Awesome! ... this music and the fact that you're back. Love : )

Love the beat and the whole vibe of this. Also very interesting to read the creative process.

Like Dreams - If You Are Allowed To

Work in progress

Caterpillar

When the medication kicks in and you just drift away. A moment of surpassing relief.

Annecy Mirror (calm)

“I like my songs raw, with the pulp and seeds. Those are nutrients. It’s not good to listen to too much highly processed music.”—Tom Waits

This is another one of those tunes that came about under the moon, on the back porch.

The Pulp and the Seeds

All of my songs can be divided into two categories, "songs for processing" and "bangers". THIS is a song for processing! I've been struggling for the past few weeks or so and normally when that happens, espescially with this type of stuff - the "consensus reality" stuff - it's very difficult for me to communicate my experiences, and more importantly, my inner landscape. 

I learned after my first bout of psychosis that I could process these emotions and concepts that I don't yet have words for by creating sonic representations. Like "painting my feelings" but with sound, so that's what I did here!  

I'm clinging tightly to my South Eastern practices and Alan Watts for grounding during times like these and I figured if I looped some helpful phrases, it would keep me focused. There's something about putting a beat behind some words that helps them stick better.

I've been managing both increased energy levels (but (mostly) still achieving 8 hours of sleep a night) and emotional lability (but religiously taking my meds) 

There's a certain....existential intensity that's overcoming me-BUT I know EXACTLY what to do for it! The care team is on watch for anything that MAY resemble psychotic symptoms and I have a handy little motto for managing times like these!

Stay Medicated. Stay Moving. Stay Musical~

Liminal Leaf - Feat. Alan Watts

More Signals

Had some fun writing a "break up" song. I asked my brother Vincent to work up the music and to produce it...he aced it!

Gone, Gone, Gone

Rege - You Remind Me

Chill Nu Jazz, a fusion of jazz, electro, and neoclassical music with throbbing hip hop beats at 85 bpm

The second of three songs including Ripples and yet to release, Harvest Moon, that I wrote between naps while I was in bed with a head cold. I literally fit the description of a bedroom producer 😆

Composed digitally MIDI to DAW via VST instruments, all original, no AI, made by a human

When the state of people of the world seems out of whack, I take comfort in Mother Nature’s equinox, a day when light and darkness are in balance. This year’s equinox occurs on a new moon, a rare event and a symbol for setting intentions for new life with gratitude for blessings already received.

For us living in the top half of the earth, we will see less light until the passage of Winter Solstice. For friends living in the lower half of the planet, may you enjoy the coming of the light until it fully blooms at Summer Solstice. Until then, on the equinox, 22 of September, 2025, we jointly experience an equality of night and day 🌚🌞

While Equinox presents us with equal day and night, the song definitely expresses my personal sadness at the reality of light fading into winter in my half of the world. The diminishing of light also reminds me of Dylan Thomas’ poem, Do Not Go Gentle into That Good Night, in which he wrote, “Rage, rage against the dying of the light.” So the music is truthful, and like all personal truths, this, too, will change. And can change as fast as a trip south of the sun-drenched Equator 😀✌️ 
…………………………………
85 bpm

Variations of the “heroic” key of Eb, and E, Ab, Db major juxtaposed to Fm7/b5 and F dim
 DAW Apple Logic Pro X MIDI Akai Professional keyboard

E-INSTRUMENTS Concert Grand
Ambient Lead Clarinet Solo  Session Strings Studio Double Basses  Deep Round Bass Synth Fingerstyle Electric Bass
E-PERCUSSION
Platinum Dreams  Drum ‘N Bass Remix 
Roland TR-808 Kit 
Studio Tight Kit Tambourine  Latin Kit  
COVER ART is original CGI by SUNNYBECK using a composite derived from AI-generated images rendered as original CGI, then retouched and designed in Photoshop.

Released on SoundCloud 
Thursday, Sept. 18, 2025, 11:12 PM ET
All rights reserved 2025
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Equinox

Afternoon Without Tea

IT'S NOT A GAME

It's not a game

Big Wheel Change

Peaceful

@mychaelbull - NOSOSCHORROSOSRASTRERO! cn @pepeaguas10000

Zielony Kod Atlantydy

stortion 9 55 bpm take 1 73125

Questo brano è stato registrato il primo febbraio 2009 durante la performance dell'Orastrana "Il si bemolle dell'avvenir", nell'ambito della rassegna di musica e letteratura "Sil-La-Bo", organizzata dall'ARCI di quella città, che coinvolgeva oltre all'Orastrana anche Antonio Malagrida con Enrico Paolucci e Federico Tiburzi, i Li.B.Ra. con Marco Scarponi e Augusto Amabili, Giulia Elisei con Vanni e Flamì' di Luponair (Radio Erre) e l'immenso Massimo Zamboni.
La poesia è "Arcadia Felix", di Carlo Natali.
Al basso c'è Mauro Rocchi e ai marchingegni elettronici c'è Thomas Graber. 

[unreleased] L'Orastrana - Arcadia Felix (live @ ARCI Recanati MC 2009-02-01)

Psychosis brought me to music production when it became the easiest way for me to communicate my ineffable experiences at the end of my first psychotic break, which lasted a long eight months. As you can imagine, there was much to express. My album “Desert of Delusion” was the strongest processing tool I had acquired to work through what was the most turbulent and invigorating time of my life. 

This wasn’t just a one-off, though. I would go on to experience two more psychotic breaks, with the most recent one being last summer! BUT! I didn’t have to be hospitalized for that one. I’m getting better at this! 

I also have a wicked severe case of ADHD, which is where my name comes from! My primary personality trait is ENERGETIC and as such, I get bored very easily when a loop plays for too long. To combat this, I constantly vary up the instruments and samples I’m using! I aim to create ever-evolving soundscapes that take listeners on a grand journey of the mind, much like what I experienced during my MANY hours of disappearing into Shpongle, OTT, and Entheogenic while psychotic. I want to recreate that immersive experience for the listener and share how I experience music!  

I have a severe brain injury from being hit by a truck as a child. Because of this, my energy waxes and wanes and I’m rather inconsistent on here but I’m trying my best and slowly getting better! It affects my music production in the COOLEST of ways though, because I have a touch of audio-tactile synesthesia. You may find sounds that repeat themselves in my songs, like the deep bubbling of a tabla or the squiggly twang of a jaw-harp. I like to use sounds that FEEL good! 

I’ve only been producing for a little over a year and have VERY much to learn but I LOVE to meet new people! If you have any tips or questions or just want to say hi, PLEASE feel free to drop me a message! I PROMISE I’ll respond as soon as I’m able! 

I hope you enjoy!!~ 

(All digital images made with AI)

fictionalive / popoems series / hyper media reports 
2001 / 2011 / 2024

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/ to(tally) fictionalive or not

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multi-layered, holistic art project

it speaks take what speaks

/ see
I want to love – but I need to hate
I need to hate – but I want to love

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nor this nor that
no black and white
no left or right

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/ + / ⭕️ and the rest will follow


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welcome, traveler
made with passion 
just for you

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Liminal Leaf - Feat. Alan Watts

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