For My Listeners

At key moments in my life I have come across songs and other art forms - books, lyrics, poetry - that were exactly the right thing that I needed to help me through it. 

This is one of the reasons I do this work. 

I hope some listeners find some healing from this - this is for you. 

Credits:
A big thank you to Axel for approaching me for a song, and for handling this version so beautifully. 

Original Song Arrangement, Lyrics, Vocals, Vocal Arrangement: Tam Jennifer 
Music, Production, New Chords and Musical Arrangement: Axel Menningen
https://on.soundcloud.com/T9HezDWMSEmsq2nr9

Other versions:

This song has two mixes, Axel and I decided to release one on each of our accounts. We found it hard to choose between them - but luckily we each favoured a different one(ever so slightly! - so hard to choose!), and this seemed like a great solution. 

And there is also the original Demo that I recorded in 2021.

Original:
https://soundcloud.com/teejaymusicasides/time-alone-demo-tam-jennifer?si=bd416bf47c254ae894aaf41faa22a053&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

The Other Mix:
https://soundcloud.com/axel-m-501052973/time-alone-feat-tam-jennifer?si=77ded4b4a88449cc98f49b512f5261cf&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

Lyrics:
I worked up a sense of self,
Being all by myself,
Time alone,
No time with others.
.
Worked up a sense of self,
Growing up by myself,
Was time alone,
Without a mother.
.
And I know, and I know, and I know,
This is not forever. No.
And I know, and I know, we'll never be, together,
Again.
.
Oh I know, and I know, and I know,
Self made is clever. Oh.
But I know, oh I know, we'll never be,
Forever, again.
.
I worked up a sense of self,
Being all by myself.
Time alone,
No time with others.
.
Worked up a sense of self,
All by myself.
Cos time alone, means,
No time with others.
.
Come to me darling, oh oh.
To the place where the horizon meets up with the sun.
Run to me darling, my dear.
Drift away so we can play,
In Neverland.
.
No no no, no no, no no.
No no no, no no, no no.
.
I worked up a sense of self,
Being all by myself.
Time alone,
No time with others.
.
I worked up a sense of self,
Being all by myself.
Time alone,
Without you!
.
Don't say you love me, no oh oh oh.
Cos I see the look in your eyes and I know.
Don't say you love me no oh oh oh.
Cos I miss you more when you're next to me than when you, go.
.
Time alone, oh oh.
Time alone, oh oh.
Time alone, no time with others, no.
Time alone in Neverland.
.
© Tam Jennifer Hastings, Axel Menningen, 2024. All rights reserved.

Time Alone (with Axel Menningen, 2024)

Cosmic Soup

Link to video where I tell the story behind the song : https://youtu.be/cilXaNM0IoI?si=IbBwc2wlxYTwoADH 


In Catholic school, whenever I misbehaved, the nuns used to pull my hair.
If I could go back in time and do it all again, I’d gab some clippers and shave my head bare.
I did eight years of hard time in Catholic school
I was never the kid who was considered cool
Eight straight years of Catholic School and somehow, I survived
Eight straight years of Catholic School.  Thank God I’m still alive  
My first-grade teacher was a nun, who if you’re penmanship was sloppy
She’d make you take all your books and stand there holding them in the back of the room.
She was like a witch except instead of a pointy hat she wore a habit
She carried a crucifix instead of broom.
I did eight years of hard time in Catholic School
I was never the kid who was considered cool
The cafeteria food tasted horrible, but I had to eat it
I had to wash it down with milk that was warm and sour
I’d try to fold my plate in half and throw it away, but the nuns would catch me and make me eat it
It’s like they had this secret food wasting detection superpower
Every year your birthday, it was customary for the kids in the recess yard,
To grab you and kick you and punch you for every year of your age.
I still have flashbacks of a girl with pointy hard black shoes kicking me really hard in my rib cage.
My fifth-grade teacher Sister Margaret she’d been teaching for way too long
It was time for her to retire but they let her teach another year and that was wrong
She had long grey whiskers growing out of her chin
She’d sit at her desk and trim them with of scissors and you sure as hell better not grin
She’d tell cautionary tales about innocent kids who got into cars strangers
She seemed to enjoy describing all the bloody graphic details of the danger.
I did eight years of hard time in Catholic school
I was never the kid who was considered cool
Eight straight years of Catholic School and somehow, I survived
Eight straight years of Catholic School.  Thank God I’m still alive

Catholic School

We are pleased to present track 8, the final track, from our latest album, 'Haunting One Seven,' full album available on Bandcamp, we hope you’ll enjoy!

outstation.bandcamp.com/album/haunting-one-seven

Waiting For Someone

Easy now, don't let our love go wrong
I'd never hurt you, or mean you any harm
Darling can't you see

I wouldn't want to lose your love
I wouldn't want to lose your love
I couldn't stand the pain
You know it'd drive me insane
Darling I need your love
And if tomorrow would be easier for you

And there's nothing that I can say or I can do
Darling, please come home, you know
I wouldn't want to lose your love

I wouldn't want to lose your love
I couldn't stand the pain
You know it'd drive me insane
Darling I need your love

You're tellin' me that I've been foolish this time
You're tellin' me that I don't know my own mind
But darling can't you see ya know 
 
I wouldn't want to lose your love
I wouldn't want to lose your love
I couldn't stand the pain
You know it'd drive me insane

Darling I need your love (love love love love.......)
Darling I need your love (love love love love.......)
Darling I need your love (love love love love.......)

Solo

V1.06

I Wouldn't Want to Lose Your Love

Vocals and lyrics by Special Cecilia
https://soundcloud.com/specialceciliacappellas

Music, production and art by Cosmic Keanu (not AI)

“And a step backward, after making a wrong turn, is a step in the right direction.”
― Kurt Vonnegut, Player Piano

Sweet Escape or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the AI (Feat. Special Cecilia)

Felix is Sleeping

Another rough 'n ready Improvisation with my Saturna Island friend, illio!

I love his Rhythmic sense. It lets me shuffle 'n dance as i get a little Jazzy. ;-)

May you enJOY!

I'm on my ES7 Stage Piano, and illio is playin' his classical acoustic guitar with gypsy like abandon.  Recorded Live on our ZOOM H2N stereo Mic.

Shufflin'

So the bones of this came from Mobygratis.com. I changed it a good bit, there were no chords, so I added some and gave it a structure. I took away some things and added 3 guitars, some synths and percussion, and a fender rhodes. I could have stripped Moby out of it completely but I didn’t so now I have a collaboration with Moby! lol. I had a lot of fun with it, I’ve already picked out our next collaboration lol.

The original file was <<1960s house 2 at Mobygratis.com>>if  you want to check it out

i’m not the one, no  i’m not the one
i’m not a child of god, i’m a son of a gun 
there ain’t no halo on my head
i go where angels fear to tread
the fate of the world ain’t in my hands
i’m just an ordinary man

i’m not the one, baby, i;m not the one
It was a twist of fate, twists like a knife to the bone
i ain’t the light that leads the way
i’m the dark where your deepest fears are made
go lay your sins on some other man
i’m not your sacrificial lamb
  
lost in the shadows i came undone
then i woke up in the blinding sun
now the veil it feels so thin
was i redeemed or was i condemned

i’m not the one, just leave me alone
i’m not the one now go on home
just let me be
baby i’m not the one just set me free
there’s nothing that i can do
let me break it down for you

Not the one

Not The One

I have a cassette tape from 1977 which Texas born Doug McCourtney sang an original song he had written, I was able to extract his vocals and my backing vocal and provide new music arrangement with his vocals added. It was an honor to create this in memory of Doug. Gone but not forgotten. He was a true talent.

Equal Time / Written and sung by Doug McCourtney

Time For You
By DPmusicUk 

🎶 

The clock is ticking in my chest tonight...
A quiet war...
A losing fight.

🎶 

Hands spin fast but I stand still...
The world’s a race...
I’ve lost the will.

🎶 

But there’s a spark...
I feel it glow...
A quiet call...
It starts to grow.

🎶 

It’s time for you...
It’s time for me...
To break the chains and set us free.

🎶 

Time for love...
Time for truth...
Time to find the fire of youth...
Time for you...

Oh time for you.

🎶 

The streets are rivers...
The lights are stars...
I’m chasing echoes of who we are.

🎶 

Each step I take feels like a dream...
The road is endless...
Or so it seems.

🎶 

But there’s a flame...
It won’t burn out...
A tiny whisper...
A mighty shout.

🎶 

It’s time for you...
It’s time for me...
To break the chains and set us free.

🎶 

Time for love...
Time for truth...
Time to find the fire of youth...

Time for you...
Oh time for you.

🎸 

🎶 

It’s time for you...
It’s time for me...
To break the chains and set us free.

🎶 

Time for love...
Time for truth...
Time to find the fire of youth.

🎶 

Time for you...
Oh, time for you.

Time Alone (with Axel Menningen, 2024)

Ben - Tam Jennifer