songs i made during hard times

https://soundcloud.com/joshigues/vacation-nightcore-jxsie-beats

I've been trying my best, but I can't take it
She's been wanting the rest, while she is taken
She's been loving me less, she seems to hate it
Why don't she just take a vacation

She only love me when on anti-depressants
When she's off of them I can't get her attention
Her minds been going in every direction
But you know I can't follow directions
Cause anywhere I go
Can't make it back home
To the place I used to call
Everything and all

Feeling like I'm Autumn now, faded into fall
And I'm feeling like I'm Casperrr, now that I'm a ghost
And I'm feeling like Eternal
Cause I want you to say hello

I've been trying my best, but I can't take it
She's been wanting the rest, while she is taken
She's been loving me less, she seems to hate it
Why don't she just take a vacation

She thinks I'm falling out of love, but I'm just falling out of trust
She thinks it's falling into dust, I wish you knew I give a fuck
Ex-friends coming up to me I know they always fuss
Wanna turn 'em into goldfish, so I can name 'em Hush
Maybe then that'll be the time that they could shut up
I just know I had enough, and know that you have had enough
We can never get enough
In this thing called love

I've been trying my best, but I can't take it
She's been wanting the rest, while she is taken
She's been loving me less, she seems to hate it
Why don't she just take a vacation

visualizer

vacation (jxsie beats)

"if it all goes wrong" is a song released by joshiguess exclusively to the archive. this was not a song he wanted to release officially as all it was was a rant about life in the state he was in at the time. this song is very teen suiciide inspired with the distortion and style.

if it all goes wrong [moucha]

[mix by @joshiguess x @elena-paisley]
ill be doing this til my last breathe,
doesn't matter if i make the bread,
im just taking the things from my head,
i swear joking was all that you said,
i swear you were all joking bout death,
but now that one's dead ya talk less,
i swear yall put on the stress,
i just hoping that they stayin blessed, 

i was hoping to come in and check,
checking if u were alright,
left me on seen didn't text,
time passes by and i cry,
why would it ever happen,
i pray to god that it wasn't true,
i swear to god if i wasn't attracted,
i wouldn't be feeling so blue,
wondering what i should do,
am i the one that's the target,
i can't be actin all flawless,
cuz you know that there's many you have,
i swear you ain't going out sad,
you need to get over this,
i swear this life is feeling unlucky,
need a four leaf clover bitch,
this life is about success,
it's not about being the richest,
i swear i want the hugs and the kisses,
quarantine making me miss it,
like the suicide death of effect,
that it's taken on this toll of world,
when you seem to have lost a best friend,
no one can replace that girl,
i hope that she's good in another world,
hoping she's not in the underworld,
it's something i couldn't control,
it's a pleasure of guilt that i hold,
and that maybe i shouldn't have told,
i swear life has been getting more cold,
only warmth is from your computer,
why you feel like you're such a loser, yea

i swear that i cant do this anymore

Stop Joking Bout Death (MaxoKoolin, Wendelstyzer, Topo)

You may think that I hate you, but that just isn't it,
it's rightful that you blamed me i committed a sin,
and im asking for forgiveness, but i never could win,
i swear i didn't want us all living all in pretend,
but lets face it, you know i couldn't make it, every time
i'm uncomfortable with basics, and i knew i couldn't handle
 datin,  i never wanted to but with you feel i made it,

and i didn't wanna ruin reputations, i swear sometimes i hope this life is 
simulation cuz i don't want it to be true, when you livin with this on you, what you got? you got friends
who weren't really there that constantly remind you and you're staying from your distance and realizing
you're a fool, frickin loser in the pull, ain't doing things in school, for the past few years every time 
you've fallen off, and you've stayed inside your room because you fear of the outside, cuz the public probably hates
you now, im blessed with quarantine cause i do not need to be seen, cuz i swear i make it miserable for any other being
and there's people that will love you but how long will that last, want another future but im stuck inside my past
gotta fix myself up
 right now
(right now)

I swear there's a lot I could change from,
I can focus on myself now that it's done,
But when I feel like nothing what is there to take on,
I swear I always try to make my life more fun,
With you I felt complete I couldn't lose you, 
But it's rightful that you decided to lose me,
I swear if everyone be trying to expose me,
And I can't help but face the facts, but can't control me

(control me, wish you could be here and hold me, i know thats not a possibility anymore)

All My Fault

All My Fault (Capsctrl + Eddie B)

https://songwhip.com/joshiguess/shouldve-known-better
this was a one take, straight from the heart..
i should've treated you better, now it's just rainy weather, can't maintain self control, my heart's been getting cold, you really understood me, why
cant i understand you, i tried my best to handle, put myself in your sandals, here i go light the candle, i swear you were correct, can't get it out
my head, that you tried protecting, you saved me from ending, all that i could have been, wstill wish i was ur friend, i didn't need more or less,

i should've just known better, this is a homage letter, thought we would be together, longer than i'd remember, now we're both in our leisure, but my minds
like propellors, its going round in circles, trying to pass the hurdles, of those that criticize me, they want to hypnotize me, into thinking difference,
wish she was here to save me, at least i have her mittens, she was the perfect lady, i didn't treat her fairly, i really should have did, cuz lately i really 
miss, not just a simple kiss, just need to receive more comfort, didn't wanna make her heart hurt, i didn't respect her space, but to come back too late,
she'll never want me back, enemies love that im sad, they try to make fun of me, say im not improving, do they remember me, swear they obsess with me,
since they still message me, they keep on gossiping, keep my name out your mouth, you only give more clout to, a person that always doubts who, he could really
be, needs someone there for him, i can't say that i am nothing, cuz i know that i mean something, but im missing a part of me, the loving type energy, the norms
of a human being

Should've Known Better

set myself up for failure (rx808)

new album out now
tour tickets: https://ffm.bio/joshiguess

Stop Joking Bout Death (MaxoKoolin, Wendelstyzer, Topo)

JoshIGuess