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Life Of Crime Lil boosie

Multi-Millionaire Adult Entertainer Hugh Hefner faces against Children's Entertainer Pee-wee Herman in our newest rap battle.

TewZen as Hugh Hefner
Mat4yo as Pee-wee Herman

LYRICS:
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES
HUGH HEFNER
VS
PEEWEE HERMAN
BEGIN!

Hugh Hefner:
The difference between Playboy and Playhouse is simple
You took my title and stuck a “with” in the middle
I’ll have to riddle ‘gainst a little kid who didn’t take his Ritalin
and giggles like his nipples got twisted but thinks it’s tickling
Wishing Miss Yvonne would kiss you “right where it hurts, ma’am”
But with that Pee-Wee, you’ll never be Her Man
Your Rising Action Climaxed in the previews
when Peewee was “cumming in theaters near you”

Peewee Herman:
HAHA, a bunny suits you well
the way you hop around town playing show and tell!
Making beds rock out of wedlock of the law,
I don’t know how you keep it up with that pin above your balls!
‘Cause your pals are only palimonies, after you’re deceased
You’ll be a veteran remembered as an Editor in Chief!
You’re a Crooked Man and I’m gonna subscribe you to the Bible
and override your Bi-cycle with my bicycle!

Hugh Hefner:
You’re schizophrenic mess who’s poisoning a generation
Try and gaze at my mansion while you’re enslaved in your basement
‘Cause you’re a nerd hippie, I’m a strapping geriatric gladiator
and i’ll have you running like a fidgety refrigerator
Crank all the prank calls you think won’t tank
‘till you underpay the interest accrued in your Spank Bank
You think you’re forgotten from watching me lay it down?
No, I just had more “versatile” toys in my playhouse

Peewee Herman:
Not ONE good joke! Guess you can’t Stand Up!
Plus, you might “stop motion” if your heart rate goes nuts!
I know the mind of a child and I’ll use it to crack your code
and add some 49 more shades of red to your bathrobe!
with a tip of the hat I’ll be tipping your boat
if you’re joking, I’ll be literally coming at your throat
now we both play with plastic toys but why?
I know you are, butt! What am I?
it’s sad your form of literature is Otherkins on Calendars.
You’re no entrepreneur, your category is Amateur!
I’ll force you in your drawer in the morgue with those loose screws
‘cause we all scream when we see you as if the secret word was HUGH!


Hugh Hefner vs Pee-wee Herman

Deadpool - Seth W
Deathstroke - HyperJacob96

Deadpool (0:12):
Okay, let me bring this up, ‘cause that’s just lame
You guys couldn’t even follow the fucking channel name?
Anyways, let’s not sweat it on the small stuff
as it looks like this bitch is back for a second round of beat up!
But I’m not only bettin’, you’ll be regrettin'
harder than the viewers after Seth’s Orochimaru impression
Hot like a chimichanga, I'll tango if you wanna
And I'll be laughing when you're on the end of my katanas
Man, I'm a legend, you've been left in the dust 
It's kinda sad people only know you vaguely from Injustice
You’re the best Assassin? Well, let me be enlightened
‘Cause in five whole seasons you couldn’t beat the Teen Titans

Deathstroke (0:44):
One mediocre verse, and I’ve had it with this red fool
But I’m about to leave you like Gatsby: dead pool
I’ll hand your ass to ya, you know I’m not a fan of ya
Exile your existence, blast your act back to Canada
You’re not better, you didn’t come before me
You stole all my shit then just jacked up the horny
And you think you rap hard? I’ll show you some violence
I preferred you in Origins: where you were silent
Cursing like a sailor, making jokes about your ween
Congratulations, you’re a hero to every pre-teen
I’m not sure what’s bigger: your ego or your mouth
But I’m sure it won’t take much to stomp this Merc out

Deadpool (1:16):
Maybe you came first, but Super Soldier gone crazed?
That concept and your rhymes are drier than my fucking face!
You’re not relevant anymore, you know what that means?
We’ll never have to suffer your ass on the big screen!
I beat you in a Death Battle, why don’t you check reality?
I'm just fighting for the plot, but you’ve no personalities!
This upcoming filler's like your persona, boring and futile
Leave this  audience saying, “aw man, that was BRUTAL”

Deathstroke (1:37):
Here’s a problem with you, you don’t know when jokes get old
‘cause that verse had as dull of an effect as Ryan Reynolds
So when you think you’re all superior,  you haven’t got a clue
I wish my wife had killed me - I wouldn’t have inspired you!
Drop the anti-hero bullshit, I'm a straight up villain
This track’s not the only thing I'm wicked at killin’
Now it's time Wade Wilson found a new mission
Before you regret the colour of pants you’ve chosen to shit in.

WHO WON?
WHO’S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE COMIC BOOK FANS!
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF COMIC BOOKS!

Written by: Seth, Dusk, MaNCHA, & Joey

Deadpool VS Deathstroke II - CBRB Vol. 2 Issue 1

Kingpin: Stofferex
Penguin: Seth W

Kingpin:
Check your ornithology, Penguins have never been fly
But test me and one Will, son, hit your Lounge with a Bullseye!
Fuck Ramsay, I’ve got the hardest verbal abuse in Hell's Kitchen
So squawk all you want birdie, you can’t spit like Fisk can
Enforcers, Skulls, Diablos, one bad move I’ll take you out
Drop you back into the lake, dames I take have always drowned
Unlike your goony clowns, I’m hard as a diamond, tough mudder 
Not even the Human Torch could singe the muscle on the blubber
The mind behind the mechanics, the guy who calls the shots
against a slimy bitch who cries and fits till he gets what he wants
But that nose is all you flaunt, and it’s no secret you see
Penguin’s only pissed because his other pecker is petite!

Penguin:
Now Wilson, really I don’t mean to be an accuser
You want celebrity status? Sign up for Biggest Loser!
You’ll see that stepping to this fella may not be so hella
if you edge another feather towards my umbrella!
So I’m the prey like a penguin? I’ll club you like a seal!
Take you to my freezer and GUT you. Oh, the squeals!
Bullied as a child and you’re still crying unfair
I’ll show you how to improve your city! Oswald for Mayor!
Foiled by a blind man, your career’s not in crime!
So peck off, Cobblepot has got the proper rhymes! 
Showing Gotham a whopper of hostility, I’m unstoppable
This prick being stronger than my monocle’s improbable!

Kingpin:
Fat? I’m three hundred and fifty pounds of muscle!
Got the Pres in my pocket ‘cause I know how to hustle!
You’ve barely got a burrough but I run half this country
I fought the Devil to a standstill, you can’t even touch me!
Your mom’s the only person in the world who ever wanted you
Fucked in the head from the past that’s always haunted you
The one thing that sticks out more than the nose on this bitch?
You’re such a harmless Napoleon you have to murder kids.

Penguin:
If you’re threatening to kill me, then better get busy
That’s been your worst line since “Wilson Fisk is in the hizzy!”
Check Pain and Prejudice and you’ll see no more Mr Nice Bird!
Screw DiCaprio, YOU’RE being sunk by an Iceberg!
Your whole crew are traitors, numbskulls or spineless turds
But still the fat Mr. Clean hires the likes of Turk!
I’m high class, stick to the ghetto, cause you can betchya
I’ve buried your career alive, just like Vanessa

Written by Seth, Dusk, B-Lo, thelegion

Penguin VS Kingpin - CBRB Vol. 2 Issue 4

Mancha as Bill Cipher (+ Nightmare, Mettaton, Rumplestiltskin, and Steven Universe Cameos)
Fle as Nyarlathotep
Rattlebones Cosplay as Johnny Bravo 

Based off of this production by the RIT Cosplay Troupe! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DGHpsbfG3gY

Bill:
I strive to be your angle and your devil in this play
But you ask who’s been more played and I can’t Megami Ten-say!
Fall back to your void, Yu-goth, and retrace your Nyarlatho-steps!
As I spit nigh indecipherable rhymes to leave you plain perplexed
{I’m the Soul Edgiest of shapes! There’s no way you can harm me}
[Wait, is this from Cosplay Chess?] {It’s For the Fans, darling!
So let’s make a deal lest you just} become another meme!
Cliche, I know, but you’re only going to win this in your dreams!

Nyarlathotep:
Bravo, William, you got your pawns to fight for you
But a decent verse from you’s harder to find than E2
I come Ahtu, shoulda Shugo-ran, but I guess that you’re not scared
Non-Euclidean geometry? More like a Hollywood Square!
So take a look at this triangle, tryin’a be illumi-naughty
Things fall apart, the universe can’t hold my second coming!
You can’t UNDO your failures! You’re naught but a polter-Geist!
The only Fearamid scheme that is decent is your sacrifice!

Bill:
Wait, we only get one verse so he can use me as a doormat?
Screw this! I’m Weirdmageddin’ sick of the  Battle Bytes format!
In every universe I’m prime! But you? I might split my sides!
Nyarly, I’m pretty sure you’re only known as an an old guy!

Nyarlathotep:
Stop! You know I don’t play phar-aoh, don’t cross this Faceless God
Kneel to the Crawling Chaos! Suck my Necronomicock!
Outrap this Oregon bore again? Please, I do that in my sleep.
I have a thousand forms and more to make a isosceles weep!

Bill:
Oh come on, get to the point, you flowery eldritch fop
Or go back to your anime girl form! Let the weeaboos jerk off!
You’ll see the light of day when I illuminate this heathen
Because I’m taking this victory, your life, [AND STEVEN!]

Nyarlathotep:
So Dimentio can help me to leave this Flatlander plastered
Looking forward, this is more pathetic than your bout with Gaster
Vote on your screens now, but I fear ratings just might disappoint!
Even I can’t give a ten to the being known for his three points!

Battle Bytes

Bill Cipher vs Nyarlathotep. Battle Bytes #11

Scarecrow: WoodenHornets
Mysterio: Stofferex

Scarecrow:
Can't work your mundane effects when the mic is what I’m rockin’
You're at my Beck and call, Quentin, when I drop rhymes like fear toxin
You're in for A Long Halloween, I'll be turning you into a Crimson Mist!
Hell, you're barely sinister, I bring torture to all amidst
You're better off the stage, so go back to behind the scenes
With a costume that popped up straight from MTV
Using smoke and mirrors? Cheapest fear tactic of all!
To stop this Crystal Ball? I’ll give Valentino a call!
My schemes are sinister, where you must just be crazy
‘Cause the fact a walking fishbowl challenged Spider-Man’s amazing!
Your illusion of victory’ll be your biggest humiliation,
So know that when this is over, you’ll meet… your oblivion

Mysterio (1:01):
Having thoughts of winning? My hypnosis has you dreaming
I'm bringing rain on this Scarecrow gassed higher than the ceiling
I have no phobia of those things on your fingers. There's no “clause”
I’ve seen smarter and spookier scarecrows in the land of Oz!
There is no foretelling what Mysterio will bring
As I’m gonna steal this rap like Luthor did to your ring
But why would Sinestro want to choose this strawed slacker
Whose visions are less scary than the ones on Fear Factor?
Head back to your infamy, I’ll always be remembered
Wouldn’t want to leave this Jack’o Spitting crap December’d!
For you’ll always be outshadowed when it comes to villainy
You'll be forgotten like your role in The Dark Knight Trilogy

Scarecrow:
I tore Gotham apart and left the city in shambles
While reboots left you scrapped with your role from Bruce Campbell
I’m deadly enough to be in the The Legion of Doom
while your only superpowers have the same effect as shrooms
Too bad you weren’t smart enough to psyche out your opponent,
And acting out your brain-dead suicide was your most batty moment!
Now I've flipped the tables on you, a dramatic reversion
You know you’re lame when a LEGO is your most popular version

Mysterio:
Your name fits, ‘cause you’ve surely got a stick up your ass
Despite all your crowing on, all the gas you spit is crass
With all that chemical exposition, your whole life went to shit
And then to shut you up, someone put a yellow ring on it
Not even your own family cares about you, Doctor Crane
Maybe you’d know more emotions, if only you had a brain
While your gimmicks have a cost, the pain I’ve caused is priceless
Leave you like a real scarecrow - In a field, lifeless

Written by: Seth W, FoolMeNever, Dragonsblood23, Nick Sucks at Games, Ryan Tillotson, Iamthelegion

Scarecrow VS Mysterio - CBRB Vol. 2 Issue 6

Patron battle funded by Kubby!

HyperJacob96 as Voltorb
Freshy Kanal as Polandball
Mancha as Pokedex

Voltorb:
I’m about to Discharge, spit sparks, and go wild!
An electric menace shocks Lithuania’s bastard child!
Need the net to Know Your Meme, I’m iconic anyday
Check the dex and see that I’m number one hundred, okay 
This MS Paint disgrace wants to rip off Hetalia’s crown
I’m a real Premier Baller when flipped upside down
If he lashes at me like Hungary, I won’t be having it
[Voltorb’s Static]! Poland can into paralysis!

Polandball:
Head back to Vermillion! You’re trashier than your gym!
Always so unstable you could blow up on a whim!
You’re uniconic! Even Genwunners forgot your face
So even Poland can diss into waste of space!
You’re Ground-ed, pokeball can’t compare to my comic!
Your evolution’s so useless it’s just a half-assed backflip!
And for all the trainers out there, here’s a tip when you explore
Keep a irritating sphere forsaken on the hideout’s floor

Voltorb vs Polandball. Battle Bytes #17

Reuploading the old ARB's! The first really good one

In this ARB, we have the world's top detective, L, going up against the forced investigator and lucky student of Hope's Peak Academy, Makoto Naegi, squaring off in a battle of the greatest case-solvers in a context of death.

Lyrics :

L: 
Students, take a seat. This outta be a crushing execution :
To take the cake I'll break this head without hesitation
Observin’ Naegi, Ultimate Nobody, probably Kira
Pulling the trigger myself, no other in the game spits iller
Amateur ! take your leetspeak back in the playground
Step into the big leagues, like Fukawa, you’ll fall down
In you, I see 1% of guts, 99% of piss,
So try to diss and way more than your life will be at risk

Naegi:
*shot fired* You got that wrong ! My hope for the future’s strong !
So sing along, boring monotone, as I tune up your song !
My punchlines hit so fast, your heart will stop, be careful,
Or the top detective’s gonna lose again to High-School level !
I distrust a lusty butt toucher, kinky for handcuffs, disgusting !
Sadistic fuck filthier than Kira, let's just bust him !
You're grounded so answer me before this gets lamer,
Which task force here actually catched a serial killer ?

L, Mello and Near:
Ooh, shots fired, loser ! What's scary in a fashion queen ?
Raps that’s more crap than your animation, go back to your PSP screen,
Cause with chocolate-sweet flow L's legacy will take you outta the picture,
Close this case and your school, blast you away like its headmaster!
Wanna take me down, little girl? don't hope too much
You'll need a deus ex machina to get this legend touched!
But you'll die out, like your daddy, your mommy, your best friends,
And the whole world of which you're delaying the end !
This world, we change it ! You just bother with your clothes...
Jerking off to a dead girl before playing the Ace Attorney clone?
Just one mistake, you'll lose, cuz your talents were kidnapped,
Watari, we're off, we've left marks this kid won't ever forget.

Naegi, Kyoko and Togami:
Autistic orphan trash, if you leave, for God's sake, take a shower...
Yeah, you’ve blown it, burnt yourselves, so competing ? Don't bother...
Get your clones together, use your power to think, then you'll feel blue
When resourceless teens solve the puzzle to prove they're more valuable than you!
So here comes mankind's future ! Mutually killing it to reign supreme !
Clairvoyant ! At ease with flows ! We founded the perfect tag team !
A gift from above, so let’s rap ! The best weapon is in the end of this pen ! (achoo)
We've rung some bells, IT'S THE END OF THE LAST THREE PANDA-MEN !
"Gothic Batman", we don't need your name, after we've flowed,
Monokuma’s gonna load you of your sweets till you explode !
And while we mourn the death of your crushed-down network,
Our footsteps on your grave is all that's left of your work!

Emo Owl as L
Dusk as Makoto Naegi
Frenzy as M
VinnyO as N
MetalFire as Byakuya Togami
Leannaire as Kyoko Kirigiri

L Vs Makoto Naegi - Anime Rap Battles #3

Lyrics/Karaoke/Trivia: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1XcpmalQ6a0QqSrsGP9SnPWtE4KqR2mRNYHb7Uyc80JU/edit
Illuminasium as Yuri
Malina Rose as Blake Belladonna
Written by MetaMachine, FxyFynn, Legengo, Kamren and GamingPlush64
Mixed by Freshy Kanal
Thumbnail by Legengo
Beat by Audio Network
Hint for ???: "Why so flammable?"

Blake Belladonna vs. Yuri

Lyrics: EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES!
JACK THE RIPPER!
VERSUS!
JEFF THE KILLER!
BEGIN!

Jack the Ripper
Dear Jeff, I keep on hearing that you think you can beat me
You're just a kid; I'm the greatest killer in all of history
I have laughed when you talk about putting me to rest
I'd mutilate you, but I've only killed people who've had sex!
Oh! Do you feel that burn, like vodka and bleach?
Now I'll let you join your family among the tortured and deceased
Break your Elizabeth stride when I snap your legs in half
Followed by your arms; it's a Double Event of my wrath!

Jeff the Killer
(evil giggle) You lied to me
You told me that you'd win, but unblinking I see
That you only killed five back in 1888
So it's time for Leather Apron to meet my lovely leather face!
Nobody knows who you are, can't even decide on a name
But who am I? I'm some guy achieving Internet fame
You won't be writing letters anymore once I'm released
I'll turn the R-I-P in Ripper into Rest In Peace!

Jack the Ripper
You're a Joker ripoff, right down to the smile
Went insane and left in flames on the bathroom floor tile
Nobody ever caught me; you're all bark and no bite
A creepypasta pedo hunting kids throughout the night!
While you're busy getting children, I'm sticking my blade in women
I'll drink your blood like ginger beer before it has time to thicken
They call me Saucy Jacky, I'm sure to be the winner
So good luck defeating me; yours truly, Jack the Ripper!

Jeff the Killer
You're one to talk about ripoffs; you've spawned millions
And yet nobody could prove that you even exist
You're a hoax; a British media publicity stunt
Your knife's so nice and sharp, but I'll be cruel and blunt!
Want to come to a party? It'll be so fun
Whether at the bus stop or backyard, I'll have this battle won
I'm the white hoodie From Hell, here to make you weep
Now lie back, relax...and go to sleep...

WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP BATTLE PARODIES!

Jack the Ripper vs Jeff the Killer. Epic Rap Battle Parodies 12

Epic Rap Battle Parodies