I needed this right now, way 2 fuckin good on repeat, much love 🖤

This so incredibly relateable, love it <3

the first single off my new album 'dearly departing', coming out 9/9!

fully produced and mastered by @jolst
album art by @/ashleydhe on instagram

so much time and effort has been put into this project and i truly hope u enjoy <3

lyrics:
i cant really see it here and now
and the lights behind my back are turning down
every sailor knows his in and outs
but i struggle every now and then with life so hear me out

i might die today
i could throw my life away
every time i surface i cant see
i think my mind’s away
they say im bad luck
thats why the bad stuck
and follows me everywhere

seeing aint always believing
the ocean was never forgiving
we need to drop anchor

and i stand and wait as cold air breaks the sail before us all
our fatal fate has taken everything that we once loved
so fuck it all
if i go down i’ll be swinging
a rope tied to songs i’ve been singing
the weight is enough for a fixing
so i tighten the knot and im ready for war
war
i still need more (from life, inside my mind)
more

i cant really see it here and now
so i contemplate the ways in which i drown
every time i’m lost im never found
i just suffer all the consequences, end up on the ground

i might die today
i could throw my life away
every time i surface i cant see
i think my mind’s away
they say im bad luck
thats why the bad stuck
and follows me everywhere 

seeing aint always believing
the ocean was never forgiving
we need to drop anchor

im leading a life not worth living
and seemingly so, unforgiving
its time i let out this anger

dearly departing

anchor [jolst]

spotify & apple music!

V. anchor [jolst]

i think it’s time, i
finally stay the night 
and you can look your best
it doesn’t matter 
anything to me
i can’t do anything right 
i’ll zip up my lips cus
i don’t wanna lie to you 

so i’ll try, try 
until i cave in
in my sleep 
see familiar faces 
heart gone blue 
need ventilation 
all my bones shake with anticipation 
and you try but you cannot erase it 
time well spent, i be fillin these pages 
with pretty words that i thought would get her
i’m not the same as i was in december

my dreams are trying to kill me (bennykaay)

【﻿ｎｕｍｂ　ｍｙ　ｔａｓｔｅ　ａｎｄ　ｆｅｅｄ　ｍｅ　ｔｒｕｔｈ】

thank you for listening. i really, really appreciate it.

produced by @prod_death 🖤
hope you enjoy.


walking with grace 
behind closed curtains
and i know that pain
finding out they're not the same
it's just not the same.

i feel like i can touch hades
but the thought of you's the only thing that's kept me saving
from all the bloodshed
i take it all in
i let that deep breath
enter my skin
i haven't felt formaldehyde in a while
it's become so difficult to work up a smile
hit me back if i'm worth every mile
i used to believe what i wanted was peace
but when i open my mouth i feel like a mime

fuck that
i'm ripping the tape off of my face
but don't look at the paste please :(
i wake up and i'm already shaking
there's only so much i can take in
loss of dexterity causes corrosion
i missed every note that i needed the most
don't open their heart till' you've opened your own

the truth (i'm boutta fall through)
i guess you never really knew me (knew me)
that's why i never get through (give a fuck abt you)
it's connection we're losing (losing)
i'll reach my hands through the screen
till i see the spark's out
they're starin' at me; said
"you should be star-bound"
take in the scene
and don't you forget it
the ocean'll sink (sink)
just cause i let it
(let it)

is there even a deeper meaning?
i study her every pattern
i ache then break but they don't seem to take it as a heavy matter
and that's hefty ladder that i'm probably gonna climb forever
and if she goes i let her
and if she goes i let-

kay, i've opened the shades
i thought it was grace, i guess that it's hate
fool me once and take my change
no wonder why i feel the same
fool me twice; i'll start anew
my misfortune falls right back to you
the scent of colors fill my room
to numb my taste and feed me truth

(truth)(4x)
i don't know what does it mean to you..
what do i mean to you? (you-you)
what do i mean to you
you-you-you-you

i feel like i can touch hades
but the thought of you's the only thing that's kept me saving
from all the bloodshed
i take it all in
i let that deep breath
enter my skin
i haven't felt formaldehyde in a while
it's become so difficult to work up a smile
hit me back if i'm worth every mile
i used to believe what i wanted was peace
but when i open my mouth i feel like a mime

i feel like a mime (4x)
(i feel like a mime...)
(am i wasting my time?)

feed me truth [prod. death]

[+ Tosha]

1st - @user-411557229 
2nd - @northshoremusic 
3rd - @emptychest 
4th - @torvamia 
5th - @strivemusicau 
6th - @caspywaspy 
7th - @soulfadexo 
8th - @x1fern 
9th - @noxious-nights 
10th - @navyxower 
11th - @shizukesaaa 
12th - @hoeplessboy

Holding Onto Something [+ Tosha x Kev]

introduction
prod/ft my good friend @greenwood2000
<3

lyrics:
something was stolen
something i borrowed
must’ve been open
must’ve been hollow
& open progression
is nothing but awful
i trample my thoughts
till they’re tougher to swallow

its passion that kills you,
the nerve’s gonna drive you insane
i can’t stand to look back
when the only thing there is your name
i took this as a loss
when i should’ve been counting the days
its a wish on a star
you’re the one thing that’s keeping me sane
i’m losing this game
when you’re learning to lose
well, the world isn’t spinning the same

greenwood:
I put some distance out into the worlds
And I never trip about the way that it hurts
And I think they buried me deep in the dirt
But trust me, and trust me it still could get worse

Seventeen years in a hospital bed 
And they treat me different I know what it is
And it'd take a year to explain what it did
When I got a phantom inside of my limbs

Closed down, held over
And I found the worst way to tell you
And I couldn't leave but I'd let you
And tell me you think I'll be dead soon

Held down, I'm closer
And I found the best way to end it
And I didn't sleep just pretended
And fucked up my life like your friends said

its passion that kills you,
the nerve’s gonna drive you insane
(cant take back what i said, 
im the one you can blame)
i can’t stand to look back
when the only thing there is your name
(not the man in your heart,
he had went with the pain)
i took this as a loss
when i should’ve been counting the days
(its a pattern i keep,
wish i’d throw it away)
its a wish on a star
you’re the one thing that’s keeping me sane
(i know its too late)
i’m losing this game
when you’re learning to lose
well, the world isn’t spinning the same

learning to lose

learning to lose w/ greenwood

Artist:
@autumndropsdead

Lyrics:
not lost in the first place
was i ever found to begin with?
it was you i began with
if clarity's currency, then i've got nothing to spend with..
nothing to spend with.
so i just blunder my brain, and then i stumble away
uttering words you shouldn't hear anyways..
do i make a difference
if the outcome's the same?

tenacious nature; i watch as it wins
he's the thorn in your side
that was once your own kin
all i know, is what i don't
i don't, i don't, i-
core of concrete, gelatin skin
how i'd fall through the floor, just to soar once again
i fought for..
just what did i fight for?

so
sunder did the sky
sacrifice my time
let it bleed; i'm fine
am i?
you'll heal in a moment
just put all your weight on me
'cause we're just living notions
despite the cause, i know that you're in front of me
"it's been so damn long since you left me"
stuck here, tied in knots trying to let me breathe
but i've lost empathy

i took for granted
what was given
learnt my lesson;
till i caved in
ship's abandoned
have i lost heart?
said, it's my decision
the dark has such lonely arms

tenacious nature; i watch as it wins
he's the thorn in your side
that was once your own kin
all i know, is what i don't
i don't, i don't, i-
core of concrete, gelatin skin
how i'd fall through the floor, just to soar once again
i fought for..
what hurt even more.

gelatin skin

autumndropsdead - gelatin skin

LYRICS:

I'm too fucked up to be in public
Anxious at the function, got this feeling in my stomach
I see people dancing drunk, in a few hours they'll be fucking
But I'll go home alone and fall asleep; remember nothing
Baby, waking up is such a chore
I'm always high or else I'm bored
I gotta pick myself up off the floor
One day I'll see the world (and I'll see)

One day, I'll wake up and I won't have a headache
Chest pains, blame it on the drugs or on the heartbreak
Today, I woke up and I don't feel right
I guess I'll try again in the next life
One day, I'll wake up and I won't have a headache
Chest pains, blame it on the drugs or on the heartbreak
Today, I woke up and I don't feel right
I guess I'll try again in the next life

I don't wanna talk, I wanna end it, no discussion
Give me everything I wanted, I'll return it like it's nothing
Make it back tomorrow night and go to heaven in the morning
The devil's in the book, but I'm too good at telling stories
So I wake up, say a little prayer for all the dead ones
Take one, and stay the fuck away from all the fake love
Guess I'll make it through somehow
Tell me, darling, how soon is now?

I don't know what the fuck to call it
I'm always in withdrawal, I'm like a fucking alcoholic
But with you it's something special, I can tell that's why I lost it
I don't wanna talk, honestly, wish I went to college
Cuz I'm sick of all the run-around
You hate my guts, I hate this town
I hate the things I write about
Cuz soon we'll all be dead (but fuck it maybe)

One day, I'll wake up and I won't have a headache
Chest pains, blame it on the drugs or on the heartbreak
Today, I woke up and I don't feel right
I guess I'll try again in the next life
One day, I'll wake up and I won't have a headache
Chest pains, blame it on the drugs or on the heartbreak
Today, I woke up and I don't feel right
I guess I'll try again in the next life

ONE DAY

shoutout my homie for bein on this! @notaheroo

lyrics:

i’ve been drowning my sorrows in the bottom of bottles
she said i should relax and not to go full throttle 
baby just calm down and i’ll be gone by tomorrow
you say your heart has been hollowed

but have you looked at me lately?
i’m the one who needs a saving grace
her eyes they pierce so painfully
i see your face and i’m back in that place

they’ve left me with nowhere to go
i’ve been broken down and on my own
my shoulders are crushed from the weight of it all

and you’ve been laughing at me waiting for me to fall
and i lack the motivation to force myself to crawl
you held back information knowing that it’s your fault
clarification is shown behind the walls
a now known revelation planned to kill my soul

it’s hard not to fold 
underneath the mold
of what i was always told and what i’m feeling
the seasons are changing again

oh, changing again
oh, can you tell me where the times been?

(notahero)

can u hear me coming baby?
open up the front door
i know time is infinite
but i don’t think i got much more
my bones and back grow sore
u tell me i should fight
pain gets defied when i look up in ur eyes
sorrow gets diffused into energy all u gotta do is fight
it’s hard enough waking up
be my saving grace tonight
anxiety riddles me when i feel my lungs fucking up
the pressure belittle me when i don’t think that i’m blowing up
but riddle me this baby
how come i ain’t never show no signs of giving up?

full throttle w/ notahero (R3DQX x Luffy)

ohh
it’s been a long time
and i swear that i still miss you
guess you’re happy now
after all that we have been through
a long time
but i still can’t help but miss you
once you’re happy love
doesn’t matter if i’m still blue..

is it the medicine
cause i feel so numb
saw your ghost smile in the rearview
a smile i wish i woke to

i’d do anything
now to feel that loved
cause god i fucking miss u
hope you feel the same too :/

i hope u found the high u always would chase
i hope it’s worth all the love that we had put to the grave
and when the reaper came back for it
i just couldn’t say your name
cause i had promised it was dead
i guess i lied to his face

oh oh
promised it was dead oh
need my head next to your head love :(
otherwise i cannot wake up...

i still miss you [tnvr]

~2300~

@lilskeleskrrt @slmnmore

Lyrics:

[HOOK]
I’m on the borderline
Seen death in my sleep
Tell me there’s more to life 
I’m in your crosshair
Pull the trigger let it fly
It’s me and you tonight
I’ll be my own demise
And you won't see the signs

[skele]
i always do this every month should prolly heal up
i think you need me too much
i think i want you no love
painting the wall red maroon
dreams of the champagne
“i do”
know my heart bled
leave you
it’s so hard to see you
i need you here tonight
put the nine up to my skull
i wanna feel alive
hold me until i’m close
i’m saying why do you keep me around 
i always weigh you down
it’s not the way that i want
to make you feel stuck
baby i won’t make a sound 
need you to cover my mouth 
put my head to the gun
and let the steel touch
this is so fucked
you used to love me so much

[HOOK]
I’m on the borderline
Seen death in my sleep
Tell me there’s more to life 
I’m in your crosshair
Pull the trigger let it fly
It’s me and you tonight
I’ll be my own demise
And you won't see the signs 
I’m on the borderline
Seen death in my sleep
Tell me there’s more to life 
I’m in your crosshair
Pull the trigger let it fly
It’s me and you tonight
I’ll be my own demise
And you won't see the signs

[VITO]
Watch ‘em labor away
They’re digging the grave i’ll lay in 
Counting the days i’ve been
Just wasting away
Unfazed by your influence
You saw what it coulda been
But i’m drained out i’ve been hollow since 
Not a lot of those options left
Can you deal with the consequence?
I’ve never been good at this
Nine lives I ain’t got one left
You threw all your caution west
Still breaking your promises

ONE DAY

Shiki XO

Recent comments

raine Δ

safehaven.

︻╦̵̵͇̿̿̿̿╤─- - -N̶o̶v̶a̶x̶c̶i̶n̶a̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ - -ˎˊ-

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