prod xona <3

@heylog

-lyrics-
oh I might try
to end myself and neglect my health and I don’t need one more-
reason to live, I don’t need a friend
I could care less :/
for her help and I don’t need no pills to keep me held
but I’ve tried 2much,  2much right now..
but I can lie and that’s alright (:
but all my friends
push me on edge
and they do not sense
on why I feel dead..
oh I might try
to end myself and neglect my health and I don’t need one more-
reason to live!
I don’t need a friend
I could care less :/
for her help and I don’t need no pills to keep me held

oh i might cry :,(
when this blade touches my skin
i don't need remorse
for all the sins that i commit
i don't need a friend
to tell me what i'm doing wrong
you think i don't know this
i could tell you the exact same thing
you better watch your back
i see the folks you call your friends will try hurt you
don't be surprised when it happens
cause i was surprised when it happened 
hating on myself
makes the 2 of us
no i don't need help
or any pill
the story of my life
i gotta chill
feel like pennywise
giving me a thrill

spotify

care w/ heylog♡

Cold breath running down my neck
Life been constant stress
Know that I'm a mess
No more tears are left now
Thought we had a chance
Said its for the best
Still I know that you'll be coming back around, coming back around
Still faded, been playing myself for too long
Narcissistic prick only listen to my own songs
Always bullshittin' swear that you would never do me wrong
Always lies, know I really wish that you would prove me wrong

Fool me once, it's okay know I've been thru this
Fool me twice and that trigger might get pulled man
Saying I'm the same as I once was, been a lost cause
No more speaking rip your jaw off
Fool me once, it's okay know I've been thru this
Fool me twice and that trigger might get pulled man
Saying I'm the same as I once was, been a lost cause
No more speaking rip your jaw off

I don't trust your boy know he lying every word
If any girl come near me, there's no option but to curve
Always laying low, only talking to myself
I'm starting to realize that this ain't good for my health
Lonely, met a new one
Is it too soon to say that I'm in love?
Hold me, physical touch
Surprised I got you, guess it was luck

Don't show my face oh please don't record
Don't let him in, promise me you'll ignore
Drowning my voice, don't care if it distorts
I want your love I need more I need more
You need to quit
Alcoholic
She hauling two beers and that's not attractive
But your so pretty on the outside
Hurting inside
Stay with me if you wanna walk a straight line

spotify link<3

lostcause w/ heylog (31sentinel)

produced by heylog

lyrics:
don't u ever talk about me or ur gonna get yourself hurt
i wake up and i'm winning, how does second feel when i'm first
my life might be lame but at least that i'm not lamer
i gotta get goin and i hope to see u never

i'm getting closer and closer
and closer
it's over
cause ima steer off if i keep losing composure
YOU'RE GETTING CLOSER AND CLOSER
AND CLOSER
IT'S OVER IT'S OVER
if u ever talk about me boy ur gonna get ur ego hurt
how does second feel when i'm consistently just placing first
maybe you'll reflect from your mistakes just how i have learned
we are not the same cause u are opposite of down to earth

i have fun, i don't need a beer
u talk and it goes out my ear
my hair smells like tobacco smoke
puff cigars, the bands maduro
she's wasted while i'm cookin heat
(damn son)
i can't talk i'm making a beat
can't text, i'm sweating down my chin
pump iron, bumping 2hollis

now don't you ever talk about me or ur gonna get urself hurt
wake up and i'm winning, how does second feel when i'm first
my life might be lame but at least that i'm not lamer
i gotta get going and i hope to see u never

maduro

produced by heylog

lyrics:
we went through a lot of ups and downs
yet you still stayed close to my side
we often dug straight to the ground
you don't know what i look like now
just a number in my phone
i'll love you the most
march is a horrible month
why's it always cold
spent the end to cry
i miss you every night
don't call me when you see this
i'll hit decline
i don't look the same
as i used to
is this a bad thing
log, i don't know you
i don't look the same
like before
and i don't recognize myself
anymore

2 weeks 'till i go home
can't wait to see you, oh
october is when you go
now things are coming to
an end

she'll only love me if i just love myself
but baby with you i felt things i don't feel
i couldn't imagine to feel someone else
the thought of it always gets me overwhelmed
i hate separating from people i love
but i go forever without anyone
i will go for days and not say any words
you won't hear from me cause i sit back and lurk
closing the drapes to block out any light
the things that i do i would never advise
it's so bad for me and hm, i wonder why
growing more acne and i'm not surprised
don't look at me, please don't look at my face
the way that you stare makes me humiliate
i swear i get uglier
i don't look the same
you won't recognize me by how much i've changed
changed

update failed

https://soundcloud.com/heylog

i run away out of fear and out of panic
i dissipate everybody who cause damage
i love it here
i think i can manage
i disappear into trees and into foliage
i walk a path, clear my head for my advantage
no one knows i'm here
no one knows i vanish

walking through mud, all the mire's climbing up my pants
water soaking through my jeans, why is it all swampy land
i'm so getting sick of this, take me to the flower field
i need to lay down and rest
sleeping would be ideal

love

vanish

SPOTIFY

heylog - vanish

guitars done by @prodjpjp
rest produced by heylog

lyrics:
starving now, it gets pretty bad
you saw it all get split in half
about every bridge has been collapsed
old friends of mine slowly detached
i think it's all my fault
questioning if i'm wrong
how do i make it stop
can't rest at all

one call was all i needed
right now, i feel completed
2019 is over
been four years and got lower
though, for me it stood out
bleed to just hear one sound
i'd die to hear that noise
the calmness of your voice
i knew how it'd turn out
soon you'd be leaving town
and i couldn't bare that thought
was hard to move on
32 degrees, lungs get colder by the second
been through hell and out
it's like there's some type of obsession
wondering the choice you made if you've ever regret it
if you gotta say something why don't you come confess it
everytime you mention how, i need to find me
don't know what ur tryna say
don't know what u mean
i think ur just saying words
you're just saying things
even you confuse yourself
you don't know what to think
the reason why i live is to hope for a day
to finally see guidance leading ur way
wonder how to start, wonder where i go
all of it requires leaving my home
been through a bit and so much has gone
you don't gotta be sorry if i went through a lot
i can see us starting a family
i think it's the only thing that'll help me

starving now, it gets pretty bad
you saw it all get split in half
about every bridge has been collapsed
old friends of mine slowly detached
i think it's all my fault
questioning if i'm wrong
how do i make it stop
can't rest at all
heart's pounding strong
been up for hours
the sun's almost up
like how do i do it
she say, "where you been"
no where
just haven't checked my phone to use it
it's all gone down in carnage
debris in my lungs
wake up, feel like garbage
and get my yeti cup
i'm obsessed, pop a can of caffeine
even 300mg can barely do a thing to me

carnage

'blinded by the sun' produced by heylog

lyrics:
you are every place i'm at, everywhere i look
what was it i said that made you this shook
i'm just telling the truth and you knew i would
don't interrupt me while i'm tryna cook
this is life
please don't cry
you're in tears
and you're worried i'm to fear
what was it i said that made you this way
everything we had now is down the drain
oh and god i don't feel the need to explain
when family asks about you i feel the pain
feel the pain

this ain't what i expected
i'm learning to accept it
it figures when i move on
you come back with aggression
who do you think u are
to appear whenever you want
do you think that's how this works
the situations now worse

𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦?

𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘰?

𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵?
𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘧𝘺𝘦𝘦 𝘦𝘦 𝘦 𝘦 𝘦𝘦𝘦𝘦𝘦 𝘦 𝘦 𝘦 𝘦  𝘦𝘦 𝘦 𝘦

why'd you make it worse than it had to be
only if u knew how i felt right then
when i see your name i barely can breathe
might as well just consider me a wretch

i hope i fall asleep and never wake
i always see u there and it feels safe
oh no please body don't u dare wake up
i'm in heaven and blinded by the sun

blinded by the sun

'12 gauge' produced by heylog

lyrics:
moving swift, moving clean
all my thrift big on me
and i look goofy when i see
order double in xl
when my body lean as hell
and it's all because i'm well
maybe i should get clothes
that i fit for my size
there are barely i own
jacket got holes in it
but ima still throw it on
cause i don't care if it's ripped
you'll never know
you'll never know
where she had went and where'd she go
i wanna leave
i wanna leave
i wonder what is stopping me
she loves borrowing my wardrobe
said i smell good, so you wear all of my clothes
and they come back smelling like her
next thing u know she has my whole attire

i'll wait 
till u make ur mind up
she wants 
everything i wear cause
all of 
it is oversized
the sleeves are 
well below her thighs
don't take 
every single thing i own
cause i'll 
need it back before u go
and she 
wonders why i said that
i'm not 
confident that this'll last

you ever think about where i been?
you ever think about who we was
cause i do
but i just pretend i don't care about us
she's always apologetic to me
but when did u ever do anything
cause i don't
i hope u will never forget about home

and she always tried on my clothes
i pretend and fake it all
what u don't know
oh, you don't know
keeping secrets way too long
and i cannot continue this
i'm struggling to exist
and u don't know
oh, you don't know
thoughts begin to overflow
you would ask for an extra large to wear
but i only have double x in there
oh but she'll wear anything that i give
so next time i'll come over with ur cares

shutting me down, wake up from rem
i had a dream of us both laying in bed
but when i woke up i thought that it was real
i tried to go back to sleep to get a feel
of what it was like again to see your eyes
i knew it was impossible if i tried
now i'm just laying here, eyelids open
i stare into darkness tryna see objects
the only thing i see is my closet ahead
the same one that bears a certain turtle neck
the same closet thats got my 'retta encaged
the same closet thats got my locked up 12 gauge
and here are these nights i spend alone
turn off the lights, open window
jump into bed, plug in my phone
when i still got 90% left to go
and i fall asleep, but before i do
i sit in silence for an hour or two
these vivid thoughts get into view
and this what it sound like when i dream of you

12 gauge

produced by logan

if you need me i wont be there
when you wake up, in front are stairs
have to hold back on what i want
i would love to be this blunt
save yourself
dont die in my arms
if word got out, youd be behind bars
save yourself
dont bleed in my arms
if you got out, youd be behind bars

i know something you dont know
i know i know i know i know
think im stupid? ive watched you close
im watchin watchin watchin been watchin
hows the weather over there
tell me why the fuck you scared

scared

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/3MyYxx8xvAuXSBjaWn3Ytx?si=gVcNjko9TNmK31A6EsnxLA
video: https://youtu.be/aSLd-sA_r8E?si=zJtO76JZEkzhwppL
amv: https://youtu.be/EFWBgiBOOsI?si=xGHMcNo8ZR7M7D4_

produced by heylog

i was looking at her eyes
i could tell she wanna die
wait, don't
i will be alone no
please don't go (please don't go) (please don't go)
please don't go (please don't go) (please don't go) (please don't go)
this is how it ends (this is how it ends)
i watch 'em all pretend (i watch 'em all pretend)
this is how it ends (this is how it ends)
drowning in our sins (drowning in our sins)
i was looking in her soul, she remind me of a ghoul
i think that she want me gone
come near me i'll bash your skull (bask your skull)
this is how it ends (this is how it ends)
i watch 'em all pretend (i watch 'em all pretend)
this is how it ends (this is how it ends)
drowning in our sins (drowning in our sins)

it's time to speed up
i am fed up with these people
go home
the world is falling off
i wanna go home
this ain't us
rewind
i wanna rewind back to you
beside
i wanna be beside close to you (close to you) (close to you)