These songs are a deeply personal and emotional exploration of regret, longing, and the weight of past choices. They delve into the pain of nostalgia, the ache of lost opportunities, and the struggle to find solace in a present haunted by memories of what could have been. Through poignant lyrics and haunting melodies, the songs convey a sense of yearning for a different path, a desire to turn back time and make things right, but ultimately, they acknowledge the irreversibility of the past and the need to find a way to move forward, scarred but stronger.

My songs of Regret

These songs are powerful and emotional tributes to hope, love, and support in the face of darkness, pain, and struggles. They convey a message of solidarity and encouragement, urging the listener to hold on to hope and not give up to suicide. The lyrics address themes of mental health, self-doubt, and the importance of human connection in overcoming adversity.

Personally, these songs were inspired by two significant events. Initially, I was moved by Lynn Carey Saylor's poignant song "Hold on and Breathe," which holds a special place in my heart. As I tried to emulate her skill, I found myself creating multiple songs that explore the same emotions and ideas. Later, the tragic loss of my sister Tammy (May 25th, 1961 - July 12th, 2006) further fueled my creative journey as I poured my grief and reflections into these songs. I'll leave it up to you to guess, which I feel came the closest to Lynn's masterpiece.

The songs' tones are compassionate, empathetic, and uplifting, with a focus on the transformative power of love, friendship, and support. They offer a message of resilience and hope, encouraging the listener to face their challenges with courage and confidence. The language is poetic and evocative, with vivid imagery and metaphors that create a sense of intimacy and understanding. The songs' structures and melodies are soaring and anthemic, making them feel like rallying cries for hope and resilience. Overall, these songs are a testament to the human spirit's capacity for love, support, and hope in the face of adversity.

I initially wrote the above description with the first three songs in mind, but I've come to realize that the remaining songs share similar themes and messages. 


My Before Suicide songs

These songs are a deeply personal and emotional journey of self-expression, creativity, and resilience in the face of depression, loneliness, pain, and despair. They explore the therapeutic power of writing and music as a means of coping with the darkness and finding solace in the silence. I want to convey a sense of longing for connection and understanding while also celebrating the liberating force of artistic expression. Ultimately, they offer a message of hope and perseverance, affirming the human spirit's capacity to find beauty and meaning in the midst of sorrow and pain.

My Cathartic Writing songs

These songs are calls for compassion. They urge empathy and understanding for those struggling with depression, a growing and often misunderstood mental health issue. Many individuals grappling with depression feel ashamed to open up to loved ones, leading to further isolation and intensified feelings of despair. Misinterpreted as withdrawal, their loved ones may pull away, exacerbating the suffering. Through poignant lyrics, these songs advocate for compassion and support, encouraging listeners to be a lifeline for those navigating the darkness of depression.

My Mental Health songs

This is a collection of powerful songs that confront the shadows of mental health. This thought-provoking playlist delves into the complexities of depression, suicidal thoughts, loneliness, and emotional turmoil.

Featuring haunting melodies and raw, honest lyrics, these songs provide a cathartic outlet for those struggling with inner demons. From the desperation of "Last Resort" to the haunting vulnerability of "Help" and the intense emotional release of "Kill the Noise", each track sheds light on the darkness that often accompanies mental health struggles.

Purpose: To provide a voice for those struggling, foster empathy and understanding, and encourage open conversations about mental health.

Resources: If you're struggling with mental health issues, please reach out to:

- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-TALK)
- Crisis Text Line (text HOME to 741741)
- Your local mental health resources


*Warning:* This collection addresses sensitive topics; listener discretion is advised.

Sad/Depression/Suicide 😢😭

My Dark/Edgy songs

This playlist is for the moments when the silence feels deafening, and the only sound is the echo of your own thoughts. It's for the nights when the city outside feels alive, but inside, you're struggling to find connection. These songs are a reminder that you're not alone in feeling alone - that there are others out there who have felt the same emptiness, the same longing for human touch.



My songs about Loneliness

Have you ever noticed how SoundCloud's 'Top Tracks' seems way off? So, I wanted to set the record straight. Here are my actual top tracks with over 1000 plays each, ranked by play count from most to least.

My REAL Top Tracks!

Get ready to immerse yourself in a powerful and emotional ballad that explores the themes of regret, redemption, and the longing for a second chance. This very personal heartfelt song takes you on a journey of self-reflection, as I confront my past mistakes and the choices that led me down a darker path. 

With poignant lyrics and a soaring chorus, this song is a raw and honest expression of the human experience, acknowledging the pain of past regrets and the desire to make things right. Despite the longing to turn back time, this song ultimately finds hope in the present and the promise of a brighter future.


LYRICS:

Verse 1:
In the mirror, a reflection stares
A life of what-ifs, and regrets that linger there
If I could go back, I'd make it right
Graduate high school, shine with all my light
Chorus:
But life took a turn, down a darker road
I got lost in the haze, of a deadly mode
I'd take it back, if I could turn the tide
But the past is gone, and I'm left to hide

Verse 2:
I'd never have touched, the poison that stole
My hopes and dreams, my heart and soul
I'd have found my way, through the darkest night
And never have faced, the devil's cruel light

Chorus:
But life took a turn, down a darker road
I got lost in the haze, of a deadly mode
I'd take it back, if I could turn the tide
But the past is gone, and I'm left to hide

Bridge:
And the shot that rang, in the silent night
A desperate cry, for a fleeting light
If I could go back, I'd take it away
And find my strength, in a brighter day

Chorus:
But life took a turn, down a darker road
I got lost in the haze, of a deadly mode
I'd take it back, if I could turn the tide
But the past is gone, and I'm left to hide

Outro:
If I could go back, I'd make it right
But for now, I'll hold on to the light
And hope that someday, I'll find my way
To a brand new dawn, and a brighter day.

If I Could Go Back

Immerse yourself in the hauntingly beautiful soul-stirring ballad that delves into the depths of heartbreak, regret, and longing. This emotional journey weaves together fragile memories, shattered dreams, and the lingering pain of what could never be.

With poignant lyrics and soaring melodies, this song captures the bittersweet essence of lost love and the struggle to move on. The haunting vocals and ethereal instrumentation evoke a sense of yearning, as if trapped in a loop of unending melancholy.

Yet, amidst the sorrow, a glimmer of hope emerges – the promise of resilience and the determination to mend. Let the echoes of this heartfelt song resonate with your own experiences, and find solace in the knowledge that you're not alone in the darkness.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In the silence, echoes of who we used to be,
Faded photographs, haunting reminders set me free.
Chasing shadows, memories dance like ghosts at night,
But every step I take just dims the fading light.

Letting go feels like drowning in the sea.

[Chorus]
These shattered dreams won't be pieced together whole,
Memories linger, they linger in my soul.
Fading echoes of what never could be,
Caught in a loop of unending melancholy.

[Verse 2]
Regrets like anchors weigh me down in this storm,
The whispers of the past that never keep me warm.
Time slips away like sand through my trembling hands,
Leaving only traces of forgotten lands.

Heartbreak engraves itself, carving deep lines.

[Chorus]
These shattered dreams won't be pieced together whole,
Memories linger, they linger in my soul.
Fading echoes of what never could be,
Caught in a loop of unending melancholy.

[Outro]
Through the pain, I'll find my way to mend.
But the echoes of regret will never end.

Shattered Dreams

This song is a heartfelt and emotional plea to a loved one who is struggling with the darkness of depression, pain, and despair, and is contemplating leaving this world behind. The lyrics offer a message of hope, comfort, and solidarity, reminding the listener that they are not alone, and that there is help and support available to face the shadows and find a way to heal and repair. With a sense of urgency and compassion, the song urges the listener to hold on to life, to find a way to thrive, and to remember that their presence matters, their life is dear, and they are loved, valued, and needed.

This song was inspired by two significant events that shook my world. Initially, I was moved by Lynn Carey Saylor's poignant song "Hold on and Breathe," https://www.reverbnation.com/lynncareysaylorsongwriter/song/13089893-hold-on-and-breathe which holds a special place in my heart. As I tried to emulate her skill, I found myself creating multiple songs that explore the same emotions and ideas. Also, the tragic loss of my sister Tammy (May 25th, 1961 - July 12th, 2006) further fueled my creative journey as I poured my grief and reflections into this song.


LYRICS:

Verse 1:
In the darkness, I hear your voice
A whispered cry, a heartfelt choice
To leave this world, to end the pain
But I'm begging you, dear friend, don't go in vain
Chorus:
You're not alone, I'm here by your side
We can face the shadows, and let the light divide
The weight you carry, I'll help you bear
Don't leave me now, we'll find a way to heal and repair

Verse 2:
Your smile, your laugh, your eyes so bright
A world without you, would be a endless night
I know the hurt, the tears, the fears
But together, we can dry them, through all the years

Chorus:
You're not alone, I'm here by your side
We can face the shadows, and let the light divide
The weight you carry, I'll help you bear
Don't leave me now, we'll find a way to heal and repair

Bridge:
We'll talk it out, we'll find a way
Through every storm, a brighter day
You have so much to live for, so much to give
Your life is precious, don't let it slip away, please live

Chorus:
You're not alone, I'm here by your side
We can face the shadows, and let the light divide
The weight you carry, I'll help you bear
Don't leave me now, we'll find a way to heal and repair

Outro:
You're loved, you're valued, you're needed here
Your presence matters, your life is dear
Don't go, dear friend, don't say goodbye
We'll get through this, we'll find a way to thrive.


2024

Dont Leave Me Now

This song is a heartfelt and emotional message of hope, comfort, and love to someone who is struggling with feelings of loneliness, darkness, despair, and contemplating suicide. 

This song was inspired by two significant events that shook my world. Initially, I was moved by Lynn Carey Saylor's poignant song "Hold on and Breathe," https://www.reverbnation.com/lynncareysaylorsongwriter/song/13089893-hold-on-and-breathe which holds a special place in my heart. As I tried to emulate her skill, I found myself creating multiple songs that explore the same emotions and ideas. Also, the tragic loss of my sister Tammy (May 25th, 1961 - July 12th, 2006) to suicide further fueled my creative journey as I poured my grief and reflections into this song.

The song begins with a gentle and reassuring verse, followed by a chorus that affirms the listener's value and worth. The second verse continues to offer words of comfort and encouragement, with a focus on the importance of holding on to hope and seeking support.

The song builds towards a repeated chorus, which becomes a powerful affirmation of the listener's inner strength and resilience. The outro provides a final message of hope and reassurance, reminding the listener that they are loved, valued, and not alone.

Throughout the song, the lyrics emphasize the importance of human connection, empathy, and support in overcoming even the darkest of challenges. The song's message is one of hope, comfort, and love, reminding the listener that they are cherished, valued, and loved beyond compare.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In the shadows of the night, when you feel all alone,
I reach out through the darkness, let my love be your home.
You are cherished, you are valued, more than whispered dreams,
Hold on, darling, breathe deep, nothing's ever what it seems.
Just take a breath, hold on tight, I'm right here with you. 

[Chorus]
You’re loved beyond compare, don’t fade into the night,
We’ll find a way to rise, restore your inner light.
You’re not alone in this, just hold my hand, believe,
Let’s talk it out, my friend, together we’ll achieve. 

[Verse 2]
When the weight of all your sorrows pulls you to the ground,
Remember every heartbeat, every healing sound. 
We'll untangle all the troubles, let the light break through,
I’ll be your strength, your comfort, let me cover you.
There’s a light beyond this pain, together we will fight. 

[Chorus]
You’re loved beyond compare, don’t fade into the night,
We’ll find a way to rise, restore your inner light.
You’re not alone in this, just hold my hand, believe,
Let’s talk it out, my friend, together we’ll achieve. 

[Outro]
You’re the spark, the hope, and you’re so loved, you see?
Just hold on for a moment, let’s find our way to be.




Loved Beyond Compare

This song is a heartfelt plea to a loved one on the edge, a desperate cry to hold on to hope and not succumb to the darkness of suicide. This powerful ballad is a testament to the transformative power of love and connection, urging listeners to cling to life, even in the most desperate moments. 

This song was inspired by two significant events that shook my world. Initially, I was moved by Lynn Carey Saylor's poignant song "Hold on and Breathe," https://www.reverbnation.com/lynncareysaylorsongwriter/song/13089893-hold-on-and-breathe which holds a special place in my heart. As I tried to emulate her skill, I found myself creating multiple songs that explore the same emotions and ideas. Also, the tragic loss of my sister Tammy (May 25th, 1961 - July 12th, 2006) further fueled my creative journey as I poured my grief and reflections into this song.

With tender lyrics and soaring melodies, 'Hold On, Love' envelops listeners in a sense of safety and support. The song acknowledges the weight of the world's unkindness while rallying with a message of love, care, and collective strength. It's a beacon of hope, urging listeners to hold on to life, even when the darkness closes in. 

This song is a testament to the human spirit's capacity for love, support, and hope in the face of adversity. Let the uplifting message and soaring melodies wrap you in comfort and reassurance.

#AokiChallenge #contest 

LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
I see the shadows creeping in your mind,  
The weight of the world is so unkind,  
But hear me now, girl, you're not alone,  
This heart beats for you, it's your home.

Just take a breath, let the darkness fade,  
I promise you, love's the light we've made.

[Chorus]
Hold on, love, there's so much to fight,  
Your light shines bright, even in the night,  
You're so loved, don’t forget that we care,  
Let’s find the strength, let’s lay it bare.

[Verse 2]
Each tear you cry, it tells a story,  
But don’t let it steal your own glory,  
We'll talk it out, just take my hand,  
Together we'll rise, together we stand.

Every moment’s a chance to reclaim,  
To face the storm and call your name.

[Chorus]
Hold on, love, there's so much to fight,  
Your light shines bright, even in the night,  
You're so loved, don’t forget that we care,  
Let’s find the strength, let’s lay it bare.

[Outro]
You’re worth a million, don’t drift away,  
Together we’ll face the break of day.

#AokiChallenge #contest 

Hold On Love

Verse 1:
In the dead of night, I find my voice
A lonely whisper, a heartfelt choice
To pour my soul into the empty space
And let the melodies fill the darkened place

Chorus:
Oh, these songs I write, they set me free
A cathartic release, from the pain that's me
In the silence, I find my sound
But echoes of loneliness, forever surround

Verse 2:
Sleepless nights, they become my friend
As I strum and sing, till the morning light creeps in
I write of hope, of love, of shattered dreams
But the emptiness remains, like a hollow theme

Chorus:
Oh, these songs I write, they set me free
A cathartic release, from the pain that's me
In the silence, I find my sound
But echoes of loneliness, forever surround

Bridge:
Maybe someday, someone will hear
The whispers of my heart, the tears I hold dear
But till then, I'll write in the night
And let the music be, my guiding light

Chorus:
Oh, these songs I write, they set me free
A cathartic release, from the pain that's me
In the silence, I find my sound
But echoes of loneliness, forever surround

Outro:
So I'll keep on writing, through the dark of night
And maybe someday, I'll find the light
But till then, these songs will be
My solace, my refuge, my melancholy sea

#AokiChallenge #contest

Melodies in the Dark

While screamo metal isn't typically my genre of choice, I felt an intense, aggressive sound was necessary to convey the emotional depth of this song. For those who have experienced the overwhelming darkness of severe depression, you'll understand the urge to unleash a primal scream into the night, seeking release from the suffocating pain. This song is for you.

#AokiChallenge #contest 


LYRICS

[Verse 1]
In the silence of the midnight, I'm lost in my thoughts,
Pages filled with sorrow, every line’s a battle fought,
Words spill out like tears, but no one sees their light,
I'm a ghost in my room, screaming into the night.

These songs are my escape, my own form of therapy.

[Chorus]
I write songs for the lonely, whispers of despair,
Where the ink bleeds my sorrow, floats on empty air,
No one hears my story, just echoes of my plight,
But these verses keep me breathing through the endless night.

[Verse 2]
Each strum of the guitar is a heartbeat out loud,
Melodies of anguish, wrapped up in the crowd,
But in this darkened corner, I'm safe with the pain,
Wishing for a moment, someone else felt the same.

Lost in this rhythm, where the shadows stay awake.

[Chorus]
I write songs for the lonely, whispers of despair,
Where the ink bleeds my sorrow, floats on empty air,
No one hears my story, just echoes of my plight,
But these verses keep me breathing through the endless night.

[Outro]
In the quiet, I'm alive, just me and my pain,
These songs will never fade, they’ll keep me sane.

Midnight Confessions

This song is a heartfelt and poignant call to action, shining a light on the struggles of those living with mental illness and the importance of compassion, kindness, and support. With emotive lyrics and a soaring chorus, the song urges us to reach out and offer a helping hand, to listen and to love, rather than turning away from those who are suffering. It's a powerful reminder that we are not alone in our struggles, and that together, we can heal and find hope.


LYRICS:

Verse 1:
In the shadows, they hide their pain
Afraid to speak, ashamed to explain
The weight they carry, the darkness they face
A silent struggle, a lonely place

Chorus:
Oh, can't you see, they're crying out for help?
A gentle touch, a listening ear, a loving wealth
Compassion and kindness, can heal the soul
Don't turn away, let love be the goal

Verse 2:
They reach out for hands, but find empty space
Abandoned and alone, a hollow place
Their hearts are breaking, their spirits worn
The silence is deafening, the pain is born

Chorus:
Oh, can't you see, they're crying out for help?
A gentle touch, a listening ear, a loving wealth
Compassion and kindness, can heal the soul
Don't turn away, let love be the goal

Bridge:
Mental illness, a widespread plight
Getting worse each day, a constant fight
Let's break the silence, let's shine a light
Let love and kindness, be the guiding light

Chorus:
Oh, can't you see, they're crying out for help?
A gentle touch, a listening ear, a loving wealth
Compassion and kindness, can heal the soul
Don't turn away, let love be the goal

Outro:
So let's stand together, hand in hand
Support each other, in this troubled land
Let love and kindness, be the way
To heal the hurt, to brighten each day.

#AokiChallenge #contest 

Crying Out for Help

A heartfelt anthem of hope and resilience, "The Light That Shines" illuminates the darkness I've often found myself in. This song is my journey through self-doubt, pain, and isolation, and the transformative power of compassion and kindness that helped me find my way.

Inspired by my own struggles, I wrote this song to remind myself (and others) that:

We don't have to face the darkness alone
Empathy and understanding can be the bridge between hurt and healing
Love and compassion can shine a light in the darkest moments

Join me in this uplifting track, as we walk together through the darkness and find strength in collective hope.


#EDM, #Pop-Rock with #DrumAndBass influences


#Mental-Health, #Self-Compassion, #Struggling, #Self-Doubt, #Isolation, #Empathy, #Hope, #Uplifting, #Emotional, #Hopeful, #Inspirational


LYRICS:

Verse 1:
Invisible chains, they bind and they weigh
A heart that's heavy, a soul that's grey
The darkness whispers, "You're not enough"
A lie that's echoed, in every troubled thought

Chorus:
Oh, let compassion be the light that shines
For those who suffer, in the darkest of minds
Let kindness be the bridge, that spans the sea
Between the hurt, and the healing, let love be

Verse 2:
The masks we wear, the smiles we fake
Conceal the pain, the tears we can't unmake
The weight of shadows, that follow us home
A constant reminder, we're not alone

Chorus:
Oh, let compassion be the light that shines
For those who suffer, in the darkest of minds
Let kindness be the bridge, that spans the sea
Between the hurt, and the healing, let love be

Bridge:
We need your empathy, your understanding ear
A gentle touch, a reassuring word, a calming fear
Let's break the silence, let's shatter the night
And let the warmth of love, be the beacon light

Chorus:
Oh, let compassion be the light that shines
For those who suffer, in the darkest of minds
Let kindness be the bridge, that spans the sea
Between the hurt, and the healing, let love be

Outro:
So let's walk together, through the darkest night
And let our collective heart, be the guiding light
For in compassion's embrace, we'll find the strength
To heal, to hope, to rise above the length.

The Light That Shines

Verse 1:
We used to laugh, we used to cry
But now I'm left to wonder why
You all disappeared, without a fight
Left me drowning in this darkest night

Chorus:
You call yourself friends, but where are you now?
When I need you most, you're nowhere to be found
I'm lost and alone, in this endless pain
You've abandoned me, like a burden you can't sustain

Verse 2:
I tried to reach out, but you turned away
Afraid of my demons, you couldn't stay
You said I'd changed, that I'm not the same
But you never tried to understand my shame

Chorus:
You call yourself friends, but where are you now?
When I need you most, you're nowhere to be found
I'm lost and alone, in this endless pain
You've abandoned me, like a burden you can't sustain

Bridge:
Maybe I'm too much, maybe I'm too broken
But a true friend would try to unspoken
The words I need to hear, the hand I need to hold
But you're all gone, and I'm left to grow old

Chorus:
You call yourself friends, but where are you now?
When I need you most, you're nowhere to be found
I'm lost and alone, in this endless pain
You've abandoned me, like a burden you can't sustain

Outro:
So I'll lay here, in this emptiness
A shadow of what I used to be, I guess
And I'll wonder why, you all gave up on me
And left me to face, this misery.

Where Are You Now (version 2)

Where Are You Now (version 1)

This song is a powerful and emotional ballad that sheds light on the painful and traumatic experiences of a child who has suffered abuse and neglect. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of a young heart lost in darkness, shadows, and silence, with tears falling like rain and scars etched on their soul. The chorus is a call to action, urging the voiceless to scream, to fight through nightmares, and to stand up in the shadows to bring truth to light. The song's message is one of resilience, hope, and liberation, with the outro offering a message of freedom and healing. The tone is haunting, intense, and deeply moving, with a soaring melody that conveys the emotional depth of the lyrics.

My own personal description of this song is in the description of 'My songs about Child Abuse' Playlist...
https://on.soundcloud.com/YSCep


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In the silence of the night, shadows creep,
Whispers of a heart that's lost, and deep,
A child’s tears fall, like rain on the ground,
Inside these walls, where no love is found.

Echoes of pain, scars etched on my soul, 
This troubled heart never feels whole.

[Chorus]
Scream for the voiceless, the cries unheard,
Lost in the chaos, no solace, no word,
Fight through the nightmares, reclaim what is right,
Stand up in the shadows, bring truth to the light.

[Verse 2]
Behind closed doors, where darkness resides,
A broken spirit, where innocence hides,
Anger burns like a flame, fierce and wild,
Each bruise a reminder of the lost child.

Fury roars, can’t hold it inside,
Trapped in a battle, where hope has died.

[Chorus]
Scream for the voiceless, the cries unheard,
Lost in the chaos, no solace, no word,
Fight through the nightmares, reclaim what is right,
Stand up in the shadows, bring truth to the light.

[Outro]
Rise from the ashes, let the past bleed,
A heart still beating, but forever freed.

Whispers of the Silent

Step into the haunting world of 'Monsters Under my Bed,' where childhood fears come alive. This eerie, atmospheric track weaves a terrifying tale of creatures lurking beneath the bed, waiting for nightfall. With haunting melodies and pulse-pounding rhythms, this song embodies the primal fear of being trapped in a never-ending nightmare. 

Imagine yourself as a child, lying in bed, paralyzed with fear as whispers creep and monsters stir beneath. The darkness pulsates with malevolent life, feeding on your dread. Will you escape, or will the monsters consume you? 

Embark on this spine-chilling journey, where fear and imagination collide. 'Monsters Under my Bed' will leave you breathless, questioning what lurks in the shadows.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
In the shadows where they play,  
Whispers creep and hide away,  
Little feet upon the floor,  
Monsters' eyes, they want more. 

Beneath the bed, hear their growl,  
Waiting for me to take a bow. 

[Chorus]
Under my bed, they wait for night,  
Silent screams, too scared to fight,  
Dread is clutching, fear's the guest,  
Monsters rise, they know me best. 

[Verse 2]
Fingers scrape across the wood,  
Heartbeats echo, misunderstood,  
Every creak a chance to run,  
But darkness laughs, "I'm far from done". 

Just a nightmare painted black,  
In the dark, there's no way back. 

[Chorus]
Under my bed, they wait for night,  
Silent screams, too scared to fight,  
Dread is clutching, fear's the guest,  
Monsters rise, they know me best. 

[Verse 3]
Shadows dance upon the wall,
Echoes of forgotten calls,
Footsteps fade, the darkness grows,
Monsters' whispers, my heart knows. 

[Bridge]
Under terror, can't escape,
Darkness surrounds, my soul aches,
Frozen in fear, I lie awake,
Monsters' playground, my heart shakes. 

[Verse 4]
Creaking floorboards, a sinister grin,
Eyes glowing bright, from within,
The darkness pulses, alive and strong,
Monsters' realm, where I belong. 

[Chorus]
Under my bed, they wait for night,
Silent screams, too scared to fight,
Dread is clutching, fear's the guest,
Monsters rise, they know me best. 

[Repeat Verse 3]
Shadows dance upon the wall,
Echoes of forgotten calls,
Footsteps fade, the darkness grows,
Monsters' whispers, my heart knows. 

[Repeat Verse 3]
Shadows dance upon the wall,
Echoes of forgotten calls,
Footsteps fade, the darkness grows,
Monsters' whispers, my heart knows. 

[Outro]
In the silence, I hear their call,
A haunting whisper, beyond them all,
A chilling reminder, I'm not free,
Monsters under my bed, eternally.


Monsters Under My Bed

"Stand For Them" is a heartfelt, stirring anthem dedicated to animal welfare and the fight against animal cruelty. The song shines a light on the struggles of abused and neglected animals, with poignant lyrics that tug at the heartstrings.

The verse paints vivid pictures of suffering, while the soaring chorus declares a resolute commitment to action, vowing to be a voice for the voiceless. The bridge rallies listeners to stand united for justice, compassion, and empathy.

This song was actually inspired after reading a post on X by a singer/songwriter that I highly admire and respect.  Lynn Carey Saylor posted a video of a poor defensless dog left tied to a pole on I-75 as Hurricane Milton approached. 
https://x.com/LynnCareySaylor/status/1844056625264406627
After being completely appalled by that video, I wrote this song to stand up for all abused animals out there.  


LYRICS:

[Verse 1:]
In darkened shelters, or alone in the night
Tied to fences, or fleeing from fright
Innocent paws, and helpless eyes
Crying out for mercy, and a loving surprise

[Chorus:]
But we won't turn away, we won't ignore
The furry hearts, battered and scarred once more
We'll rise up, a beacon of light
For the voiceless creatures, we'll fight through the night

[Verse 2:]
From puppy mills to abandoned streets
Victims of cruelty, their trust retreats
But we'll be their refuge, their guiding hand
Leading them to safety, across this broken land

[Chorus:]
We won't turn away, we won't ignore
The furry hearts, battered and scarred once more
We'll rise up, a beacon of light
For the voiceless creatures, we'll fight through the night

[Bridge:]
We'll stand united, a collective cry
For justice, compassion, and a world that tries
To protect and serve, with empathy and love
For every creature, sent from above

[Chorus:]
We won't turn away, we won't ignore
The furry hearts, battered and scarred once more
We'll rise up, a beacon of light
For the voiceless creatures, we'll fight through the night

[Outro:]
Their unbroken spirit, a flame that remains
A testament to love's enduring refrains
We'll amplify their voice, until it's heard
For every abused soul, we'll be the cure.

Stand for Them

Step into the realm of dark seduction with this haunting, atmospheric track. "Dark Delight" weaves a spell of forbidden desire, tantalizing danger, and intoxicating passion. Hypnotic vocals, driving beats, and eerie melodies conjure an irresistible world of shadows, secrets, and sweet surrender.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1:]
Midnight eyes, they gleam with fire
I'm the one you covet, your darkest desire
Whispers in the night, I'll take control
You'll do as I say, lose your soul

[Chorus:]
I'm the queen of shadows, king of pain
I'll drive you mad, make you love the game
I'm the thrill you crave, the danger zone
Where the darkness calls, I'll make you my own

[Verse 2:]
Red lips smile, I'll take the fall
You'll chase the high, I'll give you it all
Secrets kept, desires revealed
In the darkness, we'll conceal

[Chorus:]
I'm the queen of shadows, king of pain
I'll drive you mad, make you love the game
I'm the thrill you crave, the danger zone
Where the darkness calls, I'll make you my own

[Verse 2:]
Red lips smile, I'll take the fall
You'll chase the high, I'll give you it all
Secrets kept, desires revealed
In the darkness, we'll conceal

[Bridge:]
We'll dance with demons, play with fire
Our love's a sin, our hearts desire
No rules apply, no limits set
In this dark delight, we'll forget

[Chorus:]X2
I'm the queen of shadows, king of pain
I'll drive you mad, make you love the game
I'm the thrill you crave, the danger zone
Where the darkness calls, I'll make you my own

Dark Delight (Version 1)

Embark on a mystical journey with "Down the Witches' Road"! This enchanting song weaves a spellbinding tale of magic, mystery and empowerment. With eerie and captivating melodies, it transports you to a realm of ancient wisdom and mystique. Explore the unknown, unlock hidden gates and embrace the power within. The song features haunting vocals and instrumentals, witches' chants and incantations, blending dark pop, gothic folk and witchwave elements. Perfect for fans of atmospheric soundscapes! 


LYRICS: 

*Verse 1*
Seekest thou the road
To all that's foul and fair
Gather sisters: fire,
Water, earth and air
Darkest hour, wake thy power
Earthly and divine
Burn and brew with coven true
And glory shall be thine 

*Chorus*
Down, down, down the road
Down the witches' road 

*Verse 2*
Circle sewn with fate
Unlock thy hidden gate
Marching ever forward
'Neath the wooded shrine
I stray not from the path
I hold death's hand in mine
Primal night, giveth sight
Familiar by thy side
If one be gone, we carry on
Spirit as our guide 

*Chorus*
Down, down, down the road
Down the witches' road 

*Bridge*
Blood and tears and bone
Maiden, Mother, Crone
The road is wild and wicked
Winding through the wood
Where all that's wrong is right
And all that's bad is good 

*Verse 3*
Through many miles of tricks and trials
We'll wander high and low
Tame your fears, a door appears
The time has come to go 

*Chorus*
Down, down, down the road
Down the witches' road 

*Outro*
Follow me, my friend
To glory at the end


Down the Witches Road

This song was inspired by the themes and messages of "Pulse (Love Will Always Win) by Melissa Etheridge". 

"Love Will Rise" is a poignant and uplifting anthem that shines light on humanity's struggles, encouraging empathy and unity. Soulful vocals soar amidst an inspirational melody, underscoring the power of love to overcome fear, hate and darkness. The heartfelt lyrics celebrate shared humanity, embracing diversity and inclusivity, with a stirring chorus that resonates deeply. This powerful ballad inspires resilience, reminding us that love's pulse beats strong, and together, we can rise above adversity.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
In the shadows, hearts are breaking
Silent screams, souls are aching
Why do we fear what we don't know?
Everybody's got a heartbeat to show 

[Chorus]
I am human, I am love
My heart beats strong, sent from above
Love will rise, it will shine
Underneath the skin, we're all divine 

[Verse 2]
In the night, tears fall like rain
For the lives lost, for the pain
We'll find the strength, we'll stand as one
Everybody's got a pulse, beating like the sun 

[Chorus]
I am human, I am love
My heart beats strong, sent from above
Love will rise, it will shine
Underneath the skin, we're all divine 

[Verse 3]
Who'll you stand with when love is the test?
Who'll you defend when hate's the guest?
We'll rise together, hand in hand
Love's pulse beats strong, across this land 

[Chorus]
I am human, I am love
My heart beats strong, sent from above
Love will rise, it will shine
Underneath the skin, we're all divine 

[Outro]
Hands up if you're alive
Hands up if you believe in love's light
Love will rise, it will shine
Underneath the skin, we're all divine


Love Will Rise

"Lonely and Scared" is a haunting, introspective ballad probing the shadows of painful relationships. With poignant lyrics and soothing vocals, it confronts the darkness of recurring heartache, questioning destiny and self-worth. The song's narrative delves into the anguish of emotional and physical scars, echoing the longing for answers: "Why does love come with a price?" and "Do I even deserve?" It's a relatable, soul-stirring exploration of vulnerability, resonating with those weary of love's trials, wondering if happiness is within reach.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
I feel the echoes of a love that's long gone,
A heart that’s been shattered, just trying to hold on.
From scars on my skin to wounds deep inside,
Every chance that I take, I just seem to collide.
Got me questioning life, all that I’ve known 

[Chorus]
Why does love come with a price that I pay?
When will the darkness just fade into day?
I’m seeking the light, but it ends in a blur,
Lonely and scared, do I even deserve? 

[Verse 2]
Each face is a mirror, reflecting my fears,
I’m trapped in this cycle, lost count of the years.
Still haunted by moments of trust that I've lent,
Wondering if love was a path I was meant.
Maybe it’s fate, or maybe it’s me?

[Chorus]
Why does love come with a price that I pay?
When will the darkness just fade into day?
I’m seeking the light, but it ends in a blur,
Lonely and scared, do I even deserve? 

[Outro]
Twenty years later, I’m still on my own.
Love's just a ghost that I've never known.

Lonely and Scared

"Break the Silence" is a poignant anthem of resilience and hope, encouraging embracing vulnerability, speaking truth and finding strength in shared struggles. With soaring vocals and an inspirational melody, it shines light on the transformative power of self-expression, overcoming adversity, healing through art and unity, reminding us our voices matter and together, we can rise above darkness.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
We live our lives in shades of gray
Words unspoken, feelings astray
Losing hope with every passing day
But I believe we'll find our way
Spoken words cut through the dark 

[Chorus]
Let the silence break, let your voice spark
From the depths of our souls, we embark
On a journey of healing, of love, of art 

[Verse 2]
Tears fall like rain in the night
Facing demons, ready to fight
Yet in our vulnerability, we find our might
Together, we'll emerge in the light
Whispers of hope in the dead of night 

[Chorus]
Let the silence break, let your voice spark
From the depths of our souls, we embark
On a journey of healing, of love, of art 

[Chorus]
Let the silence break, let your voice spark
From the depths of our souls, we embark
On a journey of healing, of love, of art


Break the Silence

"Burnin' Me" is a sultry, rock anthem that captures the all-consuming passion and pain of a tumultuous relationship. With soulful vocals and fiery instrumentation, this song explores the paradoxical thrill of desire and heartache.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
(Uh oh uh oh ah uh oh)
(Uh oh uh oh ah uh oh)
You take my soul, got me under control
(Uh oh uh oh ah uh oh)
Squeeze it tight, feel the fire ignite
(Uh oh uh oh ah)
Oh, you play with my mind, all through the night
And I'm lost, in this burning light 

[Chorus]
Oh, it burns me, like a wildfire
Consuming me, heart and desire
Hurts so bad, but feels so right
Burnin' me, through the night
(Uh oh uh oh ah uh oh) 

[Verse 2]
You take my soul, got me under control
But I'll take the pain, 'cause I adore
The way you love me, like a flame
Melting my heart, with every shame 

[Chorus]
Oh, it burns me, like a wildfire
Consuming me, heart and desire
Hurts so bad, but feels so right
Burnin' me, through the night
(Uh oh uh oh ah uh oh) 

[Bridge]
Don't stop, don't slow down
Take me higher, to the burning ground
Where love and pain collide 

[Chorus]
Oh, it burns me, like a wildfire
Consuming me, heart and desire
Hurts so bad, but feels so right
Burnin' me, through the night
(Uh oh uh oh ah uh oh) 

[Outro]
Burnin' me, like a flame
(Uh oh uh oh ah uh oh)
Forever yours, in this burning game.

Burnin' Me

"Vines of Doubt" is a poignant, emotional journey through the shadows of self-doubt and fear. Haunting melodies, introspective lyrics, and soaring vocals capture the struggle to overcome.


LYRICS:

[Verse1:]
I'm lost in the shadows, where fear takes its toll
A prisoner of doubt, where darkness makes me whole
I question my worth, and the choices I've made
A never-ending cycle, of self-doubt and shame

[Chorus:]
Vines of doubt, they creep inside my mind
A silent assassin, that I've learned to hide
The weight of my fears, is crushing me down
Vines of doubt, are they my greatest enemy, or my crown?

[Verse 2:]
The silence is deafening, as the world rushes by
A cacophony of chaos, that I try to deny
The vines keep snapping, as new doubts arise
A constant reminder, of my deepest, darkest lies

[Chorus:]
Vines of doubt, they creep inside my mind
A silent assassin, that I've learned to hide
The weight of my fears, is crushing me down
Vines of doubt, are they my greatest enemy, or my crown?

[Bridge:]
Maybe I'll find my way, through the darkness and the pain
Maybe I'll learn to love, and let go of the shame
But till then, I'll sit here, in this endless fight
And wonder, which path to take, through the dark of night

[Chorus:]
Vines of doubt, they creep inside my mind
A silent assassin, that I've learned to hide
The weight of my fears, is crushing me down
Vines of doubt, are they my greatest enemy, or my crown?

[Outro:]
Do I push, do I pull, or do I sit and hide?
Do I leap, do I crawl, or do I step aside?
The vines keep whispering, "you're not enough"
But I'll rise up, and shine, and shatter the doubt.

Vines of Doubt

This song is my passionate protest anthem, voicing my pain and frustration at feeling betrayed by my country's choices. I'm expressing my disillusionment with the system and longing for change. The lyrics reflect my beliefs and values, urging listeners to rise up and demand justice in the face of oppression. 

The song's message is universal, echoing the sentiments of iconic protest songs like "Strange Fruit" by Billie Holiday and "Blowin' in the Wind" by Bob Dylan. These classics have inspired generations to stand against injustice, and my song continues this tradition. 

In my lyrics, I question how decent hearts could stray so far from empathy and righteousness. I condemn the harm inflicted by flawed leadership and the concealment of conscience. My song is a call to action, demanding accountability and integrity from those in power. 

Through my music, I aim to inspire others to join me in seeking justice, equality, and truth. 

https://binged.it/4enZ1TA
https://binged.it/4ehtwKF


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
A nation betrayed, by votes so blind
A criminal in power, justice left behind
The people have spoken, but at what cost?
Integrity lost, as shame is tossed 

[Chorus]
Rise up, voice your pain
America, how could you sustain?
A leader so flawed, with crimes untold
Justice demanded, but votes grew cold 

[Verse 2]
Decent hearts, where did you stray?
Voting for evil, every step of the way
What happened to empathy and right?
Did lies and hate become your guiding light? 

[Chorus]
Rise up, voice your pain
America, how could you sustain?
A leader so flawed, with crimes untold
Justice demanded, but votes grew cold 

[Bridge]
Some say they didn't believe the allegations
Others claim his policies mattered more than his personal life
But can't you see, this man's a threat?
To justice, equality, and all that's just and right? 

[Verse 3]
The damage is done, the harm is real
A nation divided, hearts that conceal
Their conscience asleep, as wrongs unfold
Accountability, lost in the cold 

[Chorus]
Rise up, voice your pain
America, how could you sustain?
A leader so flawed, with crimes untold
Justice demanded, but votes grew cold 

[Outro]
What's wrong with you people, can't you see?
A criminal in the White House, a threat to you and me
How can decent people vote for shame?
Have we lost our moral compass, our hearts to blame?


Criminal in the White House

This is another song inspired by Lynn Carey Saylor, one of my favorite singer/songwriters, and her poignant song "I Wasn't A Friend." 
https://on.soundcloud.com/VfBvk
I draw constant inspiration from her amazing works, and I hope she won't mind! Although I doubt she'll ever hear my songs, her influence on me is undeniable, and I appreciate the creative spark her music and her tweets ignite. 

"The Weight of That Night" is a haunting ballad that tackles the devastating consequences of letting a friend drive drunk. This powerful song weaves a tragic tale of regret, guilt, and longing, recounting the fateful night when silence proved deadly. With poignant lyrics and soaring vocals, it explores the anguish of "what ifs" and the weight of unanswered questions, serving as a stark reminder of the irreversible harm caused by one moment's hesitation. This heartfelt warning urges listeners to speak up and take action, honoring the memory of loved ones lost.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1:]
We laughed and joked, as the night wore on
Never thinking, the consequences would be so wrong
You got behind the wheel, I didn't say a word
Now the silence screams, and I'm forever scarred 

[Chorus:]
Oh, the guilt I bear, the weight I hold
For letting you drive, into the cold
I should've spoken up, I should've been bold
Now you're gone, and I'm left to unfold 

[Verse 2:]
We swerved off course, on that fatal ride
I see the crash, in my mind's eye
Your smile fades fast, as the lights go low
My screams echo, in the darkness that grows 

[Chorus:]
Oh, the guilt I bear, the weight I hold
For letting you drive, into the cold
I should've spoken up, I should've been bold
Now you're gone, and I'm left to unfold 

[Bridge:]
What ifs haunt me, through the endless night
A thousand regrets, a single, fatal sight
One decision, one moment's hesitation
Could've changed the course, of that deadly destination 

[Chorus:]
Oh, the guilt I bear, the weight I hold
For letting you drive, into the cold
I should've spoken up, I should've been bold
Now you're gone, and I'm left to unfold 

[Outro:]
Your memory stays, a constant pain
A reminder of the price I couldn't contain
I'll carry this weight, for all my days
A lesson learned, in the most tragic way.


The Weight Of That Night

Step into a world beyond reality with this enchanting song, where the boundaries of freedom and love blur. Embark on a mesmerizing journey through labyrinths and neon mazes, where secrets unfold and true selves emerge. Dive into the unknown, embracing madness and mystery, and discover the radiant glow of the heart. A surreal exploration of self-discovery, love, and liberation.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1:]
Shatter the glass, step into the night
Where shadows dance, and secrets ignite
Unchain your soul, let the wild one roam
In the carnival of dreams, we'll find our home 

[Chorus:]
Come with me, beyond the mirror
Where reality bends, and freedom's clearer
Leave the ordinary, let's dive into the unknown
Where love and madness blend, and our hearts are made to glow 

[Verse 2:]
Lost in the labyrinth, we'll find our way
Through neon mazes, where desires sway
With every step, our true selves unfold
In this kaleidoscope, our spirits take hold 

[Chorus:]
Come with me, beyond the mirror
Where reality bends, and freedom's clearer
Leave the ordinary, let's dive into the unknown
Where love and madness blend, and our hearts are made to glow 

[Bridge:]
In this whirlwind, we'll find our voice
Where the surreal meets, our deepest choice
To embrace the mystery, to let go and be
In this dreamlike state, our hearts will be free 

[Chorus:]
Come with me, beyond the mirror
Where reality bends, and freedom's clearer
Leave the ordinary, let's dive into the unknown
Where love and madness blend, and our hearts are made to glow 

[Outro:]
Who are you? Who am I?
In this reflected sky
We'll find our truth, we'll find our way
Beyond the mirror, every day.

Beyond the Mirror

2024Buy

This song is a haunting and emotional portrayal of the trauma and pain of child abuse. With lyrics born from personal experience, the song conveys the dark, isolated world of a child suffering in silence. The music is a powerful and evocative blend of gothic rock and symphonic elements, echoing the style of Evanescence. The song's message is one of desperation, hope, and resilience, urging listeners to acknowledge the suffering of innocent children and to shine a light on the darkness of abuse.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
Childhood in shadows dark and cold
Eyes that scream stories never told
Silent echoes bouncing off the walls
Broken dreams from hard
Harsh falls

[Verse 2]
Tiny hands bruised from battles lost
Heart in pieces cold as frost
Trust shattered on the ground
Screams loud but no one hears a sound

[Chorus]
Who will save the broken soul
Fight the darkness swallow it whole
Raise the torch against the night
Shine a light on the child's flight

[Verse 3]
Tears fall like acid rain
Heart hollow numbed from pain
Little voices silenced quick
Grown-ups with games so sick

[Verse 4]
Hope buried deep inside
Wish for wings to spread and glide
Will the morning sun bring light
End this everlasting night

[Chorus]
Who will save the broken soul
Fight the darkness swallow it whole
Raise the torch against the night
Shine a light on the child's flight

Raise the Torch

This song is a haunting and intense exploration of the devastating consequences of betrayal, deception, and heartbreak, weaving a dark narrative of shattered love, broken trust, and the crippling pain of being lied to by the one you love. With eerie imagery and emotional intensity, the song delves into the anguish of discovering a lover's deceit, the suffocating weight of faithless whispers, and the desperate struggle to escape the void of a broken heart.

LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
Whispers in the dark again
Lies dripping from your grin
Broken mirrors show your sin
Shattered love where do I begin

[Verse 2]
Footsteps in a haunted hall
Echoes of a lover’s fall
Truths I never heard at all
Heartbeats turn to ghostly calls

[Chorus]
You’re a traitor of shadows and dreams
Silent screams tearing at the seams
Faithless whispers rip me apart
Falling into the void of your heart

[Verse 3]
Empty words in a hollow night
Promises turn into fright
Cold deceit no hope in sight
Lost in the never-ending fight

[Bridge]
Candles flicker ghosts arise
Drowning in a sea of lies
Faded dawns and poison skies
Seeing through your dead disguise

[Chorus]
You’re a traitor of shadows and dreams
Silent screams tearing at the seams
Faithless whispers rip me apart
Falling into the void of your heart


Traitor of Shadows

This song is a deeply personal and emotional ode to the transformative power of music and creativity. It's about finding solace, peace, and inspiration in the process of writing and composing, and how that creative expression can be a source of comfort, healing, and self-discovery. The lyrics weave a poetic and introspective narrative that explores the intersection of heart, mind, and soul, and how music can be a universal language that transcends words and emotions.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In the silence, I hear your call
A melody whispers, beyond them all
I'm drawn to the shadows, where words come alive
In the darkness, I find my light

[Chorus]
Oh, the symphony of my soul
Echoes of emotions, forever whole
In the harmony of heart and mind
I find my solace, my peace of mind

[Verse 2]
Like a phantom, inspiration haunts me still
A fleeting dream, that I must fulfill
I chase the whispers, through the night's dark veil
And in the morning's light, my heart sets sail

[Chorus]
Oh, the symphony of my soul
Echoes of emotions, forever whole
In the harmony of heart and mind
I find my solace, my peace of mind

[Bridge]
In the language of lyrics, I find my voice
A world of feelings, in a single choice
Of words that weave a tapestry so fine
A reflection of my heart, in rhyme and time

[Chorus]
Oh, the symphony of my soul
Echoes of emotions, forever whole
In the harmony of heart and mind
I find my solace, my peace of mind

[Outro]
And when the music fades away
I'll hold on to the words I've made
For in the silence, they remain
A symphony of love, a heart that still sustains.

Symphony of Love

This song is a deeply personal and emotional reflection on the pain of feeling abandoned, ignored, and silenced by those who were supposed to be there for me. The lyrics are a heartfelt expression of the isolation, shame, and desperation that can come from being left behind by friends and family. It's a cry for help, a plea to be seen and heard, and a testament to the enduring pain of being forgotten. I hope that by sharing this song, I can connect with others who have felt the same way, and remind them that they are not alone.

LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
Whispers in shadows scream to the void
Heartbeats echo yet they are destroyed
Loneliness in a crowded room
Drowned by silence
Left to gloom

[Verse 2]
Eyes like ghosts that fade away
Words unspoken
Got nothin' to say
Walls closing in
Suffocation's near
Eyes burning with unshed tears

[Chorus]
Silent echoes
Call my name
Ignored
Forgotten
In endless shame
Break the silence
Hear my cry
In darkness
Where angels die

[Verse 3]
Mirrors shatter in my mind
Lost reflection
Hard to find
Noise around me
No one hears
Drowning fears
Hiding tears

[Bridge]
Voices muted
Screams are hushed
In this silence
Dreams are crushed
Begging
Pleading
Unheard plea
Won't someone
Someone see me

[Chorus]
Silent echoes
Call my name
Ignored
Forgotten
In endless shame
Break the silence
Hear my cry
In darkness
Where angels die

Where Angels Die

This haunting melody delves into the depths of loneliness and despair that can accompany aging. The song paints a poignant picture of my birthday (February 18th), spent all alone, as I have spent my last ten birthdays. Through its melancholic verses and chorus, it captures the essence of feeling forgotten and invisible as time marches on relentlessly.

The lyrics explore themes of isolation, with silent phones and empty rooms serving as stark reminders of absent friends and family. The imagery of flickering candles symbolizes the fleeting nature of hope and vitality, mirroring the sense of fading away. 

The chorus, with its ironic "Happy birthday to me," underscores the contrast between societal expectations of celebration and the reality of solitude. The bridge delves deeper into existential questions, pondering the meaning of life as one grows older and feels increasingly disconnected from the world.

Throughout the song, there's a palpable sense of resignation and acceptance of one's fate, yet it also subtly hints at a desire for connection and understanding. The Evanescence-inspired style, known for its gothic undertones and emotional intensity, perfectly complements the raw, vulnerable emotions expressed in the lyrics.

This song serves as a poignant reflection on aging, loneliness, and the human need for connection, resonating with anyone who has ever felt overlooked or left behind by the passage of time.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1:]
Another year slips away
Shadows lengthen, hair turns gray
Another birthday, a milestone passed
Memories fade, nothing lasts

[Chorus:]
Happy birthday to me
In the dark, I can't see
Candles flicker, then they're gone
Just like hope, it won't be long

[Verse 2:]
Silent phone, empty room
No one calls to break the gloom
Friends and family, where are you?
Another day I'll muddle through

[Chorus:]
Happy birthday to me
In the dark, I can't see
Candles flicker, then they're gone
Just like hope, it won't be long

[Bridge:]
Time marches on, relentless, cold
I'm left behind as I grow old
Is this all there is to be?
A fading soul, no longer free

[Chorus:]
Happy birthday to me
In the dark, I can't see
Candles flicker, then they're gone
Just like hope, it won't be long

[Outro:]
Happy birthday to me
In the dark, I can't see
Candles flicker, then they're gone
Just like hope, it won't be long
Just like me, were do I belong?

Fading Candles

This song is a heartfelt and emotional expression of the pain and frustration that comes with feeling ignored and unsupported by those who matter most.

Born out of the darkness of depression and loneliness, this song serves as a cathartic release of emotions and a testament to the power of music as a means of healing and self-expression.

The lyrics convey the hurt and anger that comes with sharing my creations with loved ones, only to be met with indifference and silence. It's a painful reminder that sometimes, those who are supposed to care the most can be the ones who hurt us the deepest.

Despite the pain and frustration, this song is also a declaration of resilience and determination. It's a message to those who have ignored and unsupported me, and a testament to the power of music to transcend pain and adversity.

To those who have taken the time to listen to my songs and support me, this song is a heartfelt thank you. Your kindness and encouragement mean the world, and are a reminder that there is still good in this world.

So listen closely to the words, and let the emotions resonate deep within your soul. This song is a gift from my heart, and a reminder that you are not alone in your pain and struggles.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]
In the darkness, I created light
A symphony of emotions, a heartfelt fight
I shared my soul with you, through every lyric and line
But you didn't bother to listen, you didn't even try

[Verse 2]
I thought our bond was stronger, our love more true
But now I'm left to question, if I'm just going through
The motions of a relationship, that's lost and cold
A facade of family and friends, that's growing old

[Pre-Chorus]
You're supposed to care, but you're not even there
A silent indifference, a hollow, empty air
I'm screaming for support, but you're turning a deaf ear
Leaving me to wonder, if you even truly care

[Chorus]
Will you ever take the time, to listen to my songs?
It isn't hard, it doesn't take long
Strangers are lending an ear, and showing they care
Why can't you, family and friends, show me you're there? (Show me you're there!)

[Pre-Chorus]
You're supposed to care, but you're not even there
A silent indifference, a hollow, empty air
I'm screaming for support, but you're turning a deaf ear
Leaving me to wonder, if you even truly care

[Chorus]
Will you ever take the time, to listen to my songs?
It isn't hard, it doesn't take long
Strangers are lending an ear, and showing they care
Why can't you, family and friends, show me you're there? Let me know you truly care!!

[Bridge]
Maybe I'm just a ghost, invisible and unseen
A fleeting thought, a moment's pause, a life un-lived, a dream unseen
But my songs will rise above, my words will cut like a knife
I'll make you hear me, I'll make you see, the pain you've left in my life

[Pre-Chorus]
You're supposed to care, but you're not even there
A silent indifference, a hollow, empty air
I'm screaming for support, but you're turning a deaf ear
Leaving me to wonder, if you even truly care

[Chorus]
Will you ever take the time, to listen to my songs?
It isn't hard, it doesn't take long
Strangers are lending an ear, and showing they care
Why can't you, family and friends, show me you're there?

[Outro]
So I'll keep on writing, my heart beating loud and clear
And maybe someday, you'll hear me, and wipe away my tears
But until then, I'll rise above, creating my songs unbroken and free
A testament to the love, you refuse to give back to me.

So Called Family and Friends

Fracture

This song is a deeply personal reflection on my experiences being institutionalized throughout my lifetime while trying to deal with bipolar-disorder. I recount the trauma, despair, and sense of abandonment I felt within those walls. The lyrics paint a vivid picture of the harsh realities of life inside the institution. 

The song's title, inspired by Ken Kesey's classic novel, aptly captures the feeling of being trapped and losing one's grip on reality.

I recall the "shadows that play" on the walls, the "shattered minds" and "echoes of madness" that haunt the corridors. The chorus conveys the overwhelming sense of confinement and fear I felt, with the repeated phrase "one flew over the cuckoo's nest" becoming a haunting refrain. 

The bridge offers a glimpse into the desperation and powerlessness I felt, but the outro reflects on my journey towards healing and freedom. This song is a raw and emotional account of my experiences, and I hope it resonates with those who have faced similar struggles.


LYRICS:

[Verse 1]  
Sixteen years old, first time they locked me away,  
Behind cold walls where the shadows play.  
Scared and depressed souls, screaming in despair,  
A broken system, no one seems to care.  

[Pre-Chorus]  
Shattered minds in a cage of pain,  
Echoes of madness, driving me insane.  

[Chorus]  
One flew over the cuckoo's nest,  
I felt so trapped, too afraid to rest.  
Those halls of horror, they scarred my soul,  
A place meant to heal had swallowed me whole.  

[Verse 2]  
Rooms that reek of bodies unwashed,  
Dreams shattered, innocence lost.  
Some looked like ghosts wandering the floor,  
While others pound their heads on death’s door.  

[Pre-Chorus]  
Shattered minds in a cage of pain,  
Echoes of madness, driving me insane.  

[Chorus]  
One flew over the cuckoo's nest,  
I felt so trapped, too afraid to rest.  
Those halls of horror, they scarred my soul,  
A place meant to heal had swallowed me whole.  

[Bridge]  
Safety glass won’t break for the desperate leap,  
Orderlies drag bodies while we silently weep.  
Restraints and silence—no voice to fight,  
In those asylums, there’s no end in sight.  

[Chorus X2] 
One flew over the cuckoo's nest,  
I felt so trapped, too afraid to rest.  
Those halls of horror, they scarred my soul,  
A place meant to heal had swallowed me whole.  

[Outro X2]  
Years have passed since I broke free,  
But the memories still haunt and imprison me.  
A cry for change echoes in my chest
No one should have to live through such a cruel test.

One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (Angry version)

This song is a haunting and emotional journey into the depths of darkness, pain, and mental turmoil. It's a raw and honest portrayal of feeling trapped in a never-ending cycle of suffering, with fear, anxiety, and despair looming large. 

The lyrics convey a sense of desperation and hopelessness, as I'm drowning in my own emotions, unable to escape the shadows that haunt me. The song's atmospheric and introspective soundscapes perfectly capture the feeling of being lost and alone in a world that seems to be suffocating me. 

Throughout the song, the I grapple with the idea of losing myself to my inner demons, wondering if I'll ever find a way out of the darkness. The song's poignant and emotional delivery makes for a deeply relatable and cathartic listening experience.


LYRICS: 

[Verse 1]
Lost in the darkness, I'm searching for light
A never-ending nightmare, haunting my sight
Can't sleep, can't wake up, I'm drowning in pain
A prisoner of my mind, forever in chains 

[Chorus]
I'm going under, suffocating slow
A slave to these dreams, that I'll never let go
Is this the end of everything? Or just a new way to bleed?
Trapped in the fog, where shadows proceed 

[Verse 2:]
Fear is a poison, that infects my soul
A constant reminder, of the darkness I hold
I try to escape, but it pulls me back down
A never-ending cycle, of this endless frown 

[Chorus]
I'm going under, suffocating slow
A slave to these dreams, that I'll never let go
Is this the end of everything? Or just a new way to bleed?
Trapped in the fog, where shadows proceed 

[Bridge]
It's true, we're all a little insane
Fear is only in our minds, a toxic refrain
But what if I'm lost, and can't find my way?
Will I forever roam, in this endless gray? 

[Chorus:]
I'm going under, suffocating slow
A slave to these dreams, that I'll never let go
Is this the end of everything? Or just a new way to bleed?
Trapped in the fog, where shadows proceed 

[Outro]
I'm fading away, into the night
A whisper of hope, in this desperate fight
But the darkness whispers, "You'll never be free"
And I'm trapped, forever, in this misery.



I'm Going Under

This song is a haunting and emotional journey through the depths of inner turmoil and desperation, heavily influenced by the atmospheric and introspective soundscapes of Evanescence. I drew inspiration from their iconic style, even borrowing and reworking a few of my favorite lines from their songs to create something unique and personal. The lyrics convey a sense of longing for a love that's real and a deep desire to break free from the darkness and find the way back to oneself. With its soaring vocals and cinematic instrumentation, this song is a poignant exploration of the human experience, inviting listeners to immerse themselves in its emotional depths.


LYRICS: 

[Verse] 
How can you see into my eyes
Like open doors?
Leading you down into my core
Where I've become so numb
Without a soul
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there 

How can you see into my eyes
Like open doors?
Leading you down into my core
Where I've become so numb
Without a soul
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there 

[Chorus]
Can you hear the silence screaming?
The emptiness that's echoing and dreaming
Of a love that's real, of a heart that beats
But mine is frozen, locked in defeat
Until you find the key to set me free 

[Bridge]
Maybe in the darkness, there's a light
A beacon calling, guiding me through the night
Maybe I'll find my way, maybe I'll be free
Maybe I'll learn to love, to live, to be me 

[Outro]
Wake me from this endless night
And I'll rise, I'll shine, I'll ignite
The fire that's been burning deep inside
And I'll find my way, I'll be alive.


Wake Me Up Inside

Automatic For The People

Everybody Hurts

20/20

Last Resort (2020)

Better Without You

Songwriting has been a lifelong passion for me, dating back to elementary school when I first began crafting stories, poems, and eventually lyrics. As a former drummer in various bands, I always relied on others to bring my words to life musically. However, after a long hiatus from drumming, I decided to take the leap and learn to compose music to accompany my lyrics. Through classes and dedication, I've embarked on a new journey, breathing fresh life into old lyrics and penning new ones. You'll find a mix of older and newer works here. Especially for some of the lyrics. 

Music has been a part of me for as long as I can remember. One of my earliest memories is being completely entranced by 'The Little Drummer Boy' as a very young child. There was something about the rhythm and the melody that just captivated me. I must have played it a thousand times, wearing the record out, and from that moment on, I was hooked. I knew I wanted to be a drummer and to create that magic for others. 

But I was too young then, and of course, I couldn't afford a drum set just yet. So, I turned to writing as a way to express myself. As I mentioned above, I started with stories, then poems, and eventually, lyrics. I found that writing was not only a way to tap into my creativity, but also a way to process my emotions and experiences. 

As I grew older, my love for music only deepened. I realized that music has this incredible power to transport us to different times and places, to evoke emotions and memories that we thought were long forgotten. It's a universal language that can bring people together like nothing else can. 

For me, writing lyrics is a cathartic experience. It's a way for me to tap into my emotions, to process the world around me, and to create something that I hope will resonate with others. And when I hear my words come to life in a song, it's truly magical. It's a feeling that never gets old, and it's what keeps me coming back to music time and time again. 

I love many genres of music and artists of many genres. And if you listen to some of my songs, you will find that I like to make songs of different genres as well as mix different genres into each song. One of my all-time favorite bands is Evanescence, and I have made a lot of songs where I have tried my best to emulate that sound. 

Now, I have recently started experimenting with new sounds. I never heard of glitch beats before I took music classes, and now I'm fascinated with the sound, so I have been experimenting with glitch beats recently. 

I hope you enjoy some of my songs. And thanks so much to everyone who has been listening so far. I truly appreciate it. I welcome constructive feedback to help me grow as an artist, and I appreciate your support. ❤️

BTW if you follow me, I will ALWAYS follow back. If I like your music, I will follow you, but if you don't follow me back within a week or so I will probably unfollow. The same goes for when I see someone listening to my music, I WILL follow, however, if they don't follow me back within a week or so, I'll unfollow, because I'd like to even out my follows versus followers numbers. I'm following way more than I'm being followed back. 😢 Hope that makes sense? 😘













One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (Angry version)

VickStiX