produced by pekarot

completely non profit

lyrics

she said hold me
but i cant promise ill feel it im seeing stars 
is it haunting
that theres no pain from a blade if its sharp enough
and the gauze sits tight over covered scars
but its damp with blood and it smells of rot
sweat soaked nights in a bricked out yard
with my carved up fingers spilling fat n tar
and im barely concious but ill never yawn
as i stare straight faced at this silent dawn
and im such a sucker for a pretty face
when she looks at me i just melt n place
signals sent are so badly mixed
as my head is empty like a bedroom sit
and i write these songs when im feeling sick
cause a state of panic is how i exist

so i numb myself and try to take away the things that make me care

dont pretend u were there

my heart beats heavy hidden in my chest
n i feel the blood flow out the wound in my neck
n ive said this before but ur face drags the air from my chest 
if u laid me down id do the rest
please do not fret

honestly? im still miserable
but its not ur fault, we were both involved
and i am not but a shit-stained mark
on her polaroids of a bedroom wall

so i sit and i just drink myself to death again for one more night

ima fuck up my life 

i just hate the fact im tired all the god damn time

bell's line of road (pekarot)

lyrics

can’t even face me this evening when i shut the door and run
baby this feels wrong 
like everything’s undone
i put down the foot, but all that says is that you’ve won
girl it’s not my brain
yeah it’s u toxic on this one

foggy mirror, a long drive
misty fields, and a grey sky
eyes on glass, as it spitsrain
waters wet, the tears u shed were crocodile

i see yellow lines but not th same thats on th road
we’re in different times its spiralling out of control
u dont share my highs and i jus keep that on th low
its getting cold now girl i gotta go (shoutout shizu)

ill jus pack my backs, no intent of coming back home
we were on a path were i thought u couldn’t break this mould
delusion got th best of me, guess i was never told
it was written in the stars but now its more than cold

cold cold yeah its more than cold
ice shards forming on my arms and i cant feel my toes
hope ur somewhere where the logs ablaze or that of coal
ill be sitting in the outlands where its well below

i hope ur happy as u weren’t before
ill say take care while on hardwood floors
dreams of incoming meteors
oh on my chest i can feel the force

this pressures stronger coz of what u said
depressing stronger than ive ever felt
an old mossed statue
but my heart still melts
deep in th dark forest will u find urself

i see yellow lines but not th same thats on th road
we’re in different times its spiralling out of control
u dont share my highs and i jus keep that on th low
its getting cold now girl i gotta go (shoutout shizux2)

ill jus pack my backs, no intent of coming back home
we were on a path were i thought u couldn’t break this mould
delusion got th best of me, guess i was never told
it was written in the stars but now its more than cold

cold (caves)

someday ill find solace


i couldn't just be everything that you wanted or everything that i could be
but everyone's starting to hold me back, though maybe i should flip the scene
i take everything and i break it apart, swear im ripping and stretching the seams
and everyone knows that im okay, but nobodies checking on me.

i used to say that i have changed
my pain is fake, i waste away
ill take the day, my friends are late
i hated fate, now i will wait

for u
or anyone to show up now
i knew
that i could be alone now

shes got cold green eyes, and ive got nowhere to run
this pain is flowing through my veins, i feel so fucking dumb
take your time, its never too late to come
i find my peace in apathy, with the barrel of a gun..

i couldn't just be everything that you wanted or everything that i could be
but everyone's starting to hold me back, though maybe i should flip the scene
i take everything and i break it apart, swear im ripping and stretching the seams
and everyone knows that im okay, but nobodies checking on me.

i used to say that i have changed
my pain is fake, i waste away
ill take the day, my friends are late
i hated fate, now i will wait

i used to say that i have changed
my pain is fake, i waste away
ill take the day, my friends are late
i hated fate, now i will wait

for u
or anyone to show up now
i knew
that i could be alone now

is anyone there? (moneo)

hate u ft. sendflowrs (sorrow bringer)

drawn 2 u (flesh)

luv u all <3

s/o neverforever :) also s/o hero for the thingy on the end RAHHHHH I LUV U

--
in my mind i think im dying
i think i kinda like it
fkn saw her saw me crying
sorry still gotta lie and
tell u that im always fine
that blow ur fucking mind
i think ur wasting time
i think im taking my

life 
bottled shots steady sippin on shooters
6 days off on mr bueller
6dogs blast thru my computer
fuck a price
jus gotta ball till it feel im cooler
mask the fact im a fucking loser

after all i jus made me lose her.

slit my wrist
what a bitch
miserable little kid
i'll jus sleep till i dip
feel like shit
write my list

in my mind i think im dying
i think i kinda like it
fkn saw her saw me crying
sorry still gotta lie and
tell u that im always fine
that blow ur fucking mind
i think ur wasting time
i think im taking my~

9tails cover <3 shoutout miles

null point (neverforever)

@xobroken @jolst

I feel guilty because I didn't write you back
The letter that you sent still had your heart attached
I've been driving round at 3:00am 
driving through the streets again
I've got to adjust the seat again
Because your not there

Yeah you're around his and probably fucking kissing him
Fuck that
Shoot him
Dump my mag
I'm skrting
Ruger might solve my problems
But i know I'm fucked up
Gucci might solve my problems
But i know I'm fucked up
Don't hit me up and want my heart back
Don't hit me up  and act all sad
Hugo boss yeah Hugo boss
Lacoste on my feet I'm feeling sick
Don't hit me up and want my heart back
Don't hit me up and act all sad
Hugo boss yeah Hugo boss
Lacoste on my feet I'm feeling sick

@xobroken

Got me feeling guilty but I know you’re with him
I’ll fill that boy with hollows while I do it with a grin
What you sayin baby? You just make me wanna sin for you
Sorry I didn’t write you back, I can’t stand what I did to you.
I was mixin chemicals
Always Overdosing i swear it’s so typical
I can feel the distance between all your words it’s hurting me.
Everything you said fucked up my head I let you murder me

I feel guilty because I didn't write you back
The letter that you sent still had your heart attached
I've been driving round at 3:00am 
driving through the streets again
I've got to adjust the seat again
Because your not there

Yeah you're around his and probably fucking kissing him
Fuck that
Shoot him
Dump my mag
I'm skrting
Ruger might solve my problems
But i know I'm fucked up
Gucci might solve my problems
But i know I'm fucked up

blameworthy w/ xobroken & jolst

i'll make this my own if it kills me

credits:
@jolst
@toobears
@punkworldthreat
@x1fern
@fantasycamp
@ejcarrmusic

lyrics:
I can't win 'em all
I'm on fuck 'em all
I won't take the fall
If i did no wrong
I don't know what to say
People want me gone
I can't live my life this way
I had to change up

I can't spell it out
Where I'm from, where I'll go
I know I've been trying hard
Getting out of my home
It's a cycle that repeats
I ain't getting any sleep
I'm so tired of the cold
Wear the willow when it weeps

I could cry, but the tears all dried up
Baby what's your sign? I got trouble keeping up
And I'll always take the drive, I don't wanna fly up
Monaco my thighs and the chain is grape tucked

I want it all on me
Winter, fall on me
In the sky, turning blind
Keep it tall on me
I'm alright, no I'm fine
You can call on me
My disguise, in your eyes
Nothing altering

Nothing altering
Catch me when I'm faltering
I wanna be something so badly you know that I'm trying, you know that I'm offering
But you see through me
Purple with the bruising
Keep it in my cup
'Cause it's the only thing that's soothing

I've been like done, I've been like fuck 'em all
I'm never having much luck with y'all
I was just trying to show some love
But I'm left here in the dust
Cold like the winter
And I don't want to hinder
So I've been fading slowly
Wonder why I'm so bitter

I can't win 'em all
I'm on fuck 'em all
I won't take the fall
If i did no wrong
I don't know what to say
People want me gone
I can't live my life this way
I had to change up

I can't spell it out
Where I'm from, where I'll go
I know I've been trying hard
Getting out of my home
It's a cycle that repeats
I ain't getting any sleep
I'm so tired of the cold
Wear the willow when it weeps

spotify & apple

tearduct (ft. 1fern) [jolst x punk]

written during the time of meeting @sewerperson

lyrics

i’m wasted force
spent time in the sewers but i wanted more
coz when i left back to reality i felt lost i just needed merly discourse

tell me ur story 
tell me where’s home
show me the future
ik it’s cold but

if i hit 40
u need 2 know
that this was ur doing to which i owe my soul

been here since day 1
i wish it showed
where was this love at 
where did it go omg

u see we’re bonded
but different holes 
that we climbed out of 
i hope ur proud of me

5 yrs of listening 
th dust has settled yeh things r so different
that shit was splifferent
taught me to write my own book and spot out the fiction
put a purpose in som of these bad chapters 
gave me a mission

the track was rusted now tunnel vision 
things r so clear when im zoned in and listening 
life is worth living 
found from within but without u
its missing
especiilay when i miss home

ik ur lost
this wrld can be cruel but u haven’t yet lost…

i saw the bridges then the fire
id stroll so peaceful in the mire
i’ve been so many destinations but no scenes compare to this. i’m not a cryer

but i can’t help but shed a tear
a lot past brought out tnite
to keep it tight th_heavy beers
to stay surreal i kept it light

i’ve put a body 2 a voice
and i wish that i could stop time
i dont know how i got here 
but im not gonna question why
ima live this fuckin moment when u hand me that old mic
sing our fucking lungs out 
forget our sorrowed lives

sewers

_sewers (secre x javiifontan)

halfhearted (https://soundcloud.com/user-642636378)
FøRD (https://soundcloud.com/breckenford)

Greenwood:
ice on my shit, when i'm stopping it
(burning cold when i hit)
i just left an ounce where my body is
(up inside of this bitch)
up inside my head as soon i'm clocking it
(clocking shit and i dip)
they won't find a reason, it ain't obvious 
i promise it

i call out in the snow
(somewhere to feel life)
i wonder where it goes
(someone to take mine)
i don't know if you know 
(fade in the foglight)
that we've been here before
something else gotta give i don't know why

FøRD:
seems like every day time slips 
saying mayday
lucky life I live if you say that then you don’t know me
cuz i deal with the phonies and the frauds on the daily
they make me an insomniac why everybody hate me
they act like they all want me but they really just betraying 

baby often makin me so silent make me shaky
I’m waitin while faded

the lights up in our basement 
still shaded but luckily it’s still vacant

so come down when u wasted
I’ll change it to that playlist 
I’ll wash away the parts that you invisioned would be painless
girl you make me so brain dead 
like grab another latex get in bed get undressed and then I’ll say what to do next

halfhearted:
who’s next in line
got me walking through a dream
i’m on ur mind
but it’s nothing like it seems

u pushing me so far
my heart been living on the brink
gotta shoulder full of scars
i think you like to watch me bleed

but i don’t got time for you

lay me deep down i’m dancing with the devil by myself
where to go now
i’m sick of knowing you won’t ever help
you’re not helping me

Greenwood:
up the dose, yeah i'm taking two
steady shifting, i feel it move
i was losing my mind in truth
i was hoping you'd see it too
i was hoping you'd wanna go
i was hoping you'd see the pain
i was broken you wouldn't know
but that don't mean it don't hurt the same
up inside of my room
fuck the job, i'm aloof
drink the pain on the roof
nothing helps, i'm the proof
nothing changes in oakwood
couldn't text back cause my phone fucked
no one here even knows us
like i'm not here to be social

Someone Used to Live Here (w/ halfhearted & FøRD)

i know the mix is horrible, but just uhhh pretend like it sounds good idk 
also yes it's all pitched down slightly i was self conscious <3

shoutout freestyling hooks

lyrics:
she say put the lime in
ion know what the time is
i be staying silent
find me in here crying
told me keep it simple
whip crash like a rental
crackin wraps 2 reassemble
cant get u out the mental

overseas
flow like fit so lysterine
pop out white tee no mr clean
my pyt bitch we shootin scenes
nigga who u fooling
steady boolin
wrists look like to do list
opposite of living i put my bullet in n shoot it at me
settle mind poundin dread, fill it out w/ lead
MIA in my head, think im better dead
fuck it up off the drugs so i write instead
try run away, just to stay inside of my bed
stuck inside the cold, ion really go out
every song abt me because im always alone now
loud dissociating till my bowl within the background
jus a fuck up lil bitch guess u found out

she say put the lime in
ion know what the time is
i be staying silent
find me in here crying
told me keep it simple
whip crash like a rental
crackin wraps 2 reassemble
cant get u out the mental

rental_2003 (travis xantana)

there is music here

http://soundcloud.com/timeless-archive

is anyone there? (moneo)

torva

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