I <3 EPU(N)KE

bad vibes

Playlist

Indie pop

Working on my own songs right now so here's this for now

❤️ OR SOMETHING idk :/

Sophmore year

lyrics:
ghost me 
O-M-G
bitches want to know me
L-O-L
im laughing at you homie

oh no whos he?
sorry that im nosy
K-Y-S
does he know that youre with me?

F-M-L
but i guess you dont care though
S-O-S
cause i think i really need help
K-M-S
cause i cant stand this hell

(yeah) cause i think im gonna kill myself

i hate you

Painfully Sober (with Teenage Disaster)

what do you when you pop like a balloon
someone else can show you
someone else can blow you

what do you when the party's meant for two
and no one's really showin up
no one gives a fuck about you

maybe you would see if you came back for me
that i would sneak you through your low and lonely lows

baby i can see with your back turned to me
 that you would leave if i couldn’t do things on my own

need to tie a knot can anybody say how
im waiting for you it'll happen any day now
or one day oh, one day
your memory will fade
can i touch you i really wanna touch you
can i fuck you i really wanna fuck you
or one day oh, one day
i hope you'll feel the same

baby i can see
 with your hands all over me
 that you’ve been holding in a love  for someone else
maybe you would be
the perfect guy for me
but i just cant compete  even though i’ve killed myself

but why should i believe you
every breath you breathe and everything you do
is alerting and im squirming on the floor
so when can i see you
everyday im waiting just for something new
its so sad but true
(its so sad but true, its so sad but true)

pop the balloon
pop the balloon
pop the balloon
pop the balloon
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
pop the balloon(pop the balloon)(pop)(pop)(pop)(pop)
(pop)

Balloon

Booze Hounds Ft. HKFiftyOne (Teenage Disaster Cover) Prod. BMTJ

september

teeth (you)

Im Swatting All My Enemies
i hope they all get shot
Im swatting all my enemies
I hope they kill your dog

You fkn cheater
Stop using AIM bot
You fkn cheater
Flashbang through your door

You lagging the entire server
Your skins are fkn gay
You should kys
Stay away from video games

Nobody wants to be your friend
Your char is very gay
SWAT is knocking on your door
I want to see your brains on the floor

Swatting all My Enemies

MASK (FEAT. BLCKK)

https://open.spotify.com/album/7jsLbJhaBDuL6nJIO47x4j#login%3Fflow_id=a6de5c8a-3b42-4e66-baf8-ed0e31fe3850%3A1680259362 where i got from

Collapsing

NEET and DethTech - Collapsing

https://youtu.be/hNDco3XaFY0 where i got it

Fried By Fluoride - The Love I Lost

cant look at you
rotting dead body tissue
can you feel anything?
stupid cant even talk right
making a fool of myself one more time
i want to kill my mind
try to end my life not the first time

so useless i might aswell be dead
never gonna leave my fucking bed
i'm worthless feeling so jaded 
waiting for my pain to come to an end

were falling in
skeleton bodies
sitting here just bleeding out slowly
giving in to the pain i suffer
would rather die than find another

so useless i might aswell be dead
never gonna leave my fucking bed
i'm worthless feeling so jaded 
waiting for my pain to come to an end

carve out my fucking flesh
you make me feel like death
you did this to me
its all your fault

so useless i might aswell be dead
never gonna leave my fucking bed
i'm worthless feeling so jaded 
waiting for my pain to come to an end

might aswell be dead

and i cant take this shit no more
my blood spills out all on the floor
you promised everything to me
but all you did was ruin me

you have lips like razor blades
your words cut through my fucking veins
kiss my neck and bring me pain
my love was always in vain

darling take me back to before
i cant even look at your face anymore
darling i'm losing my mind
you make me want to fucking die

i've had enough of you
nothing you said was true
ran off to some fucking guy
the moment we were through
and i cant take this shit
hope you find someone who loves it

don't go don't go
darling youre all i know
please go please go
you make me feel so alone
don't go don't go
darling youre all i know
please go please go
better off with no home

darling take me back to before
i cant even look at your face anymore
darling i'm losing my mind
you make me want to fucking die

im just ur problem

(he is cloaked to me
the voices give me nothing)

losing myself for you was my one mistake
delusions dragging me down, cant bury my fate
leaving everything behind 
you'll never see my face again

this is the fucking end 

take my hand and run away we'll end our lives tonight
death in each others arms sounds like bliss by your side
when i'm with you everything hurts so much fucking more
as our blood drips down on us we fade to nothingness

i love when you enjoy my pain
fucking slash my wrists for you baby
bleeding out, its beautiful
that you don't care about me at all
don't change for me now darling
my disease is my love for you
no drugs could help me get through

take my hand and run away we'll end our lives tonight
death in each others arms sounds like bliss by your side
when i'm with you everything hurts so much fucking more
as our blood drips down on us we fade to nothingness

dying 4 ur luv

first song of 2024, enjoy :)

ps. sleez aint over >;)

luvsick ft thxsomch (prod re6ce + noah terefe)

brown eyes*

featuring @dethtech

i won't see angels when i die
let it happen, let me lie here
i'm done trying to be like you
keep pretending like you didn't steal my heart
you'll take all i have and take all my memories

these blood stained eyes can't see your face
i can't stop the blood

when i'm dead ill write to you in dreams
roses dying, light the cigarette, i'm a bloody mess
i should've known our love would end in tragedy
i watch the tears fall from your eyes, i'm so heartless

buried deep beneath your skin
lies the hurt that broke you
clawing from within
god knows the height i've left to fall
all i can see is you've gone cold

when i'm dead ill write to you in dreams
roses dying, light the cigarette, i'm a bloody mess
i should've known our love would end in tragedy
i watch the tears fall from your eyes, i'm so heartless

i can't sleep when im with you
she had the wings of an angel
but that girl was a devil in disguise
i saw her wings were broken
so she just stood there as i died

i wont see angels when i die, they'll laugh as i fall

i wont see angels when i die, they'll laugh as i fall ft. DethTech

is suicide too much?

Staring at the ground
just thinking to myself
I wanna talk to you
but you're looking at someone else

My head is full of smoke
it's getting hard to see
You're so far away
you're so out of reach

I don't know what to say
I don't know what to do
wish I knew how to be
wish I was more like you
you float right through the air
and I can't keep my cool
wish I could run away
wish I was more like you

someone else

https://open.spotify.com/track/5ZIIE80NheRzoIBzmo18dU?si=f78fc6c0ed884726

@melodyx_o cover
prod me

i feel like i am dead
cant get outside my heaad my head
i feel like i cant move
just dont know what to doooo
to do

i hate being alive
slit my wrist i wanna die
wish i wasnt such a guy
stay inside like all the time
life just feels like such a pain
i really hate everything
motivation is so drained
and i really hate my face like
oooo
been so long since i have cleaned my rooom
been so long since i have made my fucking bed
i feel so made fun of by all of my friends
and
i feel so degen
i wake myself
at 1 pm
i hate this life
i think of death
but im too scared
of nothingness
im not prepared
to leave this world
i wish i was
an average girl
instead i struggle to feel real
instead i struggle to see a life where i pay bills

i feel like i am dead
cant get outside my heaadd my head
i feel like i cant move
just dont know what to doooo
to do

i dont know why i try
bad decisions i just cry
see incisions on my thighs
next to prickly bumps of mine
everything is strange
why do i feel so much pain
my hair feels so disarrayed
and i cannot feel okay like
i dont have like any power
feel like my life is over
only have me to blame
throw on a skirt and
run outside again
embarrassing
myself for hours
feel ashamed my shitty mood
ive fucked my life too soon
i know i’m not doing too well
i’ll end up a jisatsu girl
if i don’t grab onto myself
if i don’t lose my fucking mind without some help

i feel like i am dead
cant get outside my heaad my head
i feel like i cant move
just dont know what to doooo
to do

jisatsu girl (自殺) (cover)

stop listening to this shit cover and go listen to my actual music PLEASE

miss america-jaydes (cover)

new version of my first cover
also mic broke :(

hysteric-jaydes (RE-cover)

https://open.spotify.com/track/7GHsBQ5oLMz6Jhq6TgzBHj?si=m6AqD8a8T5CoOFmWkkiqOA&context=spotify%3Aalbum%3A4fE7fPBBe4x8t58IbcpFs4

prod me ft @kiheir

@requiem-for-you
saw u at that party last week
im so damn awkward u know i cant speak
but baby please
believe
that ur everything to me
x2

u treated me like shit
i know its not ur fault but it kinda is
i never thought that it would end like this
i never thought these words would leave my lips
but baby im cutting at my wrists
and i dont see an end to it
can someone help me
im dying
without u darling
oohhhhhh

@kiheir
and i never thought id feel this way
now that im seein u in the same damn place
or meeting u in these awkward ways
now that im seein u in the same damn place
or meeting u in these awkward ways
no one here to fill the void of my days
cuz ur gone
cuz ur gone

i needed u said ud never run away
the partys almost over i just hope that ud stay
my mind went blank ive got no words to say to u
and i doubt that u do too
ooooh i doubt that u do too
and i miss u but im glad that i met u

@requiem-for-you
saw u at that party last week
im so damn awkward u know i cant speak
but baby please
believe
that ur everything to me
x2

awkward w/ kiheir

https://open.spotify.com/track/5Nnwe5weuh5fyte28mcrJR?si=ea812a2a3b0c4e23

old (wujek) styleeeee !!!!! beat by me 

w/ @humanendeavour

[endeavour:]
together oh forever
your so clever yea whenever
things get better it gets better
oh however it will never
together oh forever
your so clever yea whenever
things get better it gets better
oh however it will never

[sekai:]
migraine my head aches
ur phone contains my messages
u haven't read im dead
im being ignored again
yesterday i had the worst time
and today if i said im good
then thas a lie
can't get better
im stuck inside
this shitty weather
i wanna die
i said my head hurts
a thousand times
but when ur near me
i feel fine

[endeavour:]
together oh forever
your so clever yea whenever
things get better it gets better
oh however it will never
together oh forever
your so clever yea whenever
things get better it gets better
oh however it will never

[sekai:]
can't get better
im stuck inside
this shitty weather
i wanna die
but when ur near me
i feel fine

[endeavour:]
together oh forever
your so clever yea whenever
things get better it gets better
oh however it will never
together oh forever
your so clever yea whenever
things get better it gets better
oh however it will never
ill my blood feel it up i wanna fill it all with blood
i feel your guts i cut it up
im sorry if that is too much

together forever w/ endeavour

I feel like a loser you hear me say
I know you also feel this way
I need you more than words can express
You’re a product of my depressed

(Prechorus)
So wont you be my girl
Me and you against the world
so please be by my side
holding hands swinging side to side

(Chorus)
Schizophrenia girlfriend
Schizophrenia girlfriend 

You mean so much to me
Even though you’re a fantasy
I wish you were really here

no one else to ruin our day
you and i can waste away
I need you more than words can express
You’re a product of my depressed

(Prechorus)
So wont you be my girl
Me and you against the world
so please be by my side
holding hands swinging side to side

(Chorus)
Schizophrenia girlfriend
Schizophrenia girlfriend 
When will it end?
This delusion in my head

You mean so much to me
Even though you’re a fantasy
I wish you were really here

Schizophrenia Girlfriend

https://open.spotify.com/track/4Yod5zUEZ5SyNe0LTqbhVu?si=f91fced6fb2c4d31

w the boat @yukisasayaki prod me

i can't get out 
I've been feeling so fucking down
no one hears me 
when i'm clearly screaming loud
every chance i get
i mess it up without a doubt
put me in a crown
when im the worst like all around
benefit from the misery that i feel
cuz i know no one wants me around anymore
there's no mistake, i'm a waste
i'm not real
cuz that's the sense i get
i'm played with like i'm fake

im drowning in my sorrow
about tomorrow but also yesterday
i don't think i remember
it's been like this forever
I've never gotten better
at least that's on my record..
my hearts buried down
cuz no one sticks around
I've wrote my vows
to never open up
to anyone
i dont need new friends
im better off alone and dead

i cant do it
wont make it thru the day
yea ill prove it
slit my throat n decay
u want what i want
n i rlly want me dead
it mightve been from
all of the things u said
n i cant take it
the words infecting my head
i guess no one would care if i bled out in my bed
im such a loser n im always such a fucking burden
i try n socialize but i can never get a word in
n u look in my eyes n tell me that im fucking worthless
u leave me paralysed oh pls just finish me for certain

and worst of all, it's me

and worst of all, it's me (ft. yuki)

https://open.spotify.com/track/4Mkqb85Xssw7NjMCH7zDKN?si=f0939011e78b4e22

prod me w/ @yukisasayaki again yayyy

meet me on the roof after school
i fell in love n i wanna tell u
i know we don't talk but i think ur cool
n if u don't say it back, ig death will do
i-l-y, i might die
k-m-s, suicide
it's lie after lie, but this time i might try
knife in my chest twist it right close my eyes

baby i feel like im gonna die
tell me that u love me while u look me in my eyes
notice how i see u
from across the classroom
pretend to drop my pencil
and watch it roll past u
i jus wish ud notice me
a loser with no apathy 
slit my throat n watch it bleed
if u n me can never be
i swear that ill take my life
use ur silence as my knife
so come and take my hand
i wish u could be my wife 

yea be be mine
never leave my sight
we can live together in a loop
for the rest of time
no different options
no fucking pathways
ur stuck here forever we'll never part ways 

meet me on the roof after school
i fell in love n i wanna tell u
i know we don't talk but i think ur cool
n if u don't say it back, ig death will do
i-l-y, i might die
k-m-s, suicide
it's lie after lie, but this time i might try
knife in my chest twist it right close my eyes

dating sim suicide (ft. yuki)

we made this like 2 months ago 

prod by. @deadyami

w/ @akira3ksucks

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/44nIhegzZLQSoC5buGanGh?si=fb18ebd3a9134411

pwnd/
I know it's hard for me to give a single fuck 
When I wake up I'm always thinking bout' us
Taking tablets knowing that I'll end up in a rush
But if you call me back I will be singing about us
I was sober until I met this girl 
She told me run the way I'd fuck up your world
But I'm stupid I like watching my life burn
But that's what I get and why it still hurts
I'd sing you're name during this song
But I know you would just sing along 
Keep messing with me you're in the wrong
And that's why I still pick up you're calls

redize/
I'm left on read again
I'm still seeing red I guess, but just know
I'm still mad about it I can't help from shouting
About all the bullshit that you wrote
How could I forget about you said 
I'm feeling left for dead 
Yeah I hope you know
Yeah I hope you know, yeah I hope you know
I'd sing you're name during this song
But I know that you'd just sing along 
Keep messing with me you're in the wrong
That's why I still pick up you're calls

Care abt us

Care abt us w/pwnd [+ deadyami]

prod. me

gezebelle cover cuz i love this song so much
@gezebellegaburgably

pizza rolls royce (gezebelle gaburgably cover)

Nevermind

Something In The Way

Woke up again today
With no missions and zero strength
I don't know how to play
And I don't want to anyway
Need to delete this game
And go back to another save

But my hard drive's fucked
Zero charisma, zero luck
I don't have any skills
Or the XP to fix my build

The simulation's fucked
Everything and everybody sucks
NPCs hate my guts
I wanna quit, want to log off
I'm not having any fun

(My hard drive's fucked) I'm not having any fun
(Zero charisma, zero luck) I'm not having any fun
(The simulation's fucked) I'm not having any fun
(I'm not having any fun) I'm not having any fun

Life is an RPG and I Fucked Up My Build

HALLOWEEN SUICIDE (FT. TEENAGE DISASTER)

rock and roller on the interwebss.

I prod most my stuff.