prod. tiedforsilver 2023

it's been cold the last 7 years

prod. Tied For Silver & flesh
Stream "nothin for myself" on all platforms:
https://open.spotify.com/track/5AnGZfuMXdnoRakHN7yl7W?si=3e3ca43d8f87409b
https://youtu.be/i9n_57gX1xA

nothin for myself

mixed/mastered by me
art by 4gettr
prod tied for silver 


Lyrics:

i hope you never find out from me, 
just exactly who i am cause i dont want you to leave
i think its clear to see the lack of efficacy
and your decisions clearly have an effect on me
yea i just wanna see you, im sick of only phone calls
i really miss the feelin of your skin without your clothes on
im sorry that i said that oh the medicine makes me go off
and if tied for silver made then you know its gonna blow up

i been in my head i got some shit i cant decide now
tell me to my face baby come fuck around and find out
and if you told me sooner maybe my heart wouldnt be dried out
and baby much like you i think i'd like to be tied down

all this time's let me see
that what i thought was wrong was really comin from me
and with this space in between
if its you and i then i think i'd like to dream

i hope you never find out from me, 
just exactly who i am cause i dont want you to leave
i think its clear to see the lack of efficacy
and your decisions clearly have an effect on me
yea i just wanna see you, im sick of only phone calls
i really miss the feelin of your skin without your clothes on
im sorry that i said that oh the medicine makes me go off
and if tied for silver made then you know its gonna blow up

i feel insecure about us (tied for silver)

Lyrics: 

i dont wanna fight, i just wanna be by your side uhh
please don't leave me alone, won't you hold me through the night uh uhhh
cause my brain always tells me, that life's not worth living
and i can't decide whether to keep on creating
and honestly i can tell i'm the only one hating
but still i can't get it out of my mind
cause i'm lost in thought yea lately i been ruminating 
on the chance that i might end my suffering

i can't save it 
oh im finally facing
the inevitable end of our relationship
and ain't this what you wanted
don't tell me that your haunted
by the ghost of your decisions 
oh this time around was harder

cause i been feeling like im in a loop again
honestly i just think i need new friends
cause all of mine still hate me 
and the rest they tried to play me
every time i text you ain't been gettin replies lately
all these burdens i'm stressed out
i just wanna be held down
baby i'm so sorry i know it hurts you when i carve my arm now 

oh they're caught in my throat
all these words i'm tryna say
baby i'm teary eyed, and i'm fuckin terrified
i just want you to hold me
i'm so tired of always bein lonely
honestly i didn't think i'd make it this far
if i don't see you now then i'll catch you in the next form
we only text so it gets lost in translation
but i hope you know that when i check up on you it means i miss you
and baby i can't deal with all this fuckin distance
but when you don't text me all day oh it makes me worry 

cause i gotta respect myself enough to speak my mind
i can't go a day without hearin from you and just be fine
that's not how love works baby i need your attention
i need to know if you care or if you're just pretending
these thoughts are running all around inside my mind
and no matter how hard i try i just can't stop thinking 
and i don't know, oh should i give up now, or hold on until the end

i cant stop thinking (tied for silver x flesh)

Cry Once, Cry Twice

prod @tiedforsilver x @fleshgolem

i don’t show emotion till the moment i break
i don’t want u to see me in this state
give me a lifeline, give me somewhere to feel safe
up in the night time, where i can hide my face
tucked in shadows, diving head first into the shallow
off with it all into the gallows

i’m in a 6 figure truck counting digits
my foot on the gas till i get to the finish
the shit i been thru, for u i wouldn’t wish it
it taught me a ton about pain and forgiveness

hope i turned out the way u were hoping
all the love i’ve known was broken
bloody benz ripped my chest open
she said flashbacks had her soaking

making the most out the time that i have
called some others my brothers they let me down bad
now this g23 all that’s watching my back
overflowed by emotions i can’t go out sad

did this all on my own
so i don’t answer my phone
pull up in a 4 door
creep real slow
limousine tint covering my windows

been waiting patiently
but nobody’s saving me
tear off the shackles and burn down castle
i won’t let u table me

bittersweet taste in my mouth is this betrayal?
the wires crossed it’s best if u cut the cable
i’m overheating my cores becoming unstable
run far away from here but keep me in ur prayers

adoring illusions and people that tell me they mean it but acting confusing
im always pursuing the benefit of the doubt so i don’t have to lash out when i lose it
u look in my eyes and tell me we’re the same but when i look at u i see nothing congruent
cause i would still die for the people who double crossed me and they left me there laying in ruin

i need space i need distance
i need substance in my system
not from drugs but made of love
don’t come around me inconsistent

so let me know
let me know
let me know
just let me know cause i

did this all on my own
so i don’t answer my phone
pull up in a 4 door
creep real slow
limousine tint covering my windows

been waiting patiently
but nobody’s saving me
tear off the shackles and burn down castle
i won’t let u table me

bittersweet taste in my mouth is this betrayal?
the wires crossed it’s best if u cut the cable
i’m overheating my cores becoming unstable
run far away from here but keep me in ur prayers

lmk (tied for silver x flesh golem)

I thought I needed you
I thought I'd bleed for you
I thought I'd rip open my heart so I could be with you

girl I never needed you
why did I bleed for you
ripped open my heart to give a fraction of the world to you
fraction of the world to you

no I'm not okay
but I'll say that I am in the doorway
I don't ever wanna get in your way
I just wanna be with you who cares about the foreplay

killing my vitals slowly
how did I get so angry
ripping my hair out with my claws
I don't wanna be here like at all

time kills everything I thought I'd never see you again
withered away as all the termites ate at my skin
everybody said I fucked up when I told them the truth
maybe I am just a suck up to the plot of the news

dont wait for me
two blankets in the trunk of the 95 pontiac babygirl that's a must

oh cant you see
I did this all for you and I so can we still be us

so can we still be us
I did this all so we can still be us

so can we still be us
I did this all for you and I so can we still be us

can we still be us

can we still be us (secre x heyrick)

\ lyrics /
noooo i dont know whats wrong
you're fuckin everything up, i never wanted to
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you

noooo you never tell me wrong
i'm left with all of these texts i ain't responding to
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you

and she said "don't go, you were my everything"
gave you my heart but then you break it like it's anything
retrace my steps back to you
i'll tell you everything i couldn't do

and you walked away as the leaves would fall
and i reached my arm but you didn't help
and under my skin you'll uncover and hide
the darkest place that i can reside

and i replay the moment when you leave and depart
while i just lay in my bed with open arms
and i don't wanna hurt myself again and again
but it seems like the start of the end

noooo i dont know whats wrong
you're fuckin everything up, i never wanted to
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you

noooo you never tell me wrong
i'm left with all of these texts i ain't responding to
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you
i swear ive gone through too much to fall in love with you

too much w/ vislyn [prod. michael harrison]

This ones talking about my poor spending habits/retail therapy habits.  Truth is no matter how many nice things you might own, it will never replace the feeling good people in your life can bring you </3

Sadness Like Designer

[chorus:]
i cant help but think bout callin u
i dont know where i went wrong with u
dont know why i follow U
cuz when i see your face yeah my heart breaks
and u know what to say just when i cave

verse:
maybe i should find a new bitch
or i could fall right inside your trap like im stupid
fucking useless, i dont wanna do this
i knew all along he was your man
i still act clueless when im fucking u
tell me is he loving u?
i just want the best 4 u
but othertimes i hope u feel my pain
so baby tell me if this is a game

hook:

outro:
i cant help but think bout callin u
i dont know why i still bother u 
now im up on top of you
you grabbin on my waist
im not easy to replace

i cant stop thinking (tied for silver x flesh)

getbetter