your new favorite enemies to lovers anthem, from yours truly. available on all streaming platforms! here is a masterlist of my links to find me everywhere — https://www.campsite.bio/faithzap

lyrics:
[verse 1]
if everybody was dead
i still wouldn't want you
i guess humanity's dying off
but i heard what you said
i can't get rid of you
you're in all of my late night thoughts

[pre-chorus]
i don't know what i would say
if you asked me on a date
would i scream and run away?
or would i say yes?
do you even feel the same?
wish i could see inside your brain
i wonder what it would contain
but if i had to guess

[chorus]
i think maybe you hate my guts
but you also wanna fall in love
think about holding hands in a theater 
or running me over with your four-wheeler
but maybe it's not that at all
and it was always only me who'd fall for you
even though i don't like you
isn't that what we're supposed to do?

[verse 2]
if everybody found out
i'd have to kill you
cause i don't want things to change
i don't know when it started, but i know there's something
and i wish i could stop it
but i guess i'm just too late

[pre-chorus]
i don't know what you would say
if i asked you on a date
would you scream and run away?
or would you say yes?
do you even feel the same?
wish i could see inside your brain
i wonder what it would contain, but if i had to guess

[chorus]
i think maybe you hate my guts
but you also wanna fall in love
think about holding hands in a theater 
or running me over with your four-wheeler
but maybe it's not that at all
and it was always only me who'd fall for you
even though i don't like you
isn't that what we're supposed to do?

[bridge]
you hate me, i hate you
but i like you, i don't want to
you hate me, i hate you
but i like you, i don't want to
you hate me, i hate you
but i like you, i don't want to
you hate me, i hate you
but i like you, i don't want to
you hate me, i hate you
but i like you, i don't want to
you hate me, i hate you
but i like you, i don't want to

[chorus]
i think maybe you hate my guts
but you also wanna fall in love
think about holding hands in a theater 
or running me over with your four-wheeler
but maybe it's not that at all
and it was always only me who'd fall for you
even though i don't like you
isn't that what we're supposed to do?

If Everybody Was Dead

i had a dream 
where you told me
your girlfriend’s having trouble with spelling
and
you once thought
her intellect was raw
but now you’re thinking maybe it’s not 

bukowski bores me
salinger makes me smile
and you adore me
cause i know all the words you like

i sit across from you
and i beg
for you to tell me again and again about
how her wit’s not
quite as refined
as mine, as mine

then i throw the martini glass across the room
it’s just what i wanted but it feels untrue
and you look back so disappointed 
you thought i knew better than to throw a fit

bukowski bores me
salinger makes me smile
and other things i say
when i want to be worth your while

i wake up and the woman in me
wishes i didn’t wish these things

but i’ve always loved
when men tell me
i’m smarter than 
they thought i’d be

franny (voice memo)

Don't talk to me about love

a song I wrote a while back for my favorite place, enjoy!! xx

3am in new york

annie

She's Got You ~ Melanie Martinez

If Your Too Shy to talk to your crush at a Party (1975)

alayna | evann mcintosh

wrote this song about feeling like ur life sucks so u try to romanticize it , and then u flop even at that !! : --) put it together as a lil demo on garageband i really got into the whole 80s pop vibe if u can't tell hope u can get into it too <3

lyrics:
i’m driving to the store in my secondhand car
got five dollars that i stole from a broken down bar
i’ll buy me a lighter and darker eyelashes
to be sure i’ll blow up the next time this crashes

i couldn’t smile straight like the girls on tv
so i’m trying to be sad in a way that is pretty
obsessing on ways to make life more romantic
but observing that it is all just semantics 

oh i’m a con artist within my own life
i’m making greek sculptures with one dullen knife
i pry 
i try 
can’t get it right 

chorus:
is this what you waited for
crying on the bathroom floor
least it makes my eyes look greener
brighten up the washed demeanor
i don’t know but i’ve been told
it gets better getting old
now i’m here and still i’m chasing
down the same clear bottle i’m always wasting

tonight i’m gonna run on the beach with my friends
gonna drink and not think about how it will end
let me photograph it i wanna be captured
to look later when in my personal rapture

we’re laughing til we choke but i wish it was louder
cause in my head i’m hearing a voice that is prouder
it’s telling me that what’s around me’s deception
a lost simulation with glitching connection 

oh i’m a con artist within my own life
i’m making greek sculptures with one dullen knife
i’m prying
trying 
while youthfulness is dying 

chorus

wasting (repeat)

wasting (demo)

i turned 20 today and wrote this as a birthday card of sorts to myself <3 here are the lyrics!:

i never planned on writing this song
i never planned on living this long
i was too busy sitting on everything that's wrong

at the heart of the matter i just had to go
when everything shatters is when you will know
how to be brave when you can't see the way that your blood will flow

chorus:
happy birthday baby
you should know that lately
i'm still afraid but i'm finding reasons to stay
in the mirror standing,
pink lipstick in hand, 
i wrote that when i give love to myself no one can take it away
take it away

all of the memories i've ever had
cover me til i'm a little less sad
like a heavyweight blanket i knit with my tongue from invisible thread

20 years old seemed like death at 13
i didn't think i could be both real and clean
and i'm not quite there yet but i'm steady dancing the in between

chorus

happy birthday
happy birthday
if it's not enough to stay
i love you anyway

happy birthday (voice memo)

lil ode to unlearning internalized misogyny <3

lyrics:
pretty girl on the t
you look much cooler than me, so i hate you
it's not you, it's not me
it's just the strange race we both were put into 
before we born
guinea pigs with ribbons torn
competing for a spot
that's not even that warm

it's just got a lot of men who say:
"you're the best, you're the best
you're not like the rest
you trampled them over just to lay on our chest"
and i hate to see me do it 
all of us are losing 
i blame it on being depressed

cause if i'm not the prettiest girl at the bar 
then wtf is the point
i wanna be the nicest thing to look it 
since nobody likes my noise
well maybe when i get skinny
or when i get hotter
when i know myself better
i won't be so bothered by
every girl who i've ever thought of 
as having her shit figured out
til then i'm tryna find the hottest way to pout
open the car door, i wanna get out

nascar barbie (voice memo)

the cherie on top🍒

💌mail me @ songsfromesme@gmail.com

wasting (demo)

Esmé