produced by xona 

@heylog

-lyrics-
I wanna run but I can’t deny
feelin dread to our trust and I cry
and I would get everything for you
she loves him but I’m just that fool
I wanted us back, you didn’t want that
I’m pleading with this pain I held
and now I fall back
all on my prozac’s
and I just hope that I get your help

and now I’m washed up all alone
the little essence that you left long ago
the flowers wilt down to my floor
push me down like I’m nothing more

and I don’t wish the best for you
you wanted healing but I was see through
you wanted blood, now you got it on view
many voices telling me on what I knew
there’s reflections that portray all of us 
you’re sick of me and the things that I love 
I won’t forget what it meant for us
these 6 letters that stuck like a drug

stab me again i won't feel a thing
hold me down this some sentencing
taking my bliss, more apologies
i don't like this, just don't talk to me
wasting away i'm never calling you back
i'm stuck with memories i won't forget
with all this weight i carry on my back
you did this to me and i will never forgive

you
oh
i hate 
you
with
every little gut in my body

WALKING UP TO HEAVEN I CANNOT BELIEVE I'M HERE
BUT WHY AM I STILL RUNNING FROM THIS NEVER ENDING FEAR
I'M SHIFTING THROUGH LANES WHILE UR STILL STUCK IN 2ND GEAR
SURPRISING EVERYONE LIKE 2 HEADLIGHTS ON A DEER
WASTING AWAY I'M NEVER CALLING YOU BACK
I'M STUCK WITH MEMORIES I WON'T FORGET
(forget)
WITH ALL THIS WEIGHT I CARRY ON MY BACK 
YOU DID THIS TO ME AND I HATE YOU FOR THAT

you
oh
i hate you
with
every little gut in my body

i wont forget

spotify

i won't forget w/ heylog

by https://soundcloud.com/heylog

lyrics:
please don't leave
i hold so much grief
and i loved your voice
ur not here so there's no point
ur a liar, it's in your name
i had no idea your two-faced
gonna die here for ur sake
ur actions tell me u were brave
and i thought that i knew u
i guess i don't
u can say if i'm annoying too
cause i know
got a lot i need to figure out
i'm trying so
i believe there ain't no stopping now
i'm on the ropes
the corners made of cobwebs
the widows home
sometimes she comes to visit me
through the holes
and she say "what're you doing here, you look alone"
and i say that i'm developing and in the zone
accept no apologies ur just too late
split my heart in half now it goes two ways
exhausted, i need to say goodbye
i love it when there's peace and when it's quiet

suffocate in feelings
it's 100% my decision
whether if i should just let it go
but the sadness keeps filling
(it never ends)
made no progress
i got so much time to stall with
but i don't know how to manage it
produce on my own and abolish
ur attitude is contagious
i rub it off but u kept staying
and i let u walk all over me
i should've stood my ground
i ain't no man i am weak

i mean nothing to u now
cus i feel it through the text
oh how u love to talk about yourself
well no one likes a narcissist
these lines i split
slowly vanish from my wrist
and i tried to hide what i did
now the planks are rotting on our bridge
but how can i get u to change your mind
well babe i'm never ever fine
only for a sec, depression prys
swear the gap is crushing on my life
ur a liar, it's in your name
i had no idea ur two-faced
gonna die here for your sake
ur actions tell me u were brave
please don't leave
i hold so much grief
and i loved your voice
ur not here so there's no point

veins

the widows home

SPOTIFY

heylog - the widows home

Prod @Sinxi
Feat @hiraethsry

LYRICS
Got me so alone
Even from the start
Way you pick me up
Speeding in ya car
To afraid to speak
Leave it in the dark
Trying aimlessly
See into the stars
Got me so in love
An evil demon in disguise
Way you fucked me up
A trance to put in with your eyes
This girls a succubus can tell the way she fucking lies
But I Just can't say no to girls who make me wanna try

I don't love you I gotta make it stop
No lust moves half the time we on
And fuck you you take my fucking arms
Got me spinning hate the feeling
I trust you what makes you wanna start
I don't love you i gotta make it stop
I don't fuck you we gotta make it stop
No ones healing hate the feeling

When your with him i know your thinking of me
I'm only 2 drinks deep
I put his head in the sink
I'm tryna
Fight him
So im gritting my teeth
And man he should have stopped talking
He could never be me
I wanna
Leave him to the pavement
There's dirt where his face is
Fuck him while ur thinking of me
Do i deserve this?
Why you gotta lie when you leave
I'm feeling worthless
Stab me with a knife
Till i bleed along the surface

I don't love you I gotta make it stop
No lust moves half the time we on
And fuck you you take my fucking arms
Got me spinning hate the feeling
I trust you what makes you wanna start
I don't love you i gotta make it stop
I don't fuck you we gotta make it stop
No ones healing hate the feeling

Spotify

SUCCUBUS (feat. hiraeth)

https://open.spotify.com/album/2erLjZg3vJPYobdmKrexhW?si=Iu-yZ4N-Qc-Ec5v5DKoxrg

prod. @deademane

(heylog)
between the glass
is filled with poison
i feel like trash
apply the ointment
just stay back
he needs some time alone
cus through the cracks
is the widows home
don't come inside here
i would bounce
we're not alive here
don't stick around
when ur minds clear
come in the house
cus i'm not safe here
so get me out

don't come inside here
you might fear
people always die here
bloods along the cabinets
he sacrificed a lot here
everything was gone he loved
and now there's nothing left here
he said he wants to make a change
so he cuts every piece of hair
don't come inside here
you might fear
everybody dies here
walls are colored red
and i see bodies lying everywhere
roam around the room
can you tell there's nothing left here
you're quick to quit imagining
that you brought me inside of here

(casperrr)
oh she
she is lying thru her teeth
i swear that she wants to kill me
lay with my lifeless body
while staring at the ceiling
her actions are deceiving
she cuts herself she's bleeding
the blood is running and she really
fucking loves to see it

welcome to the widows home
there's cracks and holes in every wall
the emptyness fills all those holes
this place really tourments my soul
but you can't leave neither can i
i'll go into a room and cry
i'll try to just make up my mind
cut my hair lock myself inside

there's nowhere to go to now
there's no1 to save you now

(heylog + casperrr)
don't come inside here
you might fear
people always die here
bloods along the cabinets
he sacrificed a lot here
everything was gone he loved
and now there's nothing left here
he said he wants to make a change
so he cuts every piece of hair
don't come inside here
you might fear
everybody dies here
walls are colored red
and i see bodies lying everywhere
roam around the room
can you tell there's nothing left here
you're quick to quit imagining
that you brought me inside of here

casperrr x heylog - there's nothing left here (deademane)

prod by king theta
w/ @caspywaspy

lyrics:
i just want to be home
i dont want to be here
i just wanna hold close
and i feel it in my bones
u said "thats how it goes"
ur inside is where u beauty grows

i fell down 
but u picked me right up
when i have a frown
ur still by my side
when i feel low
to the point i cant go
u pick me right up
ur a one of a kind

but i know why u were kind
and i know why u were so nice
u just wanted my soul
u just wanted to take control
of everything i had left
u just wanted my blood
u just wanted my trust 
so u can ruin everything i had left

casperrr:
i thought you loved me
i was such a fool 
so i let you destroy me
u became so rude 
colder than ice
but hotter than fire
im the one u despise
and ur the one i desire

leave me here to die
alone in my bedroom
stab me by surprise
leave me when the moons full

stezzyxl w/ casperrr:
but i know why u were kind
and i know why u were so nice
u just wanted my soul
u just wanted to take control
of everything i had left
u just wanted my blood
u just wanted my trust 
so u can ruin everything i had left

eyes w/ casperrr

please dont leave me now
i cant be alone
i cant go out on my own
i get so worked up crawling through the mud
i dont think i can get out

wait
im asleep
when i wake
ill forget
ill get up
draw a breath
try to make you understand me

these things take time
i get it
im not the one who said it
make me believe you meant it
trying to not regret it

worked up

<3
i cut up our pictures
theyll never last
and even tho i miss you
im never coming back oh

she call me im insensitive
i never mean to hurt tho
she say ima hermit
whatevers coming
i deserve it bro
i smell something burning
the bridges down
and the tables turned
i feel so uncomfortable
no matter what its head to toe
i still got her pheromones
i keep putting her jacket on
ask me how im feeling
i jus fake a smile and knod it off

so im tossing and turning our bridge burnt down
can you gimme one good reason i should stick around yeah
no i wont give you one goodbye
dont know whats ahead of me
so i wont take no ones advice
dont project your shit up onto me
i dont know what i wanna be
and i dont care whos that fond of me
this shit right here is my everything
i need a pen and paper to tell you
all the things i sacrificed in my life for this
itd be a long list with a lot of bullshit right now that i really miss

so tell me what the fuck you mean
i wear my heart all on my sleeve
i open up to everyone i ever meet
and then they always fucking leave
except the last one yeah thats all my fault
i wont blame anyone but myself
i cant drag you down with me if i dont make it outta this fucking hell
that dont mean i dont miss your smile
or the way you looked in my eyes
how the fuck you calling me selfish i was worried bout you the whole time
dont put your faith in me
im a bad bet to gamble with
dancing with the devil at your door with the candle lit woo
issa cold world tell me what your living for
i see the signs everywhere its too hard to ignore
and i hate myself enough for the both of us
just let me go
i swear to god this is never what i wanted
hit my phone i let it ring
sabotaging everything
yeah i lost my best friend and a part of me
i wont see again
still holding on to the last bits
ill make sure the last pieces fit
fucked up in my head but i know one day it wont mean shit

the good the bad and the ugly

THE GOOD THE BAD AND THE UGLY [p. recyclebin+irby]

guitar by melonmusik

lyrics:
seeing your face by my window
its making me happy you dont know
winter coming my heart decline
baby calling my heart feels fine
sing a carol at christmas time
she dont care at all she never was mine
i dont wanna be here the rest of my life
i might be here cause i dont wanna change my mind
always getting locked down everytime i try
tell that whore to stay away another waste of time
oh baby so gloomy, oh baby your still glue to me
its coming better unleash, get it through to you better haunt me
I FEEL SICK I LOST A FRIEND THAT I WANTED TO TALK TO
she dont care at all she never was mine
GIVE ME THE ICK THEN TELL ME YOU DONT EVEN WANT TO
im getting sick telling you that i want you
i feel like a prick but it goes on without you
just another slip my judgement clouded you
your such a little bitch, mum and daddy even fucking proud of you
she dont care at all she never was mine
i dont wanna be here the rest of my life
i might be here cause i dont wanna change my mind
always getting locked down everytime i try
tell that whore to stay away another waste of time

without you

produced by @hiraethsry & @sinxi

lyrics:

questioning on why im alive
i feel my heart i feel a fright
im running from it always running
always tend to forget how im learning
stuff my face full of it now im grounded
in a room full of steam i feel crowded
finding comfort in the seam of my jacket
pull it closer hair between so i can have it
will i ever your meaning on the surface
maybe wipe the screen and just learn there
no ones ever there till your gone
no ones gonna feel the rip into ur arm

im going through fields
scared that i might break my seal
life mate is getting too real
feel like i live in a film
what if we live in a film
i swear its written out
what if i love just to die
i dont have my questions right

i think to myself
i speak to my own
i sing for myself
she dont care at all
she wont pick up when i call
she wont show no love at all
she is tired of emotions
are you not tired of this

im going through fields
scared that i might break my seal
life mate is getting too real
feel like i live in a film
what if we live in a film
i swear its written out
what if i love just to die
i dont have my questions right

absent

bubbles /
depends, can you go fuck yourself

hira /
i can see a lot of shit coming out of you 
throwing hands until my face turns a darker blue
the evil in your eyes is pouring out of you
i still wonder why, im never mad at you

you could have some decency 
left me vacant while youre down on your knees
i should be more patient 
but its hard to be
when youre out fucking anybody that

breathes

is it too much to ask for your time
love my patience is walking the line
save me
its not like youd try
fell too close
breaking my spine

too close i feel like an option
i keep tryna run girl 
run into the forest
i could use some safety
are you tryna hold me?
stop shaking
eyes are getting blurry

i dont trust nobody
but i saw you as family
its getting too warm im struggling to breathe
its blatant im nothing to see

i can see a lot of shit coming out of you 
throwing hands until my face turns a darker blue
the evil in your eyes is pouring out of you
i still wonder why, im never mad at you

you could have some decency 
left me vacant while youre down on your knees
i should be more patient 
but its hard to be
when youre out fucking anybody that

breathes

breathe

produced by me

lyrics:
wanna be alone cause it's quiet
locked up in my room, no more fighting
plug both of my ears, hear no riot
put away my feelings, no more crying

no talk
thorns out
mask on
happy home

always feel ignored and nobody wanna take me
seriously for once, why you think I'm always faking
walk around my   room with no purpose, thoughts are pacing
wish I had the guts, cause the future fucking scares me

always feel ignored and nobody wanna take me
seriously for once, why you think I'm always faking
walk around my room with no purpose, thoughts are pacing
wish I had the guts, cause the future fucking scares me

don't go the way I went cause you'll end up with scars
I just want a piece of quiet, is it too much to ask?
rarely check up on my phone, cause it's filled with demands
I can't meet ur expectations, you been asking too much

please stop yelling, I've been trying
please stop pushing, please stop fighting
I dont wanna see you crying
I just wanna feel 
(at home)

eyes w/ casperrr

Stezzyxl

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