i close my eyes
im too high i cant sleep
i was alive
but dead when u found me
u became friends with the enemy
i dont like the way that u do things
you wont change 
what the point in all of this?
talking to a wall
you dont give love its opposite
i dont like the way that u do things
i dont like the way that u do things

im jus speaking with my chest
i wanna runaway from this music
and one day go start fresh
cuz i think im starting 2 lose it
and my mind starts to forget
and idk if this music 
will make it any better

everyday im feeling less
got zero time and so much stress
i wonder when this all gon end
i hope that its soon idk tho
idk tho
hopefully my life gon change
where the lights go?

and im feeling so cold
and idk where 2 go
slowly losing home
so i got no hope

all them years have passed 
counting cash
im on the high road
i wish love would last
falling flat
girl im so done
ill have a heart attack
karmas back, give it to me
and ive been waiting for the day
but the days seem the same 2 me

i close my eyes
im too high i cant sleep
i was alive
but dead when u found me
u became friends with the enemy
i dont like the way that u do things
you wont change 
what the point in all of this?
talking to a wall
you dont give love its opposite
i dont like the way that u do things
i dont like the way that u do things

enemy [under the maple tree]

conversation, we should give it up
i think im struggling to fight you
and theres no need for me to act so tough
id throw my life away to find you
and we can stop, tell me its enough
inflict all the damage you want
you can bruise my bones and be rough
id never tell you to stop

this is the only time i get to hear you
ive wasted all my life, trying to see you
and i dont go outside, cause im ashamed to
id rather stay and hide, its what im bound to

bound

and she then text me saying  “fair enough”
i didnt think that u was scared of anything 
so tell me baby are u scared to love ?
i typed out like fuckin everythin 
and then she text me she said “fair enough” 

2 pills all night im slippin 
lc nah i never had bring ins 
and the lights too bright 
for my eyes, head spinnin 
poured sprite all night 
half 9 still sippin 

tell me what are we baby are u just a friend to me
she told me what do you want we can have it your way jus tell me what u wanna be 
i said that’s cool i just think that we jus need to slow down n take it slow so what u tellin me
she said ive gotta go now ill be sure to come round tomorrow night got somewhere to be 
i said fair enough

FAIR ENOUGH (SCOTTYSPLASH)

"one day we gon be okay baby just stay"
i can hear just how you told me like its yesterday
ill be sure to send my love from the cosmos
i guess lately its just been harder hitting high notes
i guess lately its just been easier to let my mind go
i guess lately im feeling bad bout dragging you along

cuz i dont want to see you at the bottom
and baby you can tell me if its too much
i know i can be a lot so you just say som
and i dont like myself if we need something to agree on
im up making songs fell asleep with my jeans on
i can tell you love me from the way you take my jeans off
id love if youd stick with me ill look better when i wean off
the same songs just in different styles
you wonder when i been this happy girl its been a while

but i cant make you smile
havent seen those pearly whites girl whats got you down
we can live another life if we leave this town
one day i can make it right one day youll be proud
in the passenger seat found my reason in the stars
i got holes in my jeans you got anger in your heart
its not as easy as it seems so i try to play my part
control alt then you deleted me im back here at the start
i got bad lungs one more cigarette
another sad song posted on the internet
i guess its not fun tell myself im not upset
when the days done find a place to lay my head
from the day we met swore to be my best
we both know the fire started when you call my friends
now im only feeling sorry for the shit i said
one day imma be a star im just not shining yet

and baby you can tell me if its too much
i know i can be a lot so you just say som
and i dont like myself if we need something to agree on
im up making songs fell asleep with my jeans on
i can tell you love me from the way you take my jeans off
id love if youd stick with me ill look better when i wean off
the same songs just in different styles
you wonder when i been this happy girl its been a while

denim w/ halfhearted (p. under the maple tree)

Lyrics-

I said I’m fine 
Like fuck ok 
What do you want from me 
I locked myself in here and I don’t want no company 
The silent sense of solitude was kinda comforting 
The end is just outside 
This time I feel that it has come for me 

 I just  can’t escape 
All of the calamity thrown in my face 
Shit I got enough on my plate 
But i eat it up and dont leave non to waste 
And honestly id rather rot in this hell
Than ever step foot inch’s out of my shell
Im comfortable here as if you couldn’t tell 
Now I’m getting tired of repeating myself 

I said I’m fine 
Like fuck ok 
What do you want from me 
I locked myself in here and I don’t want no company 
The silent sense of solitude was kinda comforting 
The end is just outside 
This time I feel that it has come for me

calamity p. wraithontheporch

made 3 years ago so i’m dropping it by itself instead of in the collab ep 💕 s/o @user-411557229

nowadays ion go out
city look like a ghost town
3 digits on the dash
check my phone for the comedown
how it feel to be alone now

if i keep it down, never make a sound
call log empty but the bottle aint
staying quiet now, yet this silence loud
left the read receipts on my overlay
then act surprised when friends gotta leave
fuck it never said that you had to stay
in fact better yet fuckin hit the books
cuz it’s nothin left 2 say n drugs to take

she told me hop off the adderall
we just not meant to be after all
i’ll be somewhere in the night time
cause ur not urself when there’s alcohol
i got sum thoughts i aint said yet
swear this codeine got me touchin sunsets
i got purple stains all in the bedspread
and i’ll be by myself till i drop dead
baby i’ll get back 2 you in the morning
i know to you that my life ain’t important
took away shit that was making me numb
blade drip my blood and it paint in the portrait
nowadays when it’s dark out
see ur face with the same doubt
leave that bitch in the past
and leave my name out of ur mouth

nowadays ion go out
city look like a ghost town
3 digits on the dash
check my phone for the comedown
how it feel to be alone now

spectre w/ residential.

prod ilyl1ght

lyrics:
Oh haven't seen your face
And the sky is turning grey
sucks you dont think about me daily 
It must be nice to think your not going crazy 
staying home all day don’t wanna go out anymore 
sleeping in all day have fun being a whore 
I wonder what is like having people that care
I wonder what it’s like having somebody there
I wish that I was no longer here
Now the plan is just to go disappear

Oh haven't seen your face
And the sky is turning grey
sucks you dont think about me daily 
It must be nice to think your not going crazy 
Oh haven't seen your face
And the sky is turning grey
want you to go but I want you to stay here because I’m in love
You should probably go cause I’m building up anger that’s not good for us
Why is everybody pointing out on my flaws?
sucks to think that we’re all human but you don’t give a fuck
sucks to think that we’re all human but you don’t give a

sorry

i might be over it

her patterns are much prettier than mine
evolves down her hair to her spine
but ive been waiting all this time
how could i compare it to any of mine

is it safe love
you dont lie?
cause i cant help but not feel your type
and youre waiting, but i dont mind
if im honestly not what you like

so call me
call me back home
im poorly 
poorly and cold
so tell me 
tell me im enough
hate me
hate me all you want

i hate to remember 
its haunting me now
im used like a puppet youre dragging me round
im viewed like a peasant, im serving you well
but what is my purpose i really cant tell

i changed, is that enough for you ?
and ill wait, contort my body to be
whatever you want
whatever you want
whatever you want
whatever you want

i cant make this worth your time
run right past me i wont mind 
far behind everyone in life
cut my skin, reveal my spite
tore my biceps, fuel my eyes
still cant see past all ive tried
now its nearly the end, but ive hardly begin
my finish line is closer
youve got further to run

patterns

produced by @nevermadeithome & @prodjolst ✨ 

when you open your eyes 
there’s a message from me
it says “good morning baby girl”
and “how did you sleep? 
did you pack yet? can you call and when are you free?
and im sorry i was fucked up the whole week”
i’m adjusting, feeling this is not normal for me 
i feel disgusting but i’m cool whenever we speak 
you love your coffee, i’ve always been more fond of a tea
you love your hockey, i’m learning girl just be patient with me, please 

and stay happy cus you’re moving tomorrow
so pack up all those mugs
return the books that you borrowed
it’s a double edged sword i know there’s some sorrow
but your dad’ll be fine
i know it sucks but you gotta go
5 nights on the road with a carload 
on the way to BC just avoid all the potholes
when you’re in your tent all alone with a bottle
and you’re lookin up at stars
i hope you know that your moms right there 

when you’re down baby please will you tell me?
i’ve been gone lately, i know it doesn’t help things 
don’t feel bad girl it’s not your cross to carry
i’m under mud from the weight that ive buried
you’re honestly fucking pretty damn amazing
a lots changed but i’ve always said the same things
“its not fate” i tell myself, then it kills me
you honestly will never know how much youve helped me :( 

when you open your eyes 
there’s a message from me
it says “good morning baby girl”
and “how did you sleep? 
did you pack yet? can you call and when are you free?
and im sorry i was fucked up the whole week”
i’m adjusting, feeling this is not normal for me 
i feel disgusting but i’m cool whenever we speak 
you love your coffee, i’ve always been more fond of a tea
you love your hockey, i’m learning girl just be patient with me, please

canada (nevermadeithome x jolst)

fighting for a life that i
do not want
ill cover my eyes and ill shake it off
howd i wake up wishing
i never did
scared of almost everything
youll probably set me off
anxiety is crazy bro
like i can barely talk
howd i wake up wishing
i wont again

im hopeless
you beat me just to know who i am
i think im losing
arrested by the palm of your hand
imprisoned
you held me there to judge who i am
you think im losing
Du sahst mein Schweigen nie als Schrei

how many more times do i have to say to you
that im fine with it
youll lie again
surely its so obvious that all ive ever wanted
was to die again
ill hide again

im so scared of the future
i dont know
how to reduce it to nothing
running around in my head
im sure
if i told you what i planned for
call me delusional
im bored
fighting for a life

im hopeless
you beat me just to know who i am
i think im losing
arrested by the palm of your hand
imprisoned
you held me there to judge who i am
you think im losing
Du sahst mein Schweigen nie als Schrei

imprison

looking for me

'Sin-Shi'

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