I been waiting for this for what feels like ages

yo music one of the things that keep me alive bruh

treading water got too difficult
i don't click with residuals
from straight out of their cubicles
there's something strangely beautiful
bout living here in this filth
after all the imitators are done and dusted
he still maybe might live
treading water got too difficult
i don't click with residuals
from straight out of their cubicles
there's something strangely beautiful
bout living here in this filth
after all the imitators are done and dusted
he still maybe might live

every song
that u get
is a piece
of my health
puppet strings control me
so for them make something else
she could kill me yet again
and this corpse would only sputter
this hope turns to
waiting for the waves to pull me under

treading water got too difficult
i don't click with residuals
from straight out of their cubicles
there's something strangely beautiful
bout living here in this filth
after all the imitators are done and dusted
he still maybe might live
treading water got too difficult
i don't click with residuals
from straight out of their cubicles
there's something strangely beautiful
bout living here in this filth
after all the imitators are done and dusted
he still maybe might live

i simply need someone's affection
but we could have phone sex
she says without idling
we store
idealized versions of eachother
in our heads
in our heads

i simply need someone's affection
but we could have phone sex
she says without idling
we store
idealized versions of eachother
in our heads
in our heads

treading water got too difficult
i don't click with residuals
from straight out of their cubicles
there's something strangely beautiful
bout living here in this filth
after all the imitators are done and dusted
he still maybe might live
treading water got too difficult
i don't click with residuals
from straight out of their cubicles
there's something strangely beautiful
bout living here in this filth
after all the imitators are done and dusted
he still maybe might live

residuals (afterlife x jolst)

7/28/22
prod. @everythingmackk

i've sent too many sorries
and my phone is gonna die soon
i should've learned something
at least more than a thing or two
like what is worth to a person
who cherishes the dirt on their shoes
do i turn a blind eye to my own cries?
or fear the rest of my youth

cause i don't wanna force who i am
as i pour another cup, with trembling hands
over half of my life's being made without plans
i get it; if i made a choice, 
i'd surely regret it
but most of all my worries,
i can't fit them in the pensmanship
you simply wouldn't get it
even if you really listening
the center of my soul don't only glow
it's also glistening
my demons start to part as i'm
pouring the nitroglycerin

it only feels like i'm here when i'm
stun-locked in third gear, and a 
dozen million miles away from reality
i hope forever ain't forever
unless it has to be
cause i don't wanna go out in misery
let go, of whatever this meant to me
fuck that
imma go on a killing spree

emma, i'm sorry for everything.

it's my fault you let me go
met in the seventh grade
we went separate roads
cause of some stupid shit i'd say
i just tore up all my clothes
courtesy of missing your face
if i finally break this mold
i'll thank you some day

i've sent too many sorries
and my phone is gonna die soon
i should've learned something
at least more than a thing or two
like what is worth to a person
who cherishes the dirt on their shoes
do i turn a blind eye to my own cries?
or fear the rest of my youth

this ain't just a knack
it's a passion
double shame on you 
for thinking all i do is actin'
part of me is straight
the rest is being held captive
living in a cavern where arachnids and bats been
constantly refracting

yeah, but i'm not worried about it
i'm entangled in this string
tryna gnaw my way out it
you had liked a post of mine 
a while back when i doubted
if i was truly good for nothing
based on how low the clouds been...

clouds to crows

clouds to crows [prod. mackk]

cover art by my mother 

all the songs in the flesh alb r jus gone be released as singles

sewerperson "lights r on but no ones home" covered in the song

mix & mastr @fleshgolem
lyrics

fillin up th cup 
i feel my body start to ache
evrything telling me to stop
even see th walls starting to cave
and they love it, a body piled function
don’t wanna cause fussing but it’s building up coz every day i see my grave

this aint who i am
but ima act like this is why i am 
my perspective starts to change in where i stand, looking out th window pane
look i dont blame u for thinking im not keen staying 
but i dont hav a plan, anywhere on this dirt feels same

sink to the floor, coz it’s the norm, 
don’t u touch my skin
it’s all been stored, i’m now reborn
coz i can dump my things
yelling fuck it, pressing on my stomach
i can feel it coming but i’m not fucking stopping
 till i’m turned out in 

look at my face, see my state i jus kno ur confused 
i need space, cannot wait let’s take a break on the moon
i’m in pain, still in shock, lost in thought and i’m bruised
u saw me thru th glass and then just left me bleeding out in this hotel room

i saw the lights on but i knew that no one else was home
look at the nikon and check the camera roll, i'm all alone
feel the bottle pop, spew it out, opening in the mouth
i'm a cyclops when it comes to seeing no one else
okay, okay

i feel my ears pop when i take the lift up to the spot
in the function, sipping on this ace and rolling pot
i'ma punch in, even when i'm geeked, i'm on the clock
like a pumpkin, i'm lit up and my body start to rot

i'm an asshole, okay, well, i know, so you can leave
what's the point, though, in coming to the function if you cheesed?
i'm in street clothes but my guys in masks and they don't ski
i don't need throat, i just need a girl who proud of me, okay

know i act tough i just need someone to see i’m not ok
the whole domineer off i’ma just leave it to fate
cut my feelings off coz that mean i’m not suffering the same
sure it isn’t real but when i smile i still feel sane

i still feel sane, but mostly when im on a subs
get apifannys that turns my wants in to musts
i get a lot dreams but w my habits theyre all stuck 
i got these goals but w these habits theyre all fucked

i'm an asshole, okay, well, i know, so you can leave
what's the point, though, in coming to the function if you cheesed?
i'm in street clothes but my guys in masks and they don't ski
i don't need throat, i just need a girl who proud of me, okay

lights r on

lights r on (flesh)

people keep telling me i'm a guardin clone, so here's this in spite to start off 2024 :)

Lyrics:

like where did all my friends go?
where'd the passion all go
writing private in my bed hoe
rip a verse out of my chest woah
i ain't feelin the best so
i subdue all the stress
left behind and i can't cope
make a new scene all on my own
all on my own

like where did all my friends go?
where'd the passion all go
writing private in my bed hoe
rip a verse out of my chest woah
i ain't feelin the best so
i subdue all the stress
left behind and i can't cope
make a new scene all on my own
all on my own

she could read minds in the first place
she could read minds in the worst way
that means she should know that i can't stay :(
that means she should know this ain't my day
spent my whole life chasing first place
somehow i'm 5th wheeling on my birthday
taco bell 3am on a thursday
wish i could share it with you come to my place
ay
double stack chicken wrap yuh
ay
babygirl where you at love :(
crush up 9 grams gurl i'm terrified
still i'm feeling alright this deep in your eyes 

like where did all my friends go
where'd the passion all go
writing private in my bed hoe
rip a verse out of my chest woah
i ain't feelin the best so
i subdue all the stress
left behind and i can't cope- 

YUH

like where did all my friends go
where'd the passion all go
writing private in my bed hoe
rip a verse out of my chest woah
i ain't feelin the best so
i subdue all the stress
left behind and i can't cope
make a new scene all on my own
all on my own

solitary (dash)

prod. clear purple x maybe
@clearpurple

fuck on my lip wit a blunt
and baby u roll when i cut 
like why do you think im luv
shit is rough
muddy cup fillin sludge
fuckers call me they brother
barely know you that much

know i come off codependent 
i just want love and let in
break this soul i’d let you dead it
said home is where ur headed
i feel like i’ve never met it
still slitting paths of velvet
picture frame with shattered lessons
got me second guessing everybody, patterns second
after life come death, well i dont think that i accept it
just a coward little bastard, fearing countless changes 
with how im climbing them you’d think my mind is fucking everest
and even if i kill myself im sorry honest
shizu never wanted problems, but my songs adore it
so this leaking heart can bleed throughout the art its forming
take a breath, to telling everyone ur living for it
have mercy on me

fuck on my lip wit a blunt
and baby u roll when i cut 
like why do you think im luv
shit is rough
muddy cup fillin sludge
fuckers call me they brother
barely know you that much

follow spotify!

sludge (clear purple)

https://open.spotify.com/album/0bJh1YQSw6Rk94DK3hiNtG?si=EPAP1Mm1SuKkJY954x3qkg

https://linktr.ee/lottaheart

produced by @metlast
mastered by @jolst

lyrics:

(I know how we'd end,
right from the beginning
i waited at the bus stop,
just hoping you'd get home)

she said she was falling, i said hang tight
just hold onto me, i'll be your lifeline
i won't let you go like it's the last time
need you in my life so you cant die
[x2]

this can't be our last day
there can't be another way
i'm holding on for you to stay
don't know what i'd do,
nor would i know what to say if i,

lost you and you never could come back again
without you i don't even know what's happening
as you slip i can feel my world crashing in
i love you and you don't even know the half of it

so don't fall, hold on
i swear that i'll do everything i have to do
cause you're all that i want
and if you let go i'm jumping after you

i just needed you to know,
i won't ever let you go
i just needed you to know,
i won't let you die alone

she said she was falling, i said hang tight
just hold onto me, i'll be your lifeline
i won't let you go like it's the last time
need you in my life so you cant die
[x2]

lifeline

there's better ways to go about the pain you feel today
everybody knows that I would put you in your place
scarfing down that alcohol a smile on your face
it breaks my heart to see you like this I don't think I can stay

anyway 
anymore
your falling out the door
you're screaming at me telling me that its my fault you're a whore
don't give you what you need just always searching for some more
the truth is, you couldn't settle, its all your fault you know

breaking my heart
its always me to blame
doing some coke
on the weekend at your place
with your friends
or so called friends I feel ashamed
I don't know the truth no more its hard to stay awake

there's better ways to go about the pain you feel today
everybody knows that I would put you in your place
scarfing down that alcohol a smile on your face
it breaks my heart to see you like this I don't think I can stay

anyway 
anymore
your falling out the door
you're screaming at me telling me that its my fault you're a whore
don't give you what you need just always searching for some more
the truth is, you couldn't settle, its all your fault you know

break it out
and break it in
run away
from your sins
you're stuck in your ways
you're family is to blame
they raised you like in idiot, I hope you'll be okay

i dont think i can stay (prod. fantasy camp)

as the trees decay and their color fades
ill stop reminiscing yesterdays
baby take me somewhere keep me safe
if you hate me say it to my face

i tried my best n fucked it all up
will u be there for me when im all done
ill shatter my veins and drain all my blood
just to keep you safe is that good enough

is that good enough for you
ill try oh i always do
why do i try for you
baby id die for you 

i feel ugly dont u dare to even look at me
im addicted to ur touch like it was nicotine
i could never find another soul to care for me
this a long n winding road plz tread it carefullly

i tried my best n fucked it all up
will u be there for me when im all done
ill shatter my veins and drain all my blood
just to keep you safe is that good enough

is that good enough for you
ill try oh i always do
why do i try for you
baby id die for you

ⁱ ᵗʳⁱᵉᵈ ᵐʸ ᵇᵉˢᵗ ⁿ ᶠᵘᶜᵏᵉᵈ ⁱᵗ ᵃˡˡ ᵘᵖ
ʷⁱˡˡ ᵘ ᵇᵉ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ ᶠᵒʳ ᵐᵉ ʷʰᵉⁿ ⁱᵐ ᵃˡˡ ᵈᵒⁿᵉ
ⁱˡˡ ˢʰᵃᵗᵗᵉʳ ᵐʸ ᵛᵉⁱⁿˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵈʳᵃⁱⁿ ᵃˡˡ ᵐʸ ᵇˡᵒᵒᵈ
ʲᵘˢᵗ ᵗᵒ ᵏᵉᵉᵖ ʸᵒᵘ ˢᵃᶠᵉ ⁱˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵍᵒᵒᵈ ᵉⁿᵒᵘᵍʰ

i dont think i can stay (prod. fantasy camp)

NAVYXOWER

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