbite all over me im stuck out in the cold

and now you're looking at me must've came back as a ghost
i love the way there's blood splattered all over the walls
can we find a way to give me pain, 'cause i need me some more
she put diamonds on her pinky ring, i love it when she flaunts

s.o.s, please save our souls
i might not make it back, barricade the door
s.o.s, please save our souls
frostbite all over me im stuck out in the cold

xona:

i'll decide what i do now - i'm reeling in "ours"
uh, leaving the pits that i found myself
(myself)
you desired my help
but i'm sick of words when its just pure guilt
so it's on me, awfully killing my health
i'm sorry i reached this point myself
the story goes on, to build a home
where we stay safe from the cold

murph:

s.o.s, please save our souls
i might not make it back, barricade the door
s.o.s, please save our souls
frostbite all over me im stuck out in the cold
(s.o.s)
s.o.s, please save our souls
i might not make it back, barricade the door
s.o.s, please save our souls
frostbite all over me im stuck out in the cold

- if u reached the bottom have a good day/night 333+ -

s.o.s w/ xona

i want you to see me like i'm nothing more than flesh 

w/ @heylog

prod: https://soundcloud.com/eric-godlow
master: https://soundcloud.com/ezraspandora 

looking back baby,
i already was hollow
toss it back 
way too fast 
till i get through the bottle
i don't wanna leave this club
i just wanna drink 
until i throw it all up
(lock me up)
want you to squeeze until i'm leaking out blood
i wanna see just how it feels to go numb
i wanna feel it on the tip of my tongue
let's fuck it up until we're going out bad 
let's break it all apart until there's nothing fucking left
cause i want you to see me like i'm nothing more than flesh 
and i want you to tell me i'm a waste of fucking breath
oh i'm terrible 
i'm the reason you're falling 
unbearable 
i'm the bones in your closet
i still just wanna see you get out 
there's nothing left for me to be now

damn it all 
pray for what 
there's nobody there
(i'm too far gone)
tell me why 
i wanted you then 
i want you now

heylog:
i'm chillin at a party, why'd i decide to go out
wish i just stayed home but i been stuck inside my house
i don't even care, i'd much rather be sober
she hung around the bottles and i could tell it broke her
i'm glad i can't relate cause i've never had that problem
you told me i'm rude for that but hey, i'm being honest
i would never lie to you, just want you to stop it
i could up and go, i've got plenty of options
quit talking, ur just holding me back
it's safe to say, tonight ur getting trashed
take a second to breathe, ik ur sad
you don't have to drink it away, could you relax
she phones her girls for a ride at 3am
can't even walk to her room, she needs a hand
throwing up all the time, she's used to it
friday night rolls around and repeat it

tip of my tongue (w/ heylog) (prod. eric godlow)

i'm not gonna bother you ever again

@heylog

heylog - repeat (nevrfall remix)

- ｇｕｅｓｓ ｉ'ｌｌ ｅｎｄｕｒｅ -
prod. kais
i love you guys<3 

lyrics:
where do i go from here
hm..
i miss my friends
im sick and insecure
hm..
guess i'll endure
guess things will never be how they were, no
and i'm not sure about anything anymore

i love you, i love you, i do
i'd hug you but my touch just goes right through
i told you, i told you i'm
gone, gone, gone.

where do i go from here
hm..
i miss my friends
im sick and insecure
hm..
guess i'll endure
guess things will never be how they were, nah
and i'm not sure about anything anymore

endure

original by https://soundcloud.com/greenwood2000

she does what you never did
you don't know how hard it is
to wake up alone
if it's over it's funny it still makes you cold
when you know

that you couldn't step away
in hopes that a memory
of something you need, would ignite from the first thing
that i thought was real but it's not

and i said i'd wait for you
in silence and in solitude
if it can't get better
there's darkness ahead
but it's safer together
i'm gone

shake at the thought of you
i still think a lot of you
of things that you said
feel at home with the worst things i keep for myself

and the life you were dealt's not a thing that you wanted
and i wasn't either and you made it obvious
so i don't trust a fucking thing
the nicest face could do the same
i think about it everyday
i wish i never let you in

make it quick i'm still here waiting
lost my mind way back in Salem
all at once you've only been all i want

and the life you were dealt's not a thing that you wanted
and i wasn't either and you made it obvious
wait for the day that your body decays
just to hear that they love you
cause they never will

snow cabin (greenwood cover)

i know it feels good when you hate my guts

https://soundcloud.com/vito2300
prod: https://soundcloud.com/prodcxrter  https://soundcloud.com/yunnygoldz

i can't feel my skin
and it's numbing 
god you make me sick 
when you touch me
blood drip down my lip 
like you're wanting 
tear drop down my chin
baby i can't run 
baby i still would 
do i make you blush?
god i know it feels good 
when you hate my guts
baby i still could 
even now, just us
god you know that you should 
till you've had enough

off this bottle 
got me swerving, i'm sedated my,
heartbeat so slow i can't pace it i,
gave up, crush crush till it make me right
i'm the only one you keep awake at night
faster, hands over my body going faster
laughter, he don't feel attached like an actor
backwards, every fucking night i'm moving backwards
everything i ever felt it didn't matter

i don't wanna go like this 
but it's coming
the bruise still stains my wrist from the cuffing
i can't feel my skin 
god you make me sick,
you made me 

(vito:)
Do you want me
I can’t even tell anymore
Your words haunting
Mellowing the pain i endure
A closed chapter
I keep looking backwards
My body’s tattered
Forever and after

But you wanted this so bad
That I don’t think you thought about it
Lay down through the pain
Say what’s good about it
You could love me in ways
I can’t live without it

you make me sick

La, La, La, Love

Jackson Chatman (FUN MUSIC 2024 Remake) music is House Version, but these songs lean a bit more on the alternative side. Lots of fun and enjoyable for maybe a car ride or country dance.

Jackson Chatman Site

A Battlefield of Love

a bystander

LP3 out now everywhere <3

@signett001
@butaneband

hiraeth (feat. onlyfriend) [linden]

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