guitar by oc <3

lyrics:
gotta hide away 
i don’t wanna see my face
i don’t wanna know what i look like
running from my self
but she’s never not far behind 
i hate who i am now 
havent left this room in days 
bet everyone else has forgotten my face 
can’t continue on like this 
so i hide away 
not like you’d notice anyway 
so i hide away
i dont wanna see my face 
i dont wanna know what i look like 
running from myself but shes never not far behind 
never not far behide 
how do i get away from this place 
scars all over my surface

hide

lyrics -
hard to think there's no way, incredible
you had him take my place
then one of you
tried to drag my name so i wanna know
what part u had to play cos' i'm sick of u

and it's funny cos' i think you've gone and lost it
got your hand on the button saying 'watch this'
and my hand's under the table as i hear you
staring as i came into the room but i don't see you

why you gotta act like that?
waste my serotonin like that
baby fix ur attitude
why you gotta do me like that?
why you gotta act like that?
waste my serotonin like that
baby fix ur attitude
why you gotta do me like that?

S.O.S i caved
but i'm still alive barely
tried to beat the struggle but got lost along the way
went too far alone, no rest 
and took it on myself to prove the dark would coat the day
hard to show love most days
no compassion from my friends
but i love that i pulled through
never know for certain
but i'm glad that i'll be home soon

scared to death of life i'll
battle through the pain and kick it off so
don't you ever worry i'm okay, love
cos' i don't really care no not at all though
stick a sword straight through me, watch me bleed out
i won't say a word i'll make you feel that
this moment that we're in will never end
a new life for us will grow
begin

freeze baby, put your hands to your head
'this is love?' she said
i don't get this or the conversation
i ain't good with stress
i can't clean the mess you left
great now it's complicated
just put the gun away, love
there's no time to fight me, we'll figure you out
take my hand and slowly we'll figure this out

i could steal my heart right back
give me fuckin credit cos' i'm loving all that
trauma that you're giving when you're thinking too fast
take another pill i'm sure it'll slow u down

~ fear

prod by stezzyxl 
enjoy^\^

lyrics:
cover all my face with hair all over my eyes
i’m not confident, i bet u cannot recognize 
i’m invisible to everybody’s naked eyes
i don’t know what i’m doing here and i don’t know why
and tears fall like the rain in the night sky
her voice lingers in head like a lullaby
i’ll try to get over u when the time is right
but i’m not ready, so i’ll hold onto that goodbye 

i don’t know what i should say
i don’t know what i should do
i gotta reroute 
i gotta avoid that avenue
(x4)

ur a liar from ur heart
should’ve known from the start
(x2)

avenue

sinxi x yung van - I promise I don't care at all

Out on Spotify
@sinxi <3 
Self Prod 

Lyrics 

If you want to lie, tell me that you lie for me
If you want to cry, tell me something nice to me
Numb these feelings that you never learn to miss
I know feelings turn to shit, in this way that we stay up

Break up Break up
On our way out
Take us, take love don't erase us
I don't need nobody else
Left up in my head
Everything you said
I don't need nobody vacant
Tell me something when you say nothing
And these feelings that we left
I don't want regrets
I just want to feel things that we never left

I need someone in my mind that's going to love me back
I need someone on decline that's going to wait for that
Everything you ever say
You don't need no wedding ring
You change seasons in a day
You look at me you say
Wake up, took the day drugs
Love you till you speak to Satan
Then you break up
Tell me lies longer than acres
will break curse
On this leave your feeling vacant
So vacant, guess I got to leave

(Sinxi)
What you saying to me
Think you better calm it down
I just said I was on my way
Irritated by the words you say
And it ain't going to get any better
I been losing all sense of self
So it doesn't mean you don't recognise me
I been going for way too long
And I know that its so disheartening

Break up Break up
On our way out
Take us, take love don't erase us
I don't need nobody else
Left up in my head
Everything you said
I don't need nobody vacant
Tell me something when you say nothing
And these feelings that we left
I don't want regrets
I just want to feel things that we never left

CURSE (feat. Sinxi)

msitreated, misplaced
scars on my face
smoking so much lately
my teeth got yellow stains

no feelings, erased
hate how people change
bloody knuckles hit the wall
but life's still the same 

over you in my head
in my heart u still there
my body's a mess
feel u eating at my flesh 


feeding off of me
ur drinking what i bleed
acting like you love me 
then use me like a leach

how ain't u ashamed of ur-self~
keep on acting like ur the-best
i think u should just let me-rest
stop trynna find where my body-at

deep down, covered in dirt
x marks the spot i got hurt
under a tree, where the sun won't burn
is where i wrote this song

mistreated, misplaced
scars on my face
smoking so much lately
my teeth got yellow stains

no feelings, erased
hate how people change
bloody knuckles hit the wall
but life's still the same (2x)

mistreated, misplaced (caves)

lyrics:

I don't got lies to sell you
If you want I'll pretend to
Keep an eye out
For a daydream of a rescue
I don't know what to tell you
Maybe I'll just forget to
Keep a cover up
On the things I never meant to

I don't got truths to sell you
If you want I'll pretend to
Keep a blindfold on
For a nightmare of a rescue
Never know what to tell you
Maybe I'll just forget to
Keep it all away
Say the things I never meant to

What am I supposed to send
Letters all wrapped in red
A ribbon or two or ten
For anything to make sense at all
Every single thing I said
It's gift-wrapped in my head
All paired up with some greeting cards
I scribbled in my bed

So there’s a ransom for a promise that I'd never hear
Burn it down and build it up for another year
If I take my pictures down will I disappear
That's really what you gotta hear, that's really what you got

I don't got lies to sell you
If you want I'll pretend to
Keep an eye out
For a daydream of a rescue
I don't know what to tell you
Maybe I'll just forget to
Keep a cover up
On the things I never meant to

I don't got truths to sell you
If you want I'll pretend to
Keep a blindfold on
For a nightmare of a rescue
Never know what to tell you
Maybe I'll just forget to
Keep it all away
Say the things I never meant to

Hear me out
I'm not a saviour anymore
I keep on melting through the floor so I can't
Stay around
Let me just get my shining armor
And go ride off on my horse

That's what you wanted right
A daydream of a rescue
What you wanted right
A fairytale to run away to
What you wanted right
That’s what you wanted right

SPOTIFY + APPLE

rescue

should have 
should have been my body
should have 
should have been my body

ill never get another chance now
and i dont want it, i just want you back now
i cannot deal with all these faces looking at me
i really think it should have been my body

ive been lost now for a while and i need some help
but none of my friends even seem to care
throw me on the ground while youre walking out
say its all because of me you know its not fair

have so much to tell you bout my come down
its not funny its not funny im still bleeding
how much do i need for me to pass out
if im gone before the morning then i need it

i really thought i tried my best
im putting all my scent across your messsages
just to ruin it again
youre my love and all my medicine

whats stopping me
nobody can stop me now
what is happening 
words barely leaving my mouth
but im lost again
gaps of air barely creep out
im asleep again
i dont mean to let you down

ive been lost now for a while and i need some help
but none of my friends even seem to care
throw me on the ground while youre walking out
say its all because of me you know its not fair

have so much to tell you bout my come down
its not funny its not funny im still bleeding
how much do i need for me to pass out
if im gone before the morning then i need it

should have
should have been my body...

body

i dont really like where youre pulling me now
i thought id do better, but youre barely proud
i dont really like that youre not calming me down
ive got nowhere to run now
nowhere to go now

you thought its best for me
but i dont need anything but you now
i did whats best for me 
and honestly i need you right here in my house
cant let this run on much further
further ill fall down
dont know how much i can cope fore' i hit you and fall back down

on the pavement 
on the pavement

pavement

prod by stezzyxl
enjoy

lyrics:

whenever you sleep
can you picture urself right next to me?
whenever you breathe
does my scent give u a sense of relief?

or maybe i’m wrong
or please tell me i’m right
or maybe i’m wrong
or maybe i’m stupid for making this song
about loosing

my love
she broke my trust
and now i can’t feel
nothing feels real
i’m growing numb
why did i choose you
oh if i knew
that you would’ve left
i would’ve held u one last time again

my mind just likes to imagine
if we stayed together tell what would happened?
cuz i’m not too sure
if we would’ve worked
maybe our love is disguised as a curse 
maybe it was all just doomed from the start
she loves me
she loves me not
loves me 
she loves me not
picking the pedals is all i have got
under the moon with no people involved

or maybe i’m wrong
or please tell me i’m right
or maybe i’m wrong
or maybe i’m stupid for making this song
about loosing


my love
she broke my trust
and now i can’t feel
nothing feels real
i’m growing numb
why did i choose you
oh if i knew
that you would’ve left
i would’ve held u one last time again

scars

rip 🕊🙏
thank you for everything.

Lyrics:
I don't know how to start
Where do I begin 
Just a couple weeks ago 
We've been sitting on the couch
In your living room 
And you were telling stories but your youth
And you were telling me you're proud
About the things that I accomplished
About the path that I have chosen
About the job I work at  
And we've been always laughing
Working on some cars in your barn
Every other afternoon after school
I was spending all my time with you

And you teached me so much things
I am so damn grateful for everything you did for me
You've been there when I was down
And always had an open ear for the things I had to say 
A place to flee when I had struggles back at home
You never judged or talked down on me
You always asked me how I feel and what was going on
And I tried to help you where I could
Mowing lawn, cutting wood or just hanging around
Cause I know you had your own struggles
Even tho you never talked about it once
Fearing that someone could worry
But I felt something was wrong 
You started to forget so fast
And I could feel that you've ain't been yourself

You just stopped to eat, and you just stopped to drink 
And you just lost your smile, but you never ever wanted to go to the hospital
Then one call, blue lights and sirens in a dark night
I could see it from my window and that was the last time
That I ever saw you alive

I wish that I could talk to you one last time
So I could say goodbye
So I could say goodbye

I tried to shed a tear
But they ain't coming out
I'm feeling so damn cold
I'm feeling so damn numb
There's no sadness inside
Cause all of this ain't real
How can you be gone, nah that can't be real
So I just went over to your house
Thought that you'd be there sitting in your chair
But there was nobody
There was nobody
Just darkness

I just hope that you're in a better place now
And you don't have to feel the pain no more
Cancer rotted throughout your whole body
And ain't nobody had seen it coming
We gon' meet again
When I meet my end
When judgement day's coming

rescue

ghosthands

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