This piece has its origins from the sleeping sounds of my daughter. Here we are on the borderline between sleep and wakefulness. What can be heard and what is hidden under other sounds.

Distractions

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Beatrice speaks with Jane Thomason of National Nurses United (NNU) about the Trump administration’s disbanding of the CDC’s HICPAC committee, the body that oversees infection control practices across the healthcare industry — and a committee that Jane was briefly involved with as part of an advisory workgroup since last summer. We also discuss the Trump administration’s staggering cuts across NIOSH, a key agency for workplace health and safety protections, and their significance within the broader “MAHA” agenda.

Jane Thomason is NNU’s lead industrial hygienist. She was last on the show in March 2024 and August 2023 to speak about a campaign against proposed infection control cuts being considered by HICPAC, after which she was added to a HICPAC workgroup that May. Jane returns today now that, with HICPAC disbanded, she’s once again able to speak more openly about committee deliberations.

Find NNU's call to action letter about NIOSH here:
https://nnu.org/saveniosh

Runtime 1:09:48

Note: We're back! Thank you to everyone for all the well wishes and many kind messages during our parental leave. We have a lot coming together soon processing current events and reacting to some big developments that happened while we were away. As we ramp production back up we'll be prioritizing the patron feed first to make sure patrons get a full new episode every week.

Get Health Communism here: www.versobooks.com/books/4081-health-communism

Find Jules' new book here: https://www.versobooks.com/products/3054-a-short-history-of-trans-misogyny

Find Tracy's book Abolish Rent here: https://www.haymarketbooks.org/books/2443-abolish-rent

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Teaser - The Pro-Infection Presidency w/ Jane Thomason (06/02/25)

Life doesn’t always offer clear answers. In this calming audio reflection, we explore how to find steadiness in uncertain times — with tiny rituals, emotional regulation tools, mindset shifts, and self-compassion.

🧠✨ Discover how AI therapy tools and Connected Care can support your growth.
👉 Download the Ava Mind app now and explore mental health support on your terms:

📱 iOS: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/ava-mind/id6479784703
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Finding Stability in Uncertainty — A Grounding Reflection from Ava Mind

Note: We are back from parental leave! This episode was originally released June 2nd for Death Panel patrons and is being unlocked today for the first time. To support the show and help make episodes like this one possible, become a patron at www.patreon.com/deathpanelpod

Beatrice speaks with Jane Thomason of National Nurses United (NNU) about the Trump administration’s disbanding of the CDC’s HICPAC committee, the body that oversees infection control practices across the healthcare industry — and a committee that Jane was briefly involved with as part of an advisory workgroup since last summer. We also discuss the Trump administration’s staggering cuts across NIOSH, a key agency for workplace health and safety protections, and their significance within the broader “MAHA” agenda.

Find NNU's call to action letter about NIOSH here:
https://nnu.org/saveniosh

Jane Thomason is NNU’s lead industrial hygienist. She was last on the show in March 2024 and August 2023 to speak about a campaign against proposed infection control cuts being considered by HICPAC, after which she was added to a HICPAC workgroup that May. Jane returns today now that, with HICPAC disbanded, she’s once again able to speak more openly about committee deliberations.

Find our book Health Communism here: www.versobooks.com/books/4081-health-communism

Find Jules' latest book, A Short History of Trans Misogyny, here: https://www.versobooks.com/products/3054-a-short-history-of-trans-misogyny

Find Tracy's book, Abolish Rent, here: www.haymarketbooks.org/books/2443-abolish-rent

Find Phil's new book, Counting Like a State, here: kansaspress.ku.edu/9780700639687/

Death Panel merch here (patrons get a discount code): www.deathpanel.net/merch

As always, support Death Panel at www.patreon.com/deathpanelpod

The Pro-Infection Presidency w/ Jane Thomason

Lyrics:

I can't live every day in fear of me losing my fear that's keeping me here
I'm stuck in a cycle year after year, where I wanna drown away in my tears
I can't live on my own, I want someone, please hold me so
I'd rather fade away than be alone, I need someone to hold me close

Most days now, I'm stuck in place
I'm keeping a mask plastered on my face
But lately, I've been so out in space
I'm coming in last in the daily race
I'm losing my mind, I'm losing my time
I'm losing my sanity, I'm going blind
I'm losing my tears, I'm losing my fears
I'm losing every ounce of me that keeps me here

I just wanna be alone, but I don't wanna be on my own
I want someone to hold me close, I wanna have someone give me hope

I can't live every day in fear of me losing my fear that's keeping me here
I'm stuck in a cycle year after year, where I wanna drown away in my tears
I can't live on my own, I want someone, please hold me so
I'd rather fade away than be alone, I need someone to hold me close

Most days now, I lie awake
Insomnia keeps me up until daybreak
Lately I feel I need a break
From all the friends in my head that I can't shake
I'm losing my mind, I'm losing my time
I'm losing my sanity, I'm going blind
I'm losing my tears, I'm losing my fears
I'm losing every ounce of me that keeps me here

I just wanna be alone, but I don't wanna be on my own
I want   someone to hold me close, I wanna have someone give me hope

I can't live every day in fear of me losing my fear that's keeping me here
I'm stuck in a cycle year after year, where I wanna drown away in my tears
I can't live on my own, I want someone, please hold me so
I'd rather fade away than be alone, I need someone to hold me close

Hold Me Close (Prod. RFM Beats)

A fusion of punchy basslines and a synth melody inspired by the meditative flow of a d kurd handpan. A call to break free from conformity and return to your weird, raw and authentic self.

Back to Alien

Separation bass

“This Is My Meltdown” is a raw, piano-driven power ballad that unapologetically explores the inner world of an autistic woman hitting emotional overload.
It’s not a cry for pity — it’s a demand for understanding, autonomy, and space.
Cinematic, emotional, and unfiltered, this track is for anyone who’s ever been told they’re too much for simply being themselves.

This is not broken. This is not wrong.
This is real.
This is my meltdown.

Written from the perspective of lived neurodivergent experience.
Respect it. Feel it. Share it.

#autisticvoice
#neurodivergentmusic
#powerballad
#emotionalpop
#femalevocals
#pianoballad
#mentalhealth
#autisticwomen
#rawlyrics
#cinematicpop
#meltdownsong
#letmebeme
#australianartist
#disabilitypride

This Is My Meltdown (Just Let Me Be Me)

This recording is an audio version of my article 'Rethinking Behaviour and Belonging: Why “What Works” in 2025 Needs to Mean More', originally published on 31 August 2025.

In it, I explore why behaviour cannot be reduced to compliance, how masking and refusal reveal hidden pressures, and why leadership, consistency, and high expectations must be redefined if inclusion is to be real.

Read the full article at https://katecoldrick.com/2025/08/31/rethinking-behaviour-and-belonging-why-what-works-in-2025-needs-to-mean-more/

Kate Coldrick – Rethinking Behaviour and Belonging: Why “What Works” Needs Rethinking (Audio)

Are “calm” classrooms really inclusive?

In this audio reading, Kate Coldrick explores how behaviour policies that prize quietness and compliance can mistake masking for belonging — and what schools can do instead to create environments where neurodivergent students can be themselves.

Originally published on katecoldrick.com, this piece examines the tension between “calm” and “camouflage,” challenging the idea that outward calmness equals inclusion. Read the original at: https://katecoldrick.com/2025/09/03/calm-or-camouflage-how-behaviour-policies-misread-belonging/

Written and read by: Kate Coldrick
Follow Kate’s writing on inclusive practice, literacy, and neurodiversity at katecoldrick.com

Kate Coldrick - Calm or Camouflage? How Behaviour Policies Misread Belonging (Audio)

I am a sound designer and I work at the YLE, Finnish broadcasting company. Here are some of my own sound stuff for you to listen.

You can listen (and watch with additional slideshow) my audio documentary "La Perla - A Treasure Among Guitars" here with English subtitles: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgCweC22QhI

Just a guy with a voice. If my music speaks to you, that means the world to me

Autistic Adult writing lyrics for songs for healing from PTSD, Domestic Violence, and Coercive Control and seeking Trauma Informed Care For Front Liners. All my songs are FREE, I invite artists to record my songs as long as words not changed and attribution given to AusticZone. Still building this platform so please be patient while I organise things. Bless you

Kate Coldrick – Inclusive Education Audio

Kate Coldrick is a literacy tutor, researcher, and educational writer specialising in inclusive strategies for neurodivergent learners. She develops research-informed resources for Functional Skills and GCSE English, phonics, orthographic mapping, and inclusive classroom practice.

This channel features audio versions of Kate’s blog posts and articles from across her platforms - making her writing more accessible and available in spoken form.

Politics, culture, and public policy from the left. Stay alive another week.

w/ Beatrice Adler-Bolton, Artie Vierkant, Phil Rocco and Jules Gill-Peterson. 

https://www.patreon.com/deathpanelpod

New tracks tagged #masking