Personality Hacker

Personal Growth

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In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about creating a family mantra for the year.

In this podcast you’ll find:

The purpose of this podcast is to broadcast and share information on how you can use your own mind building skills/talents which will make you a happy person and be the best version of you.

Part of these podcast is to make sure we’re engaged with our audience.

Three primary areas we deal with:

YOU
As the largest leverage in your life, we help transform you into a happier and better version of yourself.
    
YOU AND YOUR RELATIONSHIPS 
Your relationship with your family and friends and personality of the one’s you’re close with.

CAREER & BUSINESS
What is the direction you’re going and who are you going to work with?
    
We came up with a family mantra and we’re calling it with the year of abundant self-reliance. We retrospectively determined how our previous years were. We watched ourselves grow and it primed us to be a lot more aware.
    
Concept of yearlong mantra – This can be for your personal life, business, community, whatever, you can create a mantra for the year.
    
Don’t feel locked in when choosing your mantra and feel free to define it to what make sense to you, make sure you understand what it means to you. If there’s no specificity, it will be challenging for you to achieve it.

Exercise we recommend in this podcast:

Tell us what your annual mantra is for the coming year. Ask yourself, what has been my theme for the last three years and think about what is it you’d like for this year to be? What are the big goals?


Setting Intentions With A Family Mantra | PODCAST 0001

In this podcast Joel and Antonia discuss pain vs suffering and unpack the difference.

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In this podcast on pain vs suffering you’ll find:

    This podcast will discuss the difference between pain and suffering.
    Pain is inevitable and suffering is optional. You can stay with it or continue experiencing it.
    The base root of pain is physical warning that there’s something damaging. Pleasure is a reward mechanism for doing something that the body believe is healthy
    Pain is not always a bad thing. We experience something we assume is bad for our body.
    The difference between pain and suffering is the narrative behind it.
    When you over attach to your ego, it becomes righteously indignant.
    The only thing you can do is to be the absolute version of yourself. You want to spend the majority of your time with people who has the same value as yours. But it’s near impossible for you to prevent meeting people who choose to suffer every day.
    Being awesome is a great influence to others. When people see your progress and happiness, they will be inspired to make or initiate changes in their lives.


Pain vs Suffering | PODCAST 0002

In this podcast Antonia & Joel talk about “flow” and how it relates to your personality.

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In this podcast you’ll find:

    What makes an experience genuinely fulfilling is a state of consciousness called ‘flow’.
    Written by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, he uses 4 or 5 different criteria in which doing the activity gives you energy as opposed to taking energy away. In flow, the activity feels like we’re powered with a self-energizing battery.
    In order to discover what your flow is, ask yourself what is it that you love to do so much the only reason you stop is when you’re exhausted?
    Some people know how to access their flow instantly.
    There are different things that can put people in flow. Flow feels very kinesthetic.
    Each personality type has a predictable flow state.
    Knowing your flow state means knowing which mental process your brain favors above others.
    ENPs are difficult to get into flow. The exploration process has you seeing relationships that other people don’t.
    Some people only experience flow when they know they don’t have distractions.
    Knowing when and how you get into flow can explain a lot about your behavior and patterns.


Finding Flow | PODCAST 0004

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about how to use the feedback from others for personal development.

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In this podcast you’ll find:

    Feedback is the willingness to accept information that the world gives us in order to respond and get the best results possible.
    Our resistance to receiving feedback we don’t like is often our ego being triggered.
    We see ourselves as better than we really are, and that’s a good thing. Confidence makes up for a multitude of sins.
    We rely on confidence so much that when the world gives us feedback to shake it, our ego can become distressed that we no longer have confidence to fall back upon.
    When we ignore feedback, we don’t give ourselves an opportunity to improve.
    When people are convinced they’re right, they especially ignore feedback.
    Listening to feedback doesn’t mean that you only listen to sources you deem credible or that you agree with.
    Giving feedback too much credence can also be dangerous. Individuals can be reflecting their subjective perspective, not necessarily ‘reality’.
    Feedback comes from both the ‘inner world’ and the ‘outer world’.  We need a healthy balance of both.
    Introverts have a tendency to tune out feedback that doesn’t resonant with their inner world. This is great for dealing with nay-sayers, but not for changing course when needed.
    Extraverts, on the other hand, are more sensitive to outer world feedback but not to their internal feedback.
    “The best feedback is something that threatens a dearly held belief.”
    When our beliefs are challenged, we start to act like addicts for the belief(s).
    All growth happens in discomfort, so we have to be willing to accept uncomfortable feedback.
    Cognitive dissonance is when we experience stress because we are holding two opposing beliefs. We can avoid feedback because we don’t want to experience cognitive dissonance, but we need to be okay with feedback that may threaten a precious belief and remember “the way out is through.” There’s a part of you listening, anyway.
    Feedback will always challenge what you think, feel and where you stand.

Exercises we recommend in this podcast:

Make a list of between one and three pieces of feedback that make you feel the most uncomfortable (angry, frustrated, ashamed, sad, or makes you squirm). It will feel horrible, but your biggest growth is tied to that feedback. Even if you end up not agreeing with the feedback, exploring it is high leverage for self-understanding.

Feedback That Makes You Squirm | PODCAST 0010

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the idea that what your thinker thinks – your prover will prove.

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In this podcast you’ll find:

    The mind is divided into 2 parts: the Thinker and the Prover
    The Thinker’s job is to come up with a reality; this can be extremely complex
    The Prover’s job is simple – prove the Thinker’s reality (it’s a ‘dutiful servant’)
    Can I change my reality just by changing how I think?
    How useful is a belief?
    Everyone is on autopilot; by the time you get to a decision, you already made that decision 10 decisions ago
    We can show our biases simply by focusing on some information over others
    The best we can do is ‘pre-program the GPS’
    How responsible are you for your actions?
    How we decide to program our minds and whether or not we choose to outsource our beliefs will have major impact
    “The easiest way to be brainwashed is to be born.”


What The Thinker Thinks – The Prover Proves | PODCAST 0011

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about making scary changes in your life when you are ready to “scale up” in personal development.

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In this podcast you’ll find:

    Talking about ‘scale up’ moments, which are scary even if we know it would be good for us.
    The character Neo in the move “The Matrix” is a great example of letting go of others expectations and scaling up by resting into his own sense of integrity.
    We face moments when we realize ‘what got us here won’t get us there’.
    Transitions aren’t just scary, they’re also painful.
    Based on ancient programming, a part of us fears that if we fail after the transition we’ll literally die.
    The scariest part isn’t the transition; it’s the initial decision of making big change.
    The transition is usually more frustration and painful. You have to pick up new skills and one learns things about themselves that may not be flattering.
    When we finish the process, we almost always look back and say “That wasn’t so bad.”
    A helpful model is the HAT model – Healing, Achievement and Transcendence.
    When we’re scaling up, we’re putting more pressure through the ‘pipe’ and more cracks are exposed. We mistake this new self-understanding with a belief that we’re broken and not ready for the next level.
    Going through the transition is what exposed the cracks in the first place, so it’s all a healthy part of the process.
    Once you get to the next ‘vine’ you feel so accomplished.
    It’s easy to blame outside circumstances to mask the fear of scaling up, or to believe that no one will help you during the process.
    Alternatively, it’s healthier to see oneself as responsible for transitions and also find mentors and coaches to help during the process.
    It takes balls and determination and persistence to make big changes in life.
    Some have the problem of being in transition too much and have trouble sticking with just one thing, which can be its own challenge.
    Having the strength often comes by doing the thing you’re madly in love with doing.
    It’s important to really know what you want, and avoid ‘counterfeit’ desires.
    Some people end up in ‘satellite’ careers – something close to their heart’s desire, but one step removed.
    Surrounding yourself with people who are already where you want to go helps you get to your end game faster, and proves it can be done with ‘dying’.
    It’s also important not to mistake lateral change with vertical growth.
    Being able to make big transitions is the first step toward playing a Bigger Game.
    Familiarity can keep one in bad, sometimes dangerous, situations.
    All growth happens out of our comfort zone, so comfort isn’t always our friend.


Making Scary Changes In Your Life | PODCAST 0013

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about crafting personal rules for your life that empower you and avoiding the ones that disempower.

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In this podcast you’ll find:

    Personal Rules are rules that we create ourselves and inform how we believe reality should work.
    Personal Rules are not real rules unless you discover that it does make you feel bad. You will identify whether it’s a personal rule based on its effect.
    There are also personal rules that we are conscious of. You may not be aware of your personal rules until the emotion has brought it up to you.
    All upsets are rules upsets. If we are feeling bad, it’s not because someone made us feel bad but because our personal rules are offended. If we’re aware of the rules inside us, we have the power and capability to change them.
    A rule is what has to happen in order for us to feel good.
    Rules are shortcuts for our brains to give a sense of certainty about consequences for actions to make lightning quick decisions. In order make quick decisions that will lead us to our desirable consequences, we start to create rules that will get us to that feeling.
    When a rule comes in to your life, it’s a way for your make a decision which makes things faster so you can get through life.
    We have more rules that can easily be offended than rules than are open frame. Most of us have a lot of rules that we don’t want. Be aware of your rules. Ask yourself whether it is a bad or an empowering rule.
    Knowing what your rules are and crafting them in a way that makes you feel good, increases our happiness.
    Be clear in communicating what your rules are.
    3 different components to a disempowering rule.

    A disempowering rule is impossible to meet and it’s going to make you feel bad all the time.
    What you can’t control determines whether the rule has been met – Outside circumstance have to fall into place in order your personal rule to be met. You don’t have control whether or not the rule happens.
    It gives only a few ways to feel good and lots of ways to feel bad. Things have to happen in an exact way in order for a rule to be honoured.

    Hierarchy of rules.

    Threshold Rules – Rules that we will never break and define us.
    Personal Standards – Rules that we don’t like to break.

    If your disempowering rules are populating your threshold rules, you feel unhappy because you are unable to meet to meet them.
    Being right may seem like what makes us really happy but real happiness comes from being willing to re-evaluate.
    Feel free to put much time and effort when designing your rules.
    The most empowering rule is to enjoy yourself no matter what happens.
    The person who is adaptable and flexible tend to gain the outcome they desire because they aren’t attached to specifics.
    Let us know what some of your personal rules are and what it takes to have empowering happiness producing rules. Please feel free to leave your comments below.


Empowering Personal Rules | PODCAST 0026

In this episode Joel and Antonia answer the question “What is intuition?”

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In this podcast you’ll find:

    What is Intuition? Intuition is a pretty abstract word. It’s something many of us rely on for quick judgments and often life-altering decisions.
    Intuition is a particular way that people learn information.
    There are two ways in which people learn new information.

    Through their 5 senses.
    Intuition – not relying on those senses in order to understand and learn new information. Therefore, relying on advanced pattern recognition.

    You can’t directly interact behind the curtain, but you can deduce what’s going on behind the curtain based on the pieces of information you get in front of the curtain.
    Sensory people are looking to find something that’s reliable and can be verified.
    Intuitives are not dependent on things that are reliable. Someone who’s using intuition to learn puts more emphasis on speed of information and depth of insight on information. They will sacrifice verifiability for speed and depth of insight.
    Intuitives are more comfortable with speculation and so they’re willing to take risks. Eventually, they’re going to become more and more proficient with it.
    When it comes to pattern recognition and speculation, intuitives are getting better of taking risks and accurate speculations.
    Although sensors may have an intuitive piece on them, they don’t become efficient with it because they’re not comfortable with its nature and process.
    75% of the population in the US are sensory and only 25% are Intuitives.
    Everyone is creative. We all have a creative element inside of us. Some of the most creative people use a sensory as a form of learning.
    The greatest artists in the world are sensors. The big difference is that Intuitives have a tendency to create something the world has never seen because they’re looking for things that can only be imagined. Sensors on the other hand, when they’re creative, have a tendency to make something new that already has a sensory platform.
    There’s no argument that both are valid ways of learning.
    Some people tend to hide their being intuitive. The Intuitives who keep going are so powerful that they end up being the people who are most celebrated.
    If you are of an intuitive learning style, the first step is to accept it. The second step is understanding its potential and doing what you can to hone it.
    Take courage, give yourself permission and you’re going to see a more different world.


What Is Intuition | PODCAST 0029

In this episode Joel and Antonia explain the difference between Introverted Intuition and Extraverted Intuition.

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In this podcast you’ll find:

    Intuition is an effectively advanced pattern recognition. It is a learning style basically speculating the train of thought following what’s behind the curtain.
    Intuitives are not the majority so the world is not designed for them.
    People who have sensory learning styles aren’t comfortable speculating. They want more information to be safe and secure.
    We don’t have enough explanation why some people see the world profoundly
    Everyone uses intuition to some degree.
    Intuition isn’t judgmental. Its nature is really just trying to understand what’s happening behind the curtain.
    Inside us, our intuition is working in conjunction with our mind’s ability to evaluate the information it takes in. All by itself, intuition is totally non-judgemental. It’s simply a process of learning.
    2 types of intuition: Introverted vs Extraverted Intuition
    Introverted Intuitive Style = Perspective. Perspectives have the ability to watch their own minds form a pattern. When they hear people talk or do something, their mind will shift into the other person’s perspective and get a sense of what’s going on.
    Perspective users oftentimes don’t reveal this kind of genius. They almost have the ability to predict future events.
    In perspectives, you are able to see how large groups of people are going to react.
    The process of learning takes some time to develop. Perspectives are very easy to be distracted. It’s almost like a fragile process sometimes. If there’s a lot of sensory input, it’s hard to stay focused because it’s a fragile process.
    When working on problem, they wouldn’t know how they arrived at the solution. If they get distracted, they might never be able to pick up the trail again.
    Out of the 25%, only 10% are using perspectives.
    Perspective people tend to have a lot of one sided relationships and so they have very unique needs.
    Because they don’t have that many people who understand how it works, it’s difficult for them to rise up to become better version of themselves.
    Extraverted Intuition = Exploration. Unlike perspectives who are slow paced, exploration on the other hand, is more about exploring the world and understanding patterns on the outside world. They tend to be very interactive and engaging.
    They’re able to understand the connections and relationships to things that other people don’t. It’s about new connections.
    Intuition is interested in speed of information and depth of insight. Both types of intuition do this but Exploration is more inclined to speed of information and Perspectives likes the depth of insights.
    The world needs both styles of intuition. Without this, we would actually stagnate.
    The more you give yourself permission and make your intuition more powerful and strong, you could be truly unstoppable in making great things.


Introverted Intuition vs Extraverted Intuition | PODCAST 0030

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the importance of finding intuition mentors who can help guide you in your personal development journey.

In this podcast you’ll find:

    This podcast episode talks about finding intuition mentors who can help you in your personal growth.
    Mentorship can help you accomplish what you want to achieve faster
    People/mentors matter in your life. An intuitive that grows in an environment without an intuitive mentor can get pretty unhealthy.
    It’s not just embracing your intuition and acknowledging it, it’s about recognizing that no matter who you are, you can be at various levels of health.
    If someone can come along and help guide Intuitives with their potential, it can make all the difference in their lives.
    A healthy intuitive can be a huge positive force that can make a great impact to the world. They realize who they really are and they are eager to grow.
    Health is an expression of not being totally self-consumed.
    The healthier we get, the more we’re able to see outside ourselves.
    If you don’t have a mentor you can support you, then it’s time to look for one who can support and massively change you.
    What/Who are intuition mentors?
    Intuition mentors don’t necessarily be physically in your life.
    Mentorship can come through time-binding, a hero and from people you’re intimate with.
    Intuitives have the tendency to use books and characters in TV shows as mentors.
    Health happens concurrently with growth. Most people are at an average of health and are not in abundance.
    In order to get to a healthy phase or level, you should be willing to question who you are and what you’re made of.
    With intuition comes ambition of wanting to make something significant.
    There’s a lot of mentors out there for Intuitives. Figure out the kind of mentorship you’re looking for at this phase in your life.

Finding Intuition Mentors | PODCAST 0032

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about developing an intuition action plan.

In this podcast you’ll find:

3 important components that an intuitive can introduce to their life when developing intuition in order to be at their happiest:

    You and your intuition
    Your intuition and other people
    Your intuition and what you do in the world

You and your intuition (Personal level: How it impacts you as a person)

    Become the healthiest version of yourself as you can be.
    Self permission and self acceptance is the baseline.
    After acceptance, learn to navigate through the world and manage that component. Once done in a positive way, it makes an intuitive amazingly healthy.
    There is a need to manage intuitive energy based on your intuitive type. Make sure to do things that feel natural to you.
    For example, avoid small talks if it doesn’t come naturally for you unless the return is high and it is being done for the benefit of others.
    Make sure to do things that exercises your intuitive energy.
    If your job, family or people close to you sap your intuitive energy, do baby steps to redefine your position and slowly take your intuitive needs met.

Your intuition and other people around you

    How do you make your way through the world wherein most people learn information and think differently from you?
    Usually, once Intuitives recognize who they are, they think they are better than most people but that doesn’t increase their personal happiness.
    They need to understand that they have unique abilities that most people don’t but a part of the world needs filling in.
    They should learn to appreciate non-intuitive people (people who have Sensory learning style); what they give to the world. Giving permission to others to be who they are doesn’t mean they will give permission for you to be who you really are.
    Only you can give that permission which is self sovereignty. It is not about fairness but fundamentally on happiness. Don’t emanate resentment if the favor is not returned.
    Learn how to blend and be healthy. This  gives opportunity to express to other people one’s intuitive difference from others.
    Make sure you are having relationships with other Intuitives as well.

Your intuition and what you do in the world

    How to extend the gifts you have as an intuitive?
    Foundational needs should be met first and that includes personal relationships.
    Realization. You might be doing what you were always told that you “should do” than what is really in your heart and mind.R
    Redirection. You reapply all skills you have learned to whatever you love.
    Progression of passion, purpose and mission. Passion is the starting point. Doing the thing you love and maybe using it in earning a living. This graduates to purpose; how to keep doing the thing you love and also impact the world in a positive way? Then it becomes a mission.
    An awareness of a purpose and a strong will to make a movement that could change or lead to more positive things. Play with options and see what happens.

Exercises we recommend in this podcast

    Write down the 5 things that gives you energy as an intuitive. What is it that builds into your intuition?
    Think abbot the ways you can communicate your intuition, ways you can hold space and relate to them on your terms if they don’t think like you do.


Developing An Intuition Action Plan | PODCAST 0033

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the introvert advantage in a world that is becoming more and more extraverted.

In this podcast on the introvert advantage you’ll find:

    Introversion gets a lot of misunderstanding. People in general have a lot of confusion about introversion and extraversion.
    Do introverts have a disadvantage in this world? Do they have issues that are very unique to them?
    There are a lot of great performers that are introverts who can perform and speak very well.
    In business, life and social circles, people are expected to be extroverts. Public speaking, for example, is a challenge for some people.
    Introverts need time to be alone in order to recover their energy while extraverts get their energy by being in the environment and interacting with people.
    Energy is being managed differently by introverts and extraverts.
    Introverts – Inner world is the real world. When the outer world isn’t mirroring their inner world experience, they reconcile both worlds which takes too much energy.
    Extraverts – Outer world is the real world. Spending too much time alone drains their energy. In order to understand what’s really going on, they have to go outside of themselves.
    The outer world doesn’t specifically have to be people.
    When you understand people at a profound level, you can see and understand where they are coming from.
    Introverts have a great advantage to grow than extraverts.
    If you are an introvert, developing your extraverted process is the path to growth.
    Extraverts may find it more comfortable to live in an over communicated world, but it’s not helping them to develop their introverted process.
    Introverts need time to think and consider what they have to say.
    Every single personality type has a breakdown of 8 mental processes. 2 of these processes are the preferred way of navigating the world which balances human beings.
    Not all kinds extraversion is equal for all personality types. It helps if you know your personality type and the style of extraversion that is the growth path for your personality type.
    One of the best thing you can do to begin your personal growth journey is to know your personality. Knowing what kind of extraversion you’re going to grow as introvert is powerful.

The Introvert Advantage | PODCAST 0042

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the difference between modesty and humility while giving some great ideas for giving yourself permission to be awesome.

In this podcast on permission to be awesome you’ll find:

    Oftentimes we think that we wasted our time during our younger years especially if we didn’t get any return on investment.
    There are many ways for people to identify themselves, perhaps in a certain time we graduate, the times we spent before and many more.
    Make a list of the things that you experienced in order to get what you really want.
    Remember that you wouldn’t be where you are today without things you experienced in your past.
    The skills you’ve learned and things you did helped you to arrive where you are now.
    We tend to forget to be grateful for the things in our lives that has gotten us to the places we’re at. The more grateful you are, the more you accomplish and achieve.
    People who have been raised in a survival context (example – people who had terrible upbringing and faced a lot of tragedy in life) have the ability to navigate the world in a very interesting way.
    Humility VS Modesty. Humility is all about where you stand in relationship to everybody else. Modesty is about accepting your limitations and at the same time, acknowledging your skills.
    People are more inclined to trust you as a person when you provide an accurate assessment of where you stand.
    Give yourself permission to be awesome. When you accept how much power you have and all the amazing things that made you who you are now, it takes you to a new level in making a huge difference in the world.

Permission To Be Awesome | PODCAST 0043

In this episode Joel and Antonia answer a question about music type theory and the idea of having a donation button on the Personality Hacker website.


PHQ | QUESTIONS: Music Type Theory and Donations

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the dangers of Schadenfreude (pleasure derived from another person's misfortune) and apply it to the recent Ashley Madison scandal.


The Dangers of Schadenfreude | PODCAST 0076

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about empowering Intuitives to step into leadership and get Intuition into the public consciousness.

Igniting An Intuitive Awakening | PODCAST 0087

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about five ways to build skill around your intuition which will result in trusting it more.


Trusting Your Intuition | PODCAST 0089

In this episode Joel and Antonia dive deep into the needs and desires of the ENFJ personality type.


ENFJ Personality Type Advice | PODCAST 0090

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about strategies to overcome limiting beliefs in your personal growth journey and life.


Overcoming Limiting Beliefs | PODCAST 0104

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the Myers-Briggs cognitive functions and how they play a role in romantic relationships.

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Myers-Briggs Cognitive Functions In Relationships | PODCAST 0160

Personality Hacker teaches you the coding language of your mind and how to use it to create great relationships - a fulfilling career and happiness.



Feedback That Makes You Squirm | PODCAST 0010

Personality Hacker Podcast