you wrote "don't forget" on your arm

For Giving

you're on the phone 
with someone who doesn't know 
about your soul and how it 
can't be held by flesh and bone 
and i guess that's fine 
i would never want you to 
stop your life 
but when i saw you both 
with your shoulders touching 
sitting so close 

i knew i'd hold on to this feeling 
i'd hold on to anything at all 
was it my fault 
because i easily confused you 
for someone who would hold my hand 
when things got hard 
when things got dark 
because oh my god 
when they get dark 
they get so dark 

you were always a shitty friend 
and you would leave when i got sick 
you never called me on my birthday 
i want to call you on your birthday 
so i'll hold on to this feeling 
i'll hold on to this hate 
for as long as i need 
for it to help me

learning to hate you as a self defense mechanism

https://ifidieinmississippi.bandcamp.com/album/sweetheart

the last time i saw you

your bones brittle and
your skin covered in marks
control everything
cause i wanna take my time
you're my favorite
person to talk to when i wanna die
when im high with you
all i wanna do is kiss you
sober dreaming
isnt what im feeling now
now things are different
they're always changing when you get so bored
this is the last time
ill think of wanting to call you mine
ill wait for nothing
while you wait for me to come around
he'll change his mind
like every time he did before

pic by rob
http://oldcondom.tumblr.com/

u made me so tired

smoked so much till i could feel something
the cold resided i'm erupting
cleared the dew as a drip to the ground 

take my heart and twist my tongue
rip my teeth out one by one 
squeeze my arms so i don't feel so numb

did you know i'm not great at communication, i sit alone but my mind's abrasion wears me down

did you know, i'm too scared if scaring you off so i'll just leave

being dead is still better than being me (demo)

lately i've been feeling tired of everyone i know

support @wishing-music
https://wishing.bandcamp.com/track/emptiness-is-a-closet-full-of-your-old-clothes

when everything feels empty, i rely on empty touch 
to ignore the days that i hate myself and i miss you too much 
and everyone feels cold when they lack something familiar 
there was light trapped where the sun was 
this is harder than i thought 

i will always look for you in the quiet empty nothing 
where you were convinced there was only dark and the sharpest objects 
i saw your coat. i saw it like a martyr sees its body 
i saw your coat like the shadow of a ghost that wouldn't leave here 
i saw your coat hanging in surrender like a white flag 
i saw your coat and i hate this 

this is harder than i thought

To Forget

wishing - emptiness is a closet full of your old clothes

where did you go, and what did you do
with all the time you were too scared to move
and what is it like to be by yourself
for three and a half years
for roughly three and a half years
if we could just pretend that i went to college
and that is why you, you haven’t seen me
i wanted to go, but not for this long
i over did it
why did you say that i was one in a million
because i believed it i thought i had something
that you were too scared to lose
so if we could just pretend that i went to college
or traveled abroad and did something different
anything but just sitting at home
for three and a half years
writing song after song after song
so what is it like to be by yourself
and not feel like you’ll die
around everyone else
i thought i was one in a million
well thanks for nothing
yeah thank you
thank you 

if we could just pretend

(Scruffpuppie) i hate that you're happy - tiny little houses cover

new years kiss

i record songs and write poems and i really hope you're having a good day.

you wrote "don't forget" on your arm

flatsound