page 32 kinda mid, page 31 was better ngl 🤬

ly caspy <33

lyrics:

waking up the same as u left me
pillies to the brain, i got plenty
tell me run away in the bentley
take away the pain that u fed me

im in the function
n i cannot function 
lung combusting
repercussion
u on sum fuck shit
playing me, percussion
~death wish~
blood gon drip my neck like issa necklace
name on top my wrist, look like a setlist
wake up, bake the bowl, this shit not even breakfast
eating breakfast
i be on my dread shit
blood gon drip my neck like issa necklace
name on top my wrist, look like my setlist

{casperrr}
i tried to run
but i an't fast
tried to fight 
but i knew i wouldn't last
these feelings
kicked my ass
but there's no way
i am ever going back 
wake up
drag myself outta bed again
face up
tryna face my oldest fucking friend
sadness
i think this is the end
timeless
im afraid i have no time left 

putting all my songs on her playlist
goth bitch
stare me in me eyes and
she looks flawless
falling 
deep into a faucet
i ain't notice
wore my heart on my sleeve
until you came and u broke it

{shizukesa + casperrr}
waking up the same as u left me
pillies to the brain, i got plenty
tell me run away in the bentley
take away the pain that u fed me

follow spotify!

death_wish w/ casperrr (yung rospo)

prod. sorrow bringer
artwork done by my gf :)

you broke me down was it worth it?

you broke me down was it worth it?
i’m breaking beneath the surface
waiting for a higher purpose
but i know that’s worthless
i fear not for the end
i know that i’ll be fine
cause i’m the after life 
i know that you’ll still be mine
i’m letting go of the past cause it was flawed by desgin

failed from the fucking beginning 
they were out to get me
but i ended up winning
so i’ll sit back and wait
while you take your place
fucking your lying games
you’re such a fucking waste time for me
now it’s time for you to see

you broke me beneath the surface
you’ll soon realize how worthless 
you were to me
i can finally breathe
i was on my knees 
begging for you to leave
my life for good this time
well it seems i finally got what’s mine

nothing can change my mind
nothing can help you now
watch as the blood drips down
from your eyes
while you cry
no surprise 

you broke me beneath the surface
you’ll soon realize how worthless 

you broke me beneath the surface
you’ll soon realize how worthless 
you were to me
i can finally breathe
i was on my knees 
begging for you to leave
my life for good this time
well it seems i finally got what’s mine

broken beneath the surface (sorrow bringer)

ily <3

Im sorry that we didnt last
I just want all this pain in the past
Our pictures still intact with the frame
Life wont ever feel like the same 
Oh no
Oh no

Depressed when i wake up
You ask that we make up
U cheat then we break up
Its toxic
And i dont want to be an option 
Oh no

And im so sorry that i couldnt change
You look at my face and im one to blame
You say that you love me
You say that you hate me
I dont care anymore 
Im sorry…

Im sorry that we didnt last
I just want all this pain in the past
Our pictures still intact with the frame
Life wont ever feel like the same 
Oh no
Oh no
Oh no

I know
I know

Prod @jeweler737

its the same feeling every night and i hate it... (jewelryboy)

mix & mastr @ztope

lyrics

this warmmm wind
this warmmm wind

we worship a god
while we’re all trapped inside of this cave
some of us piled up rocks, to leave us with no option to escape

i knew it never felt right
ive been sitting here the whole damn day
if i open my eyes, id still be blind to all of your ways

patience running thin 
20 years
like 50 scars
20 years and not one apart
last 7 spent in the dark
vague memorys of th light fill days,…
turned to spark

passages what’d keep me up
id read out loud every word and i know it came from the heart
but please do not take this heart
one half is u so i know its hard

its taken time 
but my patience thin and so is the line
curiosity never left 
so i crack the rock, not knowing if ill be fine
but u think i can just sit here living to die
like how’d u think we got here without having a closed mind

coz now there no going back 
im by myself like 20 feet deep
to leave ur home and take to the cold. 
aint my idea of being set free
unfortunately i came to my senses 
to be content with this i couldn’t see
 
i was living a lie
they forced me to believe
i see now y theres no evolution
20 years worth of retribution
peace and mind now a state of fusion
how could u be aware and not just lose it

scribbling text on the wood of a tree
then carve it without an idea of beauty
walk every trail till the bears have received 
but graft isnt enough to get them to believeeeeee

u think my leaving this place
for my own sake
this was a last resort
remorse

ill be in heavy debt for all the lives after
the paint washes off but not the damage

hidden beneath is the message from earth
unheard it must remain, so this gift is not cursed
those who fall short and find truth in these words
are left to dissolve into a hole that is absurd

two decades worth of retribution - pg 32 (message to bears)

You can catch me in our messages
Where she don't reply
I shoulda seen this coming I'm a pessimist
And I don't know why
So baby hold on
Don't let me go too soon
She wont believe anything that I got to say
So I got more to prove
All the silence kills me slowly
Can you be honest for once do you still want me
Cause you don't seem to care at all
Would you pick up if I called
Cause its not easy giving up on you the way that you give up on me

Oh oh
I'm not sorry for the way that I am
I'm fine being an idiot for you
I had you in my hands but you slipped right through
It wasn't part of the plan but what else can I do
Except wait and wait and wait and wait and wait oh yeah
Except wait and wait hate waiting on you

You can catch me in our messages
Where she don't reply
I shoulda seen this coming I'm a pessimist
And I don't know why
So baby hold on
Don't let me go too soon
She wont believe anything that I got to say
So I got more to prove
All the silence kills me slowly
Can you be honest for once do you still want me
Cause you don't seem to care at all
Would you pick up if I called
Cause its not easy giving up on you the way that you give up on me

THE AWKWARD SILENCE IS SO LOUD

spotify

THE AWKWARD SILENCE IS SO LOUD [p. backyard]

produced by triple gemini (soundcloud.com/trplgmni)

something else left to say here
i don't know what
everyday left to change pace in the dark
holding out for the first time that we go back straight through
the streetlights from the backseat of the car
and i'm deeper again
i pour it straight and its days gone
you couldn't notice and then (couldn't notice again)
i think i'm losing myself (think i'm losing myself)
and i don't know how to tell you when its over
could you hide it from the start?

you don't even speak like you know me
straight laying down what you taking out of me slowly
first time on the first night, you're my only
but its so dark, but its so cold
but its lonely

do you think its the same thing
or you think that its gone?
cause its only worth saving
if its you that i've got
and i know that the waiting
gets inside of your thoughts
and the time that its taking
makes it feel like its wrong

thought that we'd do it again on the same street
making nightmares out of daydreams
june as cold as my face feels
but its easier when you hate me
i just always thought it was safe here

and i don't know how to tell you when its over
could you hide it from the start?

tell me again how it gets in your head
i'm just leaving its better this way
i'm just a second away
i'm just a second away
what would you call that?

read through the texts, do you wonder instead
why i'm making it easy again?
i'm just a second away
saw how it ends when you stay
and i wish we could fall back

you don't even speak like you know me
straight laying down what you taking out of me slowly
first time on the first night, you're my only
but its so dark, but its so cold
but its lonely

Somewhere Else (prod. triple gemini)

prod. beats by hills

run him for the gram
run him for the price
run him for the day
that he said he wasnt nice
i got redeyes
you a bad type
you should know like
we could roll up
we could spark up
we dont care for ya
i hope yall know
im just a god
im made of diamonds
and resin
and larde
run him for the gram
run him for the price
run him for the day
that he said he wasnt nice

u said i switched up
nah now i just smoke swishas
im blacked out by my sister
now now i do not i miss her
you said ur fine
u can say ur not fine
can i say im not fine
im fucking fine
fuckin a okay
im just tryn find my way thru dis
copped a brand new knife 
wit a brand new ruger
yeh i might cut ur bitch
theres a sharp pain shooting thru my chest
i dont wanna try to get rest
no switchups
no bad times yeah
i cant stand to see myself
no good luck
but no bad vibes either
my tempers kinda short 
but im tryna be nicer
the vibes lately 
are teen titans go
the vibe lately 
is i just dont know
i wanna explore my mind so bad..

run him for the gram
run him for the price
run him for the day
that he said he wasnt nice
i got redeyes
you a bad type
you should know like
we could roll up
we could spark up
we dont care for ya
i hope yall know
im just a god
im made of diamonds
and resin
and larde
run him for the gram
run him for the price
that boy say he tuff
but i think he just a mice

i got everything i ever wanted
but im still looking for a different pointment 
u know everything inside ur minds a okay until it isnt
if u got money then go spend it dont be lacking like kai cenat
u think u tough like a brick wall but ive seen more than u
sorry for the time i took i was tryn find a way to mortar u
im just tryna help you get away
im just tryna help myself c-
but i fucking cant!
aye!
dont talk shit if you dont fucking mean it 
dont call me if i dont care
obviously you know when i dont care

3 4 5 6 7 8 9
bitch wanna fight but i truly dont mind
u got me an i got u 
why are we doomed if its i love you? >:(
3 4 5 6 7 8 9 
BITCH WANNA FIGHT BUT I TRULY DONT MIND
U GOT ME AND I GOT U
WHY ARE WE DOOMED IF ITS I LOVE YOU?
run him for the gram
run him for the price
run him for the day
that he said he wasnt nice
i got redeyes
you a bad type
you should know like
we could roll up
we could spark up
we dont care for ya
i hope yall know
im just a god
im made of diamonds
and resin
and larde
run him for the gram
run him for the price
run him for the day
that he said he wasnt nice

lepidoptera

As far as I can take
As long as I've been waiting
I know it goes away
When you're gone

Waking up on the east side
But I don't know what to feel
Thinking of when you'd hold me 
The safest I'd ever been
And you don't know that you fixed me
And I don't know if you care 
So I don't think that I'll tell you
To let you know that I'm here

Things hold and things decay
I've always felt the same 
My hand against your cheek
To see you face from under your hair
I hope you know that I listened 
I'm holding onto it still
And when I know that it's over
The only thing that I'll miss

So don't get close to me 
And don't say anything
Cause with your voice so clear
I know it's over here

Wait for a break in the morning
Ask me to stay it's important
I've had these feelings before it
Spoke out to me in the forest
I put a name to a context like
All of this time and we lost it
But I just retreat where the fog is
Just know that I loved you through all this

The last trace of my body's been gone now
The best days of your life I don't know how
The last chance I could tell you but I still can't
The lights dimming but its painless you should know that

Don't get close to me 
And don't say anything
Cause with your voice so clear
I know it's over here

If It Still Matters

prod. tracyxo x joshbae

see me blowing rainbows
i dont care bout you hoes
im on my ten toes
ran around this dome
(if we're talking bout it,)

i dont give no shit about a ciggarette pack
i dont care about frozen time
uh huh?
i dont care about golden why?'s
uh huh
this shit bothers me
i dont wanna deal with the shit in my head
i just wanna smoke white runtz till im dead
thoughts come up from the bottom of my mind
aye, i gotta climb back up, i gotta wake up
i dont wanna be late!
i dont know what to say :(
i dont wanna be anyone i try and replicate
5:00 am, waste of time, oh my god..
6:00 am, and im tired as fuck

it still wont wake me up
thc in my gut
faded or nothing bruh
this preroll is all for us
we're living like we're still dumb
who am i kidding?
no one does it better than you.
no one will bother me anymore
dont lie
dont try
dont cry to me anymore
i painted the walls exactly like i wanted to
the stripes i made were pink and blue for you
will you be okay..?

(you were only a momment away)

dont, even bother
coming back.
im sorry,
but im not.
I'M TIRED OF THIS COLD WAR!
I'M TRYNA HELP MYSELF AGAIN!
I'M TRYNA BE ANYONE

up,
i gotta wake up ')
DONT WANNA BE LATE
I DONT WANNA BE ANYONE I TRY TO REPLICATE
FIVE AM WASTE OF TIME OH MY GOD
SIX AM AND IM TIRED AS FUCK
AND DONT WANNA WAKE UP.
ah...
ah...
can you run that by me once again :(?
ah..
ah
i dont know, how else i will-
(find some comfort in my home again)
THIS ROCKING CHAIR DONT FEEL THE SAME
THE PORTRAIT FELL AND SOMETHINGS CHANGED

the portrait fell, & something changed

prod @fleshgolem x @jolst
mix & mastr @fleshgolem

4th single on alb

lyrics

no name
looking in th mirror see the wrong face 
picking up the shards till i feel something
im a noone but im still something
so what th fuck am i doing here…oneway 

or another im find ima find a fucking 
something 
mayb already found it on this one way
but this line that i been takings a very closed space
im on my own pace

im running dropping seeds in forest
the crowd that ignores. wakes from their break
and they use all their force to take and just break
and i wait and i wait for the day 
they’re the same.

am i sane. am i sane
i grew up how i was supposed but im the one has to change
u make it obvious that im wrong coz u think i live for the pain 
do u not c i hold restrain 
its in the back of ur mind im sure 
but youll still look away

make me why i am then put me to the torch
first a threat but then the threat leads to a fucking war 
its the end of our time coz we form our source
i feel like an alien the way u react. am i speaking morse

contemplating on a fucking porch
look to the sky and u will stay on course
time moves slow when u dont want it to but thats just when find ur force

no name

no name (flesh x jolst)

www.carlbymusic.com
Production, mixing, mastering & additional vocals by @horoshavibes
Additional guitars by @jolst

LYRICS
Call me if you need a friend
Or someone with whom to smoke cigarettes
I’ve got the time and an ear to lend
I’m always here if you need to vent
On your worst days
When you’re down bad
When the world makes you feel so small and irrelevant
I’ll be there for you
It may not be a lot
But it’s all that I can do

I’ll let you borrow my jacket
And my full attention
You know you can have it
The world is yours so just reach out and grab it
I hope you never feel that your dreams are invalid

‘Cause that's what friends are for
It may not be a lot
Oh I wish I could do more
For you
Just know I’m giving all I got in spite of what I’m going through so

two decades worth of retribution - pg 32 (message to bears)

maesk

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