(づ｡◕‿‿◕｡)づ I wanna be a snail now

I mean, if I wanted to pirate it, I would have just done so from soundcloud directly... This is about supporting an artist as much as it's about having an offline copy

It sure is an attractive song, so bandcamp as you mentioned above is a wise choice. You got that vibe in you, but i honestly think you and your voice can exceed beyond this jewel of yours. 👍

This song reminds me of my partner to much. I literally call xem snail. Were online relationship but i cant wait for the day i can hold xem in my arms and not just call and text all the time <3

lyrics:
coming to terms with dying alone
mindless lobotomy staring at phone
after having a life that is empty at most
brain damaged parasite seeking a host
i have 22 years worth of baggage you see
and nobody can carry such deadweight for me
im expendable   surely im great for the good
but the bad is so bad that it ruins the mood
exploding head syndrome is always a blast
and i bend over backwards and land on my ass
which is always the issue thats holding me back
making excuses for people who treat me like crap
so id stay home from school but now school is at home
so i lay in my bed all day browsing my phone
neurodivergency eating my time
wasting my life being online

down at rock bottom , midlife crisis coming soon
throwing me out from a plane with no parachute
i have no plans for my life and nothing to do
nothing to do
down in the gutter, surrounded by sewage drains
stinking up everything till i relapse again
rock bottom doesn’t feel so different from my bed
so i guess

coming to terms with my spinstery self
is less of a shame spiral more like accept
so i’ll just live as a vampire suck out the fun
of every person who thinks im the one
i dont like to imagine the future at all
but maybe without all the trouble of love
i’d be fine on my own drinking blood from a bag
500 years old and still just as sad
so the futures abhorrent , and the past is a pain
and the present is empty and boring and lame
homemade brain tumor eating my skull
gnawing and gnashing head empty no thoughts
and livings repetitive  lifes just a bust
everythings relative  i am just dust
just the bug you brush of your ear
singing my songs that nobody hears
down at rock bottom , midlife crisis come again
throwing me out from a roof with no working brain
i have no goals for my life and nothing to say 
nothing to say
down in the gutter, surrounded by rusty pipes
falling asleep in the shitwater overnight
from shit i have come and to shit i’ll return thats  fine
thats fine

Rock Bottom

Body Terror Song (AJJ cover)

Love Me Dead (Ludo cover)

lyrics:

im becoming consistently worse everyday
and i am turning into someone i really hate
and time just ticks on the final day will never come
i can’t give up so i am forced to keep on
all ive wanted is suddenly so grey and dull
aspirations have turned into a muddy blob
nothing spikes me and nothing ever really stays
only person i trusted to suddenly went away

sleeping till the day is new 
sleeping till i feel confused  
doing all the things i shouldn’t 
picking fights and acting stupid 
no one really sees me do they?
if they did why are they here then?
all i do is make them sad
all i do is always bad


how i wish i never mattered to anyone
dissapointing is worse when its someone you love
and thats what i do, consistently ill let you down
i promise you, its better if you get out now
all I’ve wanted is suddenly so out of reach
how i miss it, the hopeful naitivity 
back when i dreamed, so convinced it’d work out soon
only 15, now im 23 in june

sleeping till the time is stuck
sleeping till i can’t wake up
doing everything to get by
is that why im still alive now?
why have i not cracked the code yet?
am i looking in the wrong place?
all i do is push my luck
all i do is always wrong

Always Wrong

no surprises (radiohead cover)

new remastered version of this song.

lyrics:
this is blood cute and whatcha looking at 
or watcha looking for here
can i help you with anything else 
than standing in the corner looking weird
i am just tired 
of being alone
but when i am not
i want to go home
to be on my own
what the fuck!
i wish i was drunk
happy and loving
and not so messed up

cause life is worthless at times
but sometimes it feels alright
should i stay then
is that good enough for me?

if half my food is moldy
i would throw it in the trash
so why should i  continue   
living isn’t it like eating the rest

so when my friends go thru a breakup how should i help them 
can i even help them?
and if i have a crush on someone should i just kill them? 
or maybe kill myself?  
i dont know how to act i dont know what to say
my only purpose is helping but i can’t even do that
i dont know how to act i dont know what to say
my only purpose is helping but i can’t even do that

so if im ugly inside  how should i change that
does it even change anything that im aware of it?
i am a huge disappointment to everyone!
i wish i was happy and i wish i was fun

i remember when we walked thru the museum
so much anxiety i could barely speak to you
but you said: you dont have to think your thoughts anymore
cus now ill think them for you

im a crying machine im waiting for the train
hoping you are in it  cause i miss the things you say

ill miss them even more
when i one day must go
i know that things will change
i just know
and even if you say
that maybe they will not
they have always done before
so i just dont trust it
and even when you say
that maybe they will not
they have always done before
so i just dont trust it

so when my friends go thru a breakup how should i help them  
can i even help them?
and if i have a crush on someone should i just kill them?  
or maybe myself?  

i am drinking blueberry ice tea like a real girl
i dont want anyone to think i am a real girl
what the fuck is quote unquote a real girl
i dont ever wanna fucking be a real girl
i am drinking blueberry ice tea like a real girl
i dont want anyone to think i am a real girl
what the fuck is quote unquote a real girl
i dont ever wanna fucking be a real girl

bloodcute - Real Feelings From The Underworld

lyrics:

im just a sorry little snail 
that slimed my way into your life
and now you almost have a kid
and now you almost have a wife
and we are sitting in your kitchen
and i watch you drawing me
you always make me look so pretty
always make me feel so seen

its been like 3 years since i met you
but i have known you all my life
cus as a kid i was so certain
there was an angel by my side
and in the nights where i was sure
that life was never gonna change
i knew to stick around for something
and it made sense the day we met

how’d you find me
how’d i find you?
why’d you like me?
like i liked you?
were you hiding all these years
or did i just not know where to look?
but now you got me
and now i got you

and we are sitting in your kitchen
and we are lighting our smokes
and you are watching me laugh dumbly
at some innapropriate joke
and that is something that i vowed to
stick around to always see
 im watching over you
the way you’ve always been watching over me

and the daniel johnston t-shirt
covered in neon pink paint
that you bought in san fransisco
but decided to give me
and all your stories of your lifetimes
of your family and friends
and all the things that you’ve created
all the lives that you have changed
i hope you know that you are special
hope you know how good you are
hope you know you’ve changed my life
and let me have another start
you are my friend and you’re my family
and if i cannot be your kid
i will still be there till forever
the way i hope you’ll be for me

Guardian Angel

lyrics:

i haven’t done my best but ill do it now
all these years i was too busy fighting for my life
now i feel like i am allowed to sleep
i can crawl into my bed and melt into my sheets
if im too paralysed to get up after all
i will stay in bed and scrapbook not just lie and sulk
i will continue on
i will not hurt myself
i will stay alive i’ll make the very best of it

i know my shrink she says im not nice to myself
but i will try to act as though i am my dearest friend
i will brush my teeth and i will take my meds
i will do all of the things i couldnt do back then
if im too sick to do what i want to do
i will make a list to make sure that im able to
i will forgive myself
for years I’ve spent in bed
and i will stay alive so i can play my songs and sing

i haven’t lost the game  im just not good at it yet
and that is fine when i have all this time to be the best
i will clean my room  and ill do laundry too
i will even take a shower i won’t fucking lose
if everything feels dark i will close my eyes
and i will count the moving lights and all the dancing stars
i will take a breath
i will ground myself
and i will sleep and wake up try again another day
 

why does it seem so abstract to be fine?
at least i am not crying all the time now
stomach please stop bubbling with rocks
churning full of fear and full of knos
but i will prove them wrong, every single dark thought
that doubted me ill prove to them that illness hasn’t won so
i dont think ill ever be like you
 but ill be happy too

I'll Be Happy Too

lyrics:

this song won’t write it self instead i yank it out with force
i keep on twisting hoping something gives something like sweet remorse
i dont remember anymore why i now avoid my friends
something just split in me and then i kept on wishing for the end
i had a conflict brewing up, something that felt just like a storm
but now my feelings simmered down and chose to hide and shrivel up
i cannot vocalise my fears i cannot feel when i am mad
i cannot dream about the good i only dream about the bad

hi how are you? i am shit, in fact im getting worse and worse
i want to cry but i feel numb, someone just call the fucking nurse
i keep on hitting what i thought was now the lowest of my low
but then theres something under that, another endless hungry hole
i know you’ll hate me in the end, i feel it come to that at last
i am too needy, im too much, i am like touching broken glass
you cannot care for me enough, and i can’t satisfy my needs
so i will want and i will want and never feel relief
i want to die i want to dig a hole to hide in for a while
i want to sleep until i finally wake up and start to cry
i feel so strung up like a rubberband, two seconds till i pop
but i can’t stop myself from bottling everything up

i am wicked worse and what a curse that is
to be the ever lonely wicked witch
i am so overly involved
but i am still detached
i want to help you but i can’t

I Can't

lyrics:

just because i survived 
doesnt make me stronger
i dont feel like a survivor
i feel like frankensteins monster
artificially alive
with shackles stapled to my ankles
carrying weights that aren’t mine
with a body torn and tangled

i am still alive just like a cockroach
hiding underneath your sink
i survived but not on purpose
and what do i have to show for it?
a repertoire of sorry songs
and calloused fingers playing chords
i write and write with no prevail

i have a backpack full of rocks but all the rocks build up in time
and whilst i know their mine to carry , they were never really mine
i have to bear your heavy burden, have to bear it and survive
but god i can’t keep pushing rocks up hills when they keep rolling down

so im staying in my dirt hole
like an ostrich saving face
leave my tossed out dirty clothes around
like a makeshift bed
and if i curl up in the corner
to cry until i sleep
that’ll be another question
i’ll avoid and then repeat

not saving myself for anyone
im saving you from me
cus im as toxic as a wasteland
and as awful as can be
im like candy good in portions
but ill carve holes in your teeth
and ill smother all your organs
till you grow tired of me

i have a chain that jinge jangles all the way home to my bed
and if my bodys scarred and mangled that means im making progress
i know moving on will hurt and holy fuck it hurts like hell
but god i can’t push rocks up hills without hurting myself

Hurting Myself

lyrics:

dumbass what are you doing? tell me! 
can’t you see that person didnt care what you were saying
you got ignored again cus you are boooring
but can you really blame them when you act the way you do?

listen stupid, you are ugly. all your friends know too
just look at them, you see how they avoid ya?
you are the darkness that surrounds you
thats why everybody hates you 
and trust me everybody hates you

take a breath and take one more until ur hyperventilating
be ashamed of your anxiety, another thing ur faking
please do everyone a favour and just quit this whiny shit
but you’re enjoying this pretending, you’re enjoying acting sick
if you really were depressed then tell me how come you are laughing?
i live inside your brain so i can tell when you are bluffing
please stop crying, im just telling you the truth, somebodys gotta
when   you’ve    got everybody else convinced

fuckface why are you happy? stop it!
dont forget the razor that i stuffed into ur pocket
just be yourself. lame and gloomy.
do you really think that anyone would you like you if they knew me?
listen asshole, you are worthless.
just a nervous little creep who never really found a purpose.
think you’ll catch up? you’ll be sorry.
the only thing you’re really good fors making everybody worried

little loser you should hold your breath and never breathe again
you should just realise by now i am your one and only friend
you think that anyone would like you if they knew what you were thinking?
it doesn’t take a lot to see right thru your bullshit made-up illness
i see everything about you that you try so hard to hide
every single ugly thought and every single fucked up part
you wanna hurt your friends? well go ahead, stick around and watch
you will inherently cause problems if you choose to get involved

little blood girl wheres your power? wheres that confidence you preach?
are you just a little liar? just a little lying freak?
are you deaf? why dont you answer? cut your thighs and make it bleed
i can make you do the things that makes your shrink break down and weep
no one likes you, they will kill you, everyone is out to get you,
you’re a liar, a deciever, no one cares about your pain
fucking scumbag,  youre a fake and you’re a fraud and you’re a failure
you should just die, it’d lift a burden from your friends

you think your illness is whats holding you back? truth is it is you
you are the reason for your illness, everything that you’ve been thru
you’re only as bad as your worst thoughts
and where does that leave you?
kill everyone, kill everyone, kill yourself! come on!
just be grateful cause i could be worse, im censored for this song
you are thinking this so there must be some truth in here somewhere?
dont you think so too?

blood girl why are you hiding?
even with the tv on im here inside your mind
why dont you answer anymore? im bored just playing with myself
its way more fun when you throw up or think you’re gonna go to hell
the pills won’t kill me, i hope you know that
i am a chronic little demon
and ill stay cus your my best friend
whats gas lighting? like on a stove?
oh by the way
was the oven on before you left for school?

Inner Dialogue

Hello. I am Blood Girl! 
I am a 24 year old nonbinary creature that sings about sadness and bettering

Guardian Angel

Blood Girl

Recent comments

♡~dyslexicwitch~♡

getwastedtime

Frank Jensen

Lilith

Related tracks