MrDenisoyd - COCAINE (prod. sadface)

You know nothing at all
Hands up on the wall
Caught up in the dark
Falling down from the start

Put your hands on me
Torture me some more
I can’t sleep
I might lose control 
Break me down
Till I fall apart
Till I fall apart

I’m good
On surface
Cant hide the feeling 
Hide the feeling 
Hide the thing that’s 
Keeping me down 

Put your hands on me
Torture me some more
I can’t sleep
I might lose control 
Break me down
Till I fall apart
Till I fall apart

Tell me something 
I don’t know baby
Caught a side of the dark 
Let it take me
I won’t go home tonight
Got no fear for the knife 
I said won't pick a side 
So come on 
Come 

Put your hands on me
Torture me some more
I can’t sleep
I might lose control 
Break me down
Till I fall apart
Till I fall apart

Hands

sorry for leaving
prod. @rvxhenri

lyrics: 
bad bitch she gone die for me
she hits me cuz she into me
cut my veins i love the way
you look when blood run down your face
bad bitch she gone die for me
she hits me cuz she into me
cut my veins i love the way
you look when blood run down your face

tripped and fell but i got up
nothing stopping me anymore
i ask her if she need something
cuz tonight’ll be the last she breathes
take her soul come with me
i wanna steal your energy
walk this way come with me
i wanna steal your energy
when im out dont look my way
when im out dont talk to meh
ripping off my face again
so theres no point in bothering
bothering bothering
bothering bothering

someone teach me how to love
im scared im falling out of touch
i dont think im having fun
pretending is not enough
someone teach me how to love
im scared im falling out of touch
i dont think im having fun
pretending is not enough


bad bitch she gone die for me
she hits me cuz she into me
cut my veins i love the way
you look when blood run down your face
bad bitch she gone die for me
she hits me cuz she into me
cut my veins i love the way
you look when blood run down your face

DIE FOR ME <im_back> [prod. henri]

vocals by jozie, sasha and me
produced/mixed/mastered by me
cover art by jozie and me

@joziehaze
@lilsashadying

lyrics:

i’ve been down that road before and swore that i wouldn’t go back
this path appears in horror stories and i should’ve known that
i broke the glass in a thunderstorm, in the pouring rain
i tried to ignore the pain, but there were tears i couldn’t hold back
i’ve been down that road before and swore that i wouldn’t go back
this path appears in horror stories and i should’ve known that
i broke the glass in a thunderstorm, in the pouring rain
i tried to ignore the pain, but there were tears i couldn’t hold back

checked my options, weighed 'em all, uh
i dont wanna stay involved, 'cause
all these voices playin’ god,
sorry gotta bend it back and break it off, uh
no pink and no lavender hues
just black that's what i'm havin’ to do
no sunsets, i am not the one yet
i been in remission, i don't wanna be an addict for you
i don't wanna talk, i'm a dead girl walking
off of the wall, it's f the world often enough
it's a problem to solve in a rush
they expect me to not give a fuck
life is a bitch and it's a hot fuck, no love
if you been where i been, i know, i don't judge
but get off those pills, let the pipe hit the ground
only shot we got with life to like this shit now

bitch i'm kickin' shit, feel like it's judo mane
zip up a bag, part it five ways like bruno mane
smoke up a blunt
thinkin' 'bout life got me feelin' sum things i ain't felt in some months
day turnin' night 'n i'm stuck in this phase 
but still gotta hunt, i got paper to chase
and these n*ggas got anna send shots to they face
lil bruh had no ammo there's tears in his face, damn 
s a s h a bitch i'm so high god praised my name
thirteen we strapped, blacked out insane 
wit' dcr you know that's gang, aye
smoke a junt
got so damn faded i vomit lunch 
i slice up my wrist 'n then cover up 
momma ask me what happened can't tell her nun
one more bad habit i conjured up

i’ve been down that road before and swore that i wouldn’t go back
this path appears in horror stories and i should’ve known that
i broke the glass in a thunderstorm, in the pouring rain
i tried to ignore the pain, but there were tears i couldn’t hold back

don't look at me, a quiet room works like a painkiller
love is like a medicine but only 'cause it tastes bitter
being stared at feels just like being skinned alive
tell me how to tolerate the pain of a million knives
i want to go back, all i really hear in the night
is the buzzing of the fluorescent lights
that keep the darkness out of my comfort zone
they're the only pillars that keep me alive

blacklight_whitenoise

Spotify

blacklight_whitenoise w/jozie haze, sasha's dying

Wake in the classroom windows shut
The last thing I remember’s the truck
A reflection sees that I got crushed
I guess this is what they call bad luck

Put my hands on the ground and push myself back up again
Gasp from the corner when they see my face, a lost friend
They know the look but they can't remember a single name
Am I trapped in a hell forced to lay here and decay

They feel like they know what it's like
To sense like you're not real lost in time
I try to explain to you I care
It's just all, it's all in my head

Realities just a kick in the teeth
Numb yourself out to not feel a thing
Derealization comes with the flood
It's like my souls been dragged through the mud

Whiplash to the devil in front of me
He looks familiar reflections key
Cus that person  was always me
Dragging coffins around  to keep peace

change your mind now perspectives are skewed
He wants to speak about how I was used
So easily no he didn't have to do a thing
Cus this hell was brought on by me

Cracks in the window frame speak the truth
They  show me memories of how I was abused
A family tormented in pain
Bottled down to ignite the flame

He tells me secrets of when I was a kid
I didn't know much but he knew I gave in
To jealousy acts of blindness, corrupted fiend
I guess the one I really hated was always me

They feel like they know what it's like
To sense like you're not real, lost in time
I try to explain to you I care
It's just all, it's all in my head

Realities just a kick in the teeth
Numb yourself out to not feel a thing
Derealization comes with the flood
It's like my soul’s been dragged through the mud

Lets Go

LEDs blind me
yeah, stigmatism covers up what I wanna see
when I’m looking at your pretty face, yeah you got me
wrapped around you little fingers yeah, my soul was free for the taking
 
it’s like what did you mean I didn’t get it
stuck in the past with my obsession
got a collection of memories 
burn them on the wall for all to see
 
it’s like what is that smell my flesh is burning
stuck in the tide I see you turning
fragments of wood sticking out your flesh
the void is leaking from my chest
 
my friends now covered in the dragon’s rot
they didn’t seem to mind that I was stuck
with the crows above calling out my name
didn’t seem to matter how much I changed
 
loved ones passed out in the burning house
smoked bellowed in my lungs and I’m left in doubt
like was I the one to start this flame
didn’t mean to burn out now nothing remained
 
now the clouds above are looking at me
filling their guts with my pity
crying out loud, I’m smothered in shame
resurrection the love I called pain
 
now the fragile bodies pile up like logs
turn my back on my problems cus I know its a lot
this reality is nothing that I could dream
guess misery has finally found his peace

I guess the person that just I really miss is me
yeah, what have I become
misery just finds a way to seep into me
I guess it’s time to say that I’m done
 
every day is suffering so please won’t you leave
you only care to know that you’ve won
sink into the past to find that memories haunt me
this wasn’t something that could be love

sick of me, sick of us
yeah, every time I try to
explain it I seem to rot
yeah, fake friends corrupt
 
yeah can’t get grip on myself fingers are shaking losing patience
of me and the place I call home from the start I was just alone
lather myself in drugs to feel nothing cus it better then feeling something
cus I don’t want to feel this anger again from a childhood where I didn’t understand
 
the consequences of being different pushed aside there was no interest.
of understanding who I could be and who I became
until I met you I thought you were everything that I deserve
you brought hell to my mental state I didn’t think it could get worse
 
down here now in the abyss I see friends are suffering  all the same
burning out our mental trauma from the bones of family ones that lay 
when the osulouths come down and change the forms that we try to portray
distorted figures is what became, no face could recognize the pain.
 
how do we survive when we don’t understand the person in front of us
disgusted by reflections of everyone that just seem to pass.
now time doesn’t wait for now one, so we ignore the issues and drown it out
so, we live in constant agony fill us to the brim aching doubt

I miss me

STREAM

AGONY

Jamen Johns' first alternative emo rap EP "When I'm Down."

Engineered by @Stemodity

Already Dead

THE FALL  [Prod.05alagen x taymxru]

I GOT YOU AYE
EH>>>????????

Lyrics:

what do you mean you don't know shit
you better leave i'm over it
i got a pistol on my lap
send you to credits in one tap
i keep on scheming so we lit
i got no reason so i quit
should get yo ass up out my trap
don't come to battle with no strap

gotta focus on demand
gotta drop a couple friends
gotta cry sometime at night
gotta kill my demons light
em up in flames turn em to glass
like the vice up in my bands
got a mask on my face
and my face in my hands
that trash where i lay
put the tv on replay
static drags into the midnight
till my mind can't find no shade
throwing shade on your thoughts
i been taught to stay away
fuck their poison made my choice
an kept you up out the decay


you re-payed it with a knife that's aight
it's fine by me
i'll just get duffel bags fill em with double bands
then go to lands you'll never see
i keep it silicone cos i'm not feeling em 
i cannot a trust when man don't bleed
fucking it i'm alien i will not save again
sick of the same shit on repeat

i got a circle of serpents
but know you'll always be the one
it's perfect i'm learning to close
my curtains from the sun
we be worthless no mercy i got no 
light to funnel through
rose gold grows mold all
around my known truths shoot

Catch Em Fore They Slice

Catch Em Fore They Slice (prod.  onlyrealcash)

Feature Artist: https://soundcloud.com/slothboipapi




Rivilin:

losing conscious from the panic attacks
yeah they build and swell deep inside you when you find you relapse
on pills that never helped you surface
yours breaking down, it’s hurting 

me and you and all of your friends
I see your wrists start to bleed when you panic again
with the razor blades cutting at your voice till you can’t speak
see your legs dangling but you won’t fall im holding on

cut up, cut up you falter
your blank stare just stares cut straight through me
again and again 
and again and again

I miss your smile from back then
your breathing but you are not there
its kills me, it kills me
it kills me again. 

I’ve never been deserted like this, yeah
now I know what they meant when they said that ignorance was bliss
with the pills and the pain that it just built
all the drugs that you tried just to numb yourself

cus im still suicidal
so you tell me that losing a best friend would never work out
but I lost you and lost a lot of time
losing myself in the depths of my mind

the game called life didn't work out on my end
im still struggling to get where I needed to be
but losing you hit the nail in the coffin
I’d be lying man if I said I didn’t think about you often

and im sick of it, 
I still get high every day like I used too
cus I miss you so much
yeah where did you go

$lothboi:

They ask me whats my problem is and then they fucking cry
Cuz they cannot handle stories of my mother fucking life like
Yes I seen some suicide and yes I’ve fucking tried
But I’m never going back to that fucking place, right?

Gone for some days and I’m back in night
I been on a fucking binge and I know it aint right
I been crying for a week but I been out of sight
So it ain't nobody's problem, shit its just my fight

I been fighting since the start
The age of sixteen
This depression made me dark
Sloth born from a seed

Like I don’t wanna start
The PTSD
But I seen bodies on the floor
Since I was 18, Fuck

I ain’t playing this my life
Yeah

Sloth really seen some sights
Man
Its been fucking my head damn
I MIGHT FUCKING JUMP AND END IT

Already Dead

Jamen Johns

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