tsilyalp

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Love & Insecurity

Deformity.

The witness inside my head only reminds me of my past sins and what feels like futile amends. There is no end for me, no way to go back, only forward in overcoddled cloaks of shame, and there will be no encore.

Sad Memoir: Lingering Guilt

Ivory Rasmus songs

Wriggle

Wriggle (Cardopusher's EBM Remix)

Wriggle (Homemade Weapons Remix)

Our Time

Lyrics: 
I dig a new hole everytime I try to speak
they're justified in always calling me a freak
I dreaded all this every day of every week
I know I'm better now 
but what's there to believe in
if I'm open you miss it in commotion
drops in the ocean of your favorite potion

y'all know all your reasons and feed them
you breathe to see me bleeding
I'm seething and chiefing some weed to wane this feeling
I hate it and love it
I'm patient with some shit
I'm breaking enough
is this something that's fun 
If I weren't always evil in your eyes
tell me what you'd have here to despise
you fill all the blanks you find with lies

take it how it is
learn to live with my misguidance
hate the world you're in but you'll be happy you survived us
we all break
you'll always win again
my friend, just stay and play pretend

kintsugi

spotify

Weird

Lyrics:

Your grand lifestyle's feints hiding guilt
Nailed to stilts in your crowd
Point my head to the clouds
Now endowed, you can fail em and you're still kept round
Double down while you can till they all find out
You wanted my harassment
You blast my every action
Your girlfriend wrote your posts, hope you're proud of all the acting
I'm posed to be your poison
Abusers live in factions
I'd love to see them scramble
I'd live to catch y'all lacking

I'm going numb
I guess my head can't take it
Make me shake when I'm off medication
Bless the weight, fuck a fate
I'm no patient
Thought I escaped him, it's just baked in
Fun, I know my worldview's breaking
I see the people and behaviors I would take in
To you I've always just been something that you'll break in
When done discard you don't care you'll replace it

I know more of your predation than I knew you
Ooh
All you'll be to me is trauma that I pushed through
Simply paint me as a fiend in their eyes
Sit and watch from afar as you scar me twice
Told that I'll be running
Everybody wants to find an angle where I'm bluffing 
I won't risk it all for nothing
I'm fatally invested in my trials meaning something

What's the point of the fight
I'm broken and right
You're just enabled by your fans but police won't care bout your side
Is this what you wanted?

Paralysis

Lyrics:
Hear the atmosphere 
They told me once 
Should've been clear
I'm not welcome here 
I hate myself from living fears 
I thought i veered
I ran and ran they're always near 
You're never clear 
Accept it and live

Live with guilt and all your shame all despite the fame
compliments just foreshadow betraying any trust you gain
you frequent a mask for the pain and I did the same
your actions attached to your name make your work in vein

I hope you know I didn't do this for no reason
you're the type of person to attack me to get even
and hey, you fucking made me this way
cus all I think about is how I'm getting betrayed

Fear the atmosphere
you ran and ran and now they hear
you're never cleared
might hate yourself throughout the years
you're cloaked in drear
and erroneous fears
endowed by your peers
i can see it from here

Atmosphere

Lyrics:

either lost track of the gamut or back then i didn't understand it
I see a power play and panic
reminded how I'm abandoned
I can't take this pressure
it's something that I'm damned with

my actions waste advantage
and I can't fucking manage

realized the power of my words and i froze
some others would've lied till they rose
eyes surround you, what's your platform pose
think I locked up because i didn't know
talk about symptoms on tracks, not the causes 
you said i sought attention everytime I broke and lost it
spoke on a problem that i had and you would cause shit
I became a victim of my friend and now I live on damaged
And no one seems to understand it
I'm moving feeling I'm too manic
I break down when my head's not managed by best friends
(abandoned)
I know they see me now as less then
they think I've got the worst intentions
I'm cut off from the first impression

Sequence

Lyrics:

I'm losing, I'm livid
I'm loving, forgive this
I wish you the best life
I hate me, I hate mine
I run out and break down
I'm fucked up, unheard sound
I lack worth, it all hurts
I can't breathe
I fall first

I'll just leave
I'll just leave

I see so much to hate myself for
Ignore the bleeding be yourself more
Won't see what you talk about health for
Call it misleading, you need help more
They fell short

Wings

Lyrics:

God please, teach me how to grow

I got bad habits and good ideas
haphazard when near ideals
subpar, that's the default feel
thusfar I don't know what's real
I imagined my friends hid hate
I'd create what I thought they'd say
Inundate me to altercate
is this really my fate?

I told them that I'd change
I molded to the pain
Land lower than I aim
It always ends the same

I'm never getting saved

Around It

Kaori Sawada - We Took Each Other's Hand (Full)

cover art by///https://twitter.com/Raptors__

LYRICS///
you've been noticing 
all my little flaws in my pursuit of temptation in spite of laws
and I didn't mean to leave a footprint
or the fanta misplaced half empty in the fridge
but don't get scared if things are amiss
life's mostly average but you've got a secret friend
just live in bliss
take it step by step 
like i did on the ledges

and you're allegedly getting scared now
at least that's what I heard from the talk in the lounge
but that's fine
I'll leave a note to change your state of mind
and you don't have to worry,
love I can be cleanly even when I'm in a hurry

apparently things have settled down which seems so reassuring
I just want you know that I'm not doing this to start hurting
It's just that I want a normal life
and your personality seems to compliment mine
mine
just know I have nowhere to go
but for now I'll call your unlocked windows home
I'll meet you at the bar tomorrow
acting like I don't know who you are
and that's fine as long as we're not far apart
not far apart

purchase/download <3

Secret Friend

AWESOME AVI BY https://twitter.com/ariwannii GO FOLLOW THEM

LYRICS///
feelings flow like an ocean when you're around
they come down, surround and drown me
and I'd love to help you when you're down
but for now 
all I can do is sit outside your window tonight
and hope that you haven't found the mistakes in my ruse
the little clues I've left saying that   
I want you

all i see when I close my eyes is you
and the insides of your room
the layout, the payout of being in and out everynight
I feel like a cloud drifting into the sky that's your life
but it's our time
and I won't lie
I just want to make this right
or at least bring into light 
what I feel
what I've felt for you
for the longest time
you've been on my mind
no, this can't beright
this can't be right

feelings flow like an ocean when you're around
they come down, surround and drown me
and I'd love to help you when you're down
but for now 
all I can do is sit outside your window tonight
and hope that you haven't found the mistakes in my ruse
the little clues I've left saying that   
I want you

download & support <3

Clouds

cover art by///twitter.com/Raptors__ <3

LYRICS//
 looking past the awkward iintros and the blast we had last night
i'll let you know who I am
I'm just a close friend,
well maybe that's a lie

a secret one if you may
there's no need for alarm 
what we have shouldn't dissipate
I guess I'll find out if you care anyways
about me
about how I'm trapped in your gaze
about us
about all the things I want us to have
and my short lived bloodlust
there's no need to fear 
I just want you to be happy seemingly for once
it just feels so clear to me
for what I want for us
what I'd do for your love

pushing past premium prussian blue curtains
has become a past time a habit
just lurking in the shadows waiting for more, but what if instead i knocked on your door?
I never took time to think of what could occur if I
came out into the light, in your eyes

talk to me

Dissipate

AMAZING ART BY https://twitter.com/pizzzatonix !! Go follow em!

Lyrics//
play with me everyday like it's your past time
with pretty words, it's not may but you're a valentine
oh it's time
I'm unravelling and pulling strings like a puppeteer in his prime
I tend to look at our relations and love it
you're like a drug with a nice smile
can't get enough of it
oh I can't enough of it
and when i do I feel i go through withdrawal
 your personality on paper is on par with the pretty pictures you draw

maybe you don't think the same
and maybe you'll feel that way for the rest of days but I'm gonna move on,
maybe move you past your second thoughts or at least try but I thought I was right for what you sought

I spent hours thinking about you and in this thought I realized it's fine if you don't wanna be mine
I can just make sure that we don't drift apart 
and that when you feel down you know you have someone who has your back 
and that you still have their heart

SAMPLE WAS FROM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ahSmNv0P7lA

I essentially took it apart and put it back together. just select small regions, copy and paste drum hits so that they're nearly perfectly on beat, and then consolidate all of the clips and loop. 

das how u make usable samples/loops yes

purchase and download!

Is It You

wonderful avi is by https://twitter.com/Ishu_tani ! 

Lyrics//
look at me
let me show you what you shouldnt be
im a walking disaster
with my heart sown on my sleeve
oh, you dont believe?
you dont believe in me?
well ive had this dream for years and im only sixteen
so im gonna get what i deserve whether it's now or in the future

these words arent passion they're pain
and it's driving me insane
im trying my hardest to please
but things havent felt the same
and for better or worse
you feel no remorse anymore

this song was made using snippet's of bob james' "westchester lady" which i recommend ya check out here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V56yeZtqQTs

❤ enjoy the track(s), and have a great day! ❤

icon artist's twitter

Is It Me

avatar is by https://twitter.com/ariwannii and i! <3

lyrics: oh im not holding back
when we first met i had a heart attack
and your loves a certain kinda trap
that once i get stuck there's no chance of coming back

i compensate and quantinize,
you fill the void and conjugate with my broken lines
and im sat by your side wasting time
but in the moment its like im truly alive

sample is from: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Amzp7W0RkPA
it's a great song, i really recommend checking it out :)

Not Holding Back

Japanese Soda - Single

Japanese Soda

oh darling you're such a lamb
!!art!! - twitter.com/Blushily

Dance With Me

Hey Me

Stream/Download: https://masn.lnk.to/HateMeSo

Follow MASN
https://instagram.com/masonrupper
https://twitter.com/masonrupper
https://MASN.lnk.to/YTSubscribe
https://www.facebook.com/masnmusic

#SCFIRST #GETMOREPLAYS

How To Kill A Rockstar

Hate Me!

Stream/Download

Hold Me (feat. Mishaal)

updog - break the norm

🎵 stream the song: https://cloudkid.lnk.to/breakthenorm

--

Website: http://itsupdog.com​​
Soundcloud: http://www.soundcloud.com/updog​​
Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/updog​​
Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/updogydog​​
Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/updogydog​​

--

Verse 1:

Im stuck in a rut and I can’t get out, where did this go so wrong? 
Put all my eggs in one basket, that sh** all turned to mold.
Left everyone I knew behind, I'm better off alone
The kind of stuff I'd tell myself, to boost my own ego.

Pre-Chorus:

‘Cause I'm so pitiful, 
Selfish, critical 
Indecision beats me. 
‘Cause I'm so pitiful, 
Selfish, critical 
Indecision beats me.

Chorus:

‘Cause darling I’ve been thinking lately,
That things might not have gone my way.
Intentions started in the best form,
But I have every will to, break the norm, cant conform, once again I lost my thrown.

Verse 2:

I'm all out of luck my heart just broke I got nowhere to turn, 
My last remaining hope just died I put it in an urn.
Cant seem to find a reason to just carry on alone,
The lies i like to tell myself to turn myself to stone.

Pre-Chorus:

‘Cause I'm so pitiful, 
Selfish, critical 
Indecision beats me. 
‘Cause I'm so pitiful,
Selfish, critical 
Indecision beats me.

Chorus:

‘Cause darling I’ve been thinking lately,
That things might not have gone my way.
Intentions started in the best form,
But I have every will to, break the norm, cant conform, once again I lost my thrown.

Outro:

Gone my way,
Intentions started in the best form,
But I have every will to, break the norm, cant conform, break the norm, cant conform, once again I lost my thrown.

Skellies EP

break the norm

🎵 stream

ENJOY.
STREAM HERE:
https://lnk.to/wingyoneandonly
LYRICS:
https://genius.com/Wingy-one-and-only-lyrics

One and Only (feat. liightflower) @wingy.mp3

Serotonin

listen to my music

22 y/o nb gay artist n musician 

all vocals, lyrics, and instrumentals are by me unless mentioned
(i will credit any samples that are major parts of the song tho)

DM me for features/commissions