@heylog
produced by @herskylin

(vil)
i stay in the moment i’m lost in
time fractures and i’m exhausted
serpent biting all on the cartridge
perfecting everything in my way
and it sucks to suck
in your world
i mean nothing to you, you say it sucks to be you
(cut me loose)

cut me loose from the ties i’m
holding on despite the
ruckus you’ve caused
i should abandon you but what would that fix
…nothing at all
this confrontation is just breaking us apart
i cant even find the start
and so i

break down (x4)
can’t find a way, need an escape
i’m left for dead blood spewin out
my pores are closing
i’m decomposing
show me what it’s like to be controlling

(heylog)
my life's so concerning
wait too long i need to hurry
my stomach's churning
decide if i need to worry
what am i here for
what is my goal
oh my god i'm so worn from climbing out this hole
abuse my body oh it's hurting
i'm so lost think that i'm worthless
pretty sure i don't have a purpose
make mistakes constantly learning
what not to do next time
too lazy to reply
but i don't even try
desert phone, it's so dry

(vil)
i’m bleeding out from my wrist
and i’m choked up, let me say my final wish
you act like what we had never existed
so i’m blaming you until death

spotify

serpent +heylog (skylin ✧)

Cold breath running down my neck
Life been constant stress
Know that I'm a mess
No more tears are left now
Thought we had a chance
Said its for the best
Still I know that you'll be coming back around, coming back around
Still faded, been playing myself for too long
Narcissistic prick only listen to my own songs
Always bullshittin' swear that you would never do me wrong
Always lies, know I really wish that you would prove me wrong

Fool me once, it's okay know I've been thru this
Fool me twice and that trigger might get pulled man
Saying I'm the same as I once was, been a lost cause
No more speaking rip your jaw off
Fool me once, it's okay know I've been thru this
Fool me twice and that trigger might get pulled man
Saying I'm the same as I once was, been a lost cause
No more speaking rip your jaw off

I don't trust your boy know he lying every word
If any girl come near me, there's no option but to curve
Always laying low, only talking to myself
I'm starting to realize that this ain't good for my health
Lonely, met a new one
Is it too soon to say that I'm in love?
Hold me, physical touch
Surprised I got you, guess it was luck

Don't show my face oh please don't record
Don't let him in, promise me you'll ignore
Drowning my voice, don't care if it distorts
I want your love I need more I need more
You need to quit
Alcoholic
She hauling two beers and that's not attractive
But your so pretty on the outside
Hurting inside
Stay with me if you wanna walk a straight line

spotify link<3

lostcause w/ heylog (31sentinel)

prod. by me

@xona

lyrics:

-du1-
fuck all your trust im so done
you always just left me behind
the palm of my hand filled with hope
why don't you just give me sign


sink stained with blood
too lame no trust
fuck all your trust im so done
you always just left me behind
the palm of my hand filled with hope
why don't you just give me sign


close my gates
fuck off i don't wanna play
its such a fucking shame for you to know me by my name
no i don't play your game
cut off just every vein
you're the one to blame
don't gaslight your mistakes
breaking every single bottle
i don't recall your fucking face no
watch me bleed on the floor do nothing
what you scared for?
fuck the promises you gave me right when i just met you
fuck the promises we gave us through a fucking phone yeah
tell me
why are you leaving just now
right when i need you
now i am always alone
why do i trust you
and thats my issue
its either kill or lose
i don't need us two
no i don't need us two

fuck all your trust im so done
you always just left me behind
the palm of my hand filled with hope
why don't you just give me sign
why cant you stay
sweet but too afraid
spit on your hands
all for a friend


sink stained with blood
too lame no trust
fuck all your trust im so done
you always just left me behind
the palm of my hand filled with hope
why don't you just give me sign


-xona-
falling all behind
write your life inside
down to your last line
break truths and deny 
oo~
so heaven sent 
dont lie to me
when you mess ahead 
oo~
you dont think the best 
but off the edge
you want to bridge
to rest this urge, cold shoulder of her curse
too much, too many learn
of my life and it hurts

behind [w/xona]

butterfly [w/skylin and xona]

produced by xona, ruevi, & oc

big thank you to all individuals who helped make this song possible <3

@ruevi @prod-oc
@heylog
@hiraethsry
@sleepywater
@sinxi
@caspywaspy
@vilsynth
@valerii
@deadfishh

the lyrics were over 4000 characters and that's the limit for soundcloud ♥

-lyrics-
https://genius.com/Xona-avoid-ii-lyrics

xona

avoid II w/ ruevi, heylog, hiraeth, sleepwater, sinxi, casperrr, vil, valerii & deadfish

w @heylog
produced by sleepwater and leftquiet

lyrics:
ive been to heaven hell and she wanted it
she wanna ham my neck till im on it
switching positions i feel like im in night time
i don't feel the sun no more i dont like sunshine
quicker my heart declines
more that i find myself
shut my windows and blinds
more that i hate myself
i dislike everything
but dislike you the most
my lifes full of sin
cos i dont know where to go

stood outside im seeing flies
im outside you know my time
wait for this im on a climb
fuck my psyche its pain until i die
gaining more likes am i doing something right
its gone up in spikes have i gone up in my life
maybe you should listen to me once in a while
surely you would be different if you werent in denial
EVERY THOUGHT SHES EVER HAD STARTS TO FUCKING PILE
OH I WISH I NEVER HAD SHES FUCKING VILE
depression getting really bad you can crack a smile
you can barely leave your bed stop acting like a child
how did you get rid of your sweat did you run it off
do something w ur life and make it worthwile

heylog:
she's so psychotic, i knew when i saw
speaking so toxic ur just like ur mom
everything i do she gets really pissed
so why does it feel like it's always my fault
god ur chaotic, quit starting a fight
i ain't one to argue, it's a waste of time
she purposely trying to spark up a flame
and now all of this is getting out of line
oh baby
ur so cold
ur making this easy
give more
oh baby
we're off course
she said she want more she said she want more
innocence
don't exist
she'll find ways to get your head
she's offended again
exaggerate things i say
oh my dear
you're in fear
block it out with a few beers
everyone she's ever cursed is in a pile
everyone she's ever hurt calls her vile
and everyone she's done the worst gets away
am i the only one who's learned from her pain
now the whole place burnt down
and i can see it in her eyes she's happy
i hope you know u look like a clown
cus only you would act a little trashy

𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘺 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨

pile w/heylog

prod. by me

lyrics:

cigarettes for fun
got me kinda fucked
never had a choice
and i feel so fake

tyrna die young
im always on the run
never take advice
it feels too lame

sold my body to the things that fucked me up
told myself i'll never be like this oh god
couple lil shots and i think im done 
told myself i'll never be like this oh god

i gave my body away for a better life
for a better time
i threw my life away for a better time
but take a look at my 


bloodbath
~
b-bloodbath 


always having fun now
never ever shut down
never learned for life
i think i might just drop out 

always run around now
never ever think loud
never had the guts to be like this
you know me?

always run away
never solved my problems
cigarettes all the same
cause i know they kill me

never liked the taste of life
imma make it okay
never liked the taste of time
imma make it decay

sold my body to the things that fucked me up
told myself i'll never be like this oh god
couple lil shots and i think im done 
told myself i'll never be like this oh god

i gave my body away for a better life
for a better time
i threw my life away for a better time
but take a look at my 


bloodbath
~
b-bloodbath 

bath

produced by zoltar

lyrics:

bleed out 
separated from all the tension
seek doubt
disregarded their good intentions
sleep now 
you inflated all my distortions
breathe out
i won't let you say something morbid

we could argue all we want, but we both know we're splitting hairs
seems like nowadays we're stuck indulging and nobody cares
 addicted to convenience while these corporations take a share 
take on my perspective and then we'll see how you really fare

i've been misshapen 
beaten down and hated
 i don't deserve this
 light keeps on fading
 i've been wasting myself tryna pick up the mess
 all the feelings i harbored, they won't lay to rest
 so i thought of your face, now i can't go to bed
 i still have your t-shirt, it's the one that you said
 would look better on me, but despite your regret
 i think you looked lovely, now i can't decompress

i could never put you into words 'cause i feared
 that it wouldn't be good enough
 i think it's clear
 the dependency issues that i've displayed here
 and it's frightening i haven't loved no one in years

this shit is making me sick 
but i'm tapped the fuck in
 steady zoning out in front of my monitor like a kid
 now you can't take no offense
 but are you that fucking dense?
 my brain is growing pretty tired
 from all of your shitty friends

-----

newton's flaming laser sword

prod by me :>

(skylin)
all the hatred that you're giving me is only poisoning
at least with my enemies i know what it is they seek
I rather judas instead of someone backstabbing me
oh you're pathetic askin me if I would forgive you

I never go out or talk to people like I know I should
it's easier not engaging and hiding inside my hood
sometimes I tend to fail myself and everyone around me
I guess it kinda scared me from socially interacting

on the darkest days I don't know who it is that I will call
but I am hoping you answer because im bout to fall
and I don't know where I am going but ik you know it all
so I am calling out to you please do not let me fall


(heylog)
catch me on the other end
what i said i really meant
what are all the thoughts your brain holds
what's inside that head
i think i finally figured you out
i think it's time to step out your life now
i don't know what i did for you to become untied to me
if you're gonna act like this then break it off entirely
and if i would've known your emotions would all start piling
then i would've kept it hush instead of you crying to me
i was there for you when no one else was
now i'm seeing the truth and exposing your bluffs
i was there for you at your lowest point
don't go and blame it on me, this wasn't my choice

[[anger - disconnect]]

traitor w/heylog

traitor w/ heylog (Now on Spotify)

produced by zoltar

lyrics:

i know i'll find another way
to feel like a whole person
i need a thousand extra days
to conjure some encouragement
size me up for now
i think i'm fiending for some sentiment
could you show me how
to make good impressions so no one forgets?

you don't wanna see me when i can't get the words out
i push away the people that i care the most about
i don't even mean the shit that comes out of my mouth
i can't help but feel like everyone is out to get me
wreck me
people love to test me
acting like i'm not worth the dog shit that they stepped in
i really hate all the people who never listen
the ones that talk a lot of shit then just act like a victim
you think i'm flirting, i'm not
i got a head full of thoughts
i'm sweating bullets and i'm starting to develop a cough
i waste away in my room
bite at my skin 'cause of you
i'm better now, but honestly, that shit was just fucking rude
how could you leave it like that?
no care for who you attract
you oughta thank your false god that these teeth can retract
i'll sink them into your knee
destroy support underneath
because i'm going for the jugular, i'm never at ease

i'm never at ease...

stop
wait 'til i'm gone
i know you're aching for something you've lost
preaching to some
get through to none
what is the point of explaining myself
when everyone listens to somebody else?
wasting my breath on the anger you held
it's all my fault and i reap what i sow
you fooled me once now that's twice in a row

knee

Prod ERXN & heylog

every photo, im not recognised
its always black and white, with some grain inside
you would think that i was tryna hide
im really not i just hate what i see

you wouldnt like it no doubt
ill force my hand over your mouth
youre half the size of me now
bruise on your knees start to sprout

look to my left, im in a forest where im tryna find 
a piece of you that just keeps falling down beside my side
i ran right through the forest path we did a thousand times
im scared that I wont make it back I might of lost my mind 
might of broke down for a minute but its cool 
image distorted in my vision when you call 
i know its just anxiety but if its more 

ima need a Prozac for this 
if you never loved me that's shit 
keep me out of line like im wearing high viz 
keep me outside like im never not in 
if you need me il die il tell you im in 
see me outside come around real quick 
baby I know the way to try and get your hate out 
click it back and put it to my face now

man i wish that she was close
hanging out, youre on the phone
think that i just found a home
hopefully we'll always grow
11 days until i board my flight
i just gotta know if youre worth my time
moving on to better things
she found me, shes in love w me
she always wants to say my name
yeah all she does is say my name
and i love her honesty
you really put my mind at ease
she wants to call me everyday
just so she can say my name

bath

ruevi

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