thank u for having me on this i love this song

Featuring @lilskeleskrrt
Produced by @metlast
Engineering, additional vocals by @horoshavibes

LYRICS
Still the same scared kid that I was way back then
Know I'd give anything to change how it happened
Still bleeding from the wounds of my past and
Pursuing happiness
But I can't have that

Take another hit to my pride and my passion
Loss after loss like a chain reaction
When everything goes wrong
I need a way out
I can not be trusted to be kind to myself

The drugs don't make it better
They just keep me distracted
From the life I'm supposed to live
And out the one that I'm trapped in
When everything goes wrong
I tend to break down
I can not be trusted to be kind to myself

(skele)
And love I promise that I mean well
All those things I did were fucking my health 
I've never been good at helping out myself
It's getting bad
I prolly need help
I never meant for you to run away 
I just wanted you to feel a bit of my pain 
And when everything goes wrong I hope you'll be here 
Need someone to fix all my fears

Listen on Spotify!

When Everything Goes Wrong w/ skele (Prod. metlast)

needed this to change
produced by @pekarot_161
featuring @lilskeleskrrt
mixed by nine to 5 and skele

lyrics:
nine to 5:
Now I'm left in the cold
Stary late night when my breathe turns to smoke
Living in the past when the rest still unfolds
I just wanna go back when my neck wasn't choked I'm
Stuck inside my mind when I'm passing
Highway signs eastbound we were laughing
Now I'm left with nothing but these memories flashing
gone within a moment and I don't know what happened

I can't get away, yeah theres nowhere I can run to
We've been everywhere, I can't begin to forget you
Your shadows everywhere around me even inside my room
Staring at the wall wishing that I was beside you

Living in this empty state of mind
Wander through this empty space
Lost because I know I'll never find
Anyone to take your place
Shivers running up and down my spine
Tears falling down my face
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

skele:
I've been a part of you for too long
And I still write the same songs
I'll wait here forever love until I figure out what you want
It's never enough
Just break me down
And I'll stay put til you're done
I fucking gave you my heart

both:
I fucking gave you my all

nine to 5:
But it was never enough

nine to 5 and skele:
Living in this empty state of mind
Wander through this empty space
Lost because I know I'll never find
Anyone to take your place
Shivers running up and down my spine
Tears falling down my face
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Yeah you still needed this to change (still needed this, still needed this)
Knowing that I gave you all my heart
But you still needed this to change

Still needed this to change
Knowing that I gave you all my heart but you still needed this to change
Still needed this to change
Yeah you still needed this to change
Knowing that I gave you all my heart but you still needed this to change

needed this to change ft. skele (prod. pekarot)

hold the applause
produced by @prodbybrody
featuring @sewerperson
mixed by nine to 5 and sewerperson

lyrics:
both:
so won't you hold the applause
cause its all that i got
i know its not a lot, but it feeds me the strength that i would need to move on

nine to 5:
I did all the things that i said i would
Try to push me to the side but you never could no
I’m breaking through the walls it’s competitive
Now im taking to the bottle like a sedative woah

After all of this time and i still get it wrong
I won’t tell you what you wanted hear no more
Yeah you played me a game tryna get up the score
But i aint finished yet i’m still coming for more

So won’t you hold the applause
Cuz its all that i got
You tore it apart
It was doomed from the start
Fallin for your mirage 

Falling from nothing
But oh its so exciting
To go
To these places i aint been before
You took hold my body sunk it into the floor

going insane, my body is sore
i feel a lot different than i did before
seasons have changed, i'm closing these doors
i'm burning these bridges can't take anymore
so take all i am, i'll do what i can
but nothing will satisfy you in the end
but i understand, it's all gone as planned
you fucked up my head but i'll take what i can

sewerperson:
Seventeen nights in the grip of cold hands
Baby i try do u right while u just doing what u can
Wails heard thru the night from somewhere deep inside the branch
Toss out a flare we can light up the world
Ash floats thru the air as this fire unfurls
Tell me how this shit compare to a night better spent
Watch The banshee touch down on to the charring grasslands

Won’t you hold the applause
Cause its all that I got
I know its not a lot but it feeds me the strength I would need to move on
With her taste on my tongue
And my hand on my heart
I cant be what u need but I swear on my life I will be what u want
With the grace of a wisp
She comes right around and attaches to my hip
She whispers are u scared and I said maybe just a bit
U know I cant lie when u look at me like this
When u look me in my eyes
I know u could see into my soul into my mind
U know I know I could never get away with lying
That’s why its the truth that without u id rather die

listen on spotify!

hold the applause ft. sewerperson (prod. brody)

broken ft. navyxower (dash)

produced by cxrter & tahtx

lyrics:
(notahero)
heavy snow is pouring outside the window
u know exactly what u want in life
but i don’t know
but i’ll carry on
and i’ll love u if you're here or you're gone
i’ll find u thru the crowd
she don’t know i’m hurting cuz i barely make a sound
this hole i’ve dug so deep
i can’t see through out the ground
u can find me in the lost and found
christmas was never this cold
christmas was never this cold

(backyard beetle)
yeah
as the candle burns real low
the light begins to show
you may be gone but your presence still glows
feasting on fragments and memories of old
i live in a wasteland i ain't never seen the snow 
even then I can't help but feel it's so cold
cause all of my warmth came from you
what am i supposed to do 
when my systems shut down

(notahero)
christmas was never this cold
christmas was never this cold

christmas was never this cold (prod. cxrter x tahtx)

self prod
guitar by hiraeth
<3


in ur own ways
tell me where u stand
no. its not 2 faced
dont understand? :)
is all that you take
left the way u found it? 
now this i cant shake
not this, i doubt it

Maybe on a different day
You’d have been nice to me
Maybe in some different ways
U formed apologies
If the weather was a different type 
Would u still be with me?
Cloudy, with seafret in sight 
Does that mean anything?
its the way that you are
i thought you loved that i hated myself, not to mention
my critiques are poor
theres nothing left in this hollow, ashen and hes tarnished
to
no ones support
i probably could do more
baby watch me fumble, every chance i get in love
im
cutting down my line
is that what you planned for my life ?
its clearly out of spite, youve done it 3 or 4 more times

shake w/ hiraeth

Said you got lawn mower problems
You don’t know a thing about motors gotta solve em
Pull the cord twice no bark no bite
We’re still getting nothing 
Black dust out the back coughing up something 
Pat my back I’m totally fine
I swear whilst you run your fingers through my hair
We grab lunch and talk cheap repairs

Heard lowes gotta deal on 
Let’s go down see which one you like the feel of
Wait are we thinking this through 
We can get a repair by noon 
Start of the day it’s battered up bruised
The end of the day we’re looking brand new
Took it home in the back of my car
Pull the cord twice there’s bark theres bite 
We’ve been at this for a whole damn night 
Wondering if we’ll ever get this fix
No more black dust chuffing out the back
This time your coughing up your thanks

Lawn Mower Problems (mackk)

produced by cxrter & retz
📸: cxrter

lyrics:
i’m so sick of the notion
they won’t ever understand 
got no things to put hope in
got me hanging by a strand
keep a cabinet open
and a bottle in my hand
found the pressure too potent
now i'm nothing like you planned
thought you wanted devotion
now you want some other man
got me stuck in a ocean
it’s high tide

everybody wanna know what i do
it doesn't matter
when i'm writing
swear it's pulling me through

we don’t talk like we did when we were close friends
i've been sick and tired, tying up my loose ends
she said i should go to bed, but i need one more
sorry baby, i know lately i'm an eyesore

yeah we used to want that house with picket fence
now summers almost over and you told me it depends
putting teardrops on my pants 
and now my music my one plan
i don’t wanna walk around it
quit the drama no offense
i’mma 
i’mma be who i'm destined to be
watching people pull me down
but i'm still on my feet
bet you’re looking at now
while i'm living out my dreams
never did it for myself
girl i did it for the weak

we don’t talk like we did when we were close friends
i've been sick and tired, tying up my loose ends
she said i should go to bed, but i need one more
sorry baby, i know lately i'm an eyesore

everybody wanna know what i do
it doesn't matter
when i'm writing
swear it's pulling me through
just hoping for some guidance
looking at my scars
on my cheeks and on my eyelids

like girl i feel it in my chest, when the night turns young i can feel it in my head now
why i’m feeling so depressed
but i try to talk about it
and it turns into a mess
i was just a kid now i'm losing all my hope
put a bounty on my head
point your gun and now i'm broke
wrong way wrong turn and now im dead weight
can't kick a habit
i can feel it on my worst days
they keep saying that im perfect
but u knew im never worth it
like i kept lying to ur face
now i'm going back to bed
but its been feeling like my grave

we don’t talk like we did when we were close friends
i've been  sick and tired, tying up my loose ends
she said i should go to bed but i need one more
sorry baby i know lately i'm an eyesore

eyesore w/ halfhearted (prod. cxrter x retz)

lyrics

every piece of me is saying
word on the streets is your not staying
beg on my knees for you to say it
x2
but pleasant grove is all you know and fractured homes with broken family
i can’t tell you where to go
but every road led back to folly

yeah every time that we touch base, water works right out my face
just how you found me
four years but i guess who’s counting 
every time that you embrace me
you’re saying “stop it grayson”
wish i had the heart to say
iv been numb for days waiting on the pavement 

iv been throwing up, iv been throwing up all on the pavement 
she’s said it’s so frustrating 
she said i wish you were happier
so now every smile feel like a facelift
now you got tears running down your face 
but you took it all and i gave it
i know it’s not good for my brain 
but i have more fun when im wasted
now i been drinking every night but safely
six months ago this looked so much different 
but word on the street and my mind says you hate me 
that would rip my heart in an instant
last time we had a fight 
i remember what it felt like to cry 
got smoke in my mouth and got tears in my eyes
cuz i don’t want the last time
to be the last time we say goodbye 

yeah every time that we touch base, water works right out my face
just how you found me
four years but i guess who’s counting 
every time that you embrace me
you’re saying “stop it grayson”
wish i had the heart to say
iv been numb for days waiting on the pavement 

sticks and stones tend to break me down
try to grab the wheel but im crashing out
mom and dad don’t like me know
it hurts because they used to be proud
why you never around 
when i’m calling your phone,you’re just putting it down
iv been falling apart on the burial grounds
iv been screaming for help but can’t open my mouth.

folly w/ notahero [king theta]

~2300~
produced by @whois_playd3ad & myself <3

let the world spin (again)

lyrics //

didnt bother writing
i swore its all behind me
i saw it all play out
i saw the silver lining

guess we both figured out 
the reason weve been hiding
sick of all the run around
im sick of how you want him

you can try, break it off 
turn around take the fall
it was just the two of us
left the town where we grew up

holding onto grudges
im holding on nothing but
use me as a substance
pump me right into ur blood

(pump me right into your blood
im my mamas only son 
im my mamas only son)


i can be the one you want
i cant heal a broken heart
found me in a local bar’s street
find it funny when they run
find a feeling in a cup
fighting ppl that i love

my fist been clinched, i dnd my phone
miss the kid i was but now hes grown
if your the queen
then id be at ur throne
a peasant in the midst of common folk

you can try, break it off
turn around take a fall
it was just the two of us, 
left the town where we grew up
holding on to grudges, i’m holding on to nothing but
use me as a substance
pump me right into your blood

substance [neverforever]

Chicagoland Producer 💜🖤🩶🤍 | 20 | 🧠♾️
(prod.) credits: @lilskeleskrrt @emofruits @vito2300 @denverkell @autumndropsdead

christmas was never this cold (prod. cxrter x tahtx)

🥀 cxrter 🖤

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